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@bundoru
Why did I make this (x)
this ruins every dramatic cutscene for me
>my pokemon shitpost (shittweet) made it to tumlr
>21,000+ notes
Full Image of Animedia November Issue. (x)
im starting to think this is all some sort of elaborate prank, like they have to be doing this shit on purpose, and are off somewhere at toei hq laughing at our anguish and despair while twirling their evil mustaches and drinking our tears from crystal wineglasses
I might be sad but at least I don’t tell people to kill themselves for shipping fictional characters smh
UST by Kream/UtauReizo
Testing out uploading here because everything I make with Ruko sounds like shit on Soundcloud????? Let’s hope it works here..
This post was triggered by something that @roachpatrol said over here about the expectation for girls to be sweet and clean and harmless:
Holy shit, if I was eight years younger and wandering into fandom for the first time, I can guarantee that the culture right now would’ve fucked me up and ground me down and taken away all my healthy outlets.
Picture: you are a girl at the tender young age of mumbledyteen. Up until this point you have been taught that all dark thoughts are literally hand-delivered into your head by the devil, and that the only correct method of dealing with negativity is to ignore them and pray harder. Concentrate on what is good and righteous and pure to the exclusion of all else, this is how you be a good person.
You are also a fully-functioning human being, one who can feel stressed or lonely or angry or any number of bad things. Mostly, with emotions that are still working themselves out, you feel this rumbling, white-hot white noise under everything, all the time. Sometimes it rolls in like a thunderstorm and everything else gets drowned out, and sometimes it’s only quietly muttering in the distance. Either way it’s always there, and the sound shreds uncomfortably at the inside of your brain.
When you were younger, before you were in charge of your own media consumption, your brain would shred up a myriad of saccharine stories to try and match the noise of the shredder in your head. Bad things happening, people getting hurt, characters trapped in unhealthy relationships of all kinds.
Fanfiction, the product of a hundred thousand other mumbledyteens whose brains are all screaming the same way, makes something in your brain go ping.
Unfortunately, if the planet had ever been united on any single message, it was probably that no matter how you feel: 1) your feelings weren’t unique 2) they didn’t matter 3) they didn’t matter because they weren’t unique, they were shared among millions of hysterical, worthless teenaged girls just like you.
Fandom was confirmation of the first, but (with some hiccups along the way) outright rejection of the last two. Fuck you, our feelings do matter, and this is a story just for us.
A disclaimer: these aren’t good stories, otherwise they wouldn’t have to be defended. Their flavor of topic is not within societally acceptable bounds. Fictional characters have sex and get tortured and raped and abused, but their screaming harmonizes with the pitch of the shredder when it’s burrowing deepest.
As a teenager I never thought that my feelings were important enough to deal with, but these stories let me look at them sideways. Audience catharsis is the whole point of tragedy, after all.
And hell, these days I’m a happy, healthy adult who barely even has the urge to go looking for whump fic when I’ve had a bad week. I’m not going to forget just how much bad stuff that fic helped me air out, though, not ever. (Not to mention that thanks to all of those abuse!fics, I can recognize an unhealthy relationship at 500 paces, even if the fictional abuse was depicted as something loving and romantic. Abusers in real life don’t go around with helpful warning tags on their sleeves anyway.)
But holy shit, can you imagine if I’d found fandom as it is today.
Yes, your church is right, your family is right. Horrible things in stories are only there because they were written by horrible people, and they’re only popular because horrible people read them. The very concepts they address corrupt everything they touch.
That shredder in your head, the one that takes innocent cartoons but then shits out sadness and mayhem? That’s disgusting, you’re disgusting. How dare you think about minors having underaged sex, you minor? How dare you consider another person getting hurt? Your feelings don’t matter, they aren’t unique, they’re shared with all kinds of worthless shitbags just like you.
Every ounce of what you read and write and enjoy is going to be weighed for sin and tested for purity. You know, just like the rest of your life, except this time there’s no deity who’s handing out second chances.
