When I see these pictures, I just see a boy placed in a body that he neither asked for nor wanted. I see the pain in his eyes, and it’s gut-wrenching. He doesn’t want the long hair or the dresses. He wants to play with the other boys, get mud on his face, and be dared to eat the disgusting concoctions the other boys made. He wanted to date the girls and make inappropriate jokes. He wanted to wear SnapBacks and muddy sneakers and t-shirts that were last cleaned a month ago.
But instead, he’s a girl. He wears the dresses and the pink lipstick and lives to satisfy the people around him. He kept his hair long and he dated boys and he smiled. He smiled and put on the mask of a vibrant, happy-go-lucky girl. She rarely complains and apologizes frequently.
He asks himself, “Why me?” He asks what he did to incur god’s wrath. He wonders why he’s unhappy when he’s seemingly got everything he could have ever wanted. He’s depressed by 12, with seemingly no real reason. He doesn’t understand. Shouldn’t he be happy? Shouldn’t he want this?
Shouldn’t he be a girl?