if i smile with my teeth

21 years old english lit major president of ΖΘΨ

[omgallthegirls]

[claravlee]

gexrginas:

          “tell me about it,” she hummed in agreement, taking yet another glance around before turning her attention back to her friend. they really could do so much more for the place. they weren’t using the building to it’s full potential or maximizing what was available to them. this could be one of the best spots on campus ( it already was but it could be even better ) if gina could just get her hands on the interior design and concept. “i was thinking fairy lights everywhere and open concept light fixtures hanging over the tables, very rustic looking.”

“Fairy lights always make a place a thousand times better like, instantly,” Clara agreed, taking a moment to take the lid off her take-away cup so she could blow on her tea. She’d given up coffee for a couple of days, sensing it was bad for her nerves, and it wasn’t like she needed any help staying awake at night with how stressed the amount of works she had waiting for her to get on them. “Do you think there’s anyone actually like, in charge of the interior design of these places? Maybe they’ll let you help out, make it a class project or something.”

[claravlee]

kasbaker:

“Well…I don’t see you as an old lady. I could, well I could do a regular drawing of you sometime. To make up for all the wrinkles in this one. If you’d want.” She proposed shyly. She was just relieved that Clara had taken it so well. Because Kas had only joined a sorority to please her mother, not of her own volition, she still sometimes believed stereotypes…that all Greek life girls were catty and snobby deep down, like the girls who relentlessly messed with her in high school. And truthfully, she was relieved to see those preconceptions being proved wrong as she got to know her future sisters. “I think about it a lot…I’m a philosophy major. I guess aging and time passing goes hand in hand with pondering what our purposes are…what life means. But don’t worry, I won’t be, like, blasting Landslide at our mixers and forcing everyone to consider their inevitable mortality or anything,” she joked lightly. “Living…permanently. Yeah. Guess I hadn’t…hadn’t thought about that. That far ahead, I mean.”

Clata couldn’t help but laugh at her Landslide reference, finding it way too relatable. “Don’t worry about it, the girls are used to stuff like that since they have me as their president and all that,” she said, chuckling softly as she folded the drawing carefully. She could definitely see herself looking forward to having someone like Kas around the house, though she loved all her members the girl sure felt like a nice breath of fresh air. “It’s not that scary, you know, I -- I never thought I’d join a sorority, it sounded a lot like having constant sleepovers where people would try to paint my nails and make me watch movies about cheerleaders, but it’s not like that at all,” she started saying, giving her a small smile. “It’s a pretty quiet house, and everyone keeps to themselves for the most part so really no one’s gonna be judging you for anything -- and it’s nice not being alone, you know? There’s an instant sense of loyalty that’s a good shield to get through college, or at least it felt ilke that to me.”

[claravlee]

kasbaker:

“You want this?” she questioned as a confused expression overcame her face. “Uh, yeah, sure.” Kas replied slowly, releasing the paper from her grasp and slowly smoothing it out. “I mean, I’m not a real artist. I just doodle sometimes…it’s a hobby. I can’t remember if I ever mentioned that at any sorority event. Probably not. But, uh, I can do normal stuff too, you know. If you ever need anything done like decorations or gifts or…I don’t know.” she trailed off, trying to play it cool. Kas knew she wasn’t speaking to Queen Elizabeth herself or anything like that. But she did feel a sense of…starstruck. Like she was talking to someone important, someone influential. At least on the scale of Lockwood’s campus. She held out the drawing for Clara to take. “…How come you want this anyway?" 

It was cute, seeing how she seemed to think Clara had any sort of authority, as if being president meant more to her than getting to organize the chores schedule and make sure everything was in order. She could relate, and there was something about the girl that reminded Clara of herself -- of some version of herself at least, one she’d buried very deep. “I haven’t had a lot of people draw me, it’s kind of -- uh, surreal, in a way? To see how someone else sees you? Even if I know this isn’t how you see me now, but, you get me,” she said, reaching out to grab the drawing and looking at it again. “It’s pretty, I guess I’ve never thought about aging and like, changing this much.” Falling silent for a moment as she stared down at the lines on her face on the picture, she looked back up, hurrying a smile on her face just in case she’d made Kas feel like she was upset in any form. “It’s kind of fascinating, and you have a good eye for this kinda thing, I can tell. I’m sure it’ll be nice having an artist permanently in the house.”

