homestuck? in a logical order? its more likely than you think!

[chronologicalhomestuck]

well. i am making this blog FAIRLY impulsively. but i have pondered it some. and the idea of doing this in general has been an idea ive had for a while. that idea being...rereading homestuck a shitton of times but from a different pov every time. see. i have the hs pov cam mod as a chrome extension (also available for uhsc). and i was like hey i might as well liveblog it.

i dont have a SUPER solid idea of what characters im gonna do so far. or what order. but im gonna start with karkat!

other resources:

homestuck5plus to format the text in my posts

let's read homestuck for playthroughs of walkarounds

this site for game dialogue transcripts

ruffle to watch flashes in full quality

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: part 10 (i am ditching the act thing for now because i dont want to keep track of that and it has reached the point of being a stupid thing to attempt)

whoops its been a while since i last posted here. graduated highschool, lazed around home to celebrate summer beginning, yknow how it is. when i last posted, karkat had just finished trolling john for the second time, at the point in time when john had just had a poorly timed vriska-induced nap that caused the creation of bec noir. i think i fumbled the cause-and-effect and chronology a bit in that post, but whateverrr the minute details are unimportant. im more interested in seeing what karkat is gonna toss my way next!

looks like jade is his next target of torment.

CG: HI AGAIN, IDIOT. GG: oh nooooooo CG: SO I GUESS TODAY IS FINALLY THE DAY YOU FUCK EVERYTHING UP. GG: >:O CG: IS THERE NOTHING I CAN DO TO CHANGE YOUR MIND?

oh, i saw someone point this out recently i think, but the parallel to calliope and jane's conversation here is pretty obvious

UU: good morning, lovely. ^u^ GG: Why, hellooooooo. UU: so i gUess today is finally the day yoU make everything better. GG: :B! [...] UU: is there nothing i can do to ease yoUr mind?

but back to jade and karkat! based on karkats messages and the timestamp, its the afternoon (13:04) of april 13th (in jade's timezone, at least, not that any of this matters much).

this conversation consists mostly of

karkat trying to contact the other most obviously responsible member of bec noir's creation

jade getting very mad at this guy! she blocked him already!! leave her alone!

jade blocking karkat again after just a few messages back and forth

from karkats pov this is quite funny.

like this is the entirety of this conversation. jade is already tired of him from conversations karkat hasnt had yet, and karkat is not getting off to a great foot!

i wonder if the way blocking works is that ... karkat wasnt blocked bc from his perspective he hadnt been blocked yet?? does that even work? what kinda paradox is this man ok. thats enough lingering on a 2 minute long conversation.

-- ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG] -- EB: karkat!!! EB: hey buddy, you were making me worried there... EB: are you ok? CG: WHAT IN THE NAME OF SWEET GLOBE TICKLING FUCK. CG: EGBERT, I JUST GOT DONE ERUPTING A WHOLE VOLCANO OF MERCILESS FUCK YOU ON THE PRIMITIVE VILLAGE LOCATED SQUARELY ON YOUR CROTCH. CG: ASSUMING THAT'S A SUITABLY TERRIBLE PART OF HUMAN ANATOMY FOR A VILLAGE IN JEOPARDY TO EXIST.

karkat receives a message from john out of nowhere. understandably, he is confused to receive such a caring check-in, given how their last conversation went.

CG: SHUT UP. HOW DARE YOU CONTACT ME WHILE I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF MY BACKWARDS MARCH OF HATE THROUGH YOUR TEDIOUS TIMELINE. EB: oh god, this is not right! EB: you aren't supposed to hate me anymore, you're supposed to be kinda my friend, sorta! EB: when is this? CG: WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHEN IS THIS CG: OK, LET ME JUST CHECK THE UNIVERSAL CLOCK WHICH KEEPS CONSISTENT TIME FOR ALL FRAMES OF REFERENCE AND ALL PLANES OF REALITY. CG: IT'S HALF PAST YOU'RE A MORON. EB: ok, duh! i know that. EB: i mean, how many times have you talked to me before? CG: WE JUST GOT DONE WITH OUR SECOND CONVERSATION. HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW THIS? EB: AUGH! EB: this isn't good, i need to talk to future you! CG: WHY EB: because it sounds like you're in trouble. EB: i think maybe you are running from jack? CG: OF COURSE WE'RE RUNNING FROM JACK, I JUST GOT DONE FUCKING TELLING YOU THAT.

everyone here is equally frustrated with the inconsistent timelines! karkat took a quick break to yell at jade that was interrupted by her blocking him and followed up by karkat getting these messages from a john looking for a future version of karkat. from karkats pov, these strike me as a bit ominous! obviously theyve already hidden from jack, but john makes it sound like he catches up and finds them. if i were karkat id be getting pretty worried abt what the future holds--not that theres much help in trying to avoid it!

EB: ultimate riddle shit? CG: I CAN TELL THIS CONVERSATION IS GOING TO BE A UTTER FUCKING JOY TO PARTICIPATE IN. CG: I HONESTLY ENVY ANYONE IN THE POSITION OF NOT HAVING TO PUT UP WITH READING IT. CG: BUT YOU ASKED FOR IT, JOHN, SO HERE WE GO. CG: ARE YOU READY EB: no, i just want to talk to future you. :( CG: NO YOU DON'T CG: TAKE IT FROM ME CG: THE GUY IS A BASTARD.

karkat starts attempting to make a point...but then makes the idiots boner of jumping back to troll a john...lets see...over 1500 pages in the past!

CG: SEE THIS IS A CASE IN POINT. EB: what point? CG: THE POINT I WAS JUST MAKING. CG: ABOUT THE ULTIMATE RIDDLE. CG: YOU BLITHERING FECULENT SHITHOLE. [...] EB: so what was the "case in point" you were making, anyway? CG: I WAS SCROLLING BACK AND NOTICED YOU WERE IN THE VEIL. EB: whoa, i am? CG: YEAH DUMBDUMB, YOU'RE TUMBLING AROUND ON A BIG GODDAMN METEOR.

seriously though karkat, what were you trying to achieve with that jump? im starting to think you might just be a bit of a dumbass on top of the shenanigans. maybe take another nap? you could really use the sleep!

EB: hey, i have an idea. EB: why don't you get back to me in a few minutes? EB: i mean like a few minutes of my time, not yours. EB: all of these little pink monkeys are getting way out of line and i have to tend to them. EB: if you message me in a couple minutes, we can continue conversing in a sane, linear fashion for a change! CG: UM, OK?

such a reasonable and logical idea!!! how about you try it?

CG: OK IT'S A FEW MINUTES LATER. CG: LOOK HOW SANE AND LINEAR WE ARE BEING. EB: yeah! CG: OK AWESOME, NOW FUCK YOU AND GOODBYE.

karkat...you strange little boy... how you enchant me.

CG: JOHN EGBERT, YOU HAVE ASSASSINATED MY PATIENCE. CG: ADIOS LOSER. EB: wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EB: get back to me in a couple minutes, ok? CG: SD;LKFJSD;LKFJSDLFKJ; CG: FINE.

SO ASTOUNDED BY THE MERE SUGGESTION OF MAINTAINING LINEARITY!

cmon, karkat, i believe in you! you can do it! keep this up!

you are doing so well bestie.

EB: what happens in our game that's different from yours that makes things go so badly? CG: JACK NOIR. EB: who is jack noir? CG: AN AGENT OF DERSE. CG: WHO FLIPPED OUT AND ROSE TO POWER. CG: HE KILLED YOUR BLACK QUEEN AND KING AND NOW HE'S IN CHARGE. EB: so you didn't have him in your game? CG: NO, WE DID. CG: BUT HE WAS HARMLESS. CG: ACTUALLY, HE WAS AN ALLY, SORT OF.

he stabbed you, karkat. multiple times. but sure, "harmless" is fine.

CG: THE WORST IS YET TO COME. CG: FOR YOU. EB: oh no! EB: what is the worst thing? CG: ALREADY TOLD YOU. EB: dammit!

(psst. john. your sisters god dog is gonna give him some nasty powerups.)

and back we go again. nevermind about being in a reasonable order i guess!

CG: I KEEP SCROLLING BACKWARDS THROUGH YOUR ADVENTURE. CG: TRYING TO PIECE TOGETHER HOW YOU BOTCH THIS UP SO BADLY. CG: AND I KEEP FINDING THESE STRIKING POCKETS OF FOOLISHNESS. CG: LIKE WHAT YOU'RE DOING NOW. CG: RIDING YOUR LITTLE RED ROCKET.

for a lot of this, his trolling order isnt even "oh i fucked up and embarrassed myself time to jump back again and start fresh!" its literally just him being a sleep-deprived dumbass jumping to random points he comes across and thinking every single time that for some reason it wont be a fucking nightmare to attempt a conversation with john!

TIMELOOP PARADOX PRANK!!!!

EB: well, we're friends by then, aren't we? EB: or sort of like, uh, reverse anti-mutual friends. CG: WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT EVEN MEAN. EB: look, you're going to have to face it at some point... EB: that you're learning the meaning of this human emotion called friendship. CG: IS FRIENDSHIP REALLY AN EMOTION? EB: yes, absolutely.

friendship isnt an emotion, fucknuts!

CG: SO GO AHEAD, ASK ME ANYTHING. EB: ok... EB: what's the point of the game. CG: ASK SOMETHING ELSE. CG: ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT. CG: IT WAS THIS WHOLE BIG CONVERSATION WE HAD. EB: augh!

"ask me anything" (asks question) "no not that" teenage boys. am i right.

EB: where are you now? CG: IN THE MEDIUM. CG: A SEPARATE SESSION FROM YOURS. EB: no no, i know that! EB: you already told me. CG: I DID? EB: yes, in your future. CG: DAMMIT.

see karkat? how does it feel?

