Calvin Watches Stuff

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Calvin Reacts to Overwatch: “Doomfist Origin Story”

Well, here we are with another installment of a liveblog I almost thought wouldn’t continue! ...what? No, not Miraculous Ladybug; I mean Overwatch! Yep, there’s a new animated short out, and it’s a doozy: this time we’re finally getting introduced to Doomfist, a character I’ve heard referenced a number of times before but without any real context. Well, let’s see if he was worth the hype! 

Well, based on these newspaper articles, this seems to take place after most of the previous episodes. And based on the entire building shaking, it also seems that shit is about to go down.

WAIT WHAT

HOLY SHIT THIS ART

Okay, so I guess this is the Overwatch anime now.

Did they change Tracer’s voice actress for this? She sounds different to me, although admittedly she’s not saying much.

So here we get our first good look at Doomfist himself. He’s…basically what I was expecting, actually: a giant guy with a big-ass murder glove.

Ah, so I guess this battle’s happening in the past, and now he’s breaking out of prison in the present. Got it.

Damn, Genji got wrecked!

Holy SHIT that was cool! So he’s not just incredibly powerful; he also appears to be incredibly smart. I mean, he instantly identified Tracer’s totally-not-an-arc-reactor as her main weakness.

Ah, but now you have WINSTON to deal with.

And of course now he’s escaping in the present. 

Well, that was a pretty cool episode actually! I have to say, I really like this guy’s style. Personally I can’t see him adding a ton of new layers to the game’s strategy (albeit said as someone who has played the game exactly zero times), but it’s always nice to get new lore. See you next time, and expect some Homestuck content tomorrow! 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

“Calvin Watches Stuff” announcement

Hey guys, Golden Keyblade here. Sorry for being gone so long; the summer has been a lot busier than I expected and also I discovered the Zero Escape trilogy and have been binging that for the last week or so. In regards to the writing half of the Omniverse Event, I can’t really give any updates yet (although at least one story should be updating fairly soon). As for the liveblogging...well, I have good news and bad news. 

The bad news is, “Calvin Watches Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V is officially cancelled. I’m sorry guys; I want to watch that series, and I will, but I can’t do that if I have to stop the video every five seconds to jot down notes about it. Liveblogging a series like that just...sucks all the fun out of it, for me and most likely for the viewer. If I had the software necessary for a reaction YouTube channel, that might be a different story, but I’m afraid this is the end for now. 

I don’t want to dwell on the bad news, so let’s hear some good news! For one thing, I’m doubling down on the Homestuck liveblogging from here on out. That blog is now my/Calvin’s main priority, so head on over to @calvinreadshomestuck to check it out! I guarantee you’ll be amused by some of the upcoming content. I’m also not abandoning this blog altogether; as I’ve said, I’ll definitely be liveblogging Season 2 of Miraculous Ladybug (whenever the hell it comes out). And keep your eyes peeled for a certain other reaction coming out later today; those of you who’ve followed my content for a while should be able to guess what it is. 

Sorry again to disappoint you guys, but let’s face it: at the speed I go, ARC-V was never going to get finished; and honestly, I just kind of want to WATCH it, without having to stop every few seconds. See you guys on the Homestuck liveblog, or later today for that certain special reaction! 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Liveblogging update

Hey, it’s been a while since I made a liveblog post. Sorry about that; I’ve been feeling out of it recently. Here’s a little update about how each of my series’ are doing: 

Homestuck: This one is definitely still happening, slowly but surely. I’ll do some pages tonight, and I should finish off Act 1 in the next few days. 

Invader Zim: I’m officially cancelling this series. I honestly just wanted to get to “A Room With a Moose”; now that I’ve witnessed that masterpiece, I’ll watch the rest of the series on my own. 

Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V: Again, more content coming very soon. I can also tell you to expect a VRAINS liveblog to follow it. Sorry again for slacking on this one. 

Miraculous Ladybug: I’m ready when you’re ready, Astruc. 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 15: “A Room With A Moose”

Alright, story time. 

When I was deciding whether or not to liveblog this show, I had Hobbes look up clips from the show. Specifically, I told him to find one line, completely out of context, to show me in hopes of convincing me to watch. The line he came out with I found to be so utterly bizarre, and so perfectly delivered, that I had to watch the series. And I believe this is the episode from which the line originates. 

Let’s find out. 

…let us begin.

And we start by reaffirming that little kids are indeed awful.

Huh. I wouldn’t have thought Dib would be so petty.

For the first time in my life, I’m now interested in hearing a school lecture in full. I want to know what the fuck they were saying that involved cannibalism.

“MY BUSINESS…IS DONE!” Oh, this is gonna be good.

Well, this isn’t suspicious at all.

