♒️♈️♌️ @circlingwatching - Tumblr Blog

10 or 11 little ducks have been spotted crossing the dash board

thoughts/feelings

I need to start writing my thoughts down somewhere. My journal is good, instagram stories are bad. I want somewhere semi public/semi private. For me, but available to you. For a while now I have felt the urge to write. Hopefully my not knowing, my stumbling, my misunderstanding and misconceptions are in some way useful to you. to anyone. I feel so alone, among billions.

Maybe it’s just that I want to be nineteen again. Although I know if I was sent back to being my old self, I would do all the same things over again. I have never doubted the worthiness of my actions, and maybe that's my problem.

Being alive is horrifying. Self soothing is horrifying. Occupying a body is horrifying. I can’t see an end. I can’t see a solution. Is this what life is. It’s sickening. I am desperate for a path. Any way out. Please.