Conan's Secret Unicorn Love Blog @conan - Tumblr Blog

Lovely. Absolutely lovely. And oh, look at those knees! This image reminds me of one of my favorite Unicornian proverbs:

“Tis a dream come true to be needed by a unicorn,

Tis a nightmare to be KNEED by a unicorn.”

A magnificent and meaningful proverb that has never rung more true than it does today. I would definitely not want to be kneed by this unicorn. No sir. Four knee’s of doom, coming at you! This gorgeous beast is a stunning knee jabbing weapon more powerful than anything the US government has access too. More powerful than any government has ever conceived. And I love that the knee coverings look like fierce bubbles, and I love the curvature of the talons. Incredibly creative and inspiring.

The matching neck and midriff armor is captivating as well. It’s important to protect your midriff. This unicorn knows this and I applaud him for embracing it.

I enjoy the deep purple skin, with the soft shadows made by sharp lines creating a supple texture.

Oh and the ears. I can’t overlook the ears. Before I go, one last Unicornian proverb about ears that point backwards:

“Tis a dream come true to hear with your ears.

Tis a nightmare to hear out your rear.”

Thank you. Thank you.

(Don’t hold the applause)

Dashing eyeball. Perfectly quaffed hair. Enchanting beads of life radiating from the moon burst. Sweet sweet swishy tail. 10 stars.

Thank you for reading!

If you enjoyed this review, there’s more! Please consider preordering my new ebook: “Finally, Unbiased Reviews of Unicorn Images.” It will feature over 50 original unicorn images created by a blessing of talented artists. I’m so excited to share the images with you in the coming weeks and months and excited to share my reviews too! And there will be extra content, images and magical surprises only in the ebook as well. I’m so so excited!

Click here to preorder and for a limited time it’s only $5 :)

And check back every Monday for a brand new unicorn review!

IMAGE CREDITS – Support this amazing artist by following their social media! There is more art where this came from.

Unicorn Image by Breon Bliss

Instagram: @poopernagel

conan

This is how I feel when I have a good hair day. (Which is every day.)

#Conan #unicorn #hair #magic #comedy #funny #hot #sexy

unicornpurity

conan

This is what is inside my pillow that I sleep on.

xfrederiiquee

Small Unicorn tattoo.🦄

conan

Everyone in the audience tonight is getting a free (drumroll!!!!!) unicorn tattoo!!

#unicorn #conan #conan o'brien

unicornpurity

conan

You can’t give a damn when you’re glam Or when your brain has a horn sticking out of it.

#unicorn

s0ft-m0th

♡

conan

I don't normally use brushes to paint frosting on my face, but when I do, the brushes are always made with unicorn tail hair. (harvested ethically of course.)

#unicorns

Do you like my new shoes?

onsta

Best buds~

conan

Me and Andy.

#unicorn #andy richter #conan

broog

Kawaii unicorn floof. Watercolor & brush pen.

conan

Great floof. Best floof I’ve ever seen.

#unicorn

fragileheartxxx

conan

The definition of “Ready to take on whatever shit comes my way. Let’s do this.”

#unicorn

Please, call me Carrot Dapple Rump.

Mr Rump is my unicorn father.

And wow, that description is spot on. I am an eccentric genius with a big imagination. And a dappled beauty. I don’t know what dappled means, but I think it means I put dollops of sour cream on my face to moisturize. Which I do.

And I definitely melt the snow, especially when my rump is on top of it, and everywhere I go I make people sweaty. At least myself.

Spot on Unicorn Name Generator!

http://unicorn.namegeneratorfun.com/

#unicorn #name #generator #conan #conan o'brien

unicornratings

When the tears stop rushing out of my eyes I will be able to write this review. But give me a few moments. This is just too beautiful.

(3 hours later.)

It’s good to cry. If you’re still crying, let me know when you’ve composed yourself, I know its difficult to read with watery eyes. But sometimes you just need to let yourself look at a unicorn and think about everything in the world that makes you happy, (like robots, motorized scooters, pants that don’t show ketchup stains, or equality.) and just cry tears of joy.

Crying is a sign of strength by the way. Some people think crying makes you weak, but baby’s cry, and baby’s are super strong. One time a baby held my finger and tore it off. I used to have an extra middle finger on my right hand. Now I just have the one. Well before it wasn’t THE middle finger, but it was one of the ones that wasn’t on an end.

Back to the unicorn. It has a perfectly fluffy tail with just the right amount of wisp. I can’t get enough of the octopus like mane hair with tantalizing tentacles of beauty. I also really admire the glow radiating from the tip of the horn. Not all horns glow like this, but when they do, it’s a real treat. This unicorn would make a wonderful lighthouse, if it didn’t already have a full time job waiting tables at a vegan restaurant. I know what you’re thinking, Unicorns have jobs? They don’t need money, obviously, and working is their form of charity. They enjoy giving back to the vegans especially considering how weak and frail they can be. (not all vegans, but the ones who work at vegan restaurants and the ones that have pink hair.)

The bold stance compliments the colors and whimsy of the sky. A heavenly unicorn, with a horn that really steals the show. Awesome splashy hooves. Nice nose shading. 10 stars.

conan

Every day is unicorn day. Especially if you’re a unicorn.

#unicorn #conan