“Miss Bitters, I have a MIGHTY NEED!!! to use the restroom once again.” Have I mentioned how much I fucking love this dialogue?!

“LEAVE NO EVIDENCE!!!” You know, I kind of figured that line was from here. Either way, I’m definitely shouting this every time I delete my log files in Hacknet from now on.

I love the eye twitch; it’s the perfect reaction to something like this.

SUDDENLY SPACE BUS

“Launching you into space is just Phase 1 of my plan!” I admit, I was not expecting one of Zim’s plans to have a Phase 2. He’s really stepped up his game on this one.

Ooh, and there’s a Phase 3 now! Interesting.

“But I chose this particular wormhole especially for the occasion.” Oh PLEASE tell me this is it. Please tell me the destined line has finally arrived.

“You see, at the end of this wormhole lies…A ROOM…WITH A MOOSE!!!!!”

Close the Internet. We’re done. Nothing is ever going to top this line for pure comedic value.

“PREPARE YOUR BLADDER FOR IMMINENT RELEASE!” …I fucking love this show.

And now the moose is eating walnuts, and for some reason Dib is fucking terrified of it.

Well this is certainly out-of-place music.

Yeah, kind of figured that was how it would go down.

“THE MOOSE HAS FAILED MEEEEEEE!!!” Never change, Zim.

That was just as amazing as I thought. 

Okay, now we’re done for the day. Probably for the week, who knows. 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 15: “Big Bad Rubber Piggy”

The absolute peak of “What even is that title”. 

Ah, so here we have Professor Membrane’s show again! Why is the name on-screen completely different from the one the announcer guy just said? SCIENCE, that’s why!!

I’m not entirely sure how a question about “breakfast chunks” (ugh, I refuse to ask) became one about time travel, but whatever; anything to lead into this episode’s plot, I guess.

I admit, this is a take on time travel I’ve certainly never encountered before.

“Like this giant fish in a bear suit! He would be horrible!” Yeah, that’s pretty horrible alright.

And of course Zim just got finished building such a device.

Oh look, it’s the Hunter-Destroyer Machine! I was wondering when that was going to show up.

So this is what it looks like when a robot tries to grasp a paradox. I can see why GLaDOS tried to do it to Wheatley; by that point in the game, it would have been very satisfying.

Ah, so that’s where the rubber piggy comes into this.

Well this is certainly interesting: an episode all about the butterfly effect. I’m intrigued to see where this goes.

GIR’s attachment to the rubber pigs is both adorable and hilarious.

I really like this premise for an episode, though I think it would be even cooler if Dib also had one of these devices. A real-time battle of retroactively altering the past to weaken your enemy in the present is a cool idea that not nearly enough people have considered.

“More piggies, GIR! I demand PIGGIEEEES!” Zim’s voice actor gets more perfect every episode.

I like how, despite everything that happened throughout his life in this reality, Dib still became Zim’s arch-nemesis. Say what you will about the kid, but he does not. Give. Up.

…unless he’s dead, holy SHIT.

I feel like there’s a reason they keep showing us the heartrate monitor.

So I guess after Dib’s death, his dad rebuilt him as a super-powerful mech? That’s…awesome, and also kind of weirdly heartwarming.

And now the more Zim changes the past, the stronger Mecha-Dib becomes in the present. I’m not sure how that happens, but I’m NOT complaining.

Well that’s a pretty clever resolution, though I kind of figured we’d end up hitting the reset button on this.

…well, that would probably be a problem if it was ever brought up again.

“ZIM!!!” I love the way Zim says his name. He actually has a number of ways of saying it, but they’re all great.

Alright, I think I’m done for the day. I mean, I can’t imagine any episode managing to top this one. 

*sees title of next episode* 

...one more. This is a special case. 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 14: “Invasion of the Idiot Dog Brain”

This is a majestic title. 

I have never more desperately wanted to know the meaning of an episode title than I do right now.

Ooh, we have the other Irkens again! Nice!

“There were some glitches in the security system…” And wow, now we’re actually getting continuity from episode to episode! (Also, Zim, you might want to look behind you.)

“I MISSED YOU, MOMMEH!” This kid is amazing.

Why does he even bother trying to explain things to GIR? He should know by now he’s not going to understand.

“Pretend it’s a taco!” I don’t think the two things are entirely equatable, but GIR seems to respond to it, so…sure.

And now of course GIR is going to walk into the beam, isn’t he? (Oooooh! That’s what it means by “the Idiot Dog Brain”; because GIR is supposed to be disguised as a dog!)

Oh, this is gonna be good.

I love the dramatic scary music for GIR messing around with the appliances.

I’m sure there are all kinds of references in these old cartoons, but I don’t recognize any of them.

‘ONE YEAR LATER’ ARE YOU SERIOUS

Oh, that’s not good.

