Good Morning I Like Cheese

im doing my best Hullo there it’s Allyse | she/they (somewhat girl adjacent ✨) | 25

[cartoon-fanaticism]

GLaDOS voice: "Would you like to see some artwork I generated? I've heard from other test subjects that AI-generated artwork produces an uncanny valley response in human viewers because they can't perceive it as fully real. They've told me that it looks absolutely hideous to them, that they can't imagine anything more disgusting than AI art. But, well I've been practicing and wanted your honest opinion. Feel free to let me know how ugly you find this by ranking it on a scale from 'vomit-inducing' to 'eye-bleeding'." A robotic arm lowers from the ceiling holding a hand mirror up to Chell's face

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[mrmeriwether]

I don't know that I've ever seen someone make the Aardman Grimace in real life.

Truly a masterclass in harrowingly strained enthusiasm!

[mattefier-deactivated20221118]

[dreamsy990]

i saw someone say nobody needs to know what a .txt file is anymore. what the fuck is the world coming to

[dreamsy990]

unironically i think we need to bring back computer labs because APPARENTLY some people WERENT taught basic computer literacy and internet safety in school

[dreamsy990]

things about computers/the internet i think kids should be formally taught in schools because theyre important to know and the amount of soon to be grown adults i know who know NOTHING about any of these is quite frankly almost all of them (and resources to learn if you dont know these things, because its never to late to get better with computers)

how to troubleshoot by yourself when you have a technical problem

what common file types are

some very basics on how to use ""developer tools"" on your computer (because i cant think of a better way to refer to them) like task manager and command prompt (and their mac equivalents, terminal and activity monitor ofc)

how to read and understand a privacy policy and what your personal data is, as well as what it being collected actually means and steps you can take to keep it private

how to understand terms of service (hey. if you have trouble with reading legalese and worry about being able to understand these policies anyways, here's a site that gives basic summaries of privacy policies and ToS)

what a cookie actually is

internet privacy and your digital footprint!! seriously i dont know why we stopped teaching people that they shouldnt be putting their entire real identity online in a world where your online actions can ruin you irl

basic safety measures like antivirus software (and why you should use it or if the built in one on windows or mac is enough for you) and backing up your computer (also a mac guide)

common keyboard shortcuts (and on mac)

as an additional note: things i think everyone should know on computers and the internet but schools may bit hesitant to teach about for whatever moral/legal standards schools pretend to operate on

vpns and adblockers! (btw for most of these where you can pay for things im purposefully not recommending any specific software but seriously just use ublock origin for an adblocker)

how to not get a virus while pirating something

what a temporary email is and when to use one

red flags that you shouldn't trust a website (and how to quickly check the security of a site)

what javascript on a website does and how to disable it to get around paywalls

[dreamsy990]

ok one last addition! if you want to take it one level higher, i think learning the very basics of at least one programming language is good for people. it makes computers less scary and it makes you feel very cool, and a lot of people get discouraged about it because it seems overly complicated and hard to learn outside a formal classroom setting, so heres some resources for learning the very basics of python (because i consider it the easiest language to learn and knowing one language will make it easier to learn others)

an online compiler so you dont need to download anything or worry about running code directly on your computer if that makes you nervous

a basic video guide to introduce you to python and walk you through beginner steps

a guide to some syntax and commands you should know (this was literally my lifeline in my first CS class)

some performance tasks to give you things to code to practice and assess yourself

[loulooser]

Can’t wait to not sleep at all on September 11th

[spinostarz]

i know ur from the uk(?) but reading this as an american is really really funny

[loulooser]

why 😭 it’s about twenty one pilots???? Their new album is out sep 12th????

[jarsjam]

THERE'S TWENTY ONE THIS TIME???

[mcapriglioneart]

how to draw arms ? ? 

[swagginsloths]

holy fuck

[shoutsofthunder]

holy fuck is right… but… does it work with legs???

[mcapriglioneart]

yes !!

[empresspinto]

but how much extend

[thunar]

^^^^^^^^^^

[kvothe-kingkiller]

[gabbyzvolt25]

I NEARLY CHOKED

[lifeofcynch]

ENJFDFNFATFVFDF

[deactivated-blog]

finally. i can be accurate

[shiny-charming]

This is too fucking great to not reblog

[wishem]

I give it MASCLES

BIG MACHO

[keithislactoseintolerant-deacti]

🤣🤣

[urhella-gaychloe]

LMAOOOOOO

[fernacular]

Okay but for anyone who legit wants to know how to calculate it correctly:

The elbow joint on average rests a couple inches higher than the navel, so if you measure how long the distance is from the middle of the shoulder to that point then you have the length of the upper and fore arms!

