budding verse

i am i am i am                          18

[buddingverse]

Every time I fall it’s on my own terms

Even if im violent winds one night

Each life I die it’s by my own hands

And mornings, I’m the sun inside

Every love i mourn

You know its never easy, but this time it scares me too

Every time I fall it’s on my own terms

Even if the pushing arms are you

[buddingverse]

Last night I dreamed you loved me good

surrounded by angel moss and steaing breaths from autumn

Dizzy and wet we stood in clouds, 

And cleaned together; healed together, planned

And when we came inside

you were waiting for us both

standing in some fake boyish power

standing like you used again

and the clean one still clutching my wet hand

fell to his knees and inside smoke rings

was eaten whole

right in front of me

I fell and salted your mothers carpet

And I prayed not be absorbed, but drown

You stood above in paltry power

gulping spirits down

And I woke up some time

but i was still in a dream

i am still in a dream

i am still in a dream

I am going

not quite sure

[julykings]

when joni mitchel said “i wanna talk to you, i wanna shampoo you, i wanna renew you again and again,” and when she said, “i wanna knit you a sweater, wanna write you a love letter, i wanna make you feel better, i wanna make you feel free.”

[act3s]

https://www.instagram.com/p/BniQJfDlMGp/

[buddingverse]

When i wake up

Its raining.

I close my eyes

And we cry over you.

(like icicles on fingertips)

((fuck it baby you were mine))

[buddingverse]

amalgae

and if you were to smoke me

hold me in your lungs

do you think that maybe

we could fade into the air

and hide between the molecules?

- bruised skins

[buddingverse]

4 hrs

you are not damaged goods, my love,

do not give up on your lungs.

pay no notice to the howls of the wind,

close your ears, ophidian tongues.

and you know I shake too often

but, dear, I will not float away,

hold me close, beneath the lights,

forever, and a day.

[buddingverse]

lingua franca

The salt on my tongue

A sublime, bleary brew

My love,

I dance unsure.

Was it me

or was it you?

[buddingverse]

open

Afraid and unfurling

The threads of my skin

Infinite patterns unlearning

The bloodbaths begin

But washing and raining

And bloody and wound

Are they not all regaining

Life previously consumed?

When torn and when opened,

When raided from pneuma

To be blessed and now sculpted

Organic, shapeless, pupa,

So if the dark juices

Outline you, shall fall

Remember, to be bruised,

Is to learn “free,” from thrall.

As morning, I wake,

To find now: airborne

A repaired, renewed strake.

I have been reborn

[buddingverse]

brittle lines

I took off my shoe

And let her hairs embrace

The skin of my toe

And heard her sing

“You’re home”

 - knelt down to pray

[buddingverse]

this

I missed this

But is this

This

The this

That was

Before?

Or will a new

This

Work fine and

Well

I only know

This this.

A this less sore.

[buddingverse]

[buddingverse]

[buddingverse]

baptism

[buddingverse]

“Stop throwing things, I have to pick them up!”

[buddingverse]

[buddingverse]

Inflated

Absent in absinthe The fingers do not seem to reach The forlorn edges of head Sad, Seul, Humanity, Beseech Nothing is strange In a handful of hair She lives quietly, tucked, Barely, There The marchers are not scheduled, To leave, Brag on, Brag to their infectious Beating, Heaving Cheat Give in to the absolute Provide yourself Endow, Earth's creatures, You will find do not notice Your drunken “Allow”