traitor .

don't say i'm out of touch with this rampant chaos , your reality . i know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge . the nightmare i built my own world to escape .

[coldhallelu]

hi  i’m  trev  !  below  ,  you  will  find  links  to  my  characters’  abouts  and  some  other  important  information !

kieran  moretti  .

august  shelby 

holland  hayes  .

owen  kamra  .

joaquin ‘ quin ‘ garcia .

orion day .

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

he knew that they would have found the utmost enjoyment in that ,  seeing josh get flustered in front of the townspeople that had done nothing short of shunning kieran over the years .  if people didn’t know before ,  they may have known now ,  bev certainly noticed and joshua was sure he’d get an earful at some point ,  though he didn’t see how anything in his personal life affected her whatsoever .  the man resumed his sermon ,  finishing on time and managing not to get too tongue twisted again ,  simply by avoiding kieran’s stare until it came to communion ;  there the two shared a look ,  a simple ,  longing look ,  and then nothing .

when mass came to an end ,  he ventured outside to see off the people in attendance ;  standard procedure ,  but there were two who didn’t quite seem to make it to the exit .  joshua made his way back inside ,  only managing to catch what kieran said to bev in return .  he lifted a brow ,  approaching the two ,  “  is  something  wrong ?  ”  he questioned ,  almost daring either of them to state the obvious .  

-     

       maybe kieran wondered if it would still be there the next day . maybe they wondered if the spark had fizzled out after the night they shared and maybe that was part of the reason why they had chosen to show up to mass . the stumble of josh’s words was one hint but when communion came around and the two looked at each other , it was very clear that nothing fizzled out just because something finally happened between the two of them .

kieran seemed to look up when they heard josh’s voice , glancing back towards bev , wondering if she would offer an answer or if they would simply stand here in silence as if they were getting scolded by an elder for behaving like two teenagers . ‘  nothings  wrong  ,  father , ‘ kieran finally spoke but their eyes didn’t seem to leave bev .

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

nicky knew that it would come as a surprise ,  holland may have very well known that he was unhappy in his marriage ,  but divorce before separation could have been a shock to anybody ,  let alone someone close to the family .  he tipped his head up ,  his lips twitching ever so slightly .  “  no ,  I  pay  your  wage ,  you’ll  remain  with  me ,  and  so  will  the  children .  I’m  willing  to  share  custody ,  but  I  know  my  wife  won’t  fight  me  on  it .  ”

     holland nodded his head . that put him at ease a little bit . ‘  and  ...  this  is  what  you  want  ?  a  divorce  ? ‘ maybe holland could see that coming from a mile away and he hadn’t even been here long . it was difficult not to see how the two didn’t seem like a normal couple but holland couldn’t help but ask .

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

to say that harley didn’t exactly need the job was something of an understatement ,  holland and harley did just fine for themselves ,  or they had once .  harley would have been lying if they said that holland’s success hadn’t spurred their own ,  and their art did well ,  out on the mainland and everywhere on the internet ,  but their life was here ,  their day-to-day lifestyle was here ,  and they needed something to pass the time ,  why not work ?  they shrugged their shoulders at orion’s question ,  chuckling ,  “  because  I’m  passionate  about  serving  the  town  drunks ,  ”  they murmured ,  nodding in thanks to the cigarette and not hesitating to spark up ,  before handing over their lighter to orion .

   if orion was being honest with himself , the hayes family always seemed to stand out here . hell , the morettis seemed to stand out here too . there was something about them that said that they could do better than this town and for the most part , some of them did and yet , they all lived here or returned here for one reason or another . it was almost confusing if you allowed yourself to think too long about it . ‘  oh  is  that  it ? ‘ orion asked , a smirk tugging at their lips as they took the cigarette and sparked it up before handing the lighter back . the two moved down the sidewalk , ‘  don’t  ever  think  about  getting  out  of  this  hell  hole ? ‘ 

