Delu

There are too many delusions in my head to keep them locked.（・Ａ・） Language: rus/eng, 19 y.o.

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Why the fic writing community around tbhk isnt so big? You have all the archetypes needed, but as far as it goes there are only mlm pairings... like damn, it was like that LONG BEFORE the hiatus. Is it because you cant write smut with the most of the cast?

[ikohiki]

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Idgf i wont stop talking about it, GOD its GORGEOUS!!

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My take on smut in yandere fanfiction. CW: Implication of noncon usage in works, hate.

I'll be absolutely honest I am a hater.

Especially when in any yandere fanfiction smut that opposes consent is NOT used as a horror trope. You can do so much with it, but noo it will be a corn bait, i dont understand what so appealing people find in suffering and yeah it can be used as a way to safely selfharm, like angst, when you feel bad, or hot sause, that literally burns your mouth. But when people are trying to sell me "buldak" as gummy noodles the only thing i feel is dissapointment. I was reading the whole fic for NOTHING, theres no physical or emotional pain you cant even feel pleasure, i dont even feel betrayal, i feel NOTHING and thats the worst. The fact that i spent 2 hours reading the work makes me ignore any Yandere fics with smut in it at the start

Talk about an apple with an orange skin. We all can see what you are trying to be but you are not and you dont even know it, but it needs to stop.

Pure romanticization, honestly, is not even enjoyable.

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Wanted to share my Phos art i made recently...

Here ya go!! :3

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I love the idea of the moon as your lover with whom you dont share a marriage with and never will. ⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ You may share bed with them in times when you feel cold and empty. It may be a time of day, month or even a year. Holding their hand and singing praises to them like you are the sole inhabitants of the whole universe, filling warmth of your palm sip into their fingertips. It doesnt matter. The amount of love you pursue them with is meaningless, because you both know that in the end you will grow apart and the end is near. It was expected from the way they never showed you their bad side, if there even was one it must've be on their back which they never turned to you with. Absolute need to control your emotinal state and flow could be the sign you needed, only if you were really searching for any signs. Alas, your eyes have been blinded by the glow reflected from everyone you ever looked up to.

The whole ordeal wont last long enough for you to grasp the moment of the final goodbye. It will be a nice evening with even nicer night filled with anticipation to meet again that wil never be resolved. On the next day they disappeared as if they had never existed. ⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹

A better idea: Moon is your lover that shares bed and warmth with you while you are married to your abuisve partner -- sun. You cant leave them, neither sun nor moon, if you will leave sun = your kids will be endangered, if you leave moon you'll go crasy from loneliness.

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⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ Everytime Phos gets more trauma she gets more attractive. Deal with me!

⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹

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!Food for thought. Implied to be ABOUT gojo x reader, but not about it specifically!

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dont think most of Satoru Gojo's fans understand his inability to participate in romantic relationship as an equal/part of it.

To understand what i mean ill have to explain the nuances that come with the relationship themselves. You need to put a large amount of trust for a relationship be it with many people or just a one person to WORK, not exist, ACTUALLY WORK. Compliments, flirting, spending time together, taking time to understand someones passions and hobbies, just as inside jokes, it has to mean something. With gojo? He cant put himself into this position.

Its not about him being "too strong", his partner being "too weak" or the risks of being a literal soldier 24/7 (24/6, if he's lucky) with a lover to him or his partner themselves. Its about his inability to:

1) Being weak himself

2) Let the love in his heart sip through him to make any actions driven by it at all.

So, he cant be weak, its a fact. Why? He was raised like this. And to understand it you actually have to grasp the IDEA of how soldiers are raised or how warfare makes it presence in ours mundane lives. It all starts with how men are raised to BE soldiers, they are devoid of empathy and the concurence between boys is praised, its made this way not only for the romanticization of fights, the way the winners climbe out as heroes no matter thir actions on the battlefield, but for the drainage of any empathy they could've had, so they wouldnt feel any simpathy to the other person in front of the gun, because they are weapons, their enemy = meat for the bullets. Satoru does great job evading it, but only half the way, he was raised without actual showcases of love, empathy or closure from his parents. He is praised for his destructive abilities and not those made to nurture those close to you. This way he cant show empathy towards his partner, be it a woman or a man, it doesnt matter, it would be the same thing in satosugu, there is no possible reason it wouldnt be like this. So even if its a hug he gives to his loved one, the empathy he presents is no different than the one he gives to the curse in front of his "hollow purple" hand gesture.

Why is it different with his adopted kiddos? Because he experienced their troubles himself, so empathy he has for them is pretty straightforward: He is a kid in jujutsu world, experienced n and m troubles -> they are kids in jujutsu world, THEY WILL EXPERIENCE N AND M TROUBLES. He knows how they feel. With romantic relationship? He doesnt know how his partner feels, he never had to fully experiece it himself because he cant be weak, thats why he cant open up fully and he cant feel the love in himself AND he doesnt know how... Kids actually look for examples of romatic relationship in interactions of their parents, which he cant replicate, i dont rhink he saw them love each other and he never had enough empathy to understand what they mean with those love driven actions anyways, thats one of the reasons why he couldnt just replicate them from the books, comics, other couples, etc.

Man cant be close in platonic way, because, yeah the same reason, he cant be weak, any close interaction with someone requires some amount of trust and by trusting someone you are putting yourself in a vulnerable position. Its showcased in his technique, especially when he grew up. Hes always on guard with it.

Somewhere gege says that Gojo cant date girls, because he cant trust them, cant form connections close enough. It actually proves my point, that he is his own problem in forming bonds, but some people (usually stsg fans, no offense, most of you are cool) water it down to suguru being his last significant connection (its bs, the closure went away, when geto couldnt keep up in stregth and satoru cant be weak himself, he needs someone to make him weak in difference like sukuna (stronger than him) or suguru (weaker)), other fans just forget about it all together...

Its a pity because even in self-insert ff, or x reader/oc ones it can be a huge food for imagination how to override it or how to make it insignificant. Ship ff-writers miss out on a huge layer of angst, its not about romantic partners, but friends too...

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Damn, WHAT a loser... all that ass for nothing

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If sun was a human being, it would be a type of partner with whom making a family is a deal of the century, but actually BEING its partner is hell. ⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ Its like they are non-existent, but you cant forget that they are here because you live in a home built by them, on their land, with their children. Its not like you have a choise in being in their palms, life on a tip of their fingers, when they don't even care. You were here from the start, all your life, but its not about age gap or worse. They have you, but they don't think about it. So much power its not a big deal to take care about your family so they simply don't notice it. Its not that bad! Speaking about comfort its an ideal greenhouse for children. The house feels like a palace, but not like a home. It doesn't when you notice their presence from room to room. Feels like you could stretch out your hand and touch them. A bad idea, implementing it - is a way to receive a scar or a disability. There is no empathy in these relationship. You may gain profit, not for long, not with a tickin timebomb for a spouse. ⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. ݁₊ ⊹

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Was making my theme right now... Sitting, searching and finding needed images was loooonhg, but fun! (next time i'll just make my own though)

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I wish i could write ff about Aha and trailblaiser as akivili, but im too lasy to come back in powercrept gacha game where story is written like war and peace with a pacific ocean in every dialogue... Life is tough...