[claravlee]

kasbaker:

At that very moment, Kas wished the ground would open up and swallow her whole. The president of Zeta. Of course. Kas knew if there was one thing to never do, it was piss off the president of the sorority that she was pledging. “Clara,” she let out a short gasp. “No it’s not you…” she bent down, her hair falling in front of her face as she snatched up her notebook. “I mean, it is but…not really. I just…” she sighed, opting for honesty. “I like to draw. Draw people as they get older. I don’t mean any offense I’m sorry. You definitely don’t look like that.” Kas flipped open the book and ripped the page in question out, crumbling it in the palm of her delicate hand like garbage. “I’ll throw it away.”

Listening to the girl carefully, Clara reminded herself to breathe, letting the whole situation sink in. It wasn’t like anything bad had happened -- and as she thought about it, something about her choosing to draw her made her feel good, in a way? She wasn’t too sure, but now that she’d calmed down, she was mostly intrigued. “Oh, I’m not offended, don’t worry,” she hurried to say, noticing her distress as she finally placed her face, realizing it was one of their pledges. “It was just a little shocking? But it’s fine, it was -- it was a very good picture, I hope I get to look like that when I get older,” she said, putting on a smile to ease her nerves. “I, uh. Would you mind if I kept it? It’s okay if you don’t want me to, I know artists and their art have special relationships, but I’d like to have it.”

[claravlee]

gexrginas:

          gina was pulled from her thoughts missing the entire first part of what the other female had said, but doing her best to fill in the blanks herself. she wasn’t about to admit to having not heard and ask for clara to repeat herself. that would be embarrassing ( only if you were georgina knox anyway ). so, the petite girl motioned for her friend to sit and taking a long sip of her coffee to think about what she would say first. daydreaming, clara had mentioned day dreaming. which, of course she wasn’t wrong, that’s what gina had been doing. “honestly, only fun for me. i was just remodelling this place.”

Taking her lack of an answer as a positive answer, Clara sat down across from her, dropping her bag on the floor, relieved to be rid of the weight of her books. She liked Gina, it was easy being around her. “Oh, this place could definitely use that,” Clara nodded, bringing her tea to her lips and pulling it away, sensing it was still too hot. “It could use better lighting, you can barely see a thing unless it’s noon.”

[claravlee]

kasbaker:

Kas was sitting in the quad, her graphite stained fingers clutching a pencil like a knight holding their sword. It was a surprisingly warm day, although warm was a relative term…New York warm…45 degrees and sunny. Still, it was nice enough for Kas to leave her cave and sit in the grass, eyes trained on someone across the way. She had been watching them intently, observing their features and scribbling wildly. However, her interpretation wasn’t exactly flattering, as she was aging them, so to speak. It was a hobby of Kas’s; she’d draw what she imagined a person would look like in twenty, thirty, even fifty years in the future. Every wrinkle and fine line; the way their eyes would crinkle and their hair would thin and grey as they inched closer to the inevitable. She was so immersed in her art that she hadn’t realized her stomach basically screaming at her, since she hadn’t eaten breakfast or lunch. She decided to get up and head to the cafeteria, hurrying as she clutched her sketchbook to her chest. But as she walked, she collided shoulders with someone, rattling her and causing her to drop her belongings. She glanced down, her book falling open to her most recent sketch, and back up at who she had collided with: the subject of said sketch. “I…I’m so sorry I– I wasn’t watching where I was going.” she stuttered, quickly bending down and hoping they didn’t recognize themselves in her art.

After spending a whole hour or so sitting outside, trying to finish reading the assigned book for her Russian literature class, Clara was starting to get sleepy. It was too early to go home, and she really needed to finish at least one more chapter before calling it a day, so she stood up, arms stretching over her head as her bones complained. She was leaning down to grab her stuff when someone stumbled onto her, and suddenly she was face to face with what seemed to be a very well drawn though rather terrifying picture of -- herself? But older? I sent shivers down her spine, and for a moment she stared at the girl, blinking slowly as she tried to snap herself out of the weirdness that she’d submerged into when faced with that. “I -- that, were you drawing me?” she asked, narrowing her eyes at her as she tried to reconnect with the earth and her surroundings. “Is that me? I don’t look like that, do I look like that?” 

[claravlee]

gexrginas:

          georgina sat up straight as she sipped her coffee, eyes roaming the quaint cafe. she’d been in lectures since the early hours of the morning and the caffeine break had been much needed ( even if she’d finished school for the day ). the only complaint she currently had was that the music was a touch too soft in the background, she wasn’t able to enjoy what she was sure was an acoustic rendition of a rap song. actually, the place – in her opinion – would do fantastically with a live musician, she could picture perfectly a little stage set up in the corner with a microphone and a stool. gina was so focused in fact on a remodel and ways that she could improve the already very aesthetically pleasing place, that she hadn’t noticed a familiar face.