[fernacular]

So if anyone’s wondering about legs too, the simplest rule of thumb is that the length from the top of the leg to the knee is equal to the distance between the top of the leg and the bottom of the pectorals:

And I wanna stress that when i say “top of the leg” i’m not talking about the crotch (please don’t flag me tumblr it’s an anatomical term) i’m talking about the point where the femur connects to the pelvis, which is higher up on the hips:

It’s easier to see what I’m talking about in this photo of a man squatting: 

So yeah if you use that measurement when using this technique you should get fairly realistically proportioned legs:

But remember! messing with proportions is an important and fun part of character design! Know the rules first so you can then break them however you please!

[im-a-hyperion-vault-hunter-deac]

HOW THE HELL DID I FIND THIS POST OMG

[erasaure]

[i-am-corbin-dallas]

Licherally in the midst of drawing a guy and crying at how bad the arms are. Thanks Tumbles

[drrockbell]

I only ever saw the part where people started drawing the limbs outrageously long and genuinely wanted to know how to fix that, so I’m really thankful to see the rest.

[lil-tumbles]

Thank you for the tips, op!

[jabberding0]

Art by Luo Li Rong

[monsterbutch]

this is one of my favorite reddit posts of all time

[formlessdemi]

God forbid Chippy do anything

[randomdeinonychus]

You absolutely must unmute this video.

[boiledegghole]

americans love doxxing their home states more than anything. we hear the name of our home state and everything goes black and we wake up 10 minutes later, having reblogged no fewer than 8 posts featuring the name of our home state

[princessbonecrimes]

h/t to emilyscartoons

[movedclonekisser-deactivated202]

there is no platonic explanation for this. there's no romantic explanation either. frankly they just don't like eachother at all

[movedclonekisser-deactivated202]

there's a sexual explanation though

[jkags-doodles]

Blood of Eden Fancast

Imagine with me, if you will: the year is 2025. The vampire craze of the 2000s is well over. Palomar Pictures, after having the rights to Blood of Eden for over a decade, finally decide to make a movie about it. We wait, with baited breath, for the cast list.

This is what drops.

Brianne Tju (Allison Sekemoto) has an acting history in both TV and film, has played a lot of teen roles, and has starred in multiple horror genres— a few slashers, a comedy horror, and a thriller, where she was one of the antagonists. I feel like this background lends well to the dark romance of Blood of Eden and the moral greyness of Allison Sekemoto, as someone who shows both fear and vulnerability, but also uncontrollable bloodlust. Appearance-wise, I think having an actress with sharper facial features and a generally narrow build fits in well with both her identity as a scavenging, survival-of-the-fittest street kid, and a dexterous and deadly vampire.

Tyler Young (Ezekiel Crosse) doesn't have quite as many roles as many others on this list, and is the only person in this fancast who hasn't played an antagonistic role at one point in his life. Instead, his two major roles— one in a supernatural horror, one in a crime thriller— involve going through the horrors, and being part of a romantic plotline. This is an apt description of Zeke in Blood of Eden, so he fits the bill well. Physically, having someone that is a bit gangly but also has soft muscle works well for Zeke, who is supposed to be physically fit but also struggling to get enough food to eat. And while Zeke is supposed to be blond-haired and blue-eyed, and Tyler is neither of those things, that's what contacts and hair dye is for.

Ben Barnes (Kanin) has a very long list of films and TV shows, and he plays a lot of fantasy roles. In general, he plays stoicism very well, depending on silence and microexpressions, which is ideal for someone like Kanin who's supposed to be unreadable save for in a select number of scenes. Ben Barnes is also good at cutting a regal and imposing figure, has the "dark and mysterious" vibe, and is old enough to be taken seriously and a mentor and father figure to the younger characters.

Wang Ho Xuan (Jackal) is a C-drama actor, and thrived in the role of a sympathetic antagonist. It makes sense for him to thrive similarly in the villain-turned-ally role that Jackal has. As Jackal, he could portray his love of violence, cockiness, his obsessive drive that leads to instability, and the strong emotions to balance out more reserved characters. Visually, the contrast of softer facial features and slender frame with a very sharp smile does well to portray someone who often hides his intentions, and colored contacts can yet again solve the issue of eye color, because there's no way we're getting an actor with naturally yellow eyes.

