Charlie Illea @charlie-illea - Tumblr Blog

So now that you've crawled back to Mackenzie will you change your bio?

Unfortunately

Don’t crawl back to her, crawl back in between my thighs

I am a somewhat devoted husband so no

You weren’t devoted when you got me pregnant.

That didn’t happen.

Explain the child.

Well, when a man and a woman love each other very much…

Well, when a fuck boy named marid is sad, and a woman he’s taking advantage of have sex, they have a kid, doesn’t change the fact that the sex happened and now part of my child is yours.

No. This didn’t happen. Let’s call Jerry Springer.

IT DID! fine let’s call him, I would never sleep with anyone but you so I’m certain she’s yours.

Unless God wills it.

You know what, I’m done with this. I’m going to get high and die. Goodbye.

Daddy don't die!

So now that you've crawled back to Mackenzie will you change your bio?

Unfortunately

Don’t crawl back to her, crawl back in between my thighs

I am a somewhat devoted husband so no

You weren’t devoted when you got me pregnant.

That didn’t happen.

Explain the child.

Well, when a man and a woman love each other very much…

Well, when a fuck boy named marid is sad, and a woman he’s taking advantage of have sex, they have a kid, doesn’t change the fact that the sex happened and now part of my child is yours.

No. This didn’t happen. Let’s call Jerry Springer.

Daddy stop ignoring me! I'm your child!

So now that you've crawled back to Mackenzie will you change your bio?

Unfortunately

Don’t crawl back to her, crawl back in between my thighs

I am a somewhat devoted husband so no

You weren’t devoted when you got me pregnant.

That didn’t happen.

Explain the child.

Well, when a man and a woman love each other very much…

Well, when a fuck boy named marid is sad, and a woman he’s taking of have sex, they have a kid, doesn’t change the fact that the sex happened and now part of my child is yours.

Yeah daddy! I'm yours!

So now that you've crawled back to Mackenzie will you change your bio?

Unfortunately

Don’t crawl back to her, crawl back in between my thighs

I am a somewhat devoted husband so no

You weren’t devoted when you got me pregnant.

That didn’t happen.

Explain the child.

Yeah explain me then!

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

NO. THIS IS NOT A THING

Ha she’s crazy Madrid. And she’s all yours.

NO NO NO TAKE ME BACK I’M JUST A DRUNK BABY PLEASE

Daddy why are you denying my existence???

I’m not your daddy. I’m Mackenzie’s daddy but okay

But daddy, how does that work? You can’t be her daddy she’s older than you!

There’s also a reason for global warming and I don’t see that being discussed. Also, let’s talk about Trump.

Trump? I’d rather talk about how you need to get your rump into your daughters life!

Great pun, Ashley

Thank you, I thought it was a very good pun, but still the point was needed to say!

Yes that is a good point. Come back to me daddy!

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

NO. THIS IS NOT A THING

Ha she’s crazy Madrid. And she’s all yours.

NO NO NO TAKE ME BACK I’M JUST A DRUNK BABY PLEASE

Daddy why are you denying my existence???

I’m not your daddy. I’m Mackenzie’s daddy but okay

Well… Yeah

Well will you explain it to me?

Well… No

Daddy! This lady who says you’re her daddy too is being mean to me!

Don’t call me daddy. I’m not your daddy and the internet ruined that for me so

But you are my daddy!

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

NO. THIS IS NOT A THING

Ha she’s crazy Madrid. And she’s all yours.

NO NO NO TAKE ME BACK I’M JUST A DRUNK BABY PLEASE

Daddy why are you denying my existence???

I’m not your daddy. I’m Mackenzie’s daddy but okay

Well… Yeah

Well will you explain it to me?

Well… No

Daddy! This lady who says you're her daddy too is being mean to me!

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

NO. THIS IS NOT A THING

Ha she’s crazy Madrid. And she’s all yours.

NO NO NO TAKE ME BACK I’M JUST A DRUNK BABY PLEASE

Daddy why are you denying my existence???

I’m not your daddy. I’m Mackenzie’s daddy but okay

Well… Yeah

Well will you explain it to me?

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

NO. THIS IS NOT A THING

Ha she’s crazy Madrid. And she’s all yours.

NO NO NO TAKE ME BACK I’M JUST A DRUNK BABY PLEASE

Daddy why are you denying my existence???

I’m not your daddy. I’m Mackenzie’s daddy but okay

But daddy, how does that work? You can’t be her daddy she’s older than you!

Uh, no. Reason.

No! There's a reason for everything! There has to be! Like the reason that you keep ignoring me.

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

NO. THIS IS NOT A THING

Ha she’s crazy Madrid. And she’s all yours.

NO NO NO TAKE ME BACK I’M JUST A DRUNK BABY PLEASE

Daddy why are you denying my existence???

I’m not your daddy. I’m Mackenzie’s daddy but okay

But daddy, how does that work? You can't be her daddy she's older than you!

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

Mommy????

It’s okay sweetie, just go back to bed, I’ll get our child support.

Mommy, Where’s daddy???

Daddy is right there, he’ll tuck you in later tonight

I'm not going to bed until he does, ok?

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

NO. THIS IS NOT A THING

Ha she’s crazy Madrid. And she’s all yours.

NO NO NO TAKE ME BACK I’M JUST A DRUNK BABY PLEASE

Only if you bring home McDonald’s

ANYTHING. NOT MY CHILD. I DON’T WANT BLONDE CHILDREN

But you have me and I’m blonde…..

Its okay sweetie, you don’t have to get his recognition, if he wants to be an abandoning drunk father he can be. Mommy will handle this

Love you mommy! But daddy should recognise me because I know he told you that he wanted blonde kids, and now he has me! His dreams have come true!

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

NO. THIS IS NOT A THING

Ha she’s crazy Madrid. And she’s all yours.

NO NO NO TAKE ME BACK I’M JUST A DRUNK BABY PLEASE

Only if you bring home McDonald’s

ANYTHING. NOT MY CHILD. I DON’T WANT BLONDE CHILDREN

But you have me and I'm blonde.....

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

NO. THIS IS NOT A THING

Ha she’s crazy Madrid. And she’s all yours.

NO NO NO TAKE ME BACK I’M JUST A DRUNK BABY PLEASE

Daddy why are you denying my existence???

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.

Mommy????

It’s okay sweetie, just go back to bed, I’ll get our child support.

Mommy, Where's daddy???

@ashley-fucking-illea you hot babe ;)

Thanks, hmu, I don’t care about your wedding ring 😘

I will

I’m so glad you’ve ‘cum’ to realize I can satisfy your thirst better than your wife 😗

Uhhh

Remember why you married me Hun

Who are you again?

Don’t give me that

You see why we left our son now?

I wish I could leave him in the woods

Actually last time you left him in the woods we fucked, so I’m pretty sure that’s not what you wish :)

You can have him

Good thing we had no kids

That’s what you think😉

Well, fuck

MAHAHAHA

I’m not the father unless they’re blonde

But your not blonde, and I’m not blonde, so really the only way the could NOT be yours is if they’re blonde.

NOT IF THEY’RE MINE

Do you know how pregnancy works?

Yes, because I am, and I saved myself for marid

Do I need to go through the birds and the bees with you?

No, I fucked marid before you were married, and since then there has been no period.

We only got married like 2 weeks ago…

Pretty sure it’s been longer than that, hun

Long enough for me to have a baby of yours.