Ok so I've been reading lots of opinions on the 5h/Camila drama and I'm looking forward to reading yours because you've been in the fandom for as long as I have ~2012 feels~. I have no idea why but I always liked your take on things because it's always very down to earth and rational. You can use this ask to rant or not, you can answer privately or not, your call. Oh, and it's alright if you don't want to :) Ok sorry to bother bye ^^
Thatās really awesome of you to ask. Iāve been away from tumblr, for various reasons lol but I just had to see what people were saying about all the drama recently. It ended up a bit long, so Iāll add the break. Keep reading if it tickles your fancy lol.
I just had an intense but healthy conversation with my ex-girlfriend, who is still a very close friend. We met because of 5H and because of the 5H fanfiction blog, so we both have made investments in this group and we both have grown together with the girls themselves. Iāll get to that convo in a bit.Ā
When the initial announcement came out, Iāll be straight with you, I was fucking sad (still am) and a little bit angry. But reminding myself that Iām a rational person, I waited to hear from Camila herself before coming to any conclusion. Her letter sounded like her, genuine and real. Ok, but theyāre contradicting each other. Whatās actually going on? So Iām thinking, this is Maverick wanting Camila to look bad, beating her to the punch. Fuck them. Then I hear the audio leak of Lauren talking to Ally. Regardless of when it actually took place, Lauren at one point felt like this, and Iām guessing to a certain degree, the other girls as well. Well, management has all of them handcuffed and gagged obviously.Ā
So Iām trying to take everything in but then Fifth Harmony releases their second statement. I literally was like, what the fuck is this? I really didnāt know how to feel after reading it. It made me more confused than before. I read it a few times over and to be completely honest, it sounded petty, unnecessary, and unprofessional. I donāt think there was any reason for them to divulge that information. To what? Make it look like it was all on Camila? Which it did. Again, this has management written all over it.Ā
But as Iām going through tumblr, twitter, and instagram later on the next day, Iām reading things that are changing my mind. If what they did say is false, than thatās slander, in which case Camila can sue. I personally donāt think Camila would want to do that herself but Iām sure her team would. And Maverick/Epic/Syco/the girls themselves, would not release anything that would cost them a lawsuit. So Iāve made up my mind that what they did say happened. BUT it still makes them look super petty and salty af to be honest. I canāt hate Camila for wanting to leave. She obviously felt strongly about taking care of herself first before splitting up the biggest girl group on the planet right now. Thatās not something you decide on a whim. At the end of the day, she is being true to herself and sometimes that results in collateral damage. At the same time, if the other girls do feel some resentment/jealousy/bitterness, Ā I canāt blame them for feeling that either. I donāt think the natural reaction is going to be them jumping for joy when this involves your livelihood as well. It would have been great, if all they said was,Ā āWeāre very sad Camila is leaving, but we wish her only the bestā and leave it at that. But they clearly felt something different and felt compelled to share it with us. There are two sides to every story, and as much as we like to think it, we donāt know what happened behind closed doors. We can speculate all we want to but we just donāt know.Ā
Going back to the convo with my ex, she has completely sided with Camila. She has valid reasons and I totally understand her perspective and where sheās coming from. I, however, donāt feel the exact same way. I was asking myself why I donāt feel stronger about this, about picking a side. I know that sounds juvenile, but my ex and I were almost always on the same page with whatever drama happened in the fandom, so I needed some answers lol. I then went to my good friend Liz who is also in the fandom and my co-admin of the fic blog. Probably one of the most rational, level headed people I know. She gave me her thoughts which I agreed with. She gave points to both sides and so I came to a conclusion.Ā
What I do know is that I love these girls with all my heart. I went to 8 different shows, two in another country (Buffalo/Michigan) and one 6 hours away (Montreal). I spent about $2000 on meet and greets. I bought all their songs and Iām that person that downloads music from torrents (well, before Apple Music lol). I run a fan fiction blog dedicated to them and I just turned 31 years old. Iām not ashamed to say that lol. Iāve given a lot to these girls since The X Factor. I gained so many friends because of them. I found my first love because of them. I canāt just simply hate one of them or some of them. I just canāt let go. My ex has said goodbye to 5H but thatās ok too. She believes what she believes and I admire her for standing behind her convictions. Do I wish Camila wanted to stay? Of course, but Iāve decided to support all 5 of them because thatās what my heart is telling me to do. I donāt want to carry any negative feelings towards any of them because theyāve given me so many positive ones. Iāve seen so much hate thrown in both directions from fans and it honestly makes me sick.Ā
I came because of Lauren, stayed because of Camren, but ultimately fell deeply in love with 0T5.Ā I just canāt turn my back on any of them.
Iām teetering in the middle, like a good Canadian lmao. If that makes me a fence-sitter than so be it. Iāve chosen not to choose.Ā
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