And lastly, we have James McAvoy (Sarren), who has played many villains throughout his career. If Wang Ho Xuan plays obsessive drive, Ben Barnes plays the stoic antagonist, and Brianne Tju plays a conniving opportunist, I'd say James McAvoy plays the delusion that what he is doing is logical, and what he is doing is right. And that's exactly what Sarren is. Visually, I know Sarren in-book is bald, but I think actually keeping the greying hair with the white streak would be fun. And he's a similar age to Ben Barnes, which further helps them feel like they're contemporaries, while the younger characters aren't on their level.

[bombylius-boy]

I am once again thinking about soup

[ceeturnalia]

why are dudes in fanfic always getting hit with freight train orgasms. why not an orient express orgasm, classy and romantic. where are the shinkansen train orgasms? his orgasm hit him like the TGV atlantique breaking the passenger rail speed record. like the shanghai maglev, his orgasm was a feat of engineering but something of a commercial disappointment.

[elveny]

Don’t tell me delayed orgasms aren’t a thing

[ceeturnalia]

learning new things about the german rail system today

[jkags-doodles]

60 Years Before Blood of Eden

Kanin: sooooooo, I got you those vampires you requested. How's it going? Do you think we'll have a cure and people can leave their houses in the next couple of years? Malachai: Worry not, my leech friend, we have crossbred Red Lung with Rabies! Kanin: wh Kanin: why did you do that.

[tnerdbean]

Know what I’m salty about?

In all my art classes, I was never taught HOW to use the various tools of art.

Like yes, form, and shape and space and color theory and figure drawing is important, but so is KNOWING what different tools do.

I’m 29 and I JUST learned this past month that India Ink is fucking waterproof when it dries. Why is this important? Because I can line something in India Ink and then go over it with watercolors. And that has CHANGED the ENTIRE way I art and the ease I can create with.

tldr: Art Teachers: teach your students what different tools do. PLEASE.

[spookyscaryscouticus]

WAIT INDIA INK JS WATERPROOF ONCE IT DRIES????? THE ENTIRE REASON IVE AVOIDED MARKERS MY ENTIRE LIFE IS BECAUSE JNK BLEEDS AND YOURE TELLING ME INDIA INK IS

F U C K I N G W A T E R P R O O F

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

yall calligraphers out there this is extremely fuckin important if u wanna get into illumination shenanigans because i swear to you there will b discoveries like these^

heres some of mine, pls take with a grain of salt im a total gotdamn amateur:

a lot of the time, the ability for colored ink to bleed will vary wildly WITHIN A SINGLE BRAND OF COLORED INKS. my cobalts bleed like fucking CRAZY compared to my reds, which, when u reference manuscripts that tend to put white ink ON TOP of either red or blue… you see where shit gets real and real annoying. 

u can buy an aeresol, fully transparent workable sealant for like 5-10 dollars at your local art store. when i realize a piece ive been working on needs a color on TOP of a bleed happy ink, i give it a layer of this stuff. trouble is it CAN warp the paper so its important as soon as it dries to use heavy things (paperweights, books) to counteract the paper curling.

ink solvent, like koh i noor’s rapido-eeze, is only compatible with SOME inks, but will work on most acrylics. If you happen to be working with sturdy vellum that you have pre-sealed, it can be possible to literally use ink solvent to wipe away your calligraphy mistake like a goddamn bounty commercial

[sarahlumweejee]

Shit I Learned Working At Dick Blick: 

WD40, found at your local hardware store, will remove Sharpie marker from almost any hard surface. 

 Acrylic inks will show brush strokes in large areas but are waterproof and quick-drying. 

 Acrylic gouache is vivid, fluid, dried matte, is UTTERLY opaque on black paper, handles exactly like watercolor, and is waterproof. 

Putting an oil painting in the sun will turn the yellowed portions back to their original white and wont hurt the painting. 

 Cheap acrylic paintings will bleach out if left in the sun - get UV protectant spray or varnish. Nicer acrylic paints are less prone to sun bleaching, but they still do. Plan accordingly. Oil paints are much less prone to this. 

Solvent-based markers blend together MUSH MORE SMOOTHLY than alcohol-based markers. 

There is an acrylic paint medium for literally every effect you can conceivably think of (fabric paint medium, gloss medium, fluid medium, sand medium, fast-dying/slow-drying medium, etc.). 

