i hate that ive been getting so triggered lately im so exhausted

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@ceeptsd
i hate that ive been getting so triggered lately im so exhausted
It’s been a long day
im so exhausted and i am so close to snapping
i don’t know why im so fucking sad today but here we are
crazy how one life change triggers my entire body into believing it’s actively dying
why does my insomnia always get worse when i have to be up early
hey idk how to articulate this part of being mentally ill but basically i feel like my life has been stolen from me in the most literal way and i can’t explain it without sounding like im making a million pathetic excuses
i feel. like an afterthought.
weird new feeling. not aware i was dreaming in the lucid sense. but being desperate for it to be a dream because i would rather die than it be real.
mmmmm insomnia night because this week is so busy and i cannot stop thinking about how exhausted im gonna be by the end of it
tried so hard to love christmas but now its here and its a busy week when im already feeling shitty and i just want to disappear lol
mmmmm insomnia night because this week is so busy and i cannot stop thinking about how exhausted im gonna be by the end of it
im! so! annoyed!
having a very i hate everything about myself and everyone else probably does too kind of night
i would give literally anything to not be like this
having a very i hate everything about myself and everyone else probably does too kind of night
im so fucking tired of this
im so fucking pissed off and hurt but it doesn’t matter it never matters