🌹

coffee • books • journal • calligraphy • poetry • flowers

[perfectquote]

“In the end you can’t always choose what to keep. You can only choose how you let it go.”

— Ally Condie

[ca-createart]

[feral-ballad]

Blythe Baird, from If My Body Could Speak; “Concerns from a hot-boxed jeep”

[Text ID: “How do I stop / carrying everything / that had ever / happened to me?”]

[flowerais-deactivated20211031]

one day you will feel a warm little blue sky and flower fields in your heart

[caffeinatedrose]

I deactivated my facebook..AGAIN.

This time I will do my best not to reinstall it, I have been spending too much of my time on my social media that I barely do anything. I will get off instagram and Twitter for atleast a week i guess

I will focus more on the important things from now on and start studying for my international professional license!

[caffeinatedrose]

Today's To-Do:

- Breakfast

- Clean room

- Coffee

- Read

- Lunch

- Bath

- Read

- Dinner

- Read

- Skincare

- Sleep

*with intake of water inbetween

[caffeinatedrose]

3/7

Okay. I will call it a cheat day from my socmed detox. I downloaded my social media apps and posted, once.

I will delete them again on the 4th day and promise to be productive since it is also my day off.

So far, it feels good and I realized I can really be more productive without social media. Step by step into using social media less or not at all and focusing on the more important things 😌

I might also go back to my creative hobbies (journaling and calligraphy, might also try watercolor painting again) 🤍

[caffeinatedrose]

2/7

did not open any social media apps today and it felt peaceful.

i might sleep early tonight too because I did not drink coffee at all today 😌

I also started reading 'The Book Thief'

[caffeinatedrose]

1/7

I must say i find it hard to not check my socmeds. I uninstalled fb, ig, and twitter but I still end up checking twitter and ig on safari 🤦🏻‍♀️

I will take a nap and maybe read and journal again starting tonight 🤍

[caffeinatedrose]

Social Media Detox:

I have realized that I have been spending too much time scrolling through facebook, instagram, and tiktok that it is basically what I do all day on my day offs.

It also makes me feel insecure and I think it is finally affecting my mental health and productivity at home.

I have decided to deactivate my facebook and delete my instagram and tiktok. I just need messenger since it is mainly our way to communicate now for personal and work stuff. As for twitter, I think I will use it instead of fb and ig 🤔

[flowerais-deactivated20211031]

How to love yourself

take up space like you’re meant to be here. don’t hide yourself or disappear. you’re not a waste of space. anyone who says so does not have the right.

when you see yourself in the mirror, don’t avoid your gaze. see yourself the way a friend would. see the stories in your imperfections. things that should stay hidden to one can be endearing and special to another. be the another for yourself.

as Mary Oliver said, you do not have to be good. you only need to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. you are not a object to be measured daily and ruthlessly compared. you’re your own star among billions, but those who see you will appreciate your light. 

unconditional acceptance and forgiveness of everything you’ve ever done. 

never expect so much of yourself that you’re always falling short. It’s impossible to live this way and love yourself. starting somewhere is brave. small achievements can mean the most.

never let your self worth fall into someone else’s hands, especially if you love them. your worth is inherent and everlasting, and isn’t so mutable that someone can come along and alter it.

find your inner child, and love them more than you’ve loved anyone else. let yourself cry, let yourself explore, let yourself make mistakes, let yourself play. you need to grant yourself this freedom. no one else will.

be the best friend, comfort or therapist you’ve always needed. when you’re awake at midnight with no one to confide in, be there for yourself. you will always be there for you. 

give yourself more chances. to start again, to try again, to love again, to open up again. your past doesn’t have to be painted on you forever. you can start again, whenever you please.

[yousaveeveryonebutwhosavesyou]

[deadbyinsidee]

[yousaveeveryonebutwhosavesyou]

[caffeinatedrose]

I lay awake at night and think about how this fleeting over the cloud feeling will be gone soon.

[spendingalifetimeinthebackground]

“Am I that boring? What is it? Everyone I talk to just ends up leaving shortly after. Everyone seems to be vague to me, I have to do all the chatting just to keep on getting blunt answers. I give up. I’m truly meant to be and speak with me and myself only.”

—

[flowerais-deactivated20211031]

soft reminder: you’re alive. you survived the worst nights you’ve ever experienced. you picked yourself up when you were at rock bottom. you made it through the worst relapses, loneliness, heartbreak, failure and darkness in your life. when you wanted to disappear you stayed, time and time again. you can make it through anything. you will get through this too.