“Turn back while we’re still unnoticed!” Liiiiitle late for that, Zim.

I feel like all the voice actors in this series were given specific directions not to read their lines like any other person on the planet.

I feel like stepping on the gas truck should have caused a much larger explosion.

Oh, there it goes!

“Shut your noise tube!” Ooh, that’s good; I’m going to use that on someone.

That is an entirely unreasonable number of police cars.

I’m…not entirely sure what this last scene is meant to imply. Are they using this guy’s brain?

I’ll be honest: this was originally going to be my last post of the day. I mainly just saw this title and wanted to get to it as soon as possible. 

But then I saw the title of the next episode. 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 13: “Rise of the Zitboy”

Did you ever notice the moon? 

I want to know what Zim is doing with those two chickens under observation.

Okay, it looks like he’s doing something involving DNA, one of the chickens, and the Earth. I admit, I was not expecting the show to have an answer for me.

Or I guess we don’t get to find out. Alright then.

Oh wow, okay! We’re still at the Planet Jackers’ star. I admit, I was not expecting that.

“One day you’ll be sitting in your house feeling safe and secure, and then you’ll look over and I’ll be there, doing stuff!” Ah, so that’s where that comes from!

This scene with GIR and the pizza guy is legendary.

I know some people eat pizza differently from others, but I think we can all agree GIR’s method is wrong.

Random Dadbot cameo!

Oh, this is that scene, isn’t it?

“WHY WAS THERE BACON IN THE SOAP?!?!” “I MADE IT MYSELF!” That’s it. This is the best line. It can’t get any better than this.

You know, this commercial really isn’t all that exaggerated; that’s pretty much how most commercials are.

I mean, I don’t know why he expected it to work. He’s an alien; his genetic structure is different from humans. Obviously his body will respond to stimuli differently.

…well, this took a turn I was not expecting.

FUCKING PUSTULIO

You know, this honestly seems more suspicious than just walking around with it undisguised.

And of course Gaz is completely unhypnotized.

Smacky clearly has a great future ahead of him.

“Oh, you’ll open them! You have to breathe some time!” I don’t think Zim has quite mastered human anatomy yet.

…I can’t tell if this was Zim’s plan or not. I’m going to be generous and assume it was.

Aaaand now we’re in an acid trip.

So what Dib realized- his ingenious breakthrough in penetrating Zim’s defenses- was that there’s no security from underground? I can see three other, more obvious holes in his security at just a cursory glance, and two of them are named GIR.

Did they get a new voice for Miss Bitters? She sounds different.

I admit, I was not at all ready for this episode. ...let’s see if I’ll be ready for the next one! 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 12: “Planet Jackers”

I feel like this title is not going to mislead us. 

Well, this sounds nothing short of amazing.

Ah, so we’re getting a montage of how the other Invaders are getting along with their missions. And of course Zim is the only one who hasn’t made significant progress.

“Something is broken and it’s not your fault?” “I know! I’m scared too!” Same here.

“What is this? I know this from somewhere…” Maybe because it’s static. I’m pretty sure static is basically the same everywhere.

Um…am I the only one seeing the blue lights in the sky?

Oh, okay, so that’s a plot point.

I love the interaction between Zim and Dib here. (Also, I just realized how many three-letter names there are on this show.)

…did his eyeball just get knocked out of his face?

Huh. This is actually a really clever concept.

That’s the second smallest ship I’ve ever seen pulling the entire Earth across the galaxy. (You guys know what the first is. Don’t pretend you don’t.)

I love the interaction between these three.

“GIR, fly the cruiser! I have a plan!” Once again, you’re entrusting GIR with this responsibility?!

That still went better than I was expecting.

Yeah, I’m pretty sure I can tell who’s going to win in this screaming-and-punching match.

Okay, but how are we going to get Earth back to its original galactic coordinates?

Ah, alright. This is one of those zero-continuity episodes.

Hmm...nope, still want more of the series. Plus the next few episode titles sound pretty interesting. Let’s check them out! 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 11: “Battle Dib”

It’s been a while, hasn’t it? 

Well, I immediately have no idea what’s going on.

Ah, so Dib appears to be part of some kind of secret society. How legit it actually is remains very much to be seen.

HOLY SHIT GAZ

And of course there’s a giant tube. All labs need a giant tube.

“94.1%. Your score is…acceptable!” Yeah, that’s about right.

You know, whatever I thought this episode was going to be about, this wasn’t it.

I cannot BEGIN to guess what this guy’s deal is.

Why is it so hard to get into this studio?!

“What does this have to do with science?!” My thoughts exactly.

“How did you pass the verbal portion of the exam, anyway?” That is…an excellent question, actually.

