my life, my say

always promoting the things I love <33

[camzy]

day 1 sa elyu <3

[camzy]

i have qs hahahaha sana may sumagot

So kasi ask lang, if nasa relationship kayo, ano take niyo sa partner na ayaw magpahawak ng phone niya kasi privacy daw and all? cause pwede nga maging cause ng away which is true naman, especially dahil may history na rin involving past relationships.

Sa ex ko kasi, freely naming nahahawakan phones ng isa’t isa, so hindi talaga siya naging issue for me. Hindi rin naman sa gusto kong maghalungkat or magbantay, pero curious lang ako kung ano perspective niyo sa ganitong setup.

Okay lang ba sa inyo na may ganung boundary, or do you think dapat normal lang na comfortable kayong makahawak ng phone ng partner niyo?

[camzy]

it’s starting na, kung kelan naman kaya dapat talaga wag kang masasanay eh hahahahaa jk

[camzy]

Basta guard your heart Camz I don’t want to see you cry like that again :)

huhu thank you! appreciate itt

[camzy]

Maybe you’re right since bago pa lang naman best foot forward

we’ll see i guess hahahaha 🫣

[camzy]

My friend dating 3 girls at a time, tapos sabay sila tumawag for a sleep call. naka-mute lang iyong 2 then chat sila mag-usap ng isa 😂

omygosh 😭 what a MANNNN! yun nga if magloloko sila magloloko talaga kahit na anong bantay hahahaha

[camzy]

Rebound Camz and having other accounts than main usually sign of cheating

really?? hahahahaha but he mentioned to me na yesterday lang daw niya first time i-open ulit yung account hahaha. And he’s always talking to me about trust, like kahit ano pang bantay mo sa tao, if he’s cheating, he’s cheating talaga, so like confuse lang ako sa mixed signals na pinapakita nya hahahaha

[camzy]

I feel like I don’t want to continue this hahaha lol. Nawawalan na ako ng gana kasi during the first week while we were talking, syempre nang-stalk ako hahaha, and I found out na mutuals pa rin sila ng ex niya. He also liked one of her recent IG pics, so cinonfront ko siya about that. I asked him bakit mutuals pa rin sila and all. But he did unfollow the girl naman and removed the heart hahaha because I said so.

And honestly, that time mga 3 days pa lang naman kaming nag-uusap, so okay lang. I wasn’t that attached to him pa naman, so it was fine. I even said to myself na that would be the last time I’d mention his ex kasi we were just talking lang naman hahaha, and I know I don’t really have the right.

But yesterday, he mentioned na may isa pa pala siyang fb account. So I checked it, and I just found out now na mutuals pa rin sila ng ex niya doon. So parang nawawalan na naman ako ng gana hahaha. And like I said, I don’t think he’s that deeply interested in me naman, so it’s fine lol.

Idk, sobrang mixed signals talaga every time. I really appreciate naman that he talks to me every single day, like even when he’s with his friends. But at the same time, I don’t think we match that well… or maybe because 2 weeks pa lang naman kaming nag-uusap?

But honestly I don’t know what to do. Siguro hindi na lang ako masyado maattach and stop asking too many questions para reciprocate lang kami. Parang I should just go with the flow muna righttt

[camzy]

There’s this new guy I’ve been talking to for about two weeks now. He’s kind and funny, but the only problem for me is that he’s not really the type who likes texting cause he’s more of a call person. We talk every single day, even when he’s at work or out drinking with his friends, which I really appreciate because he’s not ashamed to talk to me around them. He even tells stories about me to his friends.

Butttt, Idk hahaha. Maybe it’s still too early to judge, but I just don’t feel like he’s super interested in me yet. He asks questions sometimes, but not really the kind where he wants to know more about me deeply. Like, I don’t even know if he knows my favorite color. Although, I noticed he always remembers the small details I mention, even if I only said them once.

So yeah, I’m kinda not satisfied with that part hahaha jk. But for now, there’s no commitment at all, and I don’t want to get too attached to him yet.

[camzy]

why would u do that? lol ang effort tanggalin lahat ng heart and comments sa picture kooo really??? for what omg idk naaaa

[camzy]

i really did breakdown in front of my mom :( i can’t take this anymore sobrang bigat na talaga ng nararamdaman ko, sobrang halo halo na and ang wish ko lang ay sana maging okay na lahat grabeng may to pagpasok na pagpasok ganto agad pero i know malalagpasan ko too :(( lord heal me and i hope maging okay na lahat

[camzy]

nandito na naman tayo sa phase na to :( grabe i don’t know what to do sobrang sakit and at the same time sobrang dami kong tanong sa sarili ko like ayoko na ng ganto huhuhu please ayoko na ulit umiyak

[camzy]

No contact also teaches you self-respect. Kapag may taong pinili ang lumayo, the most mature thing to do is not to chase them or force your presence. Minsan ang tunay na strength ay yung marunong kang umatras. Sometimes distance gives you clarity. Habang wala kayong contact, mas nakikita mo kung ano talaga ang worth mo. At doon mo rin makikita kung sino ang kusang babalik at sino ang kayang mawala nang hindi ka hinahanap. In the end, you understand something important. The right person will never make you feel easy to leave. At kung kaya ka nilang bitawan nang ganun lang, maybe the real lesson is choosing your own peace instead of holding on to someone who isn’t sure about you.

[camzy]

It’s not about social media standards.

It’s about self-respect and choosing not to settle for the bare minimum. People aren’t raising standards for no reason, they just don’t want to experience situations that they feel they don’t deserve. If anything, standards should be higher because without them, you end up accepting less than you deserve. Women deserve a man who puts in effort, not someone who can't put effort.

[camzy]

It’s been a week now, and I think I’m starting to understand him better. Maybe he’s right that he needs time for himself. I’ve been reflecting, and it’s possible I was controlling in ways I didn’t even realize. So maybe this space is actually what’s best right now.

But at the same time, a part of me is still holding on and quietly hoping that we’ll be okay. I remember he said he doesn’t want to give me false hope because he has his own problems he needs to work through on his own. And now I just don’t know what to do.

[camzy]

why do I feel like namamagnet ako ng mga unstable peeps? or the issue actually on my side bc yk im the one who allowed them into my life, i guess? maybe?

rn its like im really decided cause i know ginawa ko naman lahat for us like inopen ko na din lahat ng worries ko but still i didnt see the side of him that was willing so its like im done. idk but i should have learned from my past but look hahaha im still in the same situation again. so i think maybe im the problem but nexttime i'll make sure to be more careful who I choose. i keep asking myself what am I really regretting? Is it the bond, the memories, or what, but in reality, there shouldn’t be anything to regret. I need to instill in myself that I should love myself more than anyone else, because I don’t want to go through the same mistake again.

[camzy]

wow relapse ha, lol idk huhu naconfused tuloy ako kung okay naba talaga ako or indenial lang ako pero okay nako eh, meron bang okay na nagrerelapse :(