Maybe that’s what bothers me most about all of this. It’s the same petty fandom bullshit as always, but “you’re wrong for liking a ship because IT WILL NEVER BE CANON” is a hell of a lot easier to laugh off when you’re young than “you’re wrong for liking a ship because YOU’RE AN ABUSIVE PEDOPHILE AND IF SOMETHING BAD HAPPENS IT’S YOUR FAULT FOR PERPETUATING IT.”
My fault, my bad thoughts, no outlet for any of them. The message to repress all the bad things so I can look like a good person, but my brain is so full of unprocessed shit that it’s solidified. Nobody actually saved any real children, but my brain sure is getting a second dose of fucked-up.
Are the people getting attacked going to be okay, will they be able to go and address their braingremlins somewhere else? I’d also ask if the people doing the attacking are okay, with all of the denial and repression they must deal with, but it seems like they’ve got venting pretty well handled by taking it out on strangers.
Hey, c’mon, calm down friends. I bet I’ve read a story that’s got a character screaming at just the same pitch you are.
It helps to read one of those and harmonize your voices, I promise.
You know, I just wanted to bring this around again, because I saw someone (a young someone) being vicious and vent-y on a post, and they were clearly coming from a place of pain, but they were also projecting a bunch of confused ideas onto the OP just to have a target for their angry and… you know, I try to be compassionate, but it’s *hard* to remember empathy in the face of knives. Sometimes it’s even hard to figure out what their *goal* is.
And then I thought of your post and I thought: “shredder noise.”
Your post gave me a new metaphor to frame that kind of lashing out, and, in a way, feel better about it. Not like it’s an okay thing to do to people, but like I can understand it better–and maybe because of that understanding I can react more constructively and keep my own brain shredder from joining into the mess.
So thanks for that. :)
Something else that makes me cringe? People who think they’re irregularly dark. You know the type.
“I’m not like normal girls lol I read the wikipedia page on Bundy! I’ve got such dark fascinations.” “I guess I’m such a twisted person, I watch horror movies for FUN!”. “Haha unlike other girls….I LIKE night time!” “I know who cthulu is so im basically satanic, I bet my mom would be so shocked!!!”. “I reblogged one picture of a skull, so yeah you could say I’m morbid >:3” “I’m insaaane!!! The dark depths of my soul would scare anyone”
Like come on am I the only one who gags at this stuff
tbh i really dont like it too a lot of the time but on another hand i feel like i often fall into the category lmfao
well if you think about it, it’s kind of fucked up that girls absorb this notion of what girls are supposed to be like that’s so sweet and so clean and so harmless and so pleasant, that young teens genuinely judge themselves to be crazy or freakish for their totally normal human interests in horror, crime, and monsters. it takes them until their late teens and twenties to have the maturity and self-confidence to realize that these are normal human interests that lots of other women share.
Pokemon: “There are no guns in the Pokemon world… we don’t believe in portraying a world of violence. All conflict is expressed through ultimately harmless Pokemon battles. We’ve censored the early episodes that did include firearms and refuse to include them in the future.”
Digimon:
loss.jpg but it keeps getting faster
[maki voice] I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to kill your partners today but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn’t be mixing alcohol and caffeine.
This Woman’s Cakes Are Almost Too Satisfying To Look At
Really nice recipes. Every hour.
Show me what you cooked!
Metalgreymon!
if youre ever under the impression that your fandom cant be that bad just go on its confessions blog and watch everything you love fall apart before your eyes
Meimei totally gets it! You’re just bothering her!
YOU THOUGHT IT WAS THE KAISER
BUT IT WAS ME,
GENNAI
WHERE! IS! KEN!
I’M SO MAD I ALWAYS COMFORTED MYSELF WITH THE THOUGHT THAT AT LEAST KEN IS IN TRI AND THEN I FIND OUT MY CHILD ISN’T EVEN MY CHILD