youâre being called a TERF because you spread TERF rhetoric and ideals.
first itâs kill all men (especially trans men) in the end itâs l trans women are men actually and therefore oppressing women. you seem subscribed to the idea that thereâs only one way to be a man, the normative patriarchal way.
trans men have every right to exist. please go meet some trans men in real life and talk to them. youâll find them kind, caring and understanding. you donât need to spread all this hate, all this anger. the patriarchy exists and being a woman under it sucks, everyone agrees with you here. we all suffer from it. but trans men donât magically become oppressors just on the virtue of being men alone.
i donât know you personally and i donât know what youâve been through. many of us had terrible experiences with men, i donât want to deny or erase your voice. but please, i beg you to find and talk to some trans men in real life.
if we canât stand united in solidarity as trans community, the TERFs and fascists are more and more likely to win.
Okay, so you just don't understand the words you're using!
Also, very funny that you accuse me of being??? A terf??? Who thinks that trans women aren't women??? When I am a trans woman??? And I am arguing for women's rights???
I know several trans men in real life who are kind and caring, and I love them very much. I also know several trans men who are shitheads.
"Kill all men" as a rhetorical talking point is not genuine call to harm, which you would know if you knew anything about what you were talking about. It's a hyperbolic expression of frustration from a marginalized individual, projected at the oppressor. Surely you wouldn't go on a black trans woman's asks and start telling them "White people have every right to exist! Racists won't fuck you for saying 'kill all whites!' After all, first people like you say 'kill all whites' and then you start thinking that race defines value, and then you start thinking that black folks are inferior!"
Because that is structurally identical to you saying that me supporting women's right to be angry about the patriarchy somehow... Means that I hate trans women?
You know... it's really starting to sound like you don't see trans women as real women, or trans men as real men. After all, you seem to imply that trans men shouldn't be considered men for... At least some purposes, including analysis of patriarchal privilege. Where does that end? At what point should we consider them men or not men? I'm very curious about where you've decided that line should be, and why you think it's somehow not transphobic to have a line like that at all.
Yes, trans men are members of the oppressor class of men, because they are men. That's what being a man is. You seem to think that this is some kind of moral indictment. That being considered a member of the oppressor class is some form of moral damnation. It is not. It is instead a call to *use* his voice and the privilege provided as a member of the dominant class to *uplift* members of the oppressed class. And vice versa: Using his voice and privilege to uplift members of the oppressed class does not mean he's *not* a member of the oppressor class. It just means that he's a good person who recognizes his privilege and is doing his best to use it to help people who don't have it. Privilege is not a scarlet letter, it's a form of social capital that must be used to advocate for those who do not possess that privilege.
Just because there are many different ways to express masculinity doesn't mean that trans men aren't benefactors of patriarchy. When men are men, even if they are progressive individuals or compassionate individuals, they inherently receive a baseline of patriarchal deference. He gets listened to more easily. His anger is seen as authority, rather than hysteria. A man's individual behavior does not preclude him from receiving the class benefits that society automatically grants to men.
"The patriarchy exists and being a woman under it sucks, everyone agrees with you here." I can most certainly promise that "everyone here" does not agree with that statement. There are large swaths of trans men on this platform who don't believe that being a woman under the patriarchy sucks, and in fact, believe that women are their true oppressors. Because that's textbook misogyny. And wouldn't you know it, men can be misogynistic regardless of whether they are trans or not.
And you tell me that we need to stand united? Talk of unity does not get to come with stipulations where a marginalized individual isn't allowed to talk about their marginalization. It certainly doesn't get to come with this patronizing bullshit where you say "I don't know your experiences, but I am going to assume them anyway, and tell you that you just need a good man in your life to show you that men aren't oppressors."
Imagine saying that to a black activist. "I don't know your experiences, but I think you just need to go and meet some white people and see that they aren't actually all that bad! You just need a good white person in your life, and you'll chill out and stop being so mean :( "
Talk of unity doesn't get to be leveraged from a person with privilege toward a person without privilege in order to tell them that their expressions of frustration are the thing causing the rift in solidarity. "If you're too mean to men, we'll stop supporting you >:(" Who does that say anything about? Because conditioning solidarity and support on someone's respectability surely doesn't say anything about me. If someone's willingness to fight for trans women's survival disappears the second a trans woman says something that bruises a man's ego, then their solidarity was never real to begin with. (And isn't it interesting how women, especially trans women, are consistently treated as though they lack the respectability necessary for anyone with privilege over them to engage in this kind of unity? It's almost like there is a history of trans women being expected to be endlessly patient, maternal, and perfectly behaved and calmly spoken in order to earn the protection of the oppressors! I wonder if there is a word for a system that such a stereotype/perception might uphold and support... Patr... Pa... Patriar... Hmmm)
I love standing in solidarity with trans men. But not if those trans men are telling me that them standing there, fighting for my rights, requires that I pretend we're not affected by the patriarchy, or that I kowtow to them. And certainly not if they're talking down to me about how me being frustrated with the patriarchy, and treating trans men as men, somehow means that I'm actually a transphobic terf who is going to start attacking trans women.
I recommend reading on intersectionality, because trust me: Terfs do not agree with materialist intersectionality that analyzes the privilege of trans men and the oppression of trans women. If you think that they do, and that talking about intersectionality is "terf" rhetoric, then... Well... You just don't understand the words you're using.