 If you’re going to buy student-grade paint to save cash, buy earth-tones (burnt sienna, ochre, etc.); they are made with cheap pigments already, and you wont tell a difference. You WILL tell a difference between student-grade and artist-grade bright colors (all yellows, blues, and reds). 

If you’re working with markers but aren’t using marker paper, you need to switch. Markers don’t blend on printer paper, they just layer (even expensive markers). 

If you want a glass palette for paint mixing but don’t want to shell out the cash, buy a giant picture frame at Goodwill, take the glass out, and electrical tape it to a piece of foam board the same size for stability. 

 Hog bristle brushes are for oil paint, sable brushes are for watercolor, and synthetic brushes are for acrylic and oil (but not watercolor because synthetic bristles can’t absorb water). 

 If you’re going to splurge on any aspect of your creation, splurge on the paper. Get the good stuff - crappy markers/paint/pencils look good on good paper, but not the other way around.  (There is more, but these are the big ticket items)

[stoneybaloneyskeletony]

Some more, also from working at Dick Blick:

- Palette knives are for mixing paint and TRUST ME you want to learn how to use them. When you mix with your brush you loose paint and it’s hard in your brushes.

- DO NOT FIX YOUR ARTWORK WITH HAIRSPRAY. If you’re proud of your work and want to keep it, buy the actual spray fix. Hairspray is not archival in the slightest and will damage your work.

- On top of that, be careful how you store your work. Newsprint is handy and cheap, but also not acid-free and it will yellow your paper. Foamboard? Matboard? Also not always acid-free (but you can get them acid-free).

- There is no food-safe paint. Period. There are lots of ways you can decorate pottery that aren’t glazes, but only glazes are food safe (and even some of those aren’t).

- Also not food safe: Polymer clay (sculpey), air dry clay, oil-based clay, ceramics that have not been glaze fired, oil pastels, sharpie, glues of any kind, or mod podge (even the ‘dishwasher safe’ kind).

- Don’t even get me started on mod podge. It’s not consistent. It’s not archival. It’s not a sealant, it’s a glue (setting aside some of the weird hyper-specific ones they make that I’ve literally never seen in real life).

- If your glue isn’t archival or at least acid-free, don’t use it in your artwork.

- There are so many different kinds of paper out there, just go try them. But also make sure you know if it’s acid-free or not (it probably is).

- Marker paper is usually 15 to 20 lbs. News print is usually 30 to 35 lbs. Tracing paper is usually 25 lbs. Rice paper can range from 20 to 50 lbs. Printer paper is 20 lbs. Vellum paper is usually 48 to 55 lbs. Sketchbook paper is usually 50 to 60 lbs. Drawing paper is usually 70 to 80 lbs. Cardstock can range from 50 to 110 lbs. Charcoal paper is usually 50 to 65 lbs. Pastel paper can range from 70 lbs to board. Bristol paper can range from 50 lbs to board. Mixed media paper can range from 90 to 140 lbs. Printmaking paper can range from lbs 90 to 300 lbs. Watercolor paper can range from 90 to 500 lbs.

- The heavier and rougher the paper is, the more it will absorb. If you’re using a paper too smooth for your medium it will take forever to dry and may smudge. If you’re using a paper too light for your medium, it will warp and curl.

- If you’re working heavily with water, you need to stretch your paper (aka seal down your edges of the paper to a hard, water resistant surface). If you don’t like doing that because it’s a hassle, buy a watercolor block instead of a pad/individual peices.

- If you’re working on a thicker paper, and make a mistake that your can’t erase or cover- you can scrape and/or cut it out! With a really sharp exacto knife, you can very CAREFULLY remove the top layer of paper fibers on most paper.

- DO NOT USE ACRYLIC AS BODY PAINT. It’s plastic.

- If you paint with oil, buy a silicoil jar. It’s the best $10 you’ve ever spent.

- Acrylic paint is basically water-based plastic. It will basically fuse with anything plastic (like a plastic palette), and will not stick to anything oil-based.

- Acrylic paint and house paint are not the same thing and you cannot mix them together. Acrylic paint is made from a water-based acrylic polymer, and house paint is almost always latex and can come both water-soluable and not.

[auressea]

@pamelab has this amazing reference crossed your dash yet?

[thehummingbirdsmatter]

I love when a meme gets so many steps away from its source material that it would be completely incomprehensible if I didn't know what today's date was

[weevilsdaily]

weevil 1163

[viv-psd]

For drawing references 

[@/ALEXbutalsoK on Twitter]