C. F. Lindsey

Yes.

[c-f-lindsey]

You know what

I’ll just fuck off

[c-f-lindsey]

Lays talking about me stabbing her in the back

I have no idea what’s going on anymore

Like wtf

I went to bed as soon as I went home

I have no idea what happened after my eyes closed at 7:30 Monday night

[c-f-lindsey]

My best friend is mad at me

I mean yes

I snapped when I got home

But I apologized

I had a reason

Apparently having a reason makes it 10x worse

Like for fucks sake

I acknowledged what happened

I’ve been thinking about it all day

I apologized twice

What am I supposed to do about you still being pissed

[c-f-lindsey]

Apparently having a migraine is illegal in our household now

So I guess I’m sleeping the garage or my old room

Where the migraine will progressively get worse

[clinical-manners]

*places an orange just outside a fairy ring to see what comes out* science is more of an art than a science

[theunfairfolk]

*the orange grows legs and skitters away*

[clinical-manners]

Fascinating results *places a banana in the same spot*

[kingscrown666]

*clawed hand reaches out of the ether and drags it into the ring, leaving ragged claw marks in the soil as it disappears, back into the ether from whence it came*

[numberlover1729]

“let’s go to the extreme.” *places a pineapple in the same spot*

[yallidarityforever]

Real scientists would keep putting an orange in the same spot to make sure the results are consistent before moving on to other fruits or different spots.

[clinical-manners]

The only valid response to this post.

[elodieunderglass]

We’re working up the complexity levels of fruit until we feel there is enough evidence to support the judicious placement of a volunteer twink

[cannibal-cupcakes]

[elodieunderglass]

You sit down, we haven’t seen what’s happened to the pineapple

[lynati]

This is Tumblr; we’ve ALL seen what happened to the pineapple. O_O

[anxietyproblem]

[cloacacarnage]

i know its the mets, but this is the coolest shit i’ve ever seen a human being do

[futureblackwakandan-deactivated]

Wtf????

[theryanproject]

Smoove with it too 

[meqabitch-deactivated20200901]

This is the kind of shit you see in anime that shows that a certain character is stronger than other characters. 

[bankuei]

“Pathetic.  You can’t even hold the bat you dare step to the plate? Have you no respect for the sport?”

[pardonmewhileipanic]

reminds me of this gif

[sueanoi]

[batter-sempai]

Baseball players are to be feared

[cynosurecosplay]

[thenamesdede]

Reblogging for the last one

[saito-91]

^Same for me

[amuzed1-deactivated20241106]

They just kept getting progressively more “woah”

[scp2008]

much woah

[lord-blongus]

Oh my god this is a lucky universe

[cleoselene-deactivated20260315]

every time this post comes around, my favorite part is the “I know it’s the Mets” qualifier at the beginning lmao like how baseball that this zillion note posts starts with “sorry for putting this hellteam on your dash, bUT”

[lostspirit101]

Y’all have no idea how hard I was trying not to laugh in class at that poor bird

[wazimoomoo]

They…they just blew up a fucking bird…

[greatcomputerearthquake]

Ball’s dead. Bird’s dead. I’m dead

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[shyflops]

personally my favorite thing about Mr. Bird Evaporator is this imagine being the poor fool tryna rob this man’s house only to be instantly transported to the same dimension as that bird

[westiec]

He does photography now, and I guess just in case you’re booking him wondering “is it that Randy Johnson?” … here’s his logo:

[headspace-hotel]

Y'all ever get so excited about a scientific paper you're reading that you get chills???

So I thought to myself

Huh, a lot of our invasive species come from China and Japan

And then I thought, huh, I should look up what Kudzu is like in its natural habitat

And I found this article by a team of scientists investigating the history of Kudzu in China

And ohhhhh my goddddd. I'm vibrating with excitement over how cool this is.

The first bombshell that turned my brain inside out:

KUDZU IS NOT WILD. IT IS SEMI-DOMESTICATED.

In China, Kudzu has been a fundamentally important plant for food and textiles throughout history. We have Kudzu cloth that is 6,000 years old!

THIS PLANT CLOTHED AND FED ONE OF THE MOST POPULOUS AND MOST ENDURING HUMAN CULTURES ON EARTH

and in turn

HUMANS SHAPED AND SELECTED FOR ITS TRAITS

*AND*

in its natural range, humans are the main "predator" of kudzu

"Harvest by humans appears to be the major control mechanism in its native areas."

Kudzu is like that because it co-evolved with humans.

WHAT

[headspace-hotel]

YALL

This means

That Kudzu is so highly invasive because—just like most plants evolved to be grazed by herbivores and/or eaten by caterpillars, keeping them in balance with everything else—Kudzu basically evolved to be harvested by humans

The other half of the ecological partnership that keeps Kudzu in balance with everything else isn't a caterpillar or a hoofed beast. It's us.

[c-f-lindsey]

I love how when humans are running from bees

My cat is just like

To hell with you

*smack*

[c-f-lindsey]

Those of you filing for unemployment. Please, do not be overly frustrated or angry at the state employees when you file and nothing happens for a while. They have to process your claim for a period of time.

Also, take this into consideration.

Is your state backed up with the amount of unemployment claims?

It’s probable.

[c-f-lindsey]

[c-f-lindsey]

[c-f-lindsey]

[clevermanka]

Original tweet

[c-f-lindsey]

Quotes by my bestie

[c-f-lindsey]

“Mother fucking fucker”

[c-f-lindsey]

“How many hoses do they have??”

“As many has my manwhore’s apparently.”

[c-f-lindsey]

Quotes by my bestie

[c-f-lindsey]

“Mother fucking fucker”

[c-f-lindsey]

Quotes by my bestie