Matt Damon's false demise
Matt Damon disappeared for awhile a few weeks ago, and I was devastated. And when I say he disappeared for "awhile," I mean a day and a half. And I was in tears for that day and a half!
It all started when he followed me all the way to the primary school where I was going to teach Zinduka. I was nervous about him following me, because the kids might throw rocks at him or hurt him in some way, but I couldn't shake 'im. So we got to the school, I went inside the classroom, and the last I saw him was in the courtyard of the school...
Later, I returned home in hopes he'd already be there, but he wasn't. A few hours later, I started calling....EVERYONE. My poor friends. "Matt Damon hasn't come home, do you think he's okay?" "He followed me to the school and didn't come back... what would he be doing for so long??"
I'll tell you what he was doing. GETTING LAID, that little slut! I actually don't know for a fact, but I wouldn't be surprised if some tiny black kittens start popping out of 35 different cats around the vill.
Anyway, back to me freaking out. Everyone had to comfort me, try and assure me that he'd come home, and I went to bed for a restless sleep, constantly waking up hoping to hear his little squeak asking to come in. The next morning I walked to the school and back, in hopes that he would hear me... I've never really dealt with cats before (I've had them, but never close relationships with them) so I don't really know what to do when they disappear. As for dogs, I know you go after them...which is what I did. To no avail. So that whole day I sat at home crying off and on, so pathetically upset that he was gone. I was convinced he wasn't coming back! Then Jane got back from town, so I met her and helped carry her bags home, and I told her Matt Damon was lost.
Her immediate response? "Oh, some people probably just ate him."
Umm, excuse me? I was mortified. I was like "No, I love him! I don't want them to eat him!" and she laughed, and laughed. In my face. About my probably-eaten-cat (who she calls Mack because Tanzanians can never pronounce names correctly, even their own. Other people spell/say Jane's name as "Jeni"). So she made a few calls to the headmaster and teachers, telling them to be on the lookout for Cate-y's "big, fat cat" ...because to be quite honest, Matt Damon would be the tastiest cat in the village, seeing as he's the best fed. I actually wasn't too surprised when Jane told me he'd probably been eaten, because I mean, him compared to a stray skinny cat? Hellooo, obvious choice.
So I continued my crying at home, called my parents and shakily told them "MY VILLAGERS ATE MATT DAMON" and went to bed very depressed. I had all these fantasies... never trusting my villagers ever again...resenting them, suspiciously eyeing each one, wondering "Was it you? Were YOU the one who ate my sweet Matt Damon???" and then eventually quitting Peace Corps early, and in future job interviews, when they ask "So what made you end your Peace Corps service?" and my deadpan response: "My villagers ate my cat."
Then, the next morning at 6 a.m. I got up to get ready to catch the bus into town. I was in my kitchen standing at the table, when I hear a little squeak behind me. Unbelieving, I turn around, and lo and behold: Matt Damon! I shouted "MY SWEET BABY!" and scooped him up and nuzzled his dirty, dusty fur as he pawed my face away. I poured him a shit ton of dagaa (dried small fish) and unwillingly went to wait for the bus into town, longingly staring back at my house for my still-alive fat cat.
I'm pretty sure my villagers now know that he is definitely off limits. When I got back from town the other day, someone had entered my courtyard to weed it and left a bowl of food for him! So sweet.
He's still doing well! I'm hoping he will live a long, healthy life and will hopefully go to another volunteer after I leave.