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

he nodded his head ,  offering a sigh .  it wasn’t exactly the best idea ,  but what choice did he have ?  it had already begun ,  and joshua wasn’t sure he could stop now ,  even if he wanted to .  “  jeg  tager  ikke  denne  beslutning  let ,  men  jeg  kan  ikke  holde  mig  væk  fra  dem .  ”

     august knew he could have over analyzed this . he could have gotten to the root of it but he had learned a long time ago that it didn’t do anything for the two of them in the long run .  he knew that this wasn’t a decision that josh would take lightly but he also knew that josh probably wouldn’t be so quick to throw away the congregation either .  ‘ gør  hvad  du  skal  gøre  . ‘ it was august’s own way of telling josh that he would support him no matter what his decision was .

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

he never imagined in a million years that kieran would be stepping foot in his mass again ,  not after the first time ,  not knowing how they felt about the religious aspect of this town ,  even in the most respectful way .  however ,  joshua was wrong .  it seemed that they did not hesitate to turn up the next morning ,  something that the priest did not realise right away ,  but did when he finally reached the altar his eyes scanned the people attending . 

he’d already began his word ,  and the moment their gazes found one another ,  joshua found his confidence wavering slightly ,  stuttering over a handful of words ,  something bev instantly glared at him for ,  more so when she realised who his gaze remained on .  josh eventually cleared his throat ,  tearing away his eyes from kieran ,  focusing on anybody else ,  anything else .  “  sorry ,  ”  the man breathed ,  starting again ,  offering an apologetic smile to his congregation ,  and continuing .

     - 

            kieran’s lips almost twitched when their eyes met and josh seemed to stumble over his words . it wasn’t lost on everyone and it certainly wasn’t lost on bev who seemed to shoot josh a nasty glare . he apologized and continued on and kieran sat there quietly , listening to every word although her thoughts were a little less than innocent and she had no shame for it . not here in god’s house and certainly not anywhere else .

kieran rose when they were ultimately dismissed although she seemed to be quickly confronted by bev who clearly wasn’t happy that kieran had shown up . the first time bev could give a pass for but this ? kieran wasn’t going to get that a second time . ‘  maybe  i’ve  turned  over  a  new  leaf  ,  bev , ‘ kieran hummed , ‘  isn’t  that  what  you’ve  always  wanted  ? ‘ it wasn’t and the both of them knew that . bev would have been happier if kieran never stepped foot in this church ever again . 

[coldhallelu]

rclics​:

-

The offer catches her off guard. Something she hadn’t even considered, really. But she does consider it for a moment then. The sad part is, she’s a horribly sentimental person. She knows that if she kept the book, she would think of Owen every time she looked at it, and while that sounds appealing, to hold onto her sentimentality, she’s able to recognize that at least in this instance, it’s probably not healthy.

“I don’t think so.” Her face wrinkles when she looks up at him, her tone suggesting the fact that it’s probably not a good idea. “I’ll just set it down.” She looks around herself, tapping the book again before placing it down next to the cobbler. 

When her arms are free, she pats her thighs and gives Owen a crooked smile. “So, how are you?”

     the offer was on the table if flora wanted to take it . owen’s words had been true : he didn’t even raelize that he was missing a cookbook until flora had said something and it was only then did he realize that his collection was looking a bit light . he nodded his head when she spoke again , ‘ well ,  if  you  ever  want  it  or  ...  want  to  take  a  look  through  it ... ‘ just because they were divorced didn’t mean that owen had to shut himself off completely when it came to flora . there was no real bad blood here and he wasn’t going to pretend like that was the case . at the question , he hummed , ‘  i’m ...  doing  okay .  working .  coming  home .  the  usual .  what  about  you ?  how  are  you ? ‘ 