EB: derse? CG: THE DARK PLANET. CG: PROSPIT'S THE LIGHT ONE NEAR SKAIA. EB: well jeez, how am i supposed to know any of this?? CG: YOU'D PROBABLY FIND OUT SOONER OR LATER FROM YOUR DUMB GRANDMA. CG: BUT BY FUSING WITH THE SPRITE SHE HAS TO WITHHOLD STUFF AND BE MYSTERIOUS AND ALL. CG: TO MAKE YOUR ADVENTURE SEEM MORE "MAAAAAAGICAL!!!!" CG: IT'S INFURIATING

we dont get to see a lot of the trolls' session (compared to the kids', hardly any) and only catch a few glimpses of ... crabdadsprite? karkat sure makes it sound like hes speaking from experience. what sort of secrets did he have to pry from his crabdad? i would love to see his frustration there lmao.

i will give him this, though: hes actually been pretty helpful in this conversation! he gave john a ton of new information and all.

CG: I'M OUT OF HERE. EB: ok, but wait... EB: can you give a message to GC for me? EB: tell her nice try. CG: WHAT CG: WHY WOULD I GIVE HER A MESSAGE FOR YOU CG: DO IT YOURSELF, I'M NOT A RELAY SERVICE. EB: oh, well i thought you'd be cool with it since you asked me to give her a message for you last time. EB: but whatever.

"last time" being in karkat's future, i suppose.

CG: I FIND THAT HIGHLY IMPLAUSIBLE. CG: I'M NOT FALLING FOR ANY MORE OF YOUR HUMAN PRANKS. CG: "NICE TRY" JOHN CG: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

and on to the next conversation, where important discussions on con air are taking place:

EB: no, it's about these criminals on a runaway plane, and they've got to be stopped by nick cage and john cusack together as a team. CG: OH. CG: OK, THAT ACTUALLY SOUNDS PRETTY GOOD I GUESS. EB: it is sweet, so sweet, you would probably like it. CG: I'VE HEARD OF JOHN CUSACK I THINK. CG: WASN'T HE IN SERENDIPITY? CG: THAT WAS PRETTY GREAT FOR A HUMAN FLICK.

isnt it lovely, this disease called friendship?

EB: hahaha, oh man, that sucked so bad! CG: OK I DON'T SEE HOW WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE BECOMING FRIENDS IF YOU RECOIL FROM MY OLIVE BRANCH LIKE I'M WIGGLING A GNARLED TREE MONSTER'S DICK IN YOUR DIRECTION.

... and thus the blossoming friendship collapses like a house of cards.

EB: well, i've got one of your godly players helping me now, so we can't be in such bad shape. CG: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. EB: GC gave me a map. EB: and showed me a shortcut. CG: WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING. CG: THIS ISN'T WHAT WE TALKED ABOUT DOING AT ALL. CG: HOLD ON LET ME ASK HER ABOUT THIS... EB: ok.

now what could this human egbert be up to?

CG: OK... CG: NOW SHES JUST OVER THERE GIGGLING AT ME LIKE AN IMBECILE. CG: WHAT ARE YOU TWO UP TO, WHY ARE YOU IN CAHOOTS NOW? EB: umm... CG: OW FUCK!!! CG: OK SHE JUST WALKED OVER AND PUNCHED ME. CG: AND SAID IT WAS FROM YOU. EB: uh, sorry i guess?

not totally relevant but pitch johnkatrezi is really funny. can you imagine.

EB: i don't know why you guys are doing this to yourselves. EB: all this time jackassery, it's giving me a headache.

now that is exactly what i have been saying!

CG: OK IF YOU TALK TO HER AGAIN WHEN SHE TRIES HATCHING MORE PLANS GIVE HER A MESSAGE INTO THE PAST FOR ME. EB: ok.

now karkat...didnt you JUST say you would NEVER resort to relaying a message through john? i think you might need a good nights sleep! that month of no sleep really explains just about everything he does throughout this backwards convoluted trolling quest.

CG: TELL HER TO POLISH MY HEAVING BONE BULGE AND SET A TABLE FOR FUCKING TWO ON IT. CG: ITS FOR OUR CANDLE LIGHT HATE DATE.

the idea of a candlelight hate date is so fucking funny. i think one of those candles just might get used as a weapon.

EB: oh, did you talk to jade yet? CG: JADE, WHAT WHY WOULD I WANT TO TALK TO HER? EB: ummm, that's what you said you wanted to do last time you talked to me, i dunno. CG: OH DAMMIT. CG: ARE YOU SURE?

oh shit, is the timeline extension busted? i think we already saw that conversation, is it not supposed to happen yet? if i figure out the proper chronology, ill come back and edit this or something! whatever.

EB: but next time you talk to me, you might want to tell me to calm down first so i don't just block you.

lets see how that goes...

CG: HEY JOHN. CG: CALM THE HELL DOWN. EB: aaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuggghhhhhhhh!!!!!!! EB: how did you find me????? CG: FIND YOU? CG: WHAT DO YOU MEAN. EB: i changed my chum handle to ditch you guys.

so i guess this is one of the first conversations (or THE first?) they have from johns point of view, since john changed his chumhandle when terezi was trolling him a while before the events of the story!

EB: ok, this time i'll believe you that you aren't human. EB: because the skepticism center of my brain is starting to wear kind of thin i guess. EB: but you're still a major asshole and i don't actually want to talk to you, so bye. CG: WAIT. CG: BUT I'M NOT HERE TO TROLL YOU THIS TIME. CG: WE'RE FRIENDS OK? EB: hahahahahaha! EB: oh man, look at this outburst of little human words i'm saying! EB: from my human mouth!

yknow its pretty funny how the dynamic has turned on its head. now karkat is insisting they are friends while john responds more angrily!

CG: IT'S REALLY WEIRD. CG: THIS HUMAN EMOTION YOU CALL FRIENDSHIP. EB: friendship isn't an emotion fucknuts.

karkat- lets be friends and beat this game together john- ermmmmm no!

EB: i'm still not really sold on this friendship thing yet. EB: but i've got to go now and get on with my petty little quests. EB: so talk to you in the future i guess. EB: jerkface.

shouldnt have sent him all that hatemail karkat! look where it got you now!

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: part 9 (A5A2, part 4)

GA: Your Speech Was Really GA: Emotional CG: OK I DEFINITELY DON'T NEED YOU BUSTING MY BULGE ABOUT THE SPEECH NOW. CG: I'VE TAKEN ENOUGH SHIT. I GOT A LITTLE WORKED UP OK? CG: AND IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY, WHY DON'T YOU COME SAY IT TO MY FACE.

yeah, that inspirational speech was really more of a...confession of homoerotic hatred. karkat has a lot to think about. also, theres's vriska in the corner, plotting and meddling!

GA: Well I Havent Asked What I Wanted To Ask CG: THEN ASK!!! GA: Its About TentacleTherapist CG: YEAH. THAT'S THE ROSE HUMAN. CG: SHE'S APPARENTLY PRETTY SARCASTIC. CG: IT'S IN MY NOTES. GA: You Have Notes On Them CG: YES. GA: I Guess GA: Thats Why Youre Our Leader Karkat

karkat has notes on the humans because he is a little weirdo. kanaya wants to know about rose because she is a little weirdo.

CG: NO, I'M YOUR LEADER BECAUSE OF MY INCREDIBLE TACTICAL SKILLS AND MY ABILITY TO MOBILIZE AND MOTIVATE A BUNCH OF USELESS PEOPLE TOWARD A COMMON GOAL, AND BECAUSE I'M EXTREMELY AMBITIOUS AND INTREPID. ALSO BECAUSE LEADERSHIP IS IN MY BLOOD. WE'VE BEEN OVER THIS. GA: Statements Like That Are Also Why Youre Our Leader CG: OK, I'LL ACCEPT THAT.

oh karkat. you pathetic angry yet mildly competent little man.

GA: Have You Talked To Her CG: WHO GA: The Rose Human GA: Also GA: Do We Really Have To Say Things Like The Rose Human CG: OF COURSE WE DO. CG: IT SOUNDS SUITABLY DISDAINFUL.

he is remarkably silly.

CG: I'LL EXPECT A FULL REPORT SOON. GA: A Report About What CG: LIKE CG: HOW HASSLED YOU GOT HER TO BE CG: BUT LESS STUPID SOUNDING THAN THAT. GA: Is There A Metric For That Concept CG: NO CG: WELL THERE COULD BE CG: WE CAN GAUGE YOUR RESULTS WITH THE "FLIGHTY BROADS AND THEIR SNARKY HORSESHITOMETER".

and yet he is organizing this mission as any true leader should.

CG: IT'S ME AGAIN, ASSHOLE CG: THE ONE WHO HATES YOU, REMEMBER? CG: OR SHOULD I SAY FUTURE-REMEMBER??? EB: karkat!!!!!!!!!! CG: AGAIN WITH KNOWING MY NAME CG: IT'S REALLY FUCKING UNSETTLING WHEN YOU DO THAT.

the trolls watch while the jade human is preparing to enter sburb.

vriska, as usual, fucks everything up.

always meddling and fussing and messing!

familiar, isnt it? where have you seen that before, karkat? yep. there it is. the demon who attacked your session, originating from that of the humans.

after witnessing this, karkat trolls john a second time.

