Monterey Bay Aquarium
tannertan36
if i look back, i am lost
blake kathryn
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
YOU ARE THE REASON
#extradirty
No title available
macklin celebrini has autism
trying on a metaphor
shark vs the universe
occasionally subtle
🪼
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
d e v o n
roma★
DEAR READER
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
dirt enthusiast
seen from France
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from Australia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from India
seen from United States
seen from Netherlands
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from China
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@clonerightsagenda
Okay I was double-checking to remember that yes both podcast characters WERE named Glass. An so I googled it. And,
He very much did NOT survive the war lmaoooooo that's kind of his primary character trait
classic case of men taking credit for women's work in academia smh. someone should blow him up in space about it
what the hell is going on
i believe in you Binface. you can do it. this could be your moment.
Please god it would be so funny
there is no downside to voting for Count Binface. its not taking away from other candidates bcos they aren't any and the more votes he gets the stupider Farage looks.
for people out of the loop:
Nigel Farage is the leader of Reform UK, a far right party who are currently in the process of a serious bid to become the UK government. they are just straight up evil.
Count Binface is an intergalactic space warrior with a bin on his head. he likes to run as a novelty candidate in general and mayoral elections. a big thing he likes to do is run as a candidate against the incumbent prime minister:
(Also pictured: Boris Johnson, Elmo)
Anyway, in brief:
Nigel Farage is currently in the midst of a big scandal about his finances
He has decided to deal with this by 1) making a show of nobly resigning from parliament and then 2) immediately running in the resulting by-election
He has stated that he is letting 'the people' judge his actions and implied that if he wins that will prove that he has been exonerated in the court of public opinion
His goal was presumably to get a big resounding win over the other parties, proving that The People still love him.
the other parties have thus far decided that this is a 'vanity election' and, well, there is one very easy way to ensure that he will not beat any of them, and that is simply not to play.
and as a result the only person who has so far confirmed they are running against him is Count Binface. no matter the outcome this makes Nigel Farage look like, u know, a fucking clown.
So what happens if Count Binface actually wins? Does he join Parliament? Does he have to take the bin off his face?
I've seen some people saying he would have to give up his title but it would seem that is no longer the case as of 1999; so, no, he can keep his ceremonial bin if he wishes.
Important to note also that Count Binface is the alter ego of comedian & political satirist Jon Harvey who seems to be an intelligent individual with reasonable politics. As I said no real downside.
The no hats rule clearly does not apply to him. He is not wearing a hat. It's a bin.
In updates, Parliament has confirmed that Count Binface won't be allowed to wear the bin or costume in Parliament:
He also did an interview:
shout out to characters who died for womanpain. u may have died but at least u gave a bitch something interesting to reckon with. ur sacrifice will be appreciated o7 o7 o7
Medical TMI under the cut
For the most part I'm perfectly content that I can't use tampons but I can't deny that they would come in handy when I've got open surgical wounds in the area. My incision keeps getting glued to stuff.
Strengthening my conviction that she exists in some kind of timewarp, my boss today complained that an organization was no longer accepting mailed paper checks and instead was "going to pull the information from the check and take it out electronically", asked me if I sent paper checks, and when I said no I did autopay, asked if my parents had made the switch as well. ("Decades ago," was my reply.) She then speculated as to how she will know that the money has been taken out and how you'd alert your utilities that you were moving. I suggested the online portal and she responded "Huh! I guess we're going in that direction."
Spin the wheel. That's who's trying to kill you.
Spin the wheel again. That’s who’s trying to protect you.
(If you have zero idea about a name you got, spin until you see someone you recognize.)
Are you safe?
Absolutely not. I'm dead. 100% dead.
I might stay alive, but it'll be a really close thing.
I'll take some hits, for certain, but I should be okay in the end.
A few attacks might get through, but nothing concerning.
The attacker might be able to get in one lucky hit. If that.
I am the opposite of worried. I'm 100% safe.
…Look. I've tried picturing this. But I honestly don't know how to answer.
(I've run this poll twice before, expanding it significantly for the second run. With about a year passed since that second run, I thought it was time to add another couple hundred names to the list and have another go.)
Tired of enduring tribulations. Don't wanna be tribulated no more.
remember that guy that had a single auditory hallucination that told him he had a brain tumor and the exact location and then he went to the doctor and it was fucking right
“i also choose this guy’s dead wife” was easily the #1 funniest thing to ever be written on the internet.
you can know the punchline but you can’t stop it from punching you.
i do also feel the need to add that phil8248 really liked the joke. he said his wife had always had a dark sense of humour, even about her illness and death, and seeing the joke made him feel like he was laughing with her one last time.
cats always step precisely on your most sensitive areas when theyre crawling on you lovingly for cuddles. bladder dick ovaries boobs stomach bruise it doesnt matter. they have homing devices on their paws for the exact area you’re most tender at the moment and they put their full weight into that step. and sometimes they might keep their stance midstride so theyre just standing there forever forcing you to endure the pain. because they are simply too cute to get mad at
Thinking about a new bit where i start using “workers of the world” as my go-to second person plural pronoun. Like “chat”.
Workers of the world what do we think of this. Is it funny.
Workers of the world please like and reblog my post
surely there was a less sinister way for my insurance portal to describe getting Botox for bruxism
started the last book in the Neapolitan quartet
if Ancelstierre keeps moving into the future and the royal family keeps sending their kids to school there, eventually the next Abhorsen might be that person who brings a guitar to a party and plays Wonderwall
we have to be prepared for this eventuality
next week on Douchebag Abhorsen: today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw (a Mordicant) back to (beyond the Ninth Gate)
and the week after: bullying the Wallmakers until they make an Old Kingdom-friendly Juul
Won't you help me Doctor Three 🎓