Well this got a lot more intense than I was expecting.

I love the transition from this crazy arena to the ordinary film studio.

“Do you have a pen?” “Here you go!” OH MY GOD SERIOUSLY

YOU HAVE INVOKED THE WRATH OF GAZ

“Will the world ever know how hard I tried?” Ha. That’s funny. ‘Trying.’ Because I just got an ad involving “trying”. It’s the same goddamn ad I’ve been getting the entire time with no visible source on infinite repeat COMPLETELY UNMUTEABLE EVERY TWELVE SECONDS THIS WHOLE GODDAMN FUCKI N G  T I M E

(I mean, I know it’s technically my fault for watching this on a shifty third-party site, but come the fuck on; you guys can try harder than this.)

And let me guess: he’s already missed the start of the meeting?

ARE YOU KIDDING ME DIB

This didn’t quite satisfy my Invader Zim craving; let’s do another episode, shall we? 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 9(?): The Wettening

Well, this is embarrassing. I accidentally forgot to post this episode, even though I reacted to them in order. Let’s fix this, since I rather enjoyed this episode. 

Can already tell this is going to be good.

I cannot imagine how this situation could have gone down.

Oh, so it’s about rain. You know, I’m starting to see how this series ended up influencing Peridot’s early characterization (and even parts of it to this day).

Oh hey, it’s Keef! I guess he is alive. That’s genuinely surprising.

And now people are flying. I guess there goes the last of my sanity; that’s okay, I wasn’t using it anyways.

Gas continues to be amazing.

What kind of battle cry is that?!

Okay, that was actually really funny.

Oh, Dib has just made a terrible mistake.

I swear to god one of these days Gaz is just gonna fucking snap and take a tire iron to someone’s face.

OH SHIT NOW THERE’S WATER BALLOONS

10/10 BEST EPISODE

(Although that is very decidedly not how water balloons work)

Oh, this is going to be good.

PFFFFT GAZ WHY ARE YOU SO AMAZING

So Zim is doing…something with the paste. I can’t say I know what.

I have to say, the use of the “Sunday edition” of the paper is a clever way to show the passage of time; most shows would have just cut back to the timer.

What exactly are those kids doing? They’re…floating a book to each other across a fountain? This seems less than ideal for a number of reasons.

Let me guess: the paste froze him in place?

Damn, that’s actually a clever contraption.

OH

OH DAMN I DIDN’T SEE THAT ONE COMING

And now we have a woman in the shower. I think Nickelodeon’s censors were actually being bribed at this point.

Well this has already FAR exceeded my expectations. I admit, I was not ready for this level of escalation.

This is the best climax any episode so far has had.

And let me guess: none of this will be mentioned in the next episode.

“I’ll be in my lab, bathing in paste. Don’t disturb me.” Only Zim could make that sound cool.

I feel like the writers just couldn’t figure out how to end this episode.

Yeah, as I said, I enjoyed this episode. Sorry for posting it out of order. I’d like to have another episode out soon, but unfortunately the source I watch these on has become less and less stable in recent weeks. Anyone else have an alternate source that doesn’t involve me paying a bunch of money to YouTube? 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V Episode 8

Well...I’m sure it’s morning somewhere. 

Last time on Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V, we met a character who allegedly looks like Yuya, who promptly kicked Sawatari’s ass with Xyz Summoning. And there was much rejoicing.

Hello, who is this new character? I assume she’s got something to do with LDS, though I’m not sure what.

Yeah, they can call it “Maiami City” all they want; I’m just going to keep calling it Miami. (Also, the clever subtitles are gone now because I’ve switched over to watching on Crunchyroll. Just want to be safe.)

Even the jet looks weirdly sci-fi. I mean, it doesn’t look particularly more advanced than real jets, but something about it just looks off.

Ah, so she’s the chairwoman. That’s like the CEO, right? But then who’s Not-Kaiba?

“Our plan has taken another step forward.” Well, you’re most definitely not a villain or anything.

Okay, I’m guessing Reiji is Not-Kaiba.

Okay, so I guess neither of them are fully in charge of the company.

Yep, this theme song still kicks ass.

Ah, so she’s Reiji’s mom. Got it.

I like how they’re handling the Pendulum Summoning thing. You have to imagine that something like this would be a massive deal in a world like this, and pretty much everyone would be scrambling to figure out how they could use it for themselves.

And now Yuya’s dad’s name is listed as “Yusyo”. Fine, I’ll go with that.

‘Our enemy?’ Why is this the first I’m hearing about this?

Yeah, no, that guy still doesn’t really look all that much like Yuya to me.

And here we have Sawatari’s dad. And let me guess: he’s super short?

Called it!

I cannot imagine what that display on the board is supposed to represent.

