someone asked if it bothers me
someone asked if it bothers me, the idea of him moving on.
it’s been a year and a half, 20 months, something like that. we are worlds apart. i don’t write to you when i write about you anymore. and yet, i am still unlearning the things you taught me to believe about myself because you were too weak to take responsibility for yourself.
i once read a quote somewhere, the type of quote that strikes you hard enough to write it down. you forget about it for months, years – until someone asks you a simple question: does it bother you, the idea of him moving on?
“no one can be ‘more’ than me, so he would be getting what he could handle: less.”
when a relationship ends, people – women – tend to say things like “i guess i just wasn’t enough for him.” we take responsibility. we shoulder the blame. we carry the weight of both parties’ feelings. we know how to do this; we’re well-trained.
i am not supposing that another woman is less than me simply because she may suit you better than i could. i know now – a year and a half, 20 months later – that i have always been too much for you. being too much for you is a medal of honor; losing you, a certificate of achievement.
i’m not angry anymore. i know things happen and people make mistakes. but you are the sort of man who prefers stagnation. you will stay in place and blame the scenery for passing you by. i can only hope she is the sort of woman who will someday outgrow you, too.
may we all strive to be too much for men who are far too little.
annaxmalina
pixelskylines
vaporwave
kianamaiart
blakekathryn
gummygunk