Laughing softly as Gina’s eyes finally spotted her, Clara waved a little awkwardly at her friend with her free hand. Mondays were her busiest day, and she’d had back to back classes all morning, including one in which she’d had to give an oral presentation, and she was already exhausted even though it was fairly early. “Mind if I sit? You looked fairly busy, daydreaming about something fun?” she asked with a small smile.

[claravlee]

ninamorrissey:

Rumours, right. Knowing most of the gossip was facts, but choosing to not go into that any further with Clara. Nodding her head, “well thanks Clara…” Nina took a seat in the area that Clara had pointed out before, the no splash zone. “So have you been here all night or off with someone in this fancy hotel?”

Taking the chance to get a good look at her now that she was so close, Clara figured life wouldn’t just put a gorgeous girl in her way twice in a week for no reason. “I’ve been meaning to explore the rooms of this hotel, I’ve never been anywhere this fancy,” she said, glancing back at the hotel. “But see, no one’s caught my eye lately -- I kind of accidentally run into this beautiful girl the other night, and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her, it’s really ruined everyone else for me,” she smirked, leaning in a bit closer, praying to every star she wasn’t barking up the wrong tree, so to speak.

[claravlee]

luckythepunk:

As he watched smoke plume from his mouth and rise into the darkness he could feel his body tense up at the question. It was entirely harmless, but it had always been a struggle discussing anything even approaching personal. After he’d found her in the snow and they’d had that talk though, this felt almost trivial.  “Two sisters, one brother. All younger, all in New York. Don’t see them as much as I probably should but we’re… close, I guess. I don’t know, family’s… weird.”  He resisted the urge to sabotage this bizzare thing that they had going by shutting the discussion down, opting instead to take another drag and shrug his shoulders. “Since we’re apparently sharing, are yours still in Cali? Shit, do you even have siblings? I don’t think I’ve ever bothered to ask.”

Quickening her pace as they got closer to Theta Psi, Clara fished for her keys in her back pocket, taking a second before answering his question. It was obvious they were actually trying, for once, and she didn’t wanna ruin it -- not tonight, with how bad it had been overall. “Yeah, I have four older siblings,” she said with a smile, leading him to her room though he could probably make his way there in absolute darkness by now. “They’re all in California, so I don’t really see them a lot, but it could be worse,” she shrugged, opening her door and stepping aside to let him in. At least that side of her family was alive, and they did want to see her as much as possible, so she couldn’t really find it in her to complain. “We can have another smoke, or we can see if fucking feels different now that we have some tragic backstory and have unlocked a new levell, what’s it gonna be?”

[claravlee]

luckythepunk:

The harsh lighting and stuffy warmth of the hotel gave way to biting cold and the mellow glow of street lights as they made their way away from the party in strangely comfortable silence. Despite her telling him otherwise, he struggled not to chuckle at the irony of her words. “I did not have you down as a California girl.” He said, effortlessly pulling a packet of cigarettes from his pocket and offering her one. For a moment he was going to question why she was telling him this, but then it occurred to him how little he actually knew about her; about any of these people for that matter.  Since they’d last spoken he’d expected things to be awkward and uncomfortable, but instead they seemed to have gone in the opposite direction. “Sounds like the worst though. Been in New York as long as I can remember and this is the first one I’ve had to suffer through. You probably wouldn’t have had a repeat if Epsilon and Alpha Kappa didn’t have shitty plumbing.” He shrugged, knowing that it was more the fault of the weather than the houses but finding too tempting to take a swipe.

It was almost a reflex, reaching out to grab a cigarette, lighting it, taking a drag as if she was mirroring his moves. They’d ended up being more alike than she’d thought, and it felt comfortable now, but it was scary in a way she could tell would end up coming back to bite them. “Honestly? There’s a bit of presidential neglect there, you’d think the houses with the rich kids would hire someone to prevent this kind of thing,” she agreed, though she could barely remember who the presidents were right now. Walking in silence for a moment, she stared up at the sky, too dark and empty thanks to the big cities. California had more stars in her side of the state, Seoul had none, but it felt like a thought too cheesy to share, even if they were actually having a conversation for once. “You said the other day that you have a little sister?” she asked suddenly, because thinking about California always made her think about her siblings and her heart ached a little. “Is your family in New York too, then? Must be nice, having them close enough to like, go visit.”

[claravlee]

luckythepunk:

Though it would be a lie to say that he wasn’t slightly disappointed that she declined, it had been a minor miracle that she had taken the bottle to begin with rather than simply throwing it at him. The sound of screaming and splashing drew his attention back towards the body of water taking up most of the room, and Lucky found himself scowling once again at those within it. He didn’t have any right to be angry about them enjoying the night, but he just couldn’t wash the bitterness away. It was easy to understand why she felt uncomfortable knowing what he knew now, and the longer he sat there the more he found himself resenting his peers. “Sounds better than sitting here alone and brooding. Sure you don’t want one for the road?” He shrugged, grabbing the bottle by the neck and pushing himself to his feet. It was definitely not their normal way of doing things, but it was almost refreshing not to be screaming their lungs out for once. Lucky started towards the door only turning to face her with an ever so slight smile, more out of relief at leaving than anything else. “We walking, or?”

It was so nice to be finally leaving the party behind, it had been stressful and Clara was honestly keeping her fingers mentally crossed that pool parties wouldn’t become a thing after this. Getting to her feet and hurrying after him, she nodded, mirroring his relieved half smile. “Please, I’ve had enough of being threatened to get thrown into the pool, I’m ready to be as far from big bodies of water as possible,” she nodded, heading out. It was funny how this wasn’t even the longest conversation they’d had without fighting or fucking so far, since last time had been so bizarre. Playing with her fingers, a little nervous as the noises of the party started to fade behind them, she found the silence less awkward than she’d expected, though still uncomfortable. “Don’t laugh, but I’m from -- technically I’m from Seoul, but I lived most of my life in Venice Beach, in like, the side of California with the sunniest, warmest weather, where every party is a pool party,” she said, chuckling a little herself at her own misfortune. “I’m pretty familiar with sitting awkwardly at the side of a pool, but I’d always hoped it’d be too cold here to have a repeat.”

[claravlee]

luckythepunk:

It was safe to say that Lucky hadn’t expected that. His face was filled with bemused surprise as she took the bottle, it quickly devolved into a full throated laugh as she reacted to the taste with a distorted face. Cinnamon vodka was perhaps a little ambitious as the drink to break ones sobriety. Though he would say that it was the alcohol that had made people more tolerable, there was no denying that Clara seemed to be acting more human around him recently…. or humane, at the very minimum and he’d found himself wanting to reciprocate. “Holy shit, Clara Vee acting like a normal college student. I didn’t think I’d ever see the day.” He chuckled, a faint look of amusement still ghosting over his features. Why she’d done it was a mystery that he couldn’t solve, but it was also one that he had no desire to attempt. “You want something fruity I know a guy that can mix you something that isn’t too strong.”

“Honestly, I think I’m good for now,” she said, running her fingers through her hair to push it out of her face as she glanced back at him. She wasn’t used to being like this around him -- around other people, upon first meeting them, she could be like this, but never with someone who’d already been around for so long. “I’m probably just gonna head back in a bit, I’ve been around long enough that everyone’s seen me being sociable and stuff, and honestly -- I don’t know, the pool thing makes me uneasy, I’d rather go home and make good use of the one time I’ll have the house to myself,” she shrugged her shoulders, chewing on her lip for a moment before looking back at him. “You’re welcome to come, whenever you get bored, but I’ll understand if you don’t wanna. This isn’t how we usually do things, I guess.”

[claravlee]

luckythepunk:

He wasn’t sure whether to smile or roll his eyes as he heard the familiar voice. After a second of internal debating he settled on the latter before turning his head to face her. As usual he had no idea exactly where their interaction would lead, but even if they ended up screaming at each other he’d feel natural than he did staring out into the water. “Vee.” Lucky nodded in greeting, his face expressionless. For a moment he considered telling her to leave him, but she seemed about as uncomfortable as he was and frankly it was relieving to not be the only one feeling out of place. “It’s a shit party anyway. Not much of a vibe to kill.” He shrugged, not meaning to sound quite as sharp as he had. After sipping from the bottle, he extended it out towards her already knowing the reaction he expected. “I assume you’re being a buzzkill like usual?”

Raising her eyebrows at his tone, Clara could certainly appreciate the weird, unspoken sort of bonding thing that they had going now. She hadn’t meant for it to happen, but it made her more comfortable around him, even if she didn’t doubt at all that he’d end up making her yell at him real soon despite it. Eyeing the bottle he was offering her, she hesitated for a moment. “What’s in it? I don’t -- you know I don’t drink but honestly, this kind of parties makes me wonder if maybe I shouldn’t give in a little to peer pressure,” she said, biting on her lip. “One drink won’t hurt, right?” she asked, grabbing the bottle before he could answer and taking the tiniest sip. It burnt her throat, but she figured after years of sobriety she shouldn’t have expected anything less. It wasn’t like she had a vow to respect or anything, her ban on drinking completely self imposed to avoid feeling vulnerable and powerless when she was surrounded by people, but Lucky felt less like a threat than everyone else lately. “Maybe I should start with fruity drinks or something,” she said with a short laugh, making a face at the taste.

[claravlee]

ninamorrissey:

A grin growing on Nina’s face as the girl made a suggestion, “honestly Clara, we should’ve been friends sooner.” Laughing as she followed by the girl, pushing the gold case into her pocket to assure it wasn’t going to fall out.  “Also surprised you’re talking to me, most people are keeping their distance.” It had become very evident to nina as the night went on but she was buzzing due to toxins that she most gladly took to get her mind on one way thinking people. 

"I don’t listen to rumors,” Clara said, shrugging one shoulder. She did her best to stay away from the gossip blog and all that, and even though tonight it had been impossible not to overhear people talking about Nina, she knew better than to pay attention. “They’re usually blown out of proportion -- and even if they weren’t, you’ve never done anything to me, I’m not here to judge but to have a fun night, and you’re great company as far as I’m concerned,” she added with a smile, looking up at the girl. “

[claravlee]

ninamorrissey:

This whole week had been so full on and Nina was only just getting by in her opinion, but that was nothing to what she let on to the public eye. Her body clad in a red lace body suit and a tight black mini skirt, she had been hoping this party would distract her from the mess she voluntarily dove into and created. Sighing as a buzz filtered through her body not just from alcohol, she ran her hands through her dark hair, tucking it behind her ears. A smile loosely appearing on her face at the sight of a familiar face, Clara. “Enjoying yourself?” Curious to if she was going to mention her outbreak or not, hoping it was not, she really didn’t want to have to walk away from someone over that.

@claravlee

This wasn’t her scene at all, but Clara was trying her best to blend in, having chosen to wear capri pants and a bikini top since it was the most bare she could go while still feeling somewhat safe and covered up. It was fun, for the most part, especially watching the pool and how everyone eventually ended up getting pushed into it, and she was laughing at some poor soul who’d been thrown in while wearing jeans when someone approached her. “Nina,” she grinned, glad to see someone she felt comfortable around for once. “Actually, yeah, you should come sit with me, this is the perfect spot for watching people get mercilessly thrown into the pool without getting splashed.”

[claravlee]

luckythepunk:

After the last few parties had proven to be joyless affairs, it was almost surprising that this one had proved not to be disappointing. At one point he’d even found himself talking to people without having the urge to punch them, though that probably had more to do with the beer and spirits in his system than anything else. The group he’d been hanging with had abandoned him in favour of the water, leaving him sitting propped up against the wall alone with a bottle of vodka once again. His prosthesis prevented him from joining them, so he had decided to drink away his frustration at his limitations. There was a buzz of life in the room, but the crowds weren’t as claustrophobic as usual. Despite that, he didn’t even register the nearby figure that he was fairly sure had been speaking to him. “What?” He asked, his voice flat as he took another swig and didn’t bother to look up. “Seriously. What do you want? You standing there is kind of killing my vibe.”

If parties weren’t Clara’s scene, pool parties were so far out in the spectrum she could barely think of them as real things people willingly went to. It still felt like she ought to show up, in the name of Theta Psi and all that, but it felt weird seeing everyone around in such little clothing, as if everyone being either drunk or high didn’t make her feel out of place enough. Sighing, she went back inside, hoping to find a familiar face or a place she could hide in, have a smoke or two before escaping subtly. Lucky wasn’t the person she’d meaning to spot at all, but there was no one else around, and at least he didn’t seem to be enjoying everything Clara felt so cut off from. “Sorry,” she said, raising her eyebrows as she stared at him, trying to get an idea of how drunk he was exactly. “Didn’t mean to kill your vibe, was just passing by.” She held her hands up in sign of surrender, unsure of whether she should stay or go. “Thought I’d say hi, but if you’re not feeling like it I can just leave you to do your thing.”