EB: we are finally getting to our first couple of conversations. cool! CG: NO, NOT "COOL". CG: WHAT IS GOING ON HERE IS VERY MUCH ANTITHETICAL TO YOUR PRIMITIVE HUMAN NOTION OF "EARTH COOL". CG: YOU SEE, IN OUR FIRST CONVERSATION, WE DIDN'T EXACTLY GET OFF ON THE RIGHT FOOT.

he continues to be very angry and frustrated with the time shenanigans he will later bring upon himself.

CG: HERE I AM TALKING TO YOU MOMENTS AFTER YOU DID THE TERRIBLE THING, AND YOU STILL DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU DID!

go on. tell him what happened when vriska knocked him out.

CG: YOU MADE AN UNBEATABLE BOSS IS WHAT YOU DID.

the prototyping of bec is the event that leads to the many factors complicating the troll and human sburb sessions.

CG: YOUR VERSION OF JACK, WHO YOU WERE SOMEHOW DUMB ENOUGH TO ENTRUST WITH THE QUEEN'S RING, BECAME ESSENTIALLY INDESTRUCTIBLE. CG: HE THEN WENT ON A RAMPAGE THROUGH YOUR POINTLESS SESSION, WHICH HILARIOUSLY, WAS ALREADY A LOST CAUSE EVEN BEFORE THIS HAPPENED! CG: I AM JUST BESIDE MYSELF WITH THE SPECTACULAR BREADTH OF YOUR FAILURE.

inevitable or not, its only more unfair to blame john for this when vriska interfered anyways.

CG: AND IF THIS WASN'T BAD ENOUGH CG: YOUR "SOLUTION" LATER WOULD BE TO OPEN A RIFT IN SOME GLORIOUS GESTURE OF MEANINGLESS SUICIDE. CG: AND I HAVE NO IDEA HOW CG: BUT THE RIFT YOU OPENED ENABLED HIM TO ENTER OUR SESSION, JUST AS WE WERE ABOUT TO CLAIM OUR PRIZE.

karkat still doesnt fully understand the nature of the scratch. its not exactly what he blames it for--it didnt let jack enter their session so much as force him to be driven there.

CG: HEY, INOPPORTUNE NAPS HAPPEN IN THIS GAME. CG: EXCEPT TO ME, BEING THE STALWART MODEL OF LEADERSHIP I AM. CG: I MANAGED TO STAY AWAKE FOR SEVERAL WEEKS STRAIGHT, I DIDN'T WANT TO LET MY GUARD DOWN FOR A SECOND. CG: BUT THEN CG: AFTER IT WAS ALL OVER, AND WE RETREATED IN FAILURE CG: I FOOLISHLY DID. CG: AND THAT'S WHEN I SAW HIM.

maybe the weeks of sleep deprivation werent the most genius idea..?

CG: JACK. CG: I DIDN'T RECOGNIZE HIM WHEN HE FIRST APPEARED. CG: BUT ON PROSPIT, I SAW HIM UP CLOSE, WITHOUT ALL THAT RIDICULOUS GREEN SHIT OBSCURING HIM. CG: I COULD HARDLY BELIEVE IT WAS REALLY HIM BY THE WAY HE LOOKED, BUT I JUST KNEW. CG: HE WAS WEARING A RING I DIDN'T RECOGNIZE, CERTAINLY NOT ONE BELONGING TO OUR QUEENS. CG: WE DESTROYED THOSE.

does he still think that bec noir and the jack from his own session are the same at this point or is he just unfinished with his rant?

CG: HE WORE IT ON HIS ONE HAND, WHICH WAS COVERED IN OUR MUTANT BLOOD. CG: AND THEN CG: JUST LIKE THAT CG: HE KILLED ME

we dont know where the blood came from yet--i might read from jacks pov at some point, to track his actions throughout space and time linearly--but karkat sees it as a symbol of connection, as it was between himself and his own jack.

CG: WHEN I WOKE UP, EVERYONE HERE WAS BUZZING ABOUT THESE ALIENS CALLED HUMANS. CG: SO NATURALLY I'M LIKE WHO GIVES A SHIT, RIGHT? CG: WELL, WRONG. CG: I PRETTY QUICKLY DETERMINED THAT HE WAS FROM YOUR SESSION, NOT OURS. CG: SO HE WASN'T REALLY "MY JACK"

ok, he does know--that makes more sense.

CG: HAVE A SECOND AND PENULTIMATE FUCK YOU: CG: "FUCK" CG: "YOU" CG: MAY IT MARK THE SECOND OF MANY TO COME, AND THE MAGNIFICENT DENOUEMENT TO MANY RECEIVED. CG: TOGETHER WE JUST TUGGED AT THE BOW TO UNRAVEL A PRESENT FULL OF GO FUCK YOURSELF. CG: HAPPY WRIGGLING DAY YOU UGLY PILE OF TRASH.

thus concludes his second conversation with john!

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: part 8 (A5A2, part 3)

technically im now in terezi's pov in the walkaround, but that doesnt mean there arent more conversations to be had with karkat!

TEREZI: 4R3NT YOU 4T L34ST 4 L1TTL3 D1S4PPO1NT3D W3 N3V3R GOT TO H4NG OUT TOG3TH3R ON PROSP1T? KARKAT: I DON'T KNOW. I GUESS? KARKAT: IT'S NOT LIKE WE DIDN'T GET TO HANG OUT PLENTY OF OTHER PLACES. TEREZI: YOU DONT G3T 1T! TH3R3 W3R3 4LL TH3S3 TH1NGS 1 W4S PL4NN1NG ON SHOW1NG YOU 4ND STUFF W3 COULD H4V3 DON3 TOG3TH3R

>:'[ reminds me of jades letter to john...

KANAYA: Hey Have You Ever Heard Of The Green Sun? KARKAT: YEAH. IT'S GOT SOMETHING TO DO WITH THEIR PLAN TO KILL NOIR. KANAYA: I See KANAYA: Anything More Specific Than That KARKAT: NOPE. I'VE GOT NO IDEA WHAT IT IS, WHAT IS DOES, WHAT ITS ROLE IN THE PLAN IS, OR IF IT'S GOT ANY CHANCE OF WORKING. KARKAT: WE SHOULD PROBABLY WORRY ABOUT OUR OWN PROBLEMS.

karkat is starting to learn some very important things about the plans of these humans that he remains adamantly against trolling... starting to talk about the green sun, which he now knows is connected to the version of jack that terrorized their session.

KARKAT: JUST... PLEASE. KARKAT: GO FIND SOME REMOTE CORNER OF THIS LAB, BUILD YOURSELF A NICE WEB, AND SIT THERE PEACEFULLY AND HARMLESSLY UNTIL WE ALL DIE. OK? VRISKA: Die? Lame. VRISKA: Karkat, there is a8solutely no chance we are going to die. VRISKA: Not with my luck! I got all of it, remem8er?

oh, vriska...what might you be plotting?

and that seems to be the end of the relevant conversations in this game!

karkat gives in and decides to check out the humans. he immediately develops a massive fucking hatecrush on john.

before we get to the trolling, lets see what he has to say in this memo.

karkat has officially changed his plan from "these humans are stupid and worthless" to "oh my god please can we torment them forever" like the angry little gay freak he is.

PCG2: I CAN PLAINLY SEE YOU ARE GOING TO START WRITING THIS MEMO IN FIVE MINUTES. PCG2: ALL I HAVE TO DO IS GO MAKE MY "BOR1NG 1NSP1R4T1ON4L SP33CH" AND THEN WALK OVER TO YOUR COMPUTER AND START FUCKING WITH YOU.

PAST carcinoGeneticist 3 [PCG3] 10 MINUTES AGO responded to memo. PCG3: THANK YOU NEPETA, FOR ALERTING ME TO THE PRESENCE OF YET MORE OF THIS TAWDRY ROLEPLAY-INFESTED CLOAK AND DAGGER RUBBISH. PCG3: HOW VERY INTERESTING.

we already have three separate past karkats. im not sure which is the current present one but theyre just 10 minutes apart so i dont think i matters. as far as im concered, they all are.

PAST carcinoGeneticist 4 [PCG4] 4 MINUTES AGO responded to memo. PCG4: YOU BASTARD, IS IT REALLY SO MUCH TO ASK TO TAKE A FEW TOOLS OUT BEHIND THE GRUBSHED. PCG4: ALL I'M ASKING YOU TO DO IS HASSLE SOME ALIENS, GOD. PCG4: AFTER ALL THOSE TIMES I SAVED YOUR LIFE YOU THINK YOU COULD DO ME ONE LITTLE SOLID. CTA: yeah after you got me kiilled iin the fiir2t place. PCG4: HOW CAN YOU THROW THAT IN MY FACE AGAIN, I THOUGHT WE WERE COOL. CTA: ii 2aiid whatever.

another karkat joins the fray.

CURRENT apocalypseArisen [CAA] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CAA: i will n0t be participating CAA ceased responding to memo. PAST carcinoGeneticist [PCG5] 3 MINUTES AGO responded to memo. PCG5: OH MY GOD, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO NOW. PCG5: THAT'S IT GUYS, THE PLAN IS CANCELED. PCG5: ARADIA ISN'T GOING TO MOPE AT THESE LOSERS FOR US, THE WHOLE PLAN HINGED ON THAT.

is there even a point in cataloguing these? i mean, at least theyre fairly linear. except for PCG3, the "minutes ago" indicators are decreasing.

PAST carcinoGeneticist 6 [PCG6] 2 MINUTES AGO responded to memo. PCG6: NO, FUCK. PCG6: YOU CAN'T BE NICE TO THEM. PCG6: YOU ARE COMPLETELY MISSING THE GLUBBING POINT, FISH PRINCESS. CGC banned PCG6 from responding to memo. PAST carcinoGeneticist 7 [PCG7] 2 MINUTES AGO responded to memo. PCG7: HEY TEREZI I'M ABOUT TO MAKE THIS AWESOME SPEECH AND INSPIRE THE FUCK OUT OF YOU GUYS. PCG7: WHEN I'M DONE I'M COMING OVER TO YOUR STATION AND THEN YOUR ASS IS MINE.

cmon, karkat. drop the speech you keep hyping up! im w88888888ing........