Looks like Yuzu is still distracted thinking about yesterday. I guess I would be pretty distracted too if a guy who allegedly looked like my maybe-boyfriend suddenly appeared, beat up a bunch of duelists with holograms that appear to be genuinely magic even by this series’ very loose rules, and then my bracelet randomly started glowing.

“I can’t teach what I’ve never done.” Again, I love how the Extra Deck summoning methods are near-mythical for everyone in this series. I wonder if VRAINS will have the same kind of thing.

I like how Gongenzaka just sort of hangs out here even though I don’t think he’s either a student or directly connected to the staff.

PFFFFFFFT THE DRAWING

And of course Sora’s just eating his donuts in the background.

Oh fuck off, every single one of you.

And here we see her stake in these matters: she can’t have it getting out that one of her school’s top students lost to some random guy, OR that Xyz Summoning is possible without months of training.

And of course it’s all coming down to a duel. I don’t know why I expected anything different.

Okay, she’s obviously evil, but at the same time I think she’s right about the idea that Pendulum Summoning should be made available to the general public. It’s just not fair to have a powerful summoning mechanic be restricted to the use of a single person.

“A duel isn’t a tool for fighting.” COULD’VE FUCKING FOOLED ME.

Okay, I just heard the word “hajime” in there, and I got all kinds of flashbacks. I know it’s just the Japanese word for “begin”, but I know that at least some of you out there know the context I first learned it from.

Ah, so the three LDS duelists represent to the three Extra Deck summoning methods. I see.

I like how the dramatic ending music keeps playing. It’s like the music is attempting to cue the cameras to go to the next scene.

“He chose a field where I’m an expert.” Gee, what are the odds of that?

And so another episode comes to a close. Would you believe I originally intended to finish this series by the time VRAINS debuted? Yeah, now my goal is to finish by the time VRAINS ends. I kind of knew I’d miss my original goal, but I didn’t think I’d miss by roughly THE ENTIRE SERIES. I’m really sorry, guys. Hopefully the next episode won’t take as long. 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 10: “Career Day”

Sorry for the long absence. 

Huh. Well, they certainly rebuilt the school remarkably quickly after the entire city was demolished by the Water Balloon of Infinite Doom last episode.

Well, jumping right into the episode’s theme here.

“Hey, I wasn’t finished!” I like how Dib noticed the change in camera angle.

Aaaaand that kid’s head just popped off with excitement.

Wait, is this actual backstory? I feel like this would explain some things, while leaving others horrifyingly unanswered.

Is this seriously the whole test? The ones I take in school are way longer than this. And also every time I try to fill one out my results are some weird error that the testing manual can’t explain. And that’s a best case scenario; one time the paper literally just burst into flames. I almost got expelled over that one.

Flawless answers, Zim.

And of course Dib is the only one who got what he wanted.

“I will prepare food with an iron fist!” Never change, Zim.

Miss Bitters become more identifiably inhuman every episode.

Oh hey, Keef’s alive again!

“I am Zim! Take me to the meat!” Only this VA could make that sound so funny.

Continuity! It’s a thing that happens!

I really am starting to wonder what’s going on with Zim’s neck.

And of course now Dib is starting to realize the problem with conspiracy theorists: so few of them can agree on which particular brand of stupid is the best.

Ah, okay, there we go.

That is the second derpiest cow I have ever seen.

“THAT IS NOT A SUPERNATURAL COW!” I love the idea that Dib has encountered enough supernatural cows to understand the difference.

Oh look, there’s Old Kid again. I almost forgot about him. Almost.

And of course, thanks to this guy, they end up missing it completely.

I don’t think the writers fully understand what the term “galactic” means.

“You’re fired!” I love how they play the dramatic sting music over it, as if that’s some dramatic revelation.

Okay, gonna watch one more episode and then I’m seriously going to do Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V next. For real this time. 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim: Episode 8

I think I’m just going to cut this intro section out from now on. 

Alright, “Attack of the Saucer Morons”. With a title like that, this sounds like it’s gonna be a fun time.

Immediately I love the show’s take on the “unintelligible radio chatter” trope.

And now it would appear Zim is out and about in his ship.

Everything about Zim’s analysis here is absolutely wonderful.

Wow. That has to be the first time I’ve ever seen a bug play chicken with a vehicle windshield and win.

Yeah, something tells me that GIR has other priorities right now.

Okay, I wasn’t expecting the dance party.

I think I can predict in advance exactly how this plan is going to go wrong.

Well, I was basically right, though I didn’t expect the conspiracy nut to get involved.

I don’t think Zim fully grasps the concept of stealth.

“Processing…PROCESSING!!!” I love this computer.

Oh yes, the very picture of inconspicuous…ness…?

Ah, so these are the “Saucer Morons”. I admit, this was not what I was expecting.

