ماہ نور

My name means moonlight

[chaandkeeroshni]

One year without seeing you in this dunyaa - the realm im still in, and you’ve now crossed.

I miss you over here, but I’m happy you’ve crossed and are in divine embrace - as I trust it.

Just want you to know, I live for you, and the way you would’ve wanted me to live. And in that way, I preserve you, I become you. that’s how I honour you, with every heartbeat.

And will continue to do so.

Love you Dada. Thanks for everything. Be in peace always. ❤️

بِسْمِ اللّٰهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِیْمِ

اَلْحَمْدُ لِلّٰهِ رَبِّ الْعٰلَمِیْنَ(1) الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِیْمِ(2) مٰلِكِ یَوْمِ الدِّیْنِﭤ(3) اِیَّاكَ نَعْبُدُ وَ اِیَّاكَ نَسْتَعِیْنُﭤ(4) اِهْدِنَا الصِّرَاطَ الْمُسْتَقِیْمَ(5) صِرَاطَ الَّذِیْنَ اَنْعَمْتَ عَلَیْهِمْ ﴰ غَیْرِ الْمَغْضُوْبِ عَلَیْهِمْ وَ لَا الضَّآلِّیْنَ(7)

[urgetocreate]

Adam Clague (American b.1982), Cara Oranges and Coffee, 2022, Oil on board

[gholdic]

[chaandkeeroshni]

My toxic trait is I have the ability to be absolutely disgusted and icked out at a person I once loved

[chaandkeeroshni]

Lowkey always wanted to land here right here

[chaandkeeroshni]

It was always supposed to be you

[chaandkeeroshni]

Lowkey always wanted to land here right here

[chaandkeeroshni]

I’m growing to love life in Lahore a bit too much I’m afraid I may never wanna go back

[hayalperestkedy]

[chaandkeeroshni]

[chaandkeeroshni]

What a crazy day

[chaandkeeroshni]

I wonder how many times does a woman go through a burial in her heart

sometimes she buries versions of herself

to accommodate those around her,

sometimes she buries people themselves, as they are,

apparently still alive, still breathing

some have to bury their own family while they still live,

and sometimes she buries you yourself so she can still live with you,

for if you were to remain alive in her heart,

it would consume her full,

and the above all else, the world demands shelves too, still,

because there’s no honour in suicide,

So she buries versions of her and you both, so she can live,

it’s wrapped up so well though,

the best kinds of burials happen within a woman’s life,

Wrapped up in grace, gher daari, ornaments, jewels and beauty,

femininity, covering up all the burials

And I wonder how long until I burry you too

Or did I already do that,

And it’s your corpse I now make peace with

because there’s only so much you can blame or

Feel disappointed in a corpse

For its already

sort of

dead.

[natkhat-sa-shyam]

Btw i'd still kiss you if u were sick knowing i could get sick too

[chaandkeeroshni]

My dearest Grandfather

Of all people in the world, God chose for me to carry your nose

Your stress and anger lines on the forehead

For whenever I get irritated at someone, my face

naturally shows the lines on the forehead

and right above nose

just as yours did,

the nose rises and squeezes naturally,

in annoyance and irritation,

just like you.

God chose for me to carry your blood,

your legacy,

your passion,

your devotion,

and even why you believed in

I’ve seen so many but none like you,

in this entire world, God chose for me to carry this love for you that I don’t for anyone else,

and love for you connects me with All Else that’s my purpose

I love you now, I loved you then, and I’ll love you always,

[chaandkeeroshni]

Sometimes I hate people around me with all my guts

[chaandkeeroshni]

I’m growing to love life in Lahore a bit too much I’m afraid I may never wanna go back

[chaandkeeroshni]

Being Shia is not any easy life. The more you sincerely delve into history and the more you tread the Shia path, the more connected you become to the Ahlul Bayt.

You start putting them over your family, over people you love, over yourself.

All else blurs out.

And the more you connect with them, the more grief your life becomes filled with. And it no longer remains about Muharram and Safr only - their remembrance doesn’t leave your heart all year long.

Sometimes you may want to intentionally not dive deep, you’re human after all. And the grief and pain are too intense to feel.

Maybe that’s why some resort to zanjeer. Some may judge it, but I feel like, it’s a state of utmost devotion and restlessness both. It’s like saying: My Maula, if you were in pain, so we will be.

Maula never asked them to do this, but they do it regardless. I think the sincere Shia is the most unconditionally devoted person I’ve seen, for they do it all just for Maula, and for love, and not really asking for anything in return.

To hear people say: Maula, aapkee Sakina per meri Sakina qurbaan.

To push our fathers and brothers and husbands to give their bodies to this cause, if needed.

Kya aapki Shaan hai, Maula. Being YOUR Shia is the biggest gift of my life; the biggest gem.

[chaandkeeroshni]

In the name of my Dada, the first Shia revert in generations. The man with the biggest courage I’ve seen. May you be blessed wherever you are, and may all my rewards go to you. Elahi Ameen.

[chaandkeeroshni]

My biggest purpose in life is to continue your legacy. All else is nothing in front of this.

Thank you for making me, a wandering soul, one with purpose. I’m a nobody without you. And I’ll never stop honouring you.

[chaandkeeroshni]

Being Shia is not any easy life. The more you sincerely delve into history and the more you tread the Shia path, the more connected you become to the Ahlul Bayt.

You start putting them over your family, over people you love, over yourself.

All else blurs out.

And the more you connect with them, the more grief your life becomes filled with. And it no longer remains about Muharram and Safr only - their remembrance doesn’t leave your heart all year long.

Sometimes you may want to intentionally not dive deep, you’re human after all. And the grief and pain are too intense to feel.

Maybe that’s why some resort to zanjeer. Some may judge it, but I feel like, it’s a state of utmost devotion and restlessness both. It’s like saying: My Maula, if you were in pain, so we will be.

Maula never asked them to do this, but they do it regardless. I think the sincere Shia is the most unconditionally devoted person I’ve seen, for they do it all just for Maula, and for love, and not really asking for anything in return.

To hear people say: Maula, aapkee Sakina per meri Sakina qurbaan.

To push our fathers and brothers and husbands to give their bodies to this cause, if needed.

Kya aapki Shaan hai, Maula. Being YOUR Shia is the biggest gift of my life; the biggest gem.

[chaandkeeroshni]

In the name of my Dada, the first Shia revert in generations. The man with the biggest courage I’ve seen. May you be blessed wherever you are, and may all my rewards go to you. Elahi Ameen.