CURRENT carcinoGeneticist [CCG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CCG: OH NOW WHAT'S UP??????????? CGC: GOD D4MM1T H3 LOGG3D ON TO MY COMPURO3IHHGRNVNFSDKS'SD CGC: 4ND H3S ST1LL M4SH1NG M3!!! >:[

karkat and terezi proceed to do some extremely stupid but entertaining bullshit.

CCG: HEY VRISKA, YOU'RE DOWN WITH MY TROLLING PLAN. CCG: WHY DON'T YOU TELL EVERYONE IN RAINBOW ASSGRAB JUNCTION WHAT A GREAT IDEA IT IS. CAG: I'm 8usy. CCG: WHAT THE FUCK COULD YOU BE BUSY WITH??? CAG: I'm making my own plans! I'm a pretty 8ig deal, remem8er Karkat? CGC: 1T LOOKS L1K3 YOU FORGOT HOW M4NY 1RONS SH3 H4S 1N TH3 F1R3 CAG: Exactly!

vriska continues to plot.

FUTURE carcinoGeneticist [FCG] 6:12 HOURS FROM NOW responded to memo. FCG: I'M GOING TO BE FUCKING SICK. CGC banned FCG from responding to memo.

and at last, the shitshow asshole factory is complete.

now karkat,

troll this worthless human >:]

CG: YOU'RE WELCOME FOR THAT. CG: YOU UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT. EB: hi karkat! CG: WHAT CG: HOW DO YOU KNOW MY NAME. EB: oh man. EB: this is it, isn't it? EB: i've been looking forward to this! CG: WHAT IS IT. CG: ME HATING YOU IS WHAT'S IT. CG: IF THAT'S WHAT YOU MEAN, YEAH, BINGO. EB: no, i mean this is the first conversation between us, from your perspective.

following his embarassingly passonate confession of hatred, karkat is shocked to discover that john believes them to be "buddies."

CG: WHY WOULD I TROLL YOU BACKWARDS? THAT DOESN'T MAKE ANY FUCKING SENSE. CG: AND WHY WOULD I HELP YOU AND YOUR IDIOT FRIENDS? CG: I WOULD JUST BE HELPING YOU BLUNDER DOWN THE PATH THAT ENDS WITH YOU OPENING THE RIFT LIKE A BUNCH OF MORONS.

why would you, karkat? why would you, indeed?

CG: LET'S JUST AGREE TO NEVER BRING IT UP AGAIN. CG: THE STUFF I WAS BABBLING ABOUT EARLIER. EB: yeah, well we never really talked about it in the past, so i guess we do agree to that. CG: BUT IF I TALK TO YOU AGAIN CG: IN YOUR FUTURE, LIMITED THOUGH IT IS CG: YOU'LL REMEMBER MY EMBARRASSING SHIT CG: SO I GUESS CG: I'LL HAVE TO TROLL YOU BACKWARDS?

see, karkat? see?

CG: FUCK YOU AND FUCK THE JOKE BOOK YOU RODE IN ON. CG: FUCK. CG: FUCKING. CG: YOU. EB: :D EB: see you soon! CG: WAIT CG: WHAT

ah, i look forward to seeing this unfold. until next time, i suppose.

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: part 7 (A5A2, part 2)

karkat has just fallen asleep. surely there will be no conflicts with the destruction of prospit.

he wakes up on prospit just in time to see it destroyed by a guy who sure looks like his old friend...and his dreamself is killed, throwing him into visions of horrorterrors like those that jade saw when her dreamself died in descend.

CGA: What CGA: What Did I Do FUTURE carcinoGeneticist [FCG2] 600 HOURS FROM NOW responded to memo. FCG2: OK. FCG2: EVERYTHING'S FINE I GUESS. CGA: What Happened FCG2: I PASSED OUT FOR ABOUT AN HOUR. FCG2: FUCKING EMBARRASSING. FCG2: YOU ARE OUT OF YOUR GODDAMN MIND, YOU KNOW. CGA: Shithive Maggots You Mean FCG2: YEAH FCG2: IN A GOOD WAY THOUGH.

back on page 2567, another karkat joins the memo, having woken up.

and now we reach the walkaround. im turning ruffle back on so i can play!

...and it REALLY doesnt want to load past 12%. i feel like i remember it doing this last time i tried playing it. ok i give up, im gonna use the lets read homestuck dubs.

the opening of this game has karkat send messages on the memo that we have already seen--the lines i included earlier in this post! the only difference is that now the karkat listed in the log is PCG, since we are seeing him write this from his pov.

another hussie note, via the homestuck companion extension:

and im gonna reference dialogue from here so i dont have to rip it from the video by hand.

in > Talk To Terezi, karkat (indirectly) tells terezi about his horrorterror dream and then orders all prospit dreamers to stay awake.

in > Get lowdown from Terezi, terezi tells karkat that they discovered the humans.

im gonna be skipping conversations without a lot of interesting content in them, but i might revist them in future pov liveblogs!

oh nice, lets talk to kanaya

KARKAT: HEY I JUST GOT DONE TALKING TO YOU IN THE PAST. REMEMBER YOU WERE FUCKING AROUND WITH THE VOLCANO AND I PASSED OUT FOR AN HOUR? KANAYA: Vaguely KARKAT: THAT WAS NOW. HEY GUESS WHAT, NEW ORDERS. NO MORE IMPROMPTU AMPUTATIONS, OK? KANAYA: Impromptutations

impromptutations was funny ok. also this is a moment when i think the chronological pov makes things interesting.

KANAYA: I Did My Best To Clean Up The Blood Before You Woke Up KARKAT: THANKS FOR THAT. ALSO ANOTHER NEW ORDER. DON'T GO TO SLEEP. KANAYA: Dont Worry I Dont Really Want To Find Out What Happens If I Do

way to go girl. cleaning up the blood AND on top of this no-sleep plan? hell yeah!

KANAYA: Any Other Orders KANAYA: Such As Those Which Might Pertain To These Alien Children KARKAT: YEAH, MY ORDERS ARE THAT THEY'RE COMPLETELY IRRELEVANT, AND WHO CARES ABOUT THEM. KANAYA: How Are Those Orders KARKAT: BECAUSE I'M YOUR LEADER THAT'S HOW. KANAYA: They Are Not Irrelevant KARKAT: HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT. KANAYA: Its A Bit Complicated KANAYA: But I Believe You Should Give Them A Closer Look Before You Decide What To Do About Them If Anything KANAYA: Perhaps Then An Especially Leaderly Speech Will Be In Order KARKAT: OK I DOUBT THAT BUT WHATEVER.

we continue to discuss the humans they discovered.

oh boy its vriska time!

KARKAT: HEY VRISKA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING. KARKAT: PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, LET IT BE SOMETHING INCONSEQUENTIAL AND BENIGN. VRISKA: Karkat! Man, you were out for a long time. I have made so many plans for these humans while you were asleep. Do you know how many plans have 8een made?

we are really building up the plans to mess with these humans!

KARKAT: LOOK WHATEVER YOU'RE DOING, STOP. OR PUT IT ON PAUSE. CAN YOU PLEASE DO THAT? KARKAT: I WASN'T GOING TO BOTHER WITH THE HUMANS BUT NOW YOU'RE MAKING ME NERVOUS. JUST GIVE ME THE CHANCE TO LOOK INTO THIS MATTER, AND THEN I'LL BRIEF EVERYBODY. KARKAT: MAYBE WITH A SPEECH OR SOMETHING. CAN YOU DO THAT?

and karkat continues to hint at a leaderly speech.

he also discusses the "impromptutations" with equius (supplier of the robolegs) and tavros (sleeping, unwitting participant/victim/recipent)

he talks more about the humans with nepeta. wow all these other trolls really do fucking wanna talk to these humans which karkat could not give a crap about!

the face of a girl whose roleplay shenanigans have been enabled.

and now onto feferi:

FEFERI: Finally! So Karkat, w)(at was your dream like after you died? I )(ave been glubbing like crazy over )(ere wondering about it. KARKAT: I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT IT. JUST DON'T GO TO SLEEP. KARKAT: OH WAIT, YOU'RE A DERSE DREAMER, RIGHT? NEVER MIND, KNOCK YOURSELF OUT. LITERALLY.

karkat's orders only apply to prospit dreamers. if he actually mistook her for a prospit dreamer briefly, i wouldnt be surprised. i dont have a great handle on how moon assignments work and she has some prospit traits.

FEFERI: You look so nervous and pale. Were you scared of w)(at you saw? KARKAT: WHAT ABOUT NOT TALKING ABOUT IT DON'T YOU GET. FEFERI: T)(ere's no reason to be scared! T)(ey are not as terrible as t)(ey look. FEFERI: W)(en Derse is destroyed, I am going to go to sleep and prove it.

her actual plan for when shes asleep is to get the horrorterrors to create the dream bubbles so dreams wont be so scary!

aradia is up next.

ARADIA: have y0u decided t0 tr0ll them yet KARKAT: TROLL WHO? ARADIA: never mind ARADIA: lets pretend i didnt say that and lets als0 pretend it isnt inevitable

oh aradiabot. i love u so much but u rlly can be infuriating for people to talk to.

