I’m sick of this bit. Goodnight everybody
Keni

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Misplaced Lens Cap
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@cedarnewsprobablyofficial
I’m sick of this bit. Goodnight everybody
I missed the upcoming news yesterday but I don’t give a fuck get your own news.
I don’t even know what happened this week bro I dissociated on Monday and only came to this morning. I’ll just let that one guy that comments under every post I make explain what happened and hope he’s trustworthy.
Cedar Shoals’ very own Zachary Lynch has won a national art competition with the masterpiece posted above! Congratulations Zach, and good luck in the Semi-Finals!
Sorry for not giving out upcoming news for the week I got into a duel and had to spend the day in the hospital.
Monday - Last day of break
Tuesday - We’re back…. yay……
Wednesday - Advisement?
Thursday - Probably something idk
Friday - It’s OVER. There is NOTHING left in the week.
Alright so recap from this week!
Monday - No one was here
Tuesday - No one was here
Wednesday - No one was here
Thursday - I was hungover so idk
Friday - No one was here
The entire building burned down. This is 100% serious.
Upcoming Event’s at Cedar:
Monday: Nobody’s there
Tuesday: Nobody’s there
Wednesday: Nobody’s there
Thursday: Nobody’s there
Friday: Nobody’s there
Very helpful, I know. Have a great week (not being) at the shoals!
We’re updating the News Schedule.
Instead of being Daily News this outlet will instead cover Weekly News on Monday for Upcoming, Saturday for Recapping, and days in which Breaking News has occurred.
Of course, the breaking news will be a mix of our typical 100% legitimate and serious news (as always) and actual events happening around Cedar.
Oh hey I'm back. Sorry for the lack of 100% Reliable News I got fucking shot by my Math Final.
So what'd I miss? We're gonna go day-by-day starting on the 10th!
10th. There's an EOC Today, think it’s ELA this time
11th. Orchestra Concert TONIGHT in the Auditorium! Wish them luck I GUESS. Idk not that “Madeline” kid.
12th. Band Concert TONIGHT! Wish them luck!
13th. This just in! We’re starting the gay holocaust.
14th. My editor said I shouldn’t have posted that. Oh well what’s he gonna do? Fire me!? I’ll put a noose around my neck.
15th. Almost done. I hate this damn place.
16th. Wish me luck on my test tomorrow.
17th. WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!?!?!? HOLY SHIT BRO I’M GONNA DO IT!!1!1!!!111!!!1!1!!11!!au!1ghwhfhfufhtghfauwqoifbwkwldlheben
18th. This one wasn’t actually that bad. It was a damn project of course it wasn’t.
19th. WE’RE FREE LETS FUCKING GO!!!!!!!!!
20th. Don’t worry guys I have lots of ideas of news!
21st. Like clubs collecting members
22nd. Or clubs collecting more members
23rd. Help I’m out of news
24th. Christmas Eve tonight! Make sure to leave out your milk and cookies, Santa loves his cookies. Oh! And don’t forget the Carrots for his Reindeer.
25th. I got coal. Anyways, on an actual note, Merry Christmas and thank you my three followers for reading the Daily Cedar News.
26th. Clarke Announces Renovations. What are they? We’re removing the bathrooms. No shitting no pissing.
The 27th gets its own post, because it actually IS the 27th today.
There’s EOC’s today, ELA I think. Really helpful to know at 12:35 PM, I know.
Literally no one follows this account I could just start spouting out bullshit and no one would care.
The Athens Christmas Parade is tonight!
To everyone participating, please remember to bundle up nice and warm. Try your hardest to at least remember some gloves.
That’s all! Good luck tonight!
We have actual news today!
1. Did you know we have a golf team? I sure as hell didn’t.
Sign up during lunch today!
2. ROTC donated over a thousand cans in the can drive.
Forgot to post yesterday but we’re back in school now. How lovely.
Thanksgiving Break is OVER. We’re just in a weekend now.
Happy Thanksgiving!