"AND HOW CAN THIS BE?"

what's up. there's a vampire here. you know which one. I'm not a minor and you better not be either. this is my personal blog and it's not really tagged or curated. let me be a freak in peace. i've been on tumblr for a full decade now and i'm tired. I've got a spark in my eye though do not fear. My gender is a lot more complicated than I can give you in the form or pronouns. I don't have time to get into all that. use any of them tbh. what's far more important is that I'm hot. read all my posts while mentally picturing me as really hot and that'll suffice. okay all set. let's rock and roll.

[amphibianshaped]

apparatus

[iwannabeaswampwitch]

Lots of drama in our household

[json-derulo]

fool me once shame on you. fool me twice shame on me. fool me three times this has gotta be a sex thing for at least one of us

[tenowls]

MUCH TO THINK ABOUT...

[sals-sonic]

I love you ao3, I love you dead dove, I love you dark and fucked up ships, I love you weird and unusual kinks, I love you porn without plot, I love you unapologetic violent fiction, I love you horror, I love you splatterpunk, I love you unreliable narrators, I love you morally gray characters, I love you characters with no morals whatsoever, I love you authors that write whatever you want, I love you authors who don't stop others from writing whatever they want, I love you readers with critical thinking skills, I love you media literacy

[gonzocoded]

don’t ever kill your self because maybe someday you will get brunch with your tumblr mutual

[yeehawpim]

having a ponder about being aromantic and the kinds of friendships or qprs I might want to have

[csny]

this is sort of sickening to me. can they swap

[saurons-advice]

Who is this club loves psychosexual tortureeeeeeeeee!!!! Can I get a HEEEEELLL YEAAAAH? A YIPPEE for psychosexual torture? Can I get a WOOOOOOOO? A little bit of WOOOOOHOOO?

[saurons-advice]

A word of advice: eat as much lettuce as possible

[willgrahamscock]

*in a jigsaw trap* yeah so, do you mind if we reschedule this? it's just i'm not really feeling it today sorryyy

[willgrahamscock]

the whole things just giving me anxiety haha

[willgrahamscock]

no worries if not though!!!

[skelliefrankie]

[spicyraeman]

another classic blorbos lazing around post from me again

[dynamicdiscoverybureau]

Should these two become roommates?

They'd be great roommates.

They'd survive living together.

Someone is breaking the lease.

Someone isn't making it out alive.

Remaining time: 7 hours 25 minutes

[ace-disaster-weeb]

OK Who's dying

Hannibal Lecter

Lestat de Lioncourt

Remaining time: 14 hours 57 minutes

Place your bets here

[bobdylanyaoi]

its interesting how the people who say "my trauma made me funny" are never actually funny just uncomfortably self-deprecating

[the-quasar-hero]

We all got that one mutual that be going through the most treacherous situations a person could endure and then posting a few minutes later about why such and such should get fucked through a concrete wall.

[the-quasar-hero]

Mutual: my situationship partner just got caught in a tornado at a broken glass factory where they were cheating on me with my landlord who just increased my rent by 6000% and my pet marmot has a disease so rare they’re naming it after him and all my bones are becoming apricot jelly which I’m allergic to.

Same mutual 16 minutes later: Do you think Ronald McDonald and the Burger King ever explored each other’s bodies?

[silvaurum]

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

[silvaurum]

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

[silvaurum]

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

[fallout-lou-begas]

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