ARADIA: n0thing. its n0t like a decisi0n y0u are ab0ut t0 make will invariably lead t0 every pr0blem we have and will ever face as well as the great und0ing itself

if she didnt make me so sad i would find her really funny

ARADIA: actually i guess i c0uld kill y0u right n0w and st0p it all fr0m happening thus d00ming us all in an 0ffsh00t timeline ARADIA: i might c0nsider it if we all werent d00med anyway ARADIA: and if y0u werent my friend

even though as a robot, aradia is much more violent than godtier or pre-death aradia (remember how she beats vriska to death?), shes so...idk her nihilism loops all the way back around to being almost sweet :]

KARKAT: IF WE WEREN'T ALL ABOUT TO DIE, I'D DEDICATE OUR WHOLE TEAM TO FINDING A WAY TO BRING YOU BACK TO LIFE

i love it when its obvious that karkat cares so much about his friends despite his attitude.

SOLLUX: [...] iim not goiing two break down 2obbiing becau2e you pa22 out at the 2iight of a liittle blood, why dont you man up. KARKAT: HEY FUCK YOU, I TURN AROUND AND SEE A CRAZY GIRL WITH A CHAINSAW AND A TSUNAMI OF BROWN. IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK THAT WE NOT TURN OUR LITTLE HIDEOUT INTO A SLAUGHTERHOUSE?

foreshadowing much?

KARKAT: SO WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH THESE ALIENS, IS IT ANYTHING I SHOULD GIVE A SHIT ABOUT? SOLLUX: no not at all, theyre u2ele22 and uniintere2tiing liike iim 2ure you already gathered. SOLLUX: ii recommend we dont bother wiith them, though aradiia 2eem2 two thiink well all be iin each other2 2ponge2 iineviitably. SOLLUX: whatever, iim pretty commiitted two not haviing anythiing two do wiith them ever. KARKAT: GOOD, THAT'S WHAT I LIKE TO HEAR.

finally, karkat thinks. someone who agrees.

KARKAT: MAN, FUCK MY FUTURE MEMOS. SOLLUX: no way, theyre hiilariiou2, be2t thiing about haviing you a2 a leader hand2 down. KARKAT: FUCK THAT SENTIMENT, AND FUCK YOU, AND FUCK FUTURE ME.

youre getting calinguously freudian there, karkat...

oh cool, time for some ectobiology reminiscence.

maybe ill go back and add the ectobiology to an earlier post?

anyways, we are now back to normal conversations.

...which i will get to in another post because this one is already very long.

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: part 6 (A5A2, part 1)

having recently had victory torn from his fingertips, karkat reacts to the loss of the prize. through a memo, of course.

FCG: HEY PAST ME, GO HAVE A BLAST KILLING THE KING, I'M SURE IT WILL BE AWESOME. FCG: IN FACT, IT WAS AWESOME. BANG UP JOB WITH THAT, DUDE! FCG: TOO BAD IT WAS ALL A HUGE WASTE OF TIME. FCG: OH, WHAT'S THAT, PASTHOLE? YOU DIDN'T READ THIS AND FIGURE THAT OUT AHEAD OF TIME?

he is very understandably upset but damn.

FCG: I'VE GOT TO PULL IT TOGETHER. FCG: THINK BACK TO WHAT WE MIGHT HAVE DONE WRONG. FCG: BUT THE THING IS FCG: AS MUCH AS OUR PAST SELVES ARE A BUNCH OF STUBBORN UNLISTENING ASSHOLES FCG: I CAN'T EVEN REALLY IDENTIFY ANY MISTAKES WE MADE. FCG: IT WAS ALL PRETTY MUCH LIKE CLOCKWORK. FCG: A 600 HOUR CAMPAIGN TO COMPLETE A GAME LIKE THIS IS PRETTY GOOD IF YOU ASK ME. FCG: AND I HAVE ASKED ME. FCG: IT TURNS OUT ME AGREES. FCG: I CAN'T SHAKE THE FEELING SOMEONE ELSE MUST BE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS. FCG: IT DOESN'T SEEM LIKE IT WAS SOMETHING THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN IN OUR SESSION.

he says sollux is attempting to trace the source of the attack.

FCG: HE SAYS HE'S WORKING ON TRACING THE ORIGIN OF THIS DISASTER. FCG: IF I FIND OUT WHO'S RESPONSIBLE FCG: I WILL FCG: I DON'T EVEN WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT NOW. FCG: WASTE OF GOOD FRESH RAGE. FCG: I'M A LITTLE TIRED OF ALL THE OLD THINGS I'VE BEEN ANGRY ABOUT. FCG: IT'S GOTTEN SO STALE. FCG: IN A WEIRD WAY I'M SORT OF LOOKING FORWARD TO HAVING SOMETHING NEW TO BE PISSED OFF ABOUT. FCG: IT'S NOT LIKE THERE'S ANYTHING ELSE TO LIVE FOR NOW ANYWAY.

oh karkat :(

that and this next bit are, as they say, hitting me in the feels

FCG: WHAT DID YOU GUYS DO FOR THE LAST HOLIDAY? FCG: ANYONE? FCG: I REMEMBER MY LUSUS HAD BEEN GONE FOR DAYS AND I WAS STARTING TO GET WORRIED. FCG: BUT THEN HE FINALLY RETURNED, TRIUMPHANT. FCG: HE BROUGHT THE FRESH BEHEMOTH LEAVING INTO OUR HIVE, AND TOGETHER WE DECORATED IT. FCG: AND FCG: I DUNNO FCG: THAT'S ALL I CAN SAY, I'M GETTING A LUMP IN MY SQUAWK BLISTER. FCG: I GUESS I'M DONE. FCG: I'M GOING TO LIE DOWN NOW FCG: ON THE STEEL FLOOR OF THIS FRIGID METEOR DRIFTING THROUGH THE BLACK UNCARING VOID OF OUR NULL SESSION. FCG: NULL, KIND OF LIKE THIS MEMO I GUESS.

so from this timeline pov, we now know theyre on the meteor.

FCG: HONESTLY THE LAST FEW WEEKS HAVE BEEN A BLUR TO ME, JUST NON STOP YELLING AT MYSELF, HAGGLING WITH PAST AND FUTURE KNUCKLEHEADS, KILLING MONSTERS AND SOLVING PUZZLES, CYCLING THROUGH ALL THE GATES AND PLANETS LIKE A HUNDRED TIMES, ZIGZAGGING DOWN TO THE BATTLEFIELD, OUT TO THE VEIL, OVER TO PROSPIT, BACK TO DERSE, AND ON AND ON AND ON LIKE THAT UNTIL WE THOUGHT WE WON. FCG: BUT WE DIDN'T WIN. WE LOST.

gee, maybe theyd be less of a blur if you had actually slept during that time.

CGA: I Have No Idea What Im Doing Here FCG: SURE YOU DO. FCG: OR, YOU WILL. TRUST ME YOU'LL DO FINE.

what gets me about this: karkat helped kanaya with her frog breeding (while simultaneously carrying out regisurp, i guess?). he knows she creates a frog successfully. of course she will do fine! but he doesnt yet know that the frog they created is the source of all their issues. in fact, he is surprisingly positive here considering his situation. i guess he at least is still proud of how their session went before their victory was stolen.

FCG: AND THEN WE PROVE TO THE INVISIBLE RIDDLER THAT IS FATHER TIME BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT WHAT A BUNCH OF FUCKING IDIOTS WE ALL ARE.

karkat's reference to an invisible riddler brings to mind...oh right, i shouldnt know this yet because. wait nvm ok i guess earth does exist at this point actually so its ok! heres an excerpt of page 82.

The game presently eluding you is only the latest sleight of hand in the repertoire of an unseen riddler, one to engender a sense not of mirth, but of lack. His coarse schemes are those less of a prankster than a common pickpocket. His riddle is Absence itself. It is a mystery dispersing altogether, like the moon's faint reflection, with even one pebble of inquiry dropped in its black well. It is the most diabolical riddle of all.

since this liveblog is less of a "haha im reacting chronologically" and more of a project to reflect on what we already know and what this perspective reveals, im gonna talk about this in a bit more detail.

karkat refers to "the invisible riddler that is father time" and john refers to "an unseen riddler" as a sort of...curse, almost, upon his life. this figure has some interesting implications. i would almost compare them to lord english, given the way karkat connects him to the concept of time and how the monologue from john's title page seems to bear thematic similarities to lord english's schemes and presence over the narrative.

back on topic, though!

FCG: JUST BE PATIENT, THE ANSWER WILL COME TO YOU SOMEHOW. CGA: I Guess You Would Know FCG: YEAH, REALLY THERE'S NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT. FCG: AT LEAST AS FAR AS THE DETAILS OF THE ADVENTURE GO. FCG: WE WERE ALL PRETTY AWESOME AT THIS GAME. FCG: REALLY AWESOME IN FACT. FCG: UNTIL A LITTLE WHILE AGO. FCG: WHEN IT TURNED OUT WE WEREN'T ACTUALLY ALL THAT AWESOME. FCG: TURNS OUT WE WERE PRETTY FUCKING UNAWESOME ALL ALONG.

i think its interesting how much more positive karkat is when talking to his friends than when beating himself up for his failure. his grumpy demeanor isnt as directed at others as it is at himself. like compare what karkat says to kanaya here to some of the things he said near the top of this post. he does spin back around to beating himself up more, but he is really reassuring and gentle (in karkat terms) to her

CGA: Say Hi To Me For Myself FCG: OK I PROBABLY WON'T DO THAT, BUT ALRIGHT HA HA. FCG: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING OVER THERE ANYWAY? CGA: You Mean Future Me FCG: YEAH.

surely shes being totally normal

FCG: YOU'RE MESSING AROUND WITH YOUR CHAINSAW. FCG: WHILE TAVROS IS SLEEPING ON THE FLOOR.

hmmm.

