watched a video on LIMERANCE from the yt channel crafttochrist...
this may help someone else on their walk with God, if you relate to being a lovergirl 🌹
ever since i was a child i watched disney movies and would fantasize/romanticise the idea of a guy who would come to save me.
it was programming we all have had since childhood - basically every song is about relationships, breakups, toxic exes. finding this prince was the pinnacle of my existence, that if i didn't find him, there was something wrong with me.
i began maladaptive daydreaming, ESPECIALLY during covid. they originated from fantasy worlds from books/series i'd consume, imagining a guy sweeping me off my feet and most of all, protecting me.
growing up as the eldest made me observe my family. my parents are wonderful people who i love, but especially my father, his anger/yelling fits, even at minor things, lead me to feel unsafe, fearful and the peacemaker in my family.
at a retreat recently, the priest in a spiritual conversation with me brought up my father without me ever telling him. "i don't know of your relationship with your father.." he said. "but God loves you very deeply," another priest had said to me in confession.
i cried about a recent fight to my God a few nights ago, crying, asking for an answer. if im being truthful, as i cried it felt like God was far from me at one point. like i was alone. how clever of the enemy to try trick me of this.
these fantasy ideas of men and my distrust of real-life men is because i didn't have an example of a patient, gentle man. these fantasy ideas i battle with frequently, through fiction/music/daydreaming is the enemy trying to keep me STUCK in fantasy and harden my heart. Keeping me stuck in LIES. not reality.
i would entertain men's validation of me, which were always lustful not loving, to feel accepted.
when satan has you stuck in your head - you listen to him and not God. When you don't release control of everything, even love, to God, it comes from a place of fear and lack rather than the power and faith in God. God cannot bring you blessings when you return to these lies and whisperings of the devil.
Lord Jesus, please remove the veiling from my eyes, release the bondage of past experiences and lies of the enemy. Lead me to be open to your blessings in the PRESENT and not to dwell on imagination. Allow me to be receptive to YOUR voice, YOUR will and NOT any others. You are TRUTH Jesus, and you have plans for me better than I could EVER imagine !!! ❤️🔥
I feel especially as teen girls/young women we deal with this limerance loop ALOT and it stems from past traumas/experiences or just plain consumption. As daughters of the Most High we walk by faith, we have our perfect loving Father that only wants GOOD for us. 🌹
I wanted to share this REALISATION.
Isaiah 64:8 New Living Translation
"Father to the fatherless, defender of widows — this is God, whose dwelling is holy"
