[tall]

[maxxie-or-smth]

you've met me at a very "yeah i'm trying to work on that" time in my life

[vulpinesaint]

saying "question mark?" and "however comma," out loud are game changers. punctuation on the go. and it's always the funniest thing that anyone around you has ever heard

[teaboot]

Hi I'm so sorry I don't mean to embarass you but I think your headphones fell out of your phone, it must have happened at the bus stop, your phone has just been playing out loud in your hand this whole time and you didn't notice. So sorry, you must be so embarrassed, really I wouldn't have said anything but I know I'd be mortified if that happened to me and I didn't notice until I got home or something. I'd be so self conscious, can you imagine people thinking you were being disruptive and obnoxious on purpose. Haha yeah no worries have a great day

[batsandboba]

“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know

[pisshandkerchief]

"I'm sweating like a pig": scientifically innacurate (pigs don't sweat), mean (kind of implies you think pigs are gross :( not cool dawg)

"I'm sweating like a motherfucker: realistic. you probably would sweat if you fucked someone's mother. implies you've got game

[cpericardium]

hey everyone "I" have something to show "you"

[cpericardium]

[cpericardium]

[jovishark]

some advice for people entering their 20s:

-dont go to the emergency room with dental problems. go to the dentist

-bagged greens are cheaper than pre-made salads

-taco bell is NOT worth the money anymore. 1/4 cup mayo, 1/4 cup sour cream, 3 tblspoons pickled jalapenos+2tblspoons of the jar liquid, 2 tsp paprika 1 tsp cumin 1 tsp garlic powder 1 tsp onion powder salt+pepper. all in your blender. creamy jalapeno sauce

-dont quit your job unless you have a bunch of job interviews lined up immediately after

-use resources. food bank, unemployment, housing assistance, financial aid, etc. yes there will be paperwork. but Do It

-dont stay awake longer than 20 hours. you Will start to become impulsive and cranky. resting for 20 minutes is better than trying to stay awake

-for every 2 hours you spend looking up close at screens, spend 20 minutes looking at something far away from you. stretch your wrists a lot

-dont do that yoga stretch where you roll your head around your shoulders. youre grinding down the joints in your neck

-be nice to your friends, bullying them as a joke gets old. if you need a ride somewhere at least offer them gas money

-brush your teeth at any time of the day but especially before you sleep. dont snack in bed if you can help it. make your bed the Clean Teeth Zone. keep floss picks by your bed

-dont tell your boss youre adhd/autism/depression/suicidal. dont trust your coworkers with that. you NEVER know how people will take it and its none of their business

-train your pets to go to the front door when they hear a fire alarm

-get regular oil changes

[ostolero]

“I think white gay people feel cheated because they were born, in principle, into a society in which they were supposed to be safe. The anomaly of their sexuality puts them in danger, unexpectedly. Their reaction seems to me in direct proportion to the sense of feeling cheated of the advantages which accrue to white people in a white society. There’s an element, it has always seemed to me, of bewilderment and complaint. Now that may sound very harsh, but the gay world as such is no more prepared to accept black people than anywhere else in society. It’s a very hermetically sealed world with very unattractive features, including racism.”

— James Baldwin, from a 1984 interview given with Richard Goldstein, in the Village Voice

[scarecrowsaliva]

because so many people missed the point of this on the original posts notes,

James Baldwin (a gay human rights activist and author of the 50s and 60s) was pointing out that communities that are minorities are still part of the larger population and are still going to fall into oppressive beliefs within their communities and as a white queer person it is extremely important to make sure your acceptance includes BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, People of color), do not make excuses to deny anyone the right to live as they are when you cry about your own discrimination.

community and solidarity is the only right answer.

[the-haiku-bot]

community and

solidarity is the

only right answer.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[rapidlydecayingcorpse]

i feel like people aren't getting how dire ai is. we are running out of drinkable water. our brains aren't engaging as much with what we see and hear. people near data centers don't get clean water and experience electricity blackouts. it's being used to make pornography of underaged people and women. it often just lies. it affirms everything. it lies. it has made people kill themselves. it lies for gods sake. and people act as if im dramatic for being staunchly against it. 'now i KNOOW you hate ai and whatever, but look at this cute video' this isn't me being a new age puritan about internet videos, this is about the fucking earth and our future living on this planet. people are suffering now, people will suffer more, and my friends and parents will roll their eyes and think im annoying for despising ai so explicitly. we need to wake up because we cannot live like this

[haughtyraban]

“there’s an ai tool for that” okay ?? there’s probably an ed sheeran song for it too who gives a fuck

[anarchistmemedistro]

[calder]

vegans make peace with honey

no shut up do it

[calder]

vegans will pretend not to hear when natives tell them their agave products are unsustainable because they have whimsical feelings about, and i cannot stress this enough, the freedom of hive insects

Honey is literally murder but go off

[kasaron]

Prove it.

They literally puke their guts up to make your honey

[kasaron]

I have not seen any evidence tonsugges they are harmed or die in the process of production. They do regurgitate the nectar as part of the process to concentrate it into honey (an interesting process) but they do not suffer any injury during this process. If they did, the cost to produce honey, which is done naturally as a measure to survive over winter and through times of lower availability, would outweigh the benefits. If you kill several bees to produce enough honey to make one more bee, It makes no sense. Any animal that did that would die, even with human intervention.