FUCKING STARCHUNK

Yeah, I don’t really want to know what the “initiation” entails. Which is good, because apparently we don’t get to see it.

“THE PIG ACCEPTS ME!!!” Flawless.

Ooh, that’s a problem.

“Don’t come any closer, or I’ll…I’ll lay eggs in your stomach! I mean it!” Oh, so this is what that quote’s from!

Again, you’re trusting GIR with the rescue mission?

“…what?” Yeah, see? This plan is immediately off to an even worse start than the last one.

“I am Government Man, come from the government!” I swear to god the writing on this show is absolute top tier.

Wait, I’m starting to see some flaws with the logic here. If they think GIR is a government android, then logically that would imply that “Government Man’s” identity is more solid. But if that’s the case, wouldn’t they be more likely to believe his story? Why does the fact that the alleged government agent now has a government android make you suddenly think he was lying about Zim not being an alien?! Gaaaah, this is hurting my brain; let’s just say that these guys are fucking idiots and leave it at that.

“RIDE THE PIG!” This is probably up there with “Get on my swan” for favorite ways to convince someone to get on the back of a disproportionately large animal.

Okay, that actually gave me a legit scare.

Let me guess: this is where the bee comes back?

WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS THAT BEE

This would probably be a concerning ending if this show had literally any continuity.

Well that was a decent episode. I’m off to go do some Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V liveblogging now. 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 7: “Dark Harvest”

And here we are with another Invader Zim reaction. I’ve been told this episode was pretty fucked up, even by this show’s standards, so I’m excited. 

And now we have a stuffed rabbit in a jar. At least I THINK it’s stuffed. It doesn’t look real, but you can never tell on this show.

“My organs!” The best reaction to pain.

“I’ve got a squeedlyspooch.” OH MY GOD GAZ

Hmm…now who exactly are these guys? They look like military, and they have some kind of tablet device, but they seem to be delivery guys of some sort.

Yeah, I think Dib went farther than he intended with that speech.

“You’ve got head pigeons!” Okay, 1) how did she not notice it fly in, but 2) never before have I so badly wanted to know the details of a disease as with “head pigeons”.

Oooookay, now we’ve got fucking exploding collars serving as hall passes. I think we’re bordering on Danganronpa 3 territory at this point.

I have a hard time understanding how all those classrooms can be so close to one another.

“Say…you’re full of organs, aren’t you?” DON’T ANSWER THAT, RANDOM KID; IT’S A TRICK QUESTION

AAAAAND Zim just replaced one of that kid’s organs with a suicide collar that will explode when he leaves the school. I’d say I was surprised, but at this point I’d say I’m probably used to it; this show is fucking intense.

The pencil scene is absolutely perfect.

“He’s missing his liver. That’s how some people react to the cafeteria food. The lucky ones.” Yeah, the food at my school cafeteria was pretty much like that.

Was that dog food? EDIT: Actually, I think it was soda.

Well, there goes the hall pass.

Man, Zim worked fast. I feel like he actually gets MORE competent in episodes where Dib IS present.

…and now there’s a cat. In a place. I don’t want to say exactly what I think the joke is supposed to be; I’ll just say that I am ASTOUNDED Cartoon Network let them get away with that.

Yeah, starting to spot a flaw in Zim’s plan.

“I’ve been working out!” That is literally the exact opposite of how that works, Zim.

I can’t decide whether Zim slurping up “his” large intestine like a spaghetti noodle is the funniest or most horrifying thing I’ve ever seen. Probably both.

I am not at all comfortable with that squelching sound.

Why does this random classroom have pickled organs, taxidermied hawks, and- oh yeah- a barrel of radioactive waste? I mean, two of those would make sense if this was the biology room, but we already saw that was somewhere else, PLUS it still wouldn’t explain the goddamn radioactive fucking waste, would it?

This is actually getting pretty intense. See, Zim episode climaxes tend to be either really cool or impossibly anticlimactic; it’s hard to tell which one they’ll go for.

Wait, what did he actually do to him?

Yeah, that’s about right for Dib.

Wow, they were not kidding. This was a really fucking twisted episode. I love it. 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 6: “Germs”

What exactly are tacos? I don’t just want a dictionary definition; I want a commonality. What is the quality that relates all tacos to each other? What is the boundary which defines when an object stops being a taco and starts being, say, a comic book? These are the things I think about sometimes; it scares me, and it should scare you too. 

I noticed this before, but I like how the place where Zim is imagining conquering the world changes each time.

…well this is certainly an interesting way to open an episode. I’m guessing this is a dream sequence or in-universe movie or something?

