Goodbye Weekend

just trying to navigate life and my emotions ;P

[ceepi]

i still hope one day i'll close my eyes and wake up and realise my entire life has been a dream or a bad trip

[ceepi]

all i've ever wanted was someone who makes living worth it.

i've tried people, i've tried pets, i've tried interests, i've tried making people up.

nothing is good enough, it's a lost cause really. i don't know why i still fight so hard to stay here.

[ceepi]

confession: i don't even like cutting myself.

i'm scared of going too deep and it's uncomfortable when it hurts.

doesn't mean i'm ever going to stop. haven't liked it for the 6 years i've been doing it. it looks nice tho and the feeling of euphoria after makes me feel like i can do anything

[ceepi]

hehehe i've been alone for so long this is exactly what ive wanted

going to drink w a friend in a few days lets hope i don't start venting. then again, doing so never brings any change so whatever. maybe it's better for them to get tired of my sadness

[ceepi]

ughhhhh why did i delete all the depressing ass photos i had in the name of "recovery" and moving on

i've lost that part of the past now, it remains only in my memory

[ceepi]

realising how much of a bitch people will accept you being is so freeing

i don't have to subordinate myself to others, i can be outright mean and that won't make them hate me

[ceepi]

walking around with fresh cuts is so exhilarating

no, i'm not going to show them to you or tell you about them but oh, if my jacket were to slip and you'd care enough to press me about them...

(( _ _ ))..zzzZZ

[ceepi]

when i think someone's my soulmate but they don't dream of codependancy

[ceepi]

SAW FIGHT CLUB IN THE CINEMA YAYY!!! GENUINELY BEST DAY OF MY LIFE I LOVE FIGHT CLUB IT WAS SO COOLLLLL!!!!

[ceepi]

bitches be all about femcels until i'm fat, depressed, don't speak unless spoken to, hate leaving the house and don't want to fix myself _(:3 」∠)_

[ceepi]

i realise i'm going to end up alone and i think i'm fine with that

[ceepi]

so much happening in my head recently..

people are acting very strange and off. i don't like it. when did everything change?

[ceepi]

at least neither my phone nor substances will find someone better than me

[ceepi]

theres too much going on i just want a moment in which everything goes back to the way it was (　˙-˙　)

[ceepi]

I want to be everything all at once

[ceepi]

japan 2026 except make it travelling to a random lake on the other side of your shitty little country

[ceepi]

real life is so hard...

so much drama and work. i much prefer spending my time online or at least locked in my room (ノ_＜)