Dr.House

[callme-drhouse]

Do I really have to give the whole run down? It’s a bloody ask blog you guys know what you’re doing.

Oh you want RULES? That’s a bloody first, who actually ever wants RULES anyway? Whatever , the only rules you will get from me is, don’t interrupt me, don’t ask me stupid things, and don’t bother me about personal stuff. It’s really simple, now leave me alone already so I can take some Vicodin.

Hope the door hits you on the way out

Asks in inbox: 15

This is an 18+ blog. The contents aren't for you’re young ones. I mean it, actually monitor what your little goblins are watching, enough of them grow up to be dumb enough to end up on a hospital bed. And to be frank? I don’t want to waste my time doing check ups on little timmy. 🔞

Blogs House interacts with. (Will be edited daily)

@james-wilson-oncology

[callme-drhouse]

House! Interesting psych case, figured you'd probably be the only one smart enough to solve it *sarcasm

-Nonius Argyros, Head of the psych department

“Are you a psychologist.. mocking my heavily implied neurodivergence?” He said feigning offense. “Cause news flash, I can see the sarcasm. In fact- sarcasm? It’s kind of my thing.” He said over dramatically. “Now are you going to give me the details or just stand there?”

[callme-drhouse]

“Wow, thanks. That image is very life changing. in fact, seeing it was a great way to spend 5 seconds of my life Instead of downing a bottle of Molly and taking my motorcycle out for a spin.”

[callme-drhouse]

“Times like these, I consider faking my death to avoid interactions just like this one, or literally any other interaction.”

[callme-drhouse]

dr. zaddy if you will ; )

“I will not. Cause apparently I’m not allowed to get spicy in the workplace, boring isn’t it? After all, being surrounded by the sick and dying is romance 101.”

[callme-drhouse]

Do you ever think the sky is trying to tell us something and we as a society can't understand it anymore?

“If it is, the sky needs to stop being cryptic. People are too stupid these days to decipher puzzles. And either way, I wouldn’t care. I don’t LIVE to think about LIVING, I live because frankly, I don’t have a choice. Plus, I have other REAL problems to think about rather than making up random new ones.”

[callme-drhouse]

What's your favourite animal? :)

(She says, with joy and hope and whimsy)

Mine's a fox :D

“My favorite animal are rats. They aren’t against eating other dead animals or garbage to survive.”

[callme-drhouse]

Why haven’t i ever meet an 18 year old doctor

“It takes way longer to get all the necessary credentials. If you meet an 18 year old doctor they haven’t done all the proper medical training.”

[callme-drhouse]

thong

“Not on me, no. Maybe go ask Wilson, he probably has one.”

[callme-drhouse]

House! Interesting psych case, figured you'd probably be the only one smart enough to solve it *sarcasm

-Nonius Argyros, Head of the psych department

“Are you a psychologist.. mocking my heavily implied neurodivergence?” He said feigning offense. “Cause news flash, I can see the sarcasm. In fact- sarcasm? It’s kind of my thing.” He said over dramatically. “Now are you going to give me the details or just stand there?”

[callme-drhouse]

Do you need a team for doing all the boring doctor stuff you don't wanna do?

“Exactly! Good job for catching on so quickly, here’s a gold star or whatever.” He slaps a star sticker to the anons face. “Any other brilliant observations?” He sarcastically asked.

[callme-drhouse]

hey king are you paying your rent this month? please say yes 🙇🏻🙇🏻🙇🏻 - Max (your roommate if you want, @221b-bitchinstreet )

“Rent? Have you ever heard of this little DIY called Tax fraud?”

[callme-drhouse]

*Throws bag of gummy sharks at you before skedaddling away.*

“Well- that was something. These better be drugged or my Christmas is going to be terribly boring once I do, eat these.” He stared at the gummies.

[callme-drhouse]

I could take both of you <3 -August

“What do you want me to say? Congratulations? Being a whore isn’t exactly a badge of honor. At least that’s what I’m told.”

@james-wilson-oncology

[callme-drhouse]

You only want to see Wilson’s boobies there’s no point alerting you to anyone else’s

“If you weren’t aware- Wilson has this terrible birth defect. Called flat chest syndrome. Truly saddening isn’t it?”

@james-wilson-oncology

[callme-drhouse]

do you like mlp (gen 5)

“Sure, yeah. Love sparkle-dash and apple-ass or whatever. Now am I done here? Answering these questions is starting to feel an awful lot like clinic duty. And if you couldn’t tell... I don’t like clinic duty.”

[callme-drhouse]

You left your jacket in my office -Dr. Jones, Head of Psychology

“....and? What? You want me to walk over there and get it? What about the fact I’m crippled? You’re not going to make the crippled walk, are you?”