Ah, I see: they’re setting up the trope that aliens get killed off by human diseases. It’s definitely a classic, even though I think it’s pretty unrealistic (in reality, aliens would probably have different basic genetic material than us, meaning that Earth bacteria and viruses would have no goddamn idea what to do to them).

Yep, figured it was a movie.

The way Zim laughs is absolutely amazing.

And of course now Zim is going to go absolutely paranoid with hypochondria (god, that is a hard word to spell) because he’s afraid the germs will ruin his mission.

Yeah, okay, that’s actually kind of terrifying. (Although the sight of Zim screaming at an apparently empty room basically cancels it out.)

“Planet Callnowia”

Have I ever mentioned how much I love the planet names in this series?

Okay, that was actually a really cool scene, even though it ultimately served no purpose. In fact, it was cool because it served no purpose; it was something totally extra that they just felt like including, and I appreciate that.

…why is GIR holding a pig?

“HERE ME NOOOOW, GEEEEEERMS!” Zim’s voice actor is one of the greatest I’ve ever heard.

Wow, this is an impressive array he apparently set up in about five minutes.

That is without a doubt the cutest single-celled organism I’ve ever seen. So of course it has to die.

And now Zim realizes that trying to get rid of all germs is a losing battle; every time you open the door, an entire new army arrives. Also, I want to know what GIR thinks he’s doing.

I’d be lying if I said this scene wasn’t still kind of cool.

…how and why did he rig up that tree?

I feel like Zim just has a contractual obligation to make at least one word in each scene as hammy as possible. In this underground scene it was “MISSION!”

Yeah, I don’t think the Tallest are that concerned with you missing your report.

“Or one of those exploding head planets!” Those exist?! THERE’S MORE THAN ONE OF THEM?!?!

“…did that scare you too?” Purple Tallest is best Tallest.

Gotta love that bootleg McDonalds.

Yeah, this is one of those places where you don’t need any futuristic goggles to see germs; they exist in visible quantities here.

BURGERLORD

That story was majestic.

…he’s gonna be wearing the meat, isn’t he?

Yep. The very picture of inconspicuousness.

I like how Dib hasn’t even appeared in the last two episodes. Zim is doing a remarkably good job of thwarting his own plans. 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V: Episode 7 (!)

Guess who’s back, everyone?! I’m not gonna talk for too long; just gonna jump (or rather, swing) into action. 

And we start off with a new character. I have zero idea who he is, but his hair is so ridiculous that he must be important.

Well, that badge looks like it says “LDS”, but it doesn’t look like the same logo. The plot thickens.

Oh good, this asshat is still here.

“…you guys should call me Neo Sawatari!” I am literally never going to call you that ever.

And of course jump-cut to Yuya being Yuya.

“The Wrath of Rebellion: Dark Rebellion Xyz Dragon!” WAIT FUCKING WHAT

Okay, so it looks like Xyz Monsters are also going to be a thing now. Color me impressed.

I still don’t know this little red-haired girl’s name.

Huh, looks like we have a Yuzu-centric episode, eh? Alright, I’m down.

I cannot possibly imagine what kind of food that is he’s describing, but it sounds god-awful. And the weird thing is, most of the individual components sound great on their own, but when combined into one dish I cannot imagine a good result being produced.

Oh hey, this guy again.

…so he knows her, does he? That’s interesting.

Alright, I know how to admit when I was wrong: that pie looks fucking delicious.

Okay, I like how the dramatic music literally screeched to a stop when she pointed out the pie on his face.

Her side of the screen keeps getting bigger oh my god

Whoa, what is this music I’m hearing? Is this the mystery guy’s theme?

Ah, so it is an LDS badge, okay. (Although based on the logo it looks more like LD5.)

Well that’s a different-looking Duel Disk.

So Yuzu has no idea who this guy is, but the guy knows her and clearly has some personal connection with her. I have a feeling I see where this is going (I was kind of spoiled on the fact that parallel universes become a thing at some point in this series, although I know literally nothing else about the plot beyond here), but I’ll just let it play out and see what happens.

Oh wow, even the duel subtitles don’t know this guy’s name.

Well…that’s certainly an interesting opening move. Can’t say I’ve seen that strategy before.

Yeah, I wouldn’t be so cocky around a guy who has five potential Trap Cards waiting for you. When your opponent has that many face-downs, it’s not a matter of if you’re going to get screwed up, it’s how.

I like the touch that he actually has a holofoil card. That injects a moment of realism into this whole thing.

Wait, you can release a single Level 5-7 monster to Advanced Summon a Level 8+ monster? Since when? Was that always a thing and I just didn’t know about it?

Ah, okay, that makes more sense.

Oh wow, I didn’t even pick up on the fact that it’s not an Action Field; I’m so used to holograms doing whatever the fuck the writers want them to that I forgot this series was trying to justify it. So I guess that Duel Disk must have the Solid Vision technology built into it somehow?

