fashion addicted

5'6 | sw 130lbs | cw 127 | gw 110lbs

[butterflysandcoffee]

She is so pretty I want to cry...

[butterflysandcoffee]

Tw ED

I can't restrict these past days. If I don't eat I am nauseous or get migraines. Two days ago it wad so bad I was vomiting the whole morning and I don't know what to do. This bs always starts when I heavy restricting again and I haaaate it. Like I don't even feel hunger but I can't function as a normal human being if I keep feeling extremly sick all the time...

[butterflysandcoffee]

Went to sushi all you can eat and still stayed under 1000 calories. Happy and feeling good.

Also huge Bonus: my boyfriend bought me Roses and said he Supports me with losing weight as long as I promise to not completely starve myself. <3

[butterflysandcoffee]

Today was a really shitty day for me. I was supposed to go out for v-day but my license plate was stolen?! The only good thing is I lost 2lbs and only ate salad the whole day.

Currently thinking about doing a salad diet. Does anyone has experience with that?

[butterflysandcoffee]

Just had a meltdown and told my boyfriend everything about my restrictions and unhealthy behaviours.

We ended up fighting about it and I just feel so exhausted.

I know he wants me to be save but I just can't fight my relapse this time.

[butterflysandcoffee]

My struggle with ana:

Sometimes I wish I could be someone else. Someone prettier, smarter, more likeable.

I always hope losing weight could help me become a model and prove to myself that I am enough. Sadly most days i end up realising that my problems are internally and that I probably won't ever be happy.

Obsessing over my weight/appearance feels like the only thing keeping me sane and I hate it.

I wish I could just be happy.

[butterflysandcoffee]

[butterflysandcoffee]

I love the elegance of these models

[butterflysandcoffee]

Tw ed

The worst thing about having an ed is the fact that you can be miles away from your goal but still be dying.

It's been 7+ years for me and literally two of my Organs are dying but I can't stop starving myself. Like i have this stupid idea of reaching my goal weight and literally no plans in life after that.

[butterflysandcoffee]