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

nicky reached out ,  patting the man’s hand ,  “  don’t  be  so  sure ,  mi  amigo ,  you  are  young ,  and talented …  do  not  shut  yourself  off .  ”  he turned away ,  focusing once again on the food ,  not bothering to look up when holland questioned him ,  “  I’m  getting  a  divorce .  ”

   holland seemed to skip over the first thing nicholas said as he continued . he stared at the man , waiting for the punch line but it never came . ‘  excuse  me  ,  what ? ‘ holland asked , ‘  i  mean ,  sorry  ,  but  also  is  this  going  to  be  like  a  split  the  baby  thing  because  if  so  i  think  you’re  over  estimating  my  capabilities  here . ‘ 

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

“  I  can  deal  with  that ,  ”  harley offered in return ,  winking back at the other ,  before glancing to the door as the couple rushed out of the restroom .  they shook their head ,  tsking quietly ,  before grabbing their keys from the side and jumping over the bar ,  “  shall  we ? ”

     a smirk tugged at orion’s lips as he watched the couple emerge from the restroom before looking back at harley . ‘  yeah . ‘ the two moved out of the bar and when they stepped outside , orion pulled his pack of cigarettes from his pocket , pulling one out for himself before offering it in harley’s direction . ‘  why  do  you  work  at  this  shitty  little  bar  again ?  i  mean ,  no  offense  . ‘ 

[coldhallelu]

-  

      kieran shouldn’t be doing this . they knew that , and yet , taunting josh in a room full of people was the most interesting thing they could think to do that day especially after their night together . kieran could have waited but where was the fun in that ? when they walked into mass that day , they practically could hear a pin drop . this wasn’t kieran’s place and everyone knew that . kieran didn’t simply just go to mass and most probably gave kieran a pass when the new priest showed up but now ? now was going to ask questions .

they barely made eye contact with anyone there but they did raise their gaze to meet with bev’s who seemed to be staring a hole into kieran . they smiled sweetly although their eyes told another story as they found a spot near the front of the church . @ofbeliefs​

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

he pursed his lips ,  “  is  that  true ?  ”  nicky questioned ,  unsure of the entire details of what happened around holland’s life ,  he’d never thought to pry ,  and the two hadn’t dove into his life when he began working for the family .  “  well ,  if  that’s  what  you  believe …  I  should  tell  you  that  I  may  need  your  help  all  the  more  soon .  ”

     ‘  yeah , ‘ holland spoke , dropping their gaze after a moment , opting to finish off their drink . ‘  there’s  nothing  to  go  back  to . ‘ holland decided to leave it there , looking back at the older man when he continued . ‘  yeah ? ‘ holland questioned , ‘  why’s  that  ? ‘ the reasoning didn’t really seem to matte rmuch in the long run but holland was curious .

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

nicholas looked back at his friend ,  a friend that usually kept his opinion to himself ,  a friend that had never passed comment or judgement on nicholas or his choices ,  even when they were the most foolish ;  like marrying his wife in the first place .  he itched at his jaw ,  staring back at the other ,  the silence stretching longer than it ought to .  the man breathed in deeply ,  and let it out slowly ,  “  don’t  say  never .  ”

    a certain silence seemed to fall between the two of them but it was nicholas that eventually broke it . his expression seemed to soften as he looked back at his friend , ‘  have  i  ever  ? ‘ they had always been ships in the night with each other . always on a different page or a different road . nicholas went one way and quin went the other . they got into their own careers , got married , and had their own lives . there was never a point where the two could meet . it was sad , really , but quin tried not to dwell on it too much . ‘  i’m  always  here ,  nicky . ‘ 

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

harley smirked ,  managing a laugh as they nodded their head .  they’d almost forgotten about their friends ,  who appeared to be coming to the end of their rather public rendezvous .  they sighed ,  squeezing orion’s hand and moved towards the door ,  banging a little harder this time ,  “  get  out ,  or  I’m  locking  y’all  in .  ”  they moved back to the bar ,  clearing away the rest of their things ,  “  what’re  you  thinking ?  ”

     orion almost chuckled as he watched harley go back to the bathroom before returning to the bar . ‘  well ,  there’s  dinner  which  leaves  the  diner  .  i  mean  the  food  there  isn’t  bad . ‘ and it was cheap . it wasn’t as if someone like orion was exactly rolling in the dough around here . ‘  dinner  and  light  petting  under  the  table .  we  can  kill  two  birds  with  one  stone . ‘ 