Yeah, I’m going to guess that the cards that were destroyed have some effect in the graveyard, right?

Called it!

I like the new effect for Banishing. I’m not sure if Zexal had an effect like that, actually.

Well this guy has a distinctly different tone than the rest of this series. It’s like they photoshopped a 5Ds character into first-season GX.

OH THIS IS IT ISN’T IT

“XYZ SHOUKUN!” You have no idea how good it feels to hear that again.

So here we have what appears to be this guy’s ace monster: “Dark Rebellion Xyz Dragon”. I can’t help but notice the similarity of the name to “Odd-Eyes Pendulum Dragon”, but then again the naming motif of “Adjective Noun Description Dragon” has been pretty standard across the franchise so it might just be a symbolic thing.

The phrase “Xyz Summoning Course” still makes me laugh.

Oh wow, that’s a pretty powerful monster you have there, Sawatari. Would be a real shame if someone…used an ATK reducing effect TWICE!

So yes, this guy does indeed have a Solid Vision system of some kind inside his Duel Disk. That’s…interesting.

“Academia”…isn’t that what Duel Academy from GX was called in the Japanese version? Eh, probably a coincidence. 

Well damn, that would probably be an intimidating Trap Card if it wasn’t in the hands of the series’ least competent duelist.

Oh wow, that’s TWO perfect losses IN A ROW this guy has gone through.

“This is the pain and sorrow of the battlefield!” Iiiiinteresting. So this guy is a soldier of some kind, is he?

Wait, why does she think he’s Yuya? Is he supposed to look like Yuya? I mean…I guess I kind of see it, maybe?

What happened to Sawatari? His coat got speared, and now he’s allegedly injured?

Ooookay, Yuzu’s bracelet is doing a thing, and now the mystery guy is gone.

And of course Yuya quite coincidentally arrives at the same time the guy who allegedly looks like him disappears.

Looking at them side by side like this…I mean, I guess there’s a resemblance.

Well damn, I’m really starting to get curious about what’s going on in the story. So we have a kid who looks like Yuya but is apparently some kind of soldier, he knows Yuzu (I keep wanting to call her Tori from sheer muscle memory; god I miss Zexal) and wants to keep her safe, and now there’s something going down with LDS and something called Academia. Honestly, I’m just glad because this is the first episode where we didn’t have to see that damnable hippo. 

Alright, see you guys for Episode 8; hopefully it won’t take over a month this time! 

[calvinwatchesstuff]

Let’s Watch Invader Zim Episode 5: “Walk of Doom”

BACK TO ZIM

Based on the name alone, this already sounds amazing.

And here we have GIR doing his best Spongebob impression. Off to a good start.

Ah, so Zim is trying to repair GIR’s guidance systems. Hence why GIR is acting even loopier than usual.

I love how there was a beehive in GIR’s head with no explanation, and that it just went away two seconds after being introduced.

“The Scary Monkey Show” is just an actual thing in this universe and that worries me.

Also, that cul-de-sac made me think of The Witness. That was a good game up until the puzzles became impossible.

I was going to comment on the holographic chihuahua, but I think I was traumatized by the Scary Monkey Show.

…Michael Jackson?

“To make room for the cupcake!” I see absolutely nothing wrong with this logic.

The phrase “Information Humans” is intrinsically funny to me.

I just noticed the words “What About the Bus?” on the side of that bus. This raises a valid question: what about the bus?

Oh, okay, it’s a plot point. That…actually just raises more questions.

While “HAVE YOU THE BRAIN WORMS?!” is an absolutely amazing phrase, I can’t imagine this will go any way but badly for you.

…yep, so, that was the most disturbing thing I’ve ever seen. (Seriously, what is it with this show and traumatizing imagery involving eyeballs?)

“They’ve booby-trapped their sun somehow!” ZIM WHY ARE YOU SO PERFECT

This is an awfully convoluted scheme for getting home, but at the same time I can’t think of a better plan in this situation.

WHY IS THERE A CLOWN ON THE BUS

That is one ugly baby.

Okay, I noticed two posters in the background here. One says “Stop Making Babies”; while I would fully endorse not creating any more monstrosities like the one on this bus, I think I see some problems with the plan as a whole. The other says “The Goat Whats You”; this one is just self-explanatory.

Why did “incredible eyes” need a reverb effect?

Oh hey, it’s that guy from earlier! Except I didn’t pay any attention to him so I don’t really care.

I’m starting to see a pattern to GIR’s behavior. It really does make me curious how much of his body is composed of food at this point.

Yeah, something tells me this is not home.

Alright, that’s enough for tonight. I’ll pick back up tomorrow, and I swear to god Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V will be coming back soon.