charavibes:
“Eloquent as ever,” Charles muttered under a breath. He knew he had no right this time around to be an asshole to her, especially with the halfheartedly dried tears sticking to her face that he could see from even halfway across the room. Charles hadn’t ever wanted to make Cara cry, especially not in an instance like this, but there also was the teeniest victory in the back of his mind. At least she knew how it felt now, right? There wasn’t nearly as much rejoice with that as Charles had assumed there would have been.
He took one step forward, arms folded behind his back. “Look. If you’re mad, I get it, and if you want me to leave, then I get that too. But if you wanna, like, talk about anything else without raising your voice to anything more than a normal volume, then I’d be alright with that too.” Subconsciously, his head turned enough to get the door in his peripheral. The last thing either of them needed was Laken waking up to their arguing again.
“Whats there to talk about? We are horrible for each other.. we are horrible to each other.. its unhealthy..” she cracked, trying to keep her voice as low as possible, leaning against the headboard to see him. “You deliberately hurt me, I hurt you. Its a cycle that we can’t see to break.. so whats the point? You’d be better off without me. I don’t want you to waste the time you have with me if you are gonna be unhappy.” she swallowed thickly, looking away from him and to the windows where she could see the rain hitting the screen. Normally the rain would have been calming but tonight it only made it all worse.
“I love you, God, do I fucking love you. But look what I do to you. Look what I made you do to me... I change you.. I make you this horrible man who snaps at me and takes any jab he can in hopes of hurting me and how can I blame you for that? I did this to you. I don’t want this for you. I want you to smile and be loved and I want all the things for you that I just can’t give you..” she barely managed to get out before she had to stop, her throat tight and burning from the emotions that seemed to just be pouring out of her.
“I just want to know at the end of it all you lived a life that meant something to you with someone who makes you happy and cares for you.. someone who will be able to be proud of your relationships and all the good times you had.. not be disappointed by all the pain they caused you when they should have been cherishing you. Its too late for me to make it up to you but its not too late for someone else to make it right..”