FCG: OH GOD. FCG: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK WHAT ARE YOU DOING???????

splorsh.

the eeper (as seen by terezi)...

and i will move onto a new post as i return to jade: enter

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: hivebent, part 5

this is the conclusion of hivebent! ill discuss it in more detail from aradias pov (which im thinking of doing once i finish karkat's)

aradia posits bad luck and karkat's curse as causes of the prototyping of a horrorterror, but says its inevitable that they were to have to face a black king prototyped as such

with their weaponry and fraymotifs, aradia and sollux turning his meteors against him, and vriska rolling a perfect dice combo to land a final blow, they succeed in taking him down

karkat prepares to open the door into their new universe...

but shit doesnt work out now does it?

first flash of the pov and it aint even from the right act. figures.

i have ruffle installed so i can watch this in high quality...but not being able to rewind makes screenshotting very hard so i turned it off. and then i recorded my screen anyways! behold, the relevant section of the flash. all 16 seconds of it.

aradia saves them all from getting slaughtered by a furry. thanks, girl!

....i almost jumped right into the next stuff but i will now be moving to a new post for the meteor lab shit. i need a catchier name huh but ig meteorstuck is for the 3-year trip? whatever. reading all this karkat stuff has made my internal monologue sound like his voice from lets read homestuck. it is kind of bizarre.

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: hivebent, part 4

karkat sees something very upsetting on his computer while on gamzee's planet. they dont have the viewports yet so this must be his sburb player. wow his hair kinda looks like anime badboy hair vents right now lmao

rip sollux :(

karkats dismay here is really sad when you get to it like this. like oh wow yeah. he tried so hard to make this work. he got so far. but sollux didnt QUITE make it. look he was SO CLOSE. he had his totem ready to make his entry item and everything!

damn thats harsh jack. cmon stop slapping him his bestie just died horribly. check out gamzee's cool rocket unicycle! looks like a wweird fishy guy is bothering both of them...i think we are skipping that from this pov tho.

very understandable reaction from karkat. that corpse looks pretty nasty! but hey at least sollux is ok.

CG: THIS IS AN EMPTY THREAT, BECAUSE IF YOU MADE A BOARD AT ANY POINT ON THE TIMELINE I WOULD BE ABLE TO SEE IT RIGHT HERE AND READ THE WHOLE THING ALREADY. CG: WAIT... CG: OH GOD, YOU ACTUALLY DID. GC: Y3SSSSS! GC: FUTUR3 T3R3Z1 1S LOOK1NG PR3TTY COOL R1GHT 4BOUT NOW >8]

i dont remember how much i should know about this right now (had i read this in the order it is written) but it is fun feeling like these characters trying to deal with this timeline shit.

CG: LOOK I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE FRUITY RUMPUS ASSHOLE FACTORY. CG: WHAT'S ALL THIS ABOUT GOING AFTER THE QUEEN'S RING. GC: W3LL GC: TH3 TH1NG TH4T 1S 4LL 4BOUT 1T 1S GC: W3 H4V3 TO GO 4FT3R TH3 QU33NS R1NG GC: 1T 1S 4 N3W M1SS1ON CG: BUT WE'RE STILL IN THE MIDDLE OF TRYING TO PULL OFF REGISURP WITH JACK. CG: WHY DON'T WE TAKE IT ONE MISSION AT A TIME. GC: Y34H 4BOUT TH4T GC: TH3 WHOL3 PO1NT 1S TO D3STROY TH3 R1NG SO J4CK DO3SNT G3T 1T CG: WHY WOULD WE WANT TO DO THAT, JACK'S AN ALLY. GC: 4LSO GC: TH3 M1SS1ON SORT OF 1NVOLV3S 3X1L1NG J4CK TOO GC: >:|

regisurp is still in progress, but looks like it has been...terezisurped >:]

CG: THIS IS BULLSHIT. CG: WE'RE NOT EXILING JACK, HE'S COOL. GC: K4RK4T, H3 1S NOT TH4T COOL! CG: YES HE IS, HE'S A TOTAL BADASS WITH A FUCK TON OF BLADES AND SHIT, AND HE'S HELPING US OUT.

we did see jack speaking to karkat as his exile a few pages ago, so we know he needs to get exiled...but karkat is not on board with this plan!

CG: THE BOTTOM LINE IS I AM NOT GOING TO EXILE JACK BECAUSE YOU BELIEVE YOU CAN SMELL MALICE OFF AN INTERPRETIVE DANCE. GC: K4RK4T, H3S 4 J3RK! GC: H3 H4S ST4BB3D YOU ON MOR3 TH4N ON3 OCC4S1ON! CG: SOME OF THOSE STABBINGS WERE ACCIDENTAL! GC: >8| CG: OK, WELL I KNOW FOR A FACT THE THIRD TIME WAS ACCIDENTAL.

he has been stabbed by jack several times, and on purpose at least twice. and yet he still thinks they are besties. what is wrong with him.

CG: ANYWAY YOU'VE BEATEN THE SHIT OUT OF ME A FEW TIMES YOURSELF. GC: BUT 1 D1DN'T DR4W BLOOD!

getting a bit blackrom there, eh?

GC: 1 M34N 1 COULD H4V3 TO S4T1SFY MY CUR1OS1TY >:] GC: BUT 1 D1DNT 4S 4 COURT3SY TO YOU GC: S1NC3 YOU ST1LL W4NT TO K33P 1T 4 S3CR3T FROM M3 L1K3 4 P3TUL4NT L1TTL3 W1GGL3R >:P CG: HEY I PROMISED I'D TELL YOU. CG: I JUST CG: WASN'T READY OK GC: W3LL GC: 1TS OK GC: 1 KNOW WH4T COLOR YOUR BLOOD 1S 4NYW4Y >:]

as sweet as this is... very interesting, terezi...

GC: 1 F1GUR3D 1T OUT MYS3LF CG: HOW GC: 1 GOT 4 CLOS3R LOOK GC: R3M3MB3R >:] CG: NO GC: PFFF YOU 4R3 PL4Y1NG SO DUMB, YOU KNOW 3X4CTLY WH4T 1 4M T4LK1NG 4BOUT

...very interesting indeed...!

CG: I CLEANED UP MY WOUND AND CHANGED MY SHIRT BEFORE I EVEN MET YOU, I'VE BEEN EXTREMELY CAREFUL. CG: SO YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO FILL ME IN. GC: 1T W4S WH3N 1 GOT CLOS3 3NOUGH GC: TO SM3LL 1T UND3R YOUR SK1N GC: PL34S3 K4RK4T, DO NOT PR3T3ND TH4T YOU FORGOT 4BOUT OUR L1TTL3 MOM3NT CG: WHOA CG: YOU MEAN CG: DURING CG: FUCK. CG: OK SHHHHHHHHHH SHH SHH SHH...

🤨🤨🤨 now what exactly do u mean by that karkat. 🤨🤨 yall make out? 🤨🤨🤨

CG: WE CAN TALK ABOUT IT IN PERSON. GC: HOW "1N P3RSON" DO YOU M34N?

🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨

GC: YOU H4V3 NOT 3V3N S33N SK414 Y3T CG: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WAKE UP. GC: 1 DONT KNOW! GC: SOM3TH1NG D1FF3R3NT DO3S 1T FOR 3V3RYBODY CG: HOW MANY OF US ARE AWAKE NOW?

its gonna be a while before that happens, buddy. and not under great circumstances, either.

GC: HOW 4BOUT 1F GC: 1 T3LL YOU 4LL 4BOUT TH4T STUFF N3XT T1M3 W3 4R3 "1N P3RSON" >;] GC: 1N F4CT, 1 W1LL T3LL YOU WH3N YOU W4K3 UP! GC: UNT1L TH3N 1 W1LL K33P T4BS ON YOU 1N YOUR TOW3R WH1L3 YOU SL33P L1K3 4 L1TTL3 HON3Y P4J4M4'D PUP4 N3STL3D 1N H1S COCOON CG: WAIT LET ME GUESS. CG: DO I LOOK ADORABLE????????? GC: 4CTU4LLY GC: YOU LOOK K1ND OF L1K3 4 B1G P1L3 OF SM3LLY B4RF CG: WOW, WHAT THE FUCK. GC: OF COOOOUUUUURS3 YOU DO, DUMB4SS >:]

gosh, i love them. i forgot how much i love them

GC: DONT WORRY 4BOUT TH3 R1NG M1SS1ON GC: YOU C4N ST4Y BUSY W1TH R3G1SURP GC: 1 W1LL ORG4N1Z3 TH3 N3W M1SS1ON MYS3LF

and so both missions begin to be carried out simultaneously! regisurp will still be in action, while terezi plans to destroy the ring and exile jack...i suppose they dont conflict yet?

ill be back after dinner with a conclusion to hivebent >:]

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: hivebent, part 3

much of the actual exciting events of hivebent--on this side, at least--are revealed through exposition. its like if you watched a heist movie where they explain the heist while its carried out but if you just heard the explanation and didnt watch any of the actual scenes.

You and your like-blooded accomplice soon put OPERATION REGISURP into motion, a contingency plan which the archagent conveniently had on file and named himself. If it were drafted by a legitimate contingency firm, it would ostensibly have been given a better title. Your whole team executes the plan along the course of its journey, employing espionage, mind control tactics, political sabotage, vicious interrogations and cold blooded assassinations. Everyone does their part and you begin to learn the true meaning of teamwork, as well as this troll disease called friendship.

oh my god. they just straight up. learn the true meaning of friendship. phrased a bit silly but its just right there lmao.

But before a single step is taken, Jack briefs you on the intelligence uncovered by one of his agents. It is an advantage over the queen you will seize upon while she has let her guard down. With each prototyping by each player, the royalty of both sides would evolve. The queen with her RING OF ORBS TWELVEFOLD would first take on the claws and ridged carapace of your lusus. And then the wings and scales of Terezi's young dragon. And then the horns and gills and cloven hooves of Gamzee's fallen custodian. And so it would continue. Though a queen is a vain creature, she is also sworn to her duty. She would be braced for the heavy load of augmentation ahead. She could certainly withstand the eight eyes of an arachnid. The fairy wings might at worst be frivolous, and the great bull horns could even be regarded as striking additions. For that matter, the sultry lips of a mother grub might very plausibly suit her. She perhaps would wear a brave face even behind a dignified mustache, and the centauring of her lower torso could transpire without much complaint. She would dutifully indulge a lactating udder. And when all was said and done, doubling her head count would surely be insult to elevenfold injury, but nothing she hadn't essentially endured already, all in the name of her kingdom. But she would spare herself all of these additional debasements. Because before the rest came, there would be one corruption to her figure she could not abide. Her vanity wouldn't allow it.

im gonna post all this exposition in here--after all, if this is to be a resource for keeping up with the chronological events here, i might as well include this whole thing. perhaps i will return to it later if it fits nicely?

She could not stand bearing the visage of the most loathsome creature known to existence. So vile is its appearance, so contemptible its purpose, all depictions of the creature let alone members of its population are permanently banned from any jurisdiction in the reach of her agents. Those of its kind go by many names, and so does the reviled patron god they herald - THE GREAT DETESTATION, KING PONDSQUATTER, SPEAKER OF THE VAST JOKE, or most commonly, BILIOUS SLICK. His true name is of course forbidden. And wearing his face is where she drew the line.

She removed the ring and concealed it in the ROYAL VAULT while she was quite sure no one was looking. She then retired to her private chamber from which she would dispatch orders, no one the wiser of her disadvantage. Or so she thought.

the queen is seen removing her ring...

The operation in time would be a total success. The BANISHED QUASIROYAL would make the future Alternian wasteland her home. Until she was given a new purpose.

...and that seems to result in success. although at this point, we shouldnt know this. this part is genuinely a bit hard to keep chronological in the strict scheme of this blog but i think it at least makes sense.

But at the onset, you would know nothing of the queen's aversion to an amphibious likeness, or about her orbs twelvefold, or any such details. You were informed of her disadvantage, and would act accordingly. You and your red teammates would work to dethrone the queen in your session, while the blue team members would take on the entirely separate set of royal adversaries in their own session. This was to be a competition, after all. Or so you thought.

yeah, we dont know any of that yet. lets get back to terezi and karkat.

on the land of thought and flow, we can see them fighting some underlings with traits of prototypings from both teams. one has terezi's dragon's wings and aurthour's (i know im not spelling that correctly. there is no way.) mustache, one has the frog statue's head and goatdad's tail, another has gamzee's lusus's horns, crabdad's claws, and aurthour's (i checked. its accurate) udders, and the last has pounce de leon's mouths/ears and gamzee's lusus's fins. interesting.

and now a jump ahead 200 pages to karkats first memo.

interesting look at the timelines! do we ever know exactly what those gray/black segments mean?

anyways, im currently being "past" karkat here. welcome to the land of memos, karkat. you will have many of these in your future.

PCG: IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY TO ME IN RESPONSE TO A MEMO, MESSAGE ME IN PRIVATE AT THE APPROPRIATE POINT ON THE TIMELINE. PCG: FIRST ORDER OF BUSINESS IS ABOUT THE TEAMS. PCG: AS OF NOW, YOU SHOULD ALL BE AWARE THAT THERE IS REALLY ONLY ONE TEAM, AND WE ARE ALL WORKING TOGETHER.

yep, as of a few pages ago (from my pov, though the extension doesnt follow through to the end of the puzzle here being solved) they figured this out from those prototypings.

You would begin to notice a strange pattern. The blue team's prototypings would affect the mutations of your session's underlings. And your prototypings would affect theirs. Though the signs pointed to two distinct sessions - two sets of mystic ruins, two opposing teams, two separate chains of connected players - this was all misleading. The truth was it had always been the same session all along. That your teams were not competing, but cooperating toward a common goal. In the more drawn out form of this adventure's narrative, figuring this out would have been a huge deal. We would have been completely blown away by this stunning revelation. Wow. Same session all along. Really? Huh.

if i ever were to write a longform hivebent rewrite fic, i sure would make that reveal be exciting! back to karkat.

PCG: AND BY "NOW" I MEAN TIME LOCAL TO ME AS OF WRITING THIS. PCG: SO IF YOU'RE READING THIS IN THE PAST... PCG: UH OK FIRST OF ALL, HOW DO YOU EVEN KNOW ABOUT THIS FEATURE ALREADY? SECOND WHY DIDN'T YOU FUCKING TELL ME.

well, since from this page hes "past" karkat, and im reading this in the "past" even though it is currently being written...i guess i still am reading it in the past? man idk.

anyways, he has now announced to everyone the true nature of their session (and he wants to be the leader of them all, much to equius's discomfort.)

FUTURE carcinoGeneticist [FCG] 612 HOURS FROM NOW responded to memo. FCG: GROAN. FCG: THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING. FCG: WHAT WAS I EVEN THINKING. PCG: STFU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i cant WAIT to read all of his little arguments with himself in order. it will be glorious.

jack and karkat solve a puzzle in a frog temple. meanwhile, karkat begins another memo.

CCG: PEOPLE, WE NEED TO GET ORGANIZED HERE. CCG: SHIT IS GETTING SERIOUS. CCG: WE ARE ABOUT TO EMBARK ON OPERATION REGISURP, A CUNNING PLAN DEVISED BY DOUBLE ARCHAGENT JACK NOIR TO EXILE THE BLACK QUEEN. CCG: WE WILL NEED ALL HANDS ON DECK FOR THIS, EVEN THE IDIOTS.

the plot is really ramping up!

karkat is quickly distracted by attempting to resolve eridan's romantic issues. poor kid just cant resist!

FCA: i got a problem FCA: wwith feferi FCA: and im really kinda sittin here in bad shape about it emotionally speakin CCG: OK, WELL CCG: I GET THAT, I HEAR YOU BRO CCG: BUT THIS IS STILL NOT THE RIGHT PLACE FOR THIS SO I'VE GOT TO BAN YOU. CURRENT carcinoGeneticist [CCG] banned FUTURE caligulasAquarium [FCA] from responding to memo. CCG: BUT SERIOUSLY JUST GET IN TOUCH WITH ME IN PRIVATE ABOUT IT, OK MAN? CCG: WE'LL GET YOUR SHIT STRAIGHTENED OUT. CCG: OK. CCG: IS EVERYBODY GOOD?

as terrible as things end up going re: eridan and feferi, karkat is being really sweet here. maybe a bit too nice given how eridan is but...this guy really cares. talk about learning the true meaning of friendship!

FAG: We kicked the queen out of there no sweat! It was easy. In fact, I did most of the work myself, right 8efore I found all the treasure and scaled all the rungs. CCG: OH, ALL OF THEM YOU SAY? CCG: FASCINATING.

future arachnidsgrip, aka "fag" (honestly one of my fave gags in the whole comic lmfao) shows up to tell karkat things go fine. as usual, he is very mad about the interference with his beloved memos.

CCG: IF I WERE FUTURE ME, WHICH I GUESS I AM, I WOULD READ THIS AND BE ALL OVER IT, LIKE DAMMIT KARKAT WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING. CCG: GET TO THE POINT. FUTURE carcinoGeneticist [FCG] 0:20 HOURS FROM NOW responded to memo. FCG: YEAH PRETTY MUCH. CCG banned FCG from responding to memo.

shakes my head while tutting in disappointment. he is NOT beating the selfcest blackrom allegations.

chaos is ensuing. past tavros shows up to ask for help with vriska, and then past vriska chimes in on those very events.

CCG: OK, MAYBE I'LL TAKE A MINUTE TO COLLECT MY THOUGHTS AND GET BACK ON TOPIC HERE. FUTURE carcinoGeneticist [FCG] 609 HOURS FROM NOW responded to memo. FCG: NO YOU WON'T. FCG: THIS ONE WAS PARTICULARLY NAUSEATING IN RETROSPECT, I'M SHUTTING THIS DOWN. FCG banned CCG from responding to memo. FCG closed memo.

yeah, i think thats a good place to pause.

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: hivebent, part 2

and im back! in the present, apparently.

But not too far into the present. Right around this moment, with Karkat and the toilet, during a conversation we have already read...

which was in my previous post. since im doing this in a LOGICAL and REASONABLE order.

AG: Hey 8rave leader. CG: OH MY GOD, WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO ME. AG: Can I join your team? CG: YES I'M GLAD YOU ASKED, BECAUSE THERE IS A WIDE OPEN SLOT FOR THE MOST VILE BACKSTABBING SOCIOPATH WHO EVER LIVED.

hello, vriska.

CG: I'VE GOT THE BETTER SCOURGE SISTER ON MY TEAM AND IF YOU BREAK YOUR TRUCE YOU'LL HAVE TO ANSWER TO HER. CG: THE FUNNY THING IS SHE WAS ALWAYS WAY BETTER THAN YOU EVEN WITHOUT ANY POWERS. CG: YEAH THAT'S RIGHT, I KNOW YOUR WHOLE STORY.

i suppose i might as well play dumb about this. terezi and vriska have history, now do they? what might this entail?

CG: HEY LOOK AT ME BEING THE ONE TO TALK SHIT AT WARP SPEED THEN LOG OFF BEFORE YOU CAN REPLY. CG: BYE, IDIOT. carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling arachnidsGrip [AG] carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling arachnidsGrip [AG] AG: Oh, 8ack so soon! Did your thum8 slip on the 8utton???????? AG: I guess you can't get enough of me. AG: ::::) CG: YOU MADE ME DO THAT. CG: AND YOU KNOW IT. AG: You 8n't got nothing on me and you can't prove shit!!!!!!!!

and then this bit that is WAY funnier than it has any right to be. hey this isnt relevant but look at this animation of this scene. onto nepeta!

carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling arsenicCatnip arsenicCatnip [AC] CG: HEY. AC: :33 < *ac perks up curiously* AC: :33 < *she wiggles her rear end a bit and then chases something she s33s bounce into one of karkats shoes* CG: KARKAT CAN'T BELIEVE HE HAS TO SINK THIS LOW. CG: KARKAT CAN'T BELIEVE HE'S ASKING AN AUTISTIC GIRL IN A CAVE TO JOIN HIS TEAM.

the drama of attempting to build the team continues. oh karkat i know youre trying to be ableist but she probably doesnt notice its supposed to be insulting. on account of the autism. that she has. and wonders why hes stating this fact. (#relatable)

CG: OK, BRIEFING: CG: ME, TEREZI, GAMZEE AND TAVROS ARE ALL PLAYING NOW. CG: THE CONNECTION ORDER IS AT -> TC -> GC -> CG.

not bad progress on planning this! i feel like the pacing is more obvious from this perspective. like we rlly gotta get all these guys into the medium asap! karkat is already in there though and i think all these team member shenanigans have been distracting him...

jack has come across this little shouty troll kid. naturally, being jack, he wants to stab him...

stab him he does.

karkat is pretty unconcerned with this injury and is just being a pretty miserable mess about the possibility of his blood being discovered.

poor kid. apparently jack thinks that this is the saddest thing hes ever heard. yeah, karkat is such a pathetic crybaby that this fuckin guy who loves stabbing people feels bad for him.

pretty interesting how much it resembles the blood symbol, huh

this alone makes karkat immediately imprint on him like a baby chicken since hes apparently a very weird kid.

THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP!

ok the actual extension puts something else after this but im skipping it for now. to maintain the best chronology im skipping to this conversation with vriska. he rants to her about quadrants, then tells her about jack.

CG: I MEAN HE'S JUST STANDING HERE NOW. CG: WAITING FOR ME I GUESS. CG: BUT IT'S OK, I THINK HE'S PRETTY MUCH SETTLED DOWN. AG: Settled down? CG: WELL, HE STABBED ME ONCE. AG: Oh, only once! AG: Are you sure you should trust him? I don't know if I would, 8ut hey I'm not the leader. CG: NO, NO, IT'S COOL. CG: HE'S COOL, IT'S FINE I DON'T REALLY MIND THE STABBING, IT WAS ALL A MISUNDERSTANDING. CG: WELL OK I'M PRETTY SURE HE MEANT TO STAB ME. CG: BUT I KIND OF THINK THAT'S LIKE CG: THE WAY HE GREETS PEOPLE?

honestly i always read vriska's "only once" there as sarcasm but then i met someone who read it as a genuine reaction and thats just as funny. whether vriska is being like oh a little stabbing is fineeeeeeee or shes being like what do you MEAN only once dude. both are funny.

AG: Doesn't Trollian have some kind of viewport feature? CG: YEAH BUT I'M PRETTY SURE ONLY SOLLUX KNOWS HOW TO SET THAT UP, AND HE'S BEEN INCOMMUNICADO FOR HOURS FOR SOME REASON.

sollux isnt answering (dead and going on dream adventures) so they dont get to set up their trollian viewports until they get to the veil. whoops im getting ahead of myself. and of the timeline.

CG: JUST GET YOUR ASS IN HERE SO WE CAN DETHRONE THIS GODDAMN QUEEN. CG: IT'LL MEAN ONE LESS GOD BOSS WE HAVE TO FIGHT. AG: Fine, I'll be right there.

and we are planning to take down the queen!

just so this doesnt get too long im gonna continue this in another post.

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: hivebent, part 1

we begin in a lab on a meteor in the furthest ring.

computer enhance.

look at all those little goobers! i am not replaying this whole flash just for this moment but in lieu of that, here's hussie's commentary on the scene from the book, just for a bit of spice.

as far as i can tell, karkat's first chronological appearance in hivebent is 2177.

vriska has just jumped tavros off a cliff, and he chooses to message karkat about it. im not sure what he hoped to get out of this since karkats only reply is characteristically snappy.

we then jump to 2025. karkat is messing around with some .~ATH files. in the middle of examining the mobius double reacharound virus (titled check_thii2_2hiit_out.~ATH), he gets trolled by its author. hello sollux.

CG: SO YOU MADE THIS GAME? TA: no no. TA: more liike ii adapted iit. CG: FROM WHAT. TA: 2ome crazy technology AA dug out of 2ome ruiin2. TA: havent you talked two her about iit? CG: MAN, NO. CG: I CAN'T TALK TO HER, SHE'S SO SPOOKY.

we start talking about the game that will take up the rest of karkats story, and get a hint about this mysterious "AA."

he then hears crabdad complaining, and chooses to put this off...long enough to introduce himself, i guess.

karkat's introduction is 1992, written in a way directly referencing john's introduction.

Earth, also for convenient reference, is a planet that does not yet exist.

see how we are doing this? logical! earth doesnt exist yet, so of course we arent starting with the humans!

homestuck does not want me to read it chronologically. it is doing everything possible to stop me from reading it chronologically.

This game, for convenient reference, is a game that DOES NOT YET EXIST.

please. please let me obey chronology.

Later on, you would swap your modus with your hacker friend, a guy who unlike you happens to be competent with programming. It would only make sense.

i thought i would embark on this quest and find its purpose along my way. that purpose, it seems so far, is to acknowledge just how stupid this chronology is.

It is your sixth wriggling day, and as with all five preceding it blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

yeah i was about to say something like that. that being that i wont have much to say so long as the plot remains linear.

It figures that installing this new beta chat client would open the floodgates

i always forget that trollian was brand new when hivebent starts. i wonder what they used to message each other before then?

speaking of which, his first pesterlog after his introduction is page 2010, with gamzee. its kinda sad how mean karkat is to a lot of his friends tbh.

TC: iSn'T sOmEtHiNg BiG aLl GoInG dOwN? CG: WHAT? TC: i HeArD sOmEtHiNg bIg WaS gOiNg AlL dOwN. TC: JuSt AlL bE tElLiNg Me AlL wHaT mOtHeRfUcKiN iT's Up AnD aLl AbOuT. CG: STOP SAYING ALL. ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT TA'S THING? TC: yEaH!! fUcK yEaH mAn, So MyStErIoUs. TC: I'm NeVeR bEiNg GeTtInG cEaSeD tO bE aMaZeD bY aLl ThEsE fUcKiN mYsTeRiEs LiFe'S gOt FoR uS. CG: UUUUUUGH. CG: ANYWAY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S UP WITH THAT. CG: MAYBE I'LL TALK TO HIM TONIGHT ABOUT IT. MAYBE I WON'T. CG: IT'S PROBABLY JUST ANOTHER ONE OF HIS PROJECTS THAT WINDS UP BEING COMPLETELY USELESS AND A HUGE WASTE OF MY TIME.

(apologies if the text is hard to read on dark mode. i use cyber theme myself and cant see a word gamzee says here)

according to the pov cam, the next page karkat is on chronologically is 2058. the great team divide / team leader argument of hivebent has officially begun, with karkat and terezi. and in the end, it wont even matter at all. lmao.

CG: OK WELL CG: SPEAKING OF THAT CG: I SHOULD GO DOWNSTAIRS AND DEAL WITH THIS GRUMPY CUSTOMER. CG: IT'S GOING TO FONDLE MAJOR SEEDFLAP, BUT HOPEFULLY IT'LL BE QUICK. CG: YOU CAN ESTABLISH YOUR CONNECTION AND DO YOUR TRIVIAL SIDEKICK STUFF I GUESS IN THE MEANTIME. GC: OK! >:D

and apparently karkat intends to deal with his quite grumpy crabdad at the end of this conversation.

but then his computer explodes.

interesting. sburb equipment already? i suppose he was right:

CG: TEREZI AND I HAVE ALREADY ESTABLISHED A CONNECTION AND WE ARE MAKING GREAT PROGRESS HERE. CG: WE ARE A GREAT TEAM, AND I AM A FANTASTIC LEADER.

welp. guess he didnt have to deal with him after all. although the drawing on the fridge is very cute.

terezi has continued to make progress on his hive...

and he gets his new weapon...

only to find his toilet detached from its fixings.

GC: 1M YOUR S3RV3R PL4Y3R SO PR1OR1TY H4S TO B3 ON M3 G3TT1NG 1N TH3 G4M3 GC: B3FOR3 1 G3T K1LL3D BY M3T3ORS GC: 1N WH1CH C4S3 YOUD B3 SCR3W3D 1N TH3R3 GC: TH3N TH3 N3XT GUY COM3S 1N, TH3N TH3 N3XT GC: 4ND YOU BR1NG TH3 L4ST ON3 1N CG: WHOA WAIT, WHAT? CG: METEORS? CG: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. CG: WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH METEORS. GC: OH BOY YOU N33D TO G3T W1TH TH3 PROGR4M K4RK4T

karkat, i think you are a bit behind on what this game is going to be like. yet you are already on your planet despite that!

i gotta go now but ill be back