Impractical Pyromancy @cipheramnesia - Tumblr Blog

Welcome to my blog, I’m the least funny person on Tumblr and have no original content.

#finally a good introduction post #pinned posts

herpsandbirds

Midland Smooth Softshell Turtle (Apalone mutica calvata), female, family Trionychidae, Iowa, USA

photograph by Jeff LeClere

terraswallows

I bet some of you have. Cute Puppy Trying So hard Disorder

wakingfromthewater

Still thinking about this mobile game ad I got. You will f**k increasingly large creatures.

dark-magician-girl-meets-world

natalieironside

Idea: Killford the Big Red Werewolf

yujateaandpi

Was driving with my grandmother and in broken English she says “no eyes… no nose… no face. Don’t trust.” To which I looked around wildly in search of this omen of ill portend.

Cybertruck. It was a cybertruck.

natalieironside

A computer program for transcribing and digitizing handwritten documents should be called a writetyper

thebibliosphere

I need to send a "per your last email" email because the person I'm dealing with gave me conflicting information and is now trying to make me the problem.

They even had the audacity to screenshot their own email, so I've screenshot their most recent email in the same email thread that counters that other email, and now I'm trying to find a professional way to say, "this you?"

Fun times.

cipheramnesia

Someone emailed me to ask when we asked them to send a form, and I got to lead with "per the last eight years of working with you, we have literally asked for this in every interaction, and per the last five years we have asked you, specifically, person in the email, for it."

cipheramnesia

It's a little funny that Farscape a little bit did the whole "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him" thing, except the alien monk equivalent was like a former terrorist who did not even hesitate. "I guess I've got to kill a god," she said, and only concerned herself with how to do it.

cipheramnesia

And then god just goes okay, now I know I can trust you with my sweetest most innocent baby, a gigantic living starship. All my bros better be ready to kill a god for my little girl.

cipheramnesia

pyschic priest who took a vow of nonviolence, standing over the vapor cloud that used to be god: "What have I done... I killed god."

god, standing a little back and to the left: "HELL YEAH YOU DID!"

cipheramnesia

It's a little funny that Farscape a little bit did the whole "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him" thing, except the alien monk equivalent was like a former terrorist who did not even hesitate. "I guess I've got to kill a god," she said, and only concerned herself with how to do it.

cipheramnesia

And then god just goes okay, now I know I can trust you with my sweetest most innocent baby, a gigantic living starship. All my bros better be ready to kill a god for my little girl.

It's a little funny that Farscape a little bit did the whole "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him" thing, except the alien monk equivalent was like a former terrorist who did not even hesitate. "I guess I've got to kill a god," she said, and only concerned herself with how to do it.

cipheramnesia

I have 90% finished this short story and could probably stand a second set of eyes on it, for anyone who feels like throwing some free time down the scream hole.

It's a 4800 word cyberpunk story about a woman trying to get home in the middle of a riot, while she's dying from a severe head wound. It is written from her POV, as well as the POV of an AI surveillance program (which is only able to communicate in sonnets) that falls in love with her, and a coder trying to repair the AI (which can only be accessed and repaired using poetry). The story is also periodically broken up by in universe advertisements.

Still struggling with:

Making sure continuity is somewhat accurate.

Deciding whether or not to turn the sonnets into plain paragraphs (more confusing versus more clear purpose).

Going back to censor anything violent with cheerful language, deliberately ruining the flow and rhythm of the text (having trouble killing my darlings).

cipheramnesia

I am doing a rewrite because one of the places I sent this thing asked if I was open to some revisions, and the revisions they want are astute and in line with the story.

But I think it's very fucking funny of me where I start things out in the midst of a glitching advertisement, and the last letter of my pen name is also the missing first letter of the first word of the story, so my pen name kind of glitches into the text itself. That's funny right?

kdgts---zooperz

My first Idea with 2 is- format it as a chunk, just a weirdly-worded. flowing oddly specifically (like one of those sentence triplets that look VERY close to being a haiku, and you have to count it out to make sure, because this shouldn't be the place for a haiku, but you almost woulda sworn that these 3 were) paragraph until someone in the story (likely the coder) realizes for the first time that "it is writing its reports as sonnets???? why???" then format it as clear poetry.

cipheramnesia

I left them in sonnet format because ultimately it's essential that the reader understands those are structured poetry, as part of being fully immersed in deep dehumanization. It's my sole concession to comprehensibility.

formlab

Futuro Coffee Machine, Moulinex. 1991

literallymechanical

To have my coffee you must first defeat my evil coffee cone

cipheramnesia

Can we please just have one non-evil appliance that we don’t have to face in trial combat?

literallymechanical

Why

cipheramnesia

I can't keep having these homoerotic fights.

cipheramnesia

I have 90% finished this short story and could probably stand a second set of eyes on it, for anyone who feels like throwing some free time down the scream hole.

It's a 4800 word cyberpunk story about a woman trying to get home in the middle of a riot, while she's dying from a severe head wound. It is written from her POV, as well as the POV of an AI surveillance program (which is only able to communicate in sonnets) that falls in love with her, and a coder trying to repair the AI (which can only be accessed and repaired using poetry). The story is also periodically broken up by in universe advertisements.

Still struggling with:

Making sure continuity is somewhat accurate.

Deciding whether or not to turn the sonnets into plain paragraphs (more confusing versus more clear purpose).

Going back to censor anything violent with cheerful language, deliberately ruining the flow and rhythm of the text (having trouble killing my darlings).

cipheramnesia

I am doing a rewrite because one of the places I sent this thing asked if I was open to some revisions, and the revisions they want are astute and in line with the story.

But I think it's very fucking funny of me where I start things out in the midst of a glitching advertisement, and the last letter of my pen name is also the missing first letter of the first word of the story, so my pen name kind of glitches into the text itself. That's funny right?