Do you have any sources which suggest otherwise? I’d be interested to hear of this (relatively publicly available) information was false or misunderstood.

Bee farmers use whats called a honey maker. It’s a crude devices. It similar to a meat grinder. They force the bees in and grind them up. What comes out is a paste. That paste is later filtered into what we know as honey

[hematite2]

This is the funniest thing I’ve ever read

[leonardo-nierman]

@zoologicallyobsessed please show us pics of your bee grinder

[gemstone-gynoid]

they might be falsely thinking about a honey extractor machine. but all these do is you place the beehive frames inside and a motor rotates it at a speed that removes the honey, which is then tapped through a tap at the bottom. 

[darkenedyeastextract]

…do they think they put bees in that and spin them around until they vomit…?

[demonius-darkblade]

bee carnival

[yeah-yeah-beebiss-1]

bad and naughty bees get put into the b e e c e n t r i f u g e to extract their honey

[bastlynn]

Vegans coming after beekeepers is one of my major teeth grinding annoyances. For many reasons, because there’s so many lies. And to go one step further because it’s such a waste. You see, the strongest vegan argument is that they don’t want to exploit animals or take from them without their consent.

… but… Bees consent. NO. I’M NOT KIDDING.

How? Bee hives aren’t kept on leashes. They’re outside, the bees can travel miles every day. They follow their queen. Who is also outside, not on a leash, and can travel miles every day. If she doesn’t like the hive for any reason - for example: it got too hot, too cold, too messy, too filled with sugary stuff and they need more space… then the queen leaves. And with her the hive.

The queen stays in the hive because the hive is the best place to live. Period. Done. End of. If the hive is staying with the beekeeper it’s because the keeper is doing their job correctly and keeping them happy because the bees can, and do, leave bad beekeepers.

Of all the animals we have domesticated as livestock, bees are the ones you can most easily argue are consenting participants in their keeping.

[alicentsgf]

[mystical-mew]

Here it is. The bee post is back

[korrasera]

I feel compelled to explain the misconception part for anyone who doesn’t know anything about beekeeping and finds any of this confusing. This might be a little redundant, but I’m scratching an itch.

Harvesting honey does not murder bees.

The device pictured above does not mash up bees or their hives.

There’s no ethical concern when it comes to eating honey, it’s totally ethical as food is concerned.

Bees manufacture honey using pollen. They store it in the cells of their hive, where it’s used as food for the colony, particularly the larvae growing into the next generation of bees.

When you harvest honey, you remove parts of the hive that are being used to store the honey, without taking any bees along for the ride. Those parts of the hive are then put into a device, like the centrifugal extractor shown above by gemstone-gynoid, where the parts are spun really fast to pull extract the honey. The honey gets collected on the walls of the extractor, drips down, and can then be filtered and bottled for human use.

So.

It turns out that bees love making honey and can make more of it than they’d ever need. It also turns out that beekeepers taking care of hives and harvesting their honey keeps bees healthy and thriving, more so than they’d normally accomplish on their own. And we really need bees healthy and thriving because they help us grow an astonishing amount of food by pollinating plants.

Like, there’s no need to have a conversation about this, anyone who claims that harvesting honey requires that you kill bees is lying. Either they don’t know anything about beekeeping and are just repeating a lie someone else told them, or they know that they’re lying and they’re just straight up trying to deceive people. Neither is a good look.

[stormingchaos12]

mmmmm yes my favorite chicken nugget condiment

m a s h e d b e e

[the-haiku-bot]

mmmmm

yes my favorite chicken

nugget condiment

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[mckitterick]

[mckitterick]

On April 13, 1985, Danuta Danielsson - a Jewish-Polish woman whose mother was taken to a concentration camp in WWII - hit a local neonazi with her handbag in Växjö, Sweden.

Update: The neonazis were subsequently expelled from the city, and a statue was erected in her honor.

This week 34 years ago, Danuta Danielsson demonstrated how much respect fascists deserve.

[vbartilucci]

Well played, Danuta Danielsson.

And good aim.

[alys-is-rabbit]

She hit them so hard they were banished from that land forever. Iconic

[mckitterick]

Happy 40th Annual Hit a Nazi with a Handbag Day

[molotovblogtail]

Happy 41st Annual Hit a Nazi with a Handbag Day

[the-haiku-bot]

Happy 41st

Annual Hit a Nazi

with a Handbag Day

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[depsidase]

[illmadekn1ght]

every day it gets harder to have a relaxed jaw and decent posture

[albamelody]

i recently saw a tiktok where a woman asked "girlies: what are some things you do to be more whimsical? I love knowing cute little habbits"

and i've never loved a comment section more. some of my faves:

(˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶)

[dovewithscales]

I talk to basically everything as if it's a person. I greet passing crows as my "cousins." I respond conversationally to my cats. I yell "same to you!" when inanimate objects make loud noises. I say good morning to plants. I thank my phone when an alarm goes off. When objects don't act the way I want them to I explain what I need them to do, or tell them they're being rude. I tell my car when we're stopping for gas.

[naamahdarling]

I reassure credit card readers who are struggling that I know they are doing their best. Bless you, you funky lil machine, I'm sorry my dad is part of the reason people hate you. :(

[worldbuilding-tomfoolery]

I'll be stealing that one and that one and that one, thank you very much!

[the-haiku-bot]

I’ll be stealing that

one and that one and that one,

thank you very much!

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.