...what?

I post stuff that gives me a good chuckle. Currently accepting music commissions: http://www.chineseviking.com

[chineseviking]

Hi.

Long time no see, suckers.

[i-am-a-fish]

everyone who reads this post will get some big spicy joy within 24 large minutes (hours)

[darknesshaspurplehair]

Ok y'all but like I’m not even kidding about this I read this post yesterday and today I got an email from the peeps at hamilton and I won the lotto gor $10 tickets and I would like to give all my thanks to the internet’s favorite fish, Goldie Gurston, for making this possible because I totally believe they did this with their amazing gay powers

[thuriweaver]

So I know this is likely a coincidence…but I reblogged this and just now discovered I’ve been given a $150 amazon gift card as a bonus at work. So thank you, fish!

[ren-allen]

If it worked for them I hope it works for everyone else

[em3rgence-st]

Some big spicy joy pls

[felixluvsketchup-deactivated202]

SOME BIG SPICY JOY PLEASE

[era-eclipsed-deactivated2019072]

Pleass

[rabdoidal]

twitter is having a normal one

[helloitsbees]

ALSO ken jennings the Jeopardy guy is the bean dad’s cohost on a podcast, and he’s been defending him while saying some inflammatory stuff, so there’s talk that it might cost him the position of future jeopardy host

[shittynewyorkercartooncaptions]

Cream of the Crap, 2020

[Follow us on Instagram]

[i-was-once-a--tortoise]

everything about this is fucking hilarious. i’m sorry, random pompeii man, but your death was some looney tunes bullshit and the framing of this photograph isn’t helping.

[russiawave]

[magistrate-of-mediocrity]

Those am him leafs

[weatherall]

#leaf him alone

[cookiescr]

Yknow the thing where red pandas just lay down on a branch and let their legs hang and they’re just like vibing

[cookiescr]

they’re just vibing yknow?

[dimpledgucci]

porcupines do this too :)

[callingallcars]

i have excellent news about the manul cat

[radwolf76]

Manul cat is an automatic reblog from me.

[lokeanrampant]

I am porcupine.

[krakensdottir]

Pretty much most cats that spend any time in trees, tbh

Honestly tho, in terms of lazy chill I don’t think anyone’s gonna beat this bear:

[floridensis]

look at this squirrel

by inaturalist user gregslak

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

the funniest vampire bullshit will forever be some vampire lamenting having to kill while theyre actively killing and monologuing like “truly, I am the most hated creature in god’s narrowed eye, the new modern prometheus, my purpose an eternal question, my existence a curse. is there a single person, even a fleeting thought, that has ever spent a moment beneath the same moon as I while feeling this unique pain? Pity me, world, for no one now is as miserable as I”

and the dude literally bleeding to death in the vampire’s arms, they never get a line, but if they did, it would probably be “okay now hold up if this is a contest about who’s having the worse fucking night,”

[garrettauthor]

How to trick a monkey.

[monkeysky]

ultimate legend posts

[whitepeopletwitter]

[glumshoe]

Theoretically I don’t object to the idea of Harley Quinn moving away from The Joker’s influence and having that reflected in her costume, but that’s… not what her character designers have done. They’ve dropped the clown theme for a design based on a skimpy cheerleading uniform in the same colors as her traditional costume. If Harley’s costume change is supposed to reflect a new idependence, it shouldn’t be based on her old costume at all and should be something new and cool to represent self-reinvention, not just “we didn’t think the clown theme was sexy enough to sell to a modern audience”.

HOWEVER. You know what would be fun? If Harley decided to out-clown the Joker and steal his theme from him. Commit to the act in a way he never could and actually take up classes on clowning and physical comedy. Become Dr. Harley Quinn, the DCU’s leading expert on being a clown. When people think “the clown from Gotham” they don’t think of The Joker at all. That would be sweet, sweet revenge that I would love to read.

[brawltogethernow]

“The clown from Gotham.” “Which one?” “The one who knows what she’s doing.”

“It’s that clown again.” “I thought he was in Metropolis this week?” “Clown as in clown, not clown as in embarrassment to humanity.” “Oh, the doctor.”

[phoenixyfriend]

Doctor Clown

[brawltogethernow]

(nodding) Doctor Clown.

[unfried-mouth-wheat]

Listen, if Toph had went off on her own for a while in Ba Sing Se there is no way she wouldn't vibe with Zuko.

"Welcome to Pao's Family tea shop, I'm Li, waddaya want?"

"Chaos."

"Understandable. Sadly, that's not on the menu. Would you settle for a cup of Jasmine tea?"

"Sure."

[unfried-mouth-wheat]

Jet, bursting into the tea shop: THOSE TWO ARE FIRE BENDERS! Toph, interrupting Zuko who is about go attack this mouth wheat boy: And where’s your proof? Jet, suspiciously: I saw the old man with a hot cup of tea right after he complained that it was cold? Toph, about to cause some chaos: Then clearly, you need your eyes checked. Toph, gesturing to Iroh: This man is a Water Bender.

[smolfrogi]

THIS MAN IS A WATERBENDER

[tiredalexanderr]

wait i wanna add to this - so toph can tell when people lie, right? so she can probably feel zuko's heart racing when jet accuses them of being firebenders. also, she would've met iroh by this point

so im imagining she's like "okay. 2 firebenders. in a shop in the earth kingdom. but the old man is nice and wants better things for his nephew so honestly this checks out. yeah im gonna meddle"

[unfried-mouth-wheat]

That is 100% the thought process

[the-turtleduck-pond]

Jet tries to argue that he heated his tea again.

“I know a waterbender and she can turn water into ice, who says they can’t make liquids hotter too?”

Jet has no argument.

[unfried-mouth-wheat]

He doesn’t have an argument cuz he knows the Water Bender Toph knows and has FELT her turn water to ice

Terror fills his body as he realizes that if Toph, who knows Katara, is friends with Li, then KATARA must be friends with Li TOO.

Toph can feel his fear, and she is living for it

[omghotmemes]

If April ends up worse I swear to God

[jackironsides]

Sure is something to read this post at the beginning of June.

[no1fan15]

It is September

[ginkgo-bilobas]

I was born in the late nineteen hundreds

[argumate]

only nineteen hundreds kids will remember these

[adhoption]

normal brain: I'm a '90s kid

big brain: I was born in the late nineteen hundreds

giant brain: I arose from the final years of the 20th century

galaxy brain: I was brought into this world amongst the dying breaths of the second millennium AD, and grew amidst the warmth of its ashes

[argumate]

born some decades before the Calamity

[geniusoflove]

at level 20 of adhd you can read a book and listen to a podcast at the same time

[geniusoflove]

at level 40 you can read a transcript of a podcast while listening to an audiobook

[grimeygruel]

And you don't process any of it

[geniusoflove]

well of course not im thinking about something someone said to me 3 years ago that triggered my rejection sensitive dysphoria

[chjorniy-voron]

I MADE A BOOK!

It’s here! It’s hardcover! It’s all my work over the last five years!! Hans Vogel is Dead: Volume 1 is available on my online store!!

It’s 260 pages of full-color glory, plus translations, extra art, and historical notes!! Take a look!

My Shop || The Webcomic

[chjorniy-voron]

WE ARE DOWN TO FOUR!!!!! COPIES!!!!!! LEFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[littletetra]

When you’re stuck in a point and click adventure game: