Cameron Wilde @cam-wilde-blog - Tumblr Blog

jessicaxporter:

And what a good thing, I would hate to have to call you a liar.

You’re seriously lucky you’re cute.

jessicaxporter:

And you have a way with words that astounds me, darling.

I have never once claimed to be a wordsmith, Porter.

jessicaxporter:

Yes, and the other half is instilling the fear of god into the souls of the employees with a single look, so you see why I would need to actually be at the office. Oh, please, this is just the start, Wilde, you are in for a good ride.

God, you’re so sexy...

jessicaxporter:

I have a feeling that wouldn’t work with the company, and I actually like my job there, so… Oh no, I’m not telling, what’s the fun in that? You have to discover said talents on your own as we go.

Why not? Isn’t like half of your job just paper work? I’m sure that could just as easily be done from home as it could in the office. I thought I had discovered most of them already!

jessicaxporter:

I’m pretty sure if that were to happen, I would get fired due to being late all the time, or just plainly not showing up to work, and I’d rather that not happening. You won’t regret it, I have many talents you have yet to find, and being a great masseuse is one of them.

Work from home. Problem solved. Well now you have me intrigued. What else does miss Porter have up her sleeve?

jessicaxporter:

That is preposterous, considering you’re already getting laid on the regular. Unless I’ve been hallucinating, of course, but don’t let me stop you from trying harder, sweetheart. Oh, shut up, you. Aren’t you so kind, maybe I can sweeten the deal by offering a nice, shared bath followed by a massage? I found these oils that are to die for.

Yeah, but I could get laid more if I was more than just cute, I’m sure. You had me at shared bath, but massage with death-worthy oils definitely sounds like a sweet deal to me.

jessicaxporter:

You know me so well already, it’s cute. Oh, I certainly have, and I know I’m attractive, but you kind of take my breath away sometimes when I so much as look at you. Chivalrous, I like it. It’s a date, then! And, in exchange, how about I swing by your place tonight and we can have dinner at mine, and maybe you just happen to spend the night?

Just cute? Damn. Well cute isn’t going to get me laid. Guess I better try harder next time. Wow, Jessica Porter is a total softy for her girlfriend. Color me surprised. I suppose I could try to find a way to make such a thing happen.

jessicaxporter:

Boss ass bitch… you know, I could get used to be called a bitch in that context, I like it. You’re so full of it, but I’ll let it slide because you’re unbelievably attractive. It’s a date, then. How about you pick the restaurant and I’ll meet you there?

I kinda figured you might appreciate it in such terms. Unbelievably attractive? Have you not looked in a mirror recently? At the very least, to you, it should be believable. Or I could pick you up from work and surprise you with the restaurant?

jessicaxporter:

You are far too charming for your own good, Wilde. Sometimes I don’t even kn ow what ever I will do with you, but I suppose asking you out for lunch tomorrow is as good a start as any?

How else would I have managed to land myself a boss ass bitch as my girlfriend? Gotta be the most charming person you’ve ever met. I’d say that’s a pretty good start, yes.

jessicaxporter:

Really, now? I would’ve thought you spent enough time around Cohen Pharm that you were bound to have heard the horror stories of the ice queen.

They only make up those stories because you’re a strong, independent woman that also happens to be a boss ass bitch and they’re super jealous of that. So, yeah, maybe they could say bad things about you, but it’s all just a pile of crap and even they know it.

jessicaxporter:

So, according to this quiz I took earlier, the kind of cereal I eat says a lot about me. For example: turns out, it’s hard to find anyone that has something bad to say about me. And to that, I will happily call bullcrap.

Well, I, for one, can’t think of a single bad thing that anyone could say about you.

iMessage 📲 #SQUAD

KEN: Asher, I don't even have words right now...

ASH: ...I HATE YOU ALL

ASH: EXCEPT JAXON

KEN: Syd, I hope you know we're just messing around, if I wanted to kick Cam I wouldn't warn her.

JAX: I'm side eyeing you rn too because of that one, babe. sorry!

CAM: HA

SYD: I know.

iMessage 📲 #SQUAD

KEN: And I would welcome it just to get the pleasure of giving you a concussion

ASH: Dude, Cam, just don't fucking come cryin when she actually knocks your eyeballs outta your head

SYD: I don't like any of this...

CAM: how could i cry if i have no eyeballs dumbass

iMessage 📲 #SQUAD

ASH: WAIT! Lemme get some popcorn first

KEN: Yes, I damn well will

JAX: I second the popcorn thing

JAX: and the not drop kicking Cam thing

CAM: I third all of the above including Kendall trying to drop kicking me so my girl can break her nose again :)

iMessage 📲 #SQUAD

ASH: BUUUURN

KEN: and look who just earned herself a kick to the head next time I see her

KEN: And yes, I can actually do it

SYD: No you absolutely will not

CAM: HA

CAM: THE LADY HAS SPOKEN!

iMessage 📲 #SQUAD

KEN: I'm drop kicking you next time I see you

KEN: Except you, Cam, you're in the clear

ASH: Not gonna lie, if you're actually able to drop kick someone, that's fucking hot. All due respect and all that.

CAM: #blest

JAX: its okay, I know you have feelings deep deep deep down inside.

CAM: nah dude, she can only BE drop kicked. by jess, probs

iMessage 📲 #SQUAD

KEN: Yeah, let's just chill it for a bit and then revise at a better time, yes? Thank for being so cool about it, tho, I guess you're not too bad, fuckers

ASH: SHE LOVES US

Ken: Don't make me regret it...

JAX: WE LOVE YOU TOO KEN

CAM: you're alright i guess

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