certified yapper

idk • she/her

[sandmandaddy69]

[goslinggf]

um...exsqueak me ?

[pnglove]

Mate, you’ve got a chubby lizard on your dashboard

[boyhounds]

hockey was a mistake

[yeeandmoreimportantlyhaw]

someone check the refs sports betting apps

[cryptonature]

I was lying in the leaf litter today when some moss spoke to me. "Excuse me, do you know the species of this fallen log beneath me?" asked the moss. "Hmm. No. Sorry, I'm a little fuzzy on logs," I said. "What a coincidence," said the moss. "I'm a little fuzzy on logs too."

[coldswarkids]

when I’m checking out at the register and the cashier is clearly having a horrible day, I feel like I am under so much pressure to speak soooo gently and pleasantly. like I am handling a skittish and traumatized horse. here I am offering my credit card so efficiently. here is an apple from my palm

[newathens]

baby i’ve got half finished wips you couldn’t even imagine

[newathens]

[inber]

let's struggle to dine with mama

[phallusmagnificus]

his fish too big for his goddamn he

[wolfythewitch]

Project Hail Mary if they were common street animals (except Rocky he’s like a sea wasp)

[wolfythewitch]

I don't have breeds for stratt n carl unfortunately I based them off puspin/aspin haha

Yao - eurasian tree sparrow

Ilkhyuna - great tit

Dubois - red winged blackbird

Rocky - sea wasp

[wolfythewitch]

Wait I need to change rocky to like turritopsis dohrnii or moon jellyfish or something I just found out sea wasps live like less than a year long

[wolfythewitch]

ALTERNATIVELY........... rocky as an octopus?

[oldfilmsflicker]

Birders, 2019 (dir. Otilia Portillo Padua)

[ruinedchildhood]

Tigers with a frozen milk brick on a hot day

[dragondriana]

needless to say they are hopelessly dependent on the ingot

[marinella-ela]

[orpheuslament]

yeah im still thinking about the minotaur sorry but just . imagine youre born wrong. imagine your entire existence is a punishment from the gods. for something you had no control over. imagine your mother holds nothing but contempt for you. she wont even look at you, not really, & she keeps crying & you keep crying & reaching towards her with your little arms & someone drags you away from her. & they keep you hidden & alone & a stranger comes & builds an impenetrable prison around you so youre doomed to forever haunt these endless corridors & youve never known kindness or companionship or love. & when they call you a monster. well. you believe them

[orpheuslament]

babe you reblogged orpheuslament minotaur post 23 times are you okay

[staticorchid]

#mamaposting

[quinnception]

[largishcat]

you may have noticed that my blog is disorganized and thematically incoherent and my tag game is weaker by the day. this is commentary on the chaos of modern existence