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

“  hmm ,  ”  nicky murmured ,  turning his attention back to the food ,  “  they’re  loveable ,  but …  is  this  really  what  you  want ,  holland ?  ”  he questioned ,  unsure why he felt now was the time to discuss this ,  “  not  that  I  don’t  view  you  as  a  vital  member  of  our  family ,  you  are ,  but  should  this  be …  a  temporary  stepping  stone ,  I  want  you  to  know  that  I  will  help  you  get  back  on  your  feet .  ”

    holland looked back at nicky and he couldn’t hide the fact that he was a little surprised that this was the turn that their conversation took . he took in a breath before slowly letting it out , pulling his gaze away from the older man , looking down at his beer before taking another sip of it . ‘  i  appreciate  that , ‘ holland started , looking back at the other man , ‘  but ...  it’s  not  like  i  have  a  career  to  go  back  to . so ...  this  isn’t  temporary . ‘  

[coldhallelu]

nowhereinn​:

her eyes moved up from the floor to quin when she saw from the corner of her eyes that he turned. she was in the wrong - complete wrong. there was no manual she could’ve read for this or a youtube tutorial she could easily search. ‘ yeah… i do have a choice. ’, her confident persona shined through. ‘ no… ’, she shook her head. ‘ we have a lot of talk about. god, we have so much  to talk about. maybe if we talked we wouldn’t even be here right now. ’, her voice was soft and calm, but all she wanted to do was scream. 

    ‘  what  does  that  even  mean ? ‘ quin asked , ‘  be  here  right  now ? ‘ now wasn’t the time or place for this . quin wasn’t sure if he was ready to talk about any of it . he wasn’t sure if he ever would be ready for it .  ‘  what  do  you  want  from  me ,  viv ? ‘ 

[coldhallelu]

ofbeliefs​:

“  yes ,  they  are ,  but  they  deserve  their  mother  and  father  together ,  no ?  ”  he grew less and less convinced by that point every day ,  but nicholas knew that it had been his original claim ,  even if the children barely saw them together anymore .  he itched at his jawline ,  looking the other over ,  “  what  a  waste .  ”

      '  what  does  staying  together  for  the  kids  do  for  anyone  ?  ‘ it was nicholas’ life and marriage but that never stopped quin from trying to give his friend a different perspective . ‘  i  can’t  remember  the  last   time  i’ve  seen  you  two  in  a  room  together  ,  nicky . ‘ and f that was the case for him , he could only wonder when the last time was that the kids saw them two together . quin looked back at his friend . maybe there were a lot of things he wanted to confess in the moment but he kept it to himself even if maybe it was written all over his face . ‘  yeah ,  it  is  . ‘ 

[coldhallelu]

nowhereinn​:

vivenne let out a sigh while her eyes fell to the floor. ‘ well, i’m not taking that. ’, the girl firmly stated. she gave him space, at least she tried to. there were plenty of times she saw quin in an aisle at the store where she quickly ran back to her car where she sat until he was out. but, her lack of self control got the best of her. ‘ i really do want to talk. i don’t know when you’re ready for that, but… i- ’, her voice got weaker as the sentence came out of her mouth. at the end she let out a sigh - not being able to say the words i miss you. 

     ‘  do  you  think  you  have  much  of  a  choice ? ‘ quin asked as he turned back to look at her . he wondered what right she thought she had in any of this . ‘  talk  about   what  ?  the  weather  ?  what  we’re  doing  with  our  lives  ?  our  shitty  marriage  ?   ‘ quin took in a breath after that before slowly letting it out , ‘  we  don’t  have  anything  to  talk  about  ,  viv  . ‘