dead stars

caroline carmichael. 24.

[lubezkis]

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Zou Bisou Bisou by Jessica Paré

[carolinecarmichael]

mary-elizabeth-hart:

Mary wrinkled her nose and took a bite with a shake of her head. “There are worse things in life than being fat…being fat isn’t even a bad thing.” She defended feeling mildly uncomfortable. “You know kidney failure leads to death, right?”

"How?" Caroline snorted, widening her eyes. "How come being fat isn’t even a bad thing? It’s easy for you to preach but go ask that to a fat person, how it feels like to be fat in an Instagram perfect world like ours where everybody judge each other based on their looks." She pointed out with an eye roll. "You know being fat also leads you to death, right?"

[carolinecarmichael]

calebcarmichael:

“At least it’s not forever.” Hopefully, anyway. If their uncle managed to croak in rehab, who knew what would happen. Maybe they really would wind up stuck in Portland, turned into the new and permanent poster children for their mother’s side of the family. And if that was the case, Caleb would definitely be pushing Caroline into the ocean for the free ticket home – Or possibly sooner. “God, stop whining,” he groaned back, shooting a grimacing glance in his twin’s direction. “I’m not going alone. If I’m suffering, then you are too. Besides, what else would you be doing anyway – hanging out at the penthouse? Don’t try to act like you already have plans.”

“I’ll tell dad that I wanna go back to Yale to finish my studies, he would let me.” Then again you never knew with Carmichaels, her dad would pull a 180 and change his mind completely. Caroline already started fantasizing the ways to trick her family to let her move back to East Coast, her list was getting more and more ridiculous by day. Her eyes rolled at Caleb’s reaction. “I am allowed to whine, shut up.” She snapped, crossing her arms. “No, I am not. Well, hanging out at the penthouse would be a lot better option, and how do you know I don’t have any plans? Because I do.” Okay, that was a lie and Caleb probably saw through her already -- back in home Caroline only had few close friends, they all were so wrapped up in their little circle, they refused to socialize. It was a habit of Caroline and it certainly didn’t change in Portland.

[carolinecarmichael]

gabby-hess:

“Don’t worry. You can say Portland’s weird. You won’t offend me,” Gabby assured the other woman. Having spent all but four years of her life living in the city, she’d gotten used to its eclectic nature, but she knew it didn’t charm everyone. “I can’t say I eat much French food, but an ex-boyfriend did take me out to this place downtown.” She struggled to remember the name. “I think it’s called Le Pigeon? Might be worth a shot.” 

"It’s weird as hell. How can anyone live here?" Caroline cracked, as if she has been holding her breath to fit in a super tight skinny (which was a feeling she was very much familiar with) and finally managed it. "Really? I love French food, it’s my favorite." She loved everything about French culture, their habits, their architecture -- pretty much everything, including their food. "Oh I haven’t tried that one. I have been in this French restaurant and the food was atrocious, they brought my chicken raw -- I mean what am I? A barbarian?" She rolled her eyes, chuckling. Realizing she hasn’t even introduced herself to other woman, she shook her head slowly. "God, where are my manners?" She said, resting her hand on her chest. "I am Caroline, I don’t think I have told you."

[wordsnquotes]

Forgive me, for all the things I did but mostly for the ones that I did not.

Donna Tartt, The Secret History

[frozenrevolution]

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[carolinecarmichael]

sabrina-bishop:

“Not blind,” Sabrina corrected as she began to pick up the scattered pointe shoes and throw them back inside the now torn box. “I’m okay though, thank you for asking,” she added with an eye-roll, getting back up once everything was collected. “Are you alright? I’ll pay for those if they broke, no need to cry about it.”

Caroline rolled her eyes at the fact she forgot to ask if she was okay or not. “Sorry, I got panicked. I am glad you are okay though.” Her words didn’t sound very convincing. If you asked her parents, they would say they raised their kids to become a kind, classy individuals. And honestly at fancy events filled with Connecticut elite, Caroline was the kindest person you have ever met but when it came to strangers, she didn’t care. As shallow as it sounded, it was the truth. Funny that she despised fake people, yet she was one. “Yes, I am okay.” She said, forcing a smile. “I am not crying about it.”

[carolinecarmichael]

gabby-hess:

“Yeah, give it to your twin. In my experience, boys eat practically anything,” Gabby remarked. She’d learned that over the years, several of her ex-boyfriends having an appetite that required her to cook often. “How are you liking Portland so far?” she asked curiously. “Seen all the touristy sites yet?”

“You probably have a point.” Then again Caroline doubted for a second, knowing how picky and annoying Caleb could be, she highly suspected he would eat the cookies. “Portland is...” She paused to search for the right word without offending the other brunette, “-- interesting.” That was a nice way of saying weird in Caroline’s book. “I have. I probably have seen all of the museums in my first two weeks. I am still having a hard time to find a decent French restaurant though.”

[stephencolbertly]

Anya Taylor-Joy photographed by Lara Jade for Rollacoaster (Spring/Summer 2018)

[carolinecarmichael]

Caroline Carmichael + Wardrobe 1/?

[carolinecarmichael]

mary-elizabeth-hart:

“Never? Not even pizza?” Mary wrinkled her nose and took a bite of the cookie. “You know too few carbs has been linked to kidney failure, so I mean eating carbs isn’t all bad.”

