NASTY THINGS, ADVENTURES

Ring-winner, luck-wearer; barrel-rider; master burglar; thief in the shadows; he who walks unseen. // Independent roleplay account for    Bilbo Baggins, written by Kimmi. Tracking: burglarbilb0

[aquacitys]

bilbo “what the fuck is an arkenstone” baggins

[chxmomiletea]

   Dori didn’t need telling twice; he turned tail and ran, pushing Ori in front of him and reaching over to grab hold of Bilbo to help him keep up.

[burglarbilb0-blog]

    His three-foot body is snatched, and raised above ground     in Dori’s efforts to help him, and Bilbo holds his breath as     the dwarf flings him with urgency onto his back. He could     have sworn the Orcs had been much further behind than     that, but a few of the scouts could have easily slipped past     the company unnoticed.               “---How did they catch up with us so fast?”

[burglarbilb0-blog]

         “I think, perhaps, it would be wise to                       -----RUUUUUUUUUUN!”

[burglarbilb0-blog]

PSA;;

Soooo it’s about time that I actually said this, rather than just being inactive without any sort of warning or note -- I’ve lacked a muse on here for a while, now, and my interest in roleplay seems to have dipped a lot. So here’s an official announcement that this blog is ON HIATUS for an undecided amount of time... I’ll be back, probably. But for now please be patient with me.  Bye for now, friends! Take care, and stay safe. Much love xx

[of-earth-and-stone-blog]

[jiminfilter]

[oakenbaggins]

[burglarbilb0-blog]

bilbo looking at thorin

[kateswann]

my partner tried to call me a sweetheart the other day but he misspelled it and I read it as “sweetbeard” and then I decided that this is what dwarf couples call each other

so, naturally, here are two dwarves on a date

[burglarbilb0-blog]

Random texts.

[ text ]: I'm drunk on lemonade.

[ text ]: A book told me to bathe in milk. I have regrets.

[ text ]: Help. I'm stuck in [insert name here]'s house and they won't let me leave.

[ text ]: Last night, I used 7 champagne glasses to empty an orange juice carton and drank none of them.

[ text ]: I accidentally sexted my mom.

[ text ]: Why is my TV in the back hard.

[ text ]: I can't find my phone.

[ text ]: Sorry about calling you for pizza last night. I got you and the delivery number mixed up.

[ text ]: I got prank called that my cat was in the freezer but I don't have a cat and I'm scared.

[ text ]: Don't be alarmed. There's a pretty angry cat in your apartment.

[ text ]: I don't know who you are but I want pizza.

[ text ]: Do you have my dog?

[ text ]: A Disney princess dress arrived today. When did I order it?

[ text ]: All I have in my fridge is eggs.

[ text ]: THERE IS A STRANGER IN MY HOME and xhe is politely asking for beer.

[ text ]: All my underwear is gone.

[ text ]: I just got mistaken for a porn star.

[ text ]: Who's house am I in?

[ text ]: I've been waiting for three hours and you're still in the bathroom.

[ text ]: I have a collection of stolen doorknobs.

[ text ]: Police just asked me where you are. You should hide.

[ text ]: I think you underestimated the power of vodka. You told me that rainbows were a conspiracy.

[ text ]: I wish I was a unicorn sometimes.

[ text ]: The sky was green for like a second. fite me.

[ text ]: You were so drunk last night that you hit on your reflection.

[ text ]: I think we need to talk about last night.

[ text ]: Pack your bags. Surprise road trip.

[ text ]: Remind me to never drink again.

[ text ]: Someone stole my table and only my table.

[ text ]: There's a huge ass hole in my couch. It's bigger than my butt.

[ text ]: All my pasta is gone and I can't find it.

[ text ]: When will my dignity return from war.

[ text ]: Apparently 'mmm watcha say' isn't funny anymore.

[ text ]: In not brubk yuu ate.

[ text ]: sleap wwat evn os sleeo

[ text ]: auto cucumber is bae

[hpctter-deactivated20161030]

                      ❝ bilbo baggins… strange name.  ❞

                              stranger creature. the young wizard tried not to stare,                             he was as tall as a child. and he mentioned dwarves and –  

                             ❝ wizard ?? what’s his name ??  ❞

[burglarbilb0-blog]

           Strange? There was nothing strange about his name. It had been                inherited; and proudly, at that. The halfling blinks, a little taken aback                and admittedly a little insulted. But the stranger could help him, here.                So Bilbo decided that he had better jump at the chance.                              “---Mm? Gandalf. He’s good with fireworks...?”

[exodxs]

HELPFUL GUIDE ON WHAT THE TERM “I ONLY RP WITH MUTUALS” MEANS it means: i only rp with people that are following me, and i also follow them.

here’s a step-by-step tutorial on how to figure out if we’re mutuals.

1. are you following me? if yes, then we’re halfway there! 2. am i following you? if yes, then we’re done!! we’re     mutuals!! we can rp!! feel free to send me asks,     make starters, or plot with me ooc.

am i not following you? then, we’re not mutuals, and i will not interact with you. please stop asking.

the more you ask will just irritate me more, and provokes things such as this incredibly sarcastic post.  i’m deeply sorry, but if i don’t follow you, i'm NOT going to interact with you. it’s simple as that. thank u for ur time

[samwwise]

last shots

[dxrins]

         “Now he talks, I see,” Thorin teases, though he does dare to lift the hobbit a               little higher before settling him back down upon his hairy little feet. The notion to               throw him over his shoulder had crossed Thorin’s mind, but he’s no fool, and               would rather have the hobbit’s affection than his rage.          “Settle down, I cannot stay for long, and I wish to enjoy the little time I can spend               with you. My duties leave me with little time to write or travel.”

[burglarbilb0-blog]

       The halfling dares to break a smile here --- even at the mention of his lover leaving again           so soon. Sometimes, he grows so used to him being away that the misery of them being           apart takes a while to leave. It’s then that it dawns on him how rude he and how completely           -- awfully grumpy he had been. As he’s placed onto the floor and turns to meet the dwarf’s           eye, the smile stays on his lips.                    “Our time together is always so short lived, and I often forget that fact once it hits.                     But here you are, clear as day --- in fact really here again. Company is a pitiful                     daydream when you’re away. I’ve been focused on that, and for that I’m sorry.”

[ramblingfanarts]

Wanted to contribute a little something to the anniversary. And really just wanted happy cuddles okay?

[radioproxy]

Bilbo ‘Little Bunny’ Baggins

[radioproxy]

Thorin can’t handle the cuteness

[leannacrossan]

“The quest stands upon the edge of a knife. Stray but a little and it will fail. But hope remains, if friends stay true.”

[burglarbilb0-blog]

PSA;

;; Sorry for not being around on this blog that much lately, I’ve lost Bilbo somewhere and he doesn’t seem to want to be found. Feel free to send in memes I’ve reblogged, or even just a starter prompt or plot request. Hopefully it’ll be the little things that bring back my muse.  But until then, I’ve got a 12 hr night shift Thursday night so I won’t be around too much until the weekend. So take care, loves. I’ll be lurking here, or over here. You’ll all be missed <3