“I don’t like pizza.” Her nose wrinkled in distaste, Caroline pursed her lips together. She never understood people’s fascination with pizza, hell she even ate in best restaurants in Italy, yet she still wasn’t impressed. “I’d rather have a kidney failure than get fat.”

[carolinecarmichael]

gabby-hess:

“Why not buy both?” she suggested. Whenever she couldn’t decide between two things, Gabby resorted to purchasing both items. Who could stop her? “Do you have any siblings you could share with? Maybe a neighbor or co-worker you actually like?” She offered a warm smile. “I’m sure my niece would thank you if she were here right now. She really wants that prize.”

“I guess I can do that.” Her shoulders shrugged, Caroline chuckled. Considering how much she loved shopping, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to buy both of the cookies. “I have a twin, maybe he’d eat those. I haven’t met my neighbors yet, I’ve moved here a month ago.” Sighing dramatically, she shook her head. “Oh, she’s ambitious then? That’s great.”

[carolinecarmichael]

calebcarmichael:

It probably would’ve been easier to agree to disagree – or even come to the truthful realization that they both had their ruthless streaks (Caleb somewhat more so), but instead he continued to shake his head. “It doesn’t change the fact that you’re a bitch,” he said matter-of-factly, no malice to his tone. Because, hey, being a bitch was occasionally a helpful skill. Caleb sighed, arms lifting to loosely cross over his chest while they walked and he listened to Caroline. “Everyone has their own, personalized delusion of grandeur out here.” God, did he hate the West Coast. “Hm, maybe. I probably should’ve fought harder not to come,” Caleb relented, but he hadn’t wanted to admit that he failed to land his summer internship and he hadn’t wanted to risk Caroline ratting him out, either. Their mother may have vocalized that she loved him more, but being a flop still wasn’t acceptable. Glancing towards the other, he added, “There’s a company dinner at the end of July, by the way. We’re supposed to go and represent the family.”

“I am only bitch to you because you are an asshole.” Her defense was poor, just like the homeless guy who was looking at them. Instinctively, Caroline held her handbag tighter and pursed her lips together nervously. “Right? I don’t know how people actually want to live here. I’d Virginia Woolf’d already.” She sighed, her nose wrinkled as she spotted another homeless person. If Julia let Caleb stay but force Caroline to move in Portland, she would definitely throw a fit. And knowing their mom, she would probably let Caleb stay in East Coast. At least that’s how Caroline felt about the whole deal. “Noooo,” She groaned almost, but stopped herself. “I don’t want to go. I can’t go, you have to ago alone. Besides mom would rather you to represent the family anyway.”

[portlandsmack-blog]

Don't you think the twins are a little tooooo close?

Flowers in the Attic, y’all. @calebcarmichael , @carolinecarmichael

[carolinecarmichael]

“If your first instinct is think of incest whenever you see pair of twins, you all need to see a shrink.”

[carolinecarmichael]

sabrina-bishop:

Touring was exhausting, especially after late shows with even later dinners and parties. Things Sab never really cared for; her main focus was being the best on stage not attending celebrations afterward. However, for the first time since the company’s tour began the dancer was excited about a stop. They’d stay here a while and she’d finally have a chance to take a look at the empty studio in town. “Oh! I’m sorry,” the brunette breathed out in surprise as she bumped into someone, one of the boxes on hand immediately hitting the ground with the impact. “I didn’t see you there,” she apologized once more before bending over to pick up her now scattered pointe shoes from the ground.

It has been a month already and Caroline was still having a hard time to adjust -- she always knew living in Portland would be a big challenge for her, especially after years of living in Connecticut but she didn’t think it was going to take this long. It’s not like she was trying so hard to fit in, because this was a temporary thing, she was going to move back home eventually. “What the he ---” Before she was able to finish her sentence, she lost her balance, almost tripped and worse, she dropped her favorite pair of Miu Miu glasses. Her eyes widened in absolute horror, she immediately grabbed it from the ground and checked it. “Are you blind?” She asked angrily, sweeping the dirt on her sunglasses.

[carolinecarmichael]

carter-phillips:

“I guess that doesn’t exclusively apply to social media, though. Most people are pretending in their day to day life too, to some extent. As sad as that is. We all feel like we have something to hide….people who base their entire instagram profile around making themselves seem perfect probably have more than most,” she said, her tone turning serious for a few moments before she force out a little laugh. “God, you know those people who are so pretty, it’s just obvious that they got whatever they wanted and everything went their way, so they never had to develop a personality? Like, it’s like, you’re beautiful but….maybe some adversity would’ve made you at least minorly interesting.” 

“Definitely but it’s way easier to pretend on social media and create an illusion.” For a split second Caroline felt like she was having a conversation with one of her fellow psych majors, which was a blessing because it has been a while since the last she has had a stimulating conversation with an individual. “Which is sad because beauty fades eventually, it’s not something you can rely on forever.” As shallow as she was, Caroline was raised as an intellectual -- sure she appreciated finer things in life but she also knew she had to have other skills under her belt. 

[carolinecarmichael]

mary-elizabeth-hart:

Without looking Mary smooshed food in their direction, “Here-” they weren’t the best cook but they were doing their best, “Try this.”

“I will pass.” Caroline took a step back, pursing her lips together. “I don’t eat carbs. Especially cookies.”