feat. | just yoimiya
summary | yoimiya and new year's?
author's note: this was a wip from october 2023 that i wanted to post for the new year. i never got around to it because i moved and everything was so awful so fast. was going through my drafts and i realized i actually really liked this and thought you all should read it (if anyone reads anymore?) so.... happy super super delayed new year's i guess. i love you all.
naganohara yoimiya |
it's a new year, and you're supposed to be elated. the party's a hum around you, a chorus of people shouting happy new year! and balloons popping. you're standing on a clump of streamers, sad and entangled, like noodles. the skyline is brilliantly lit up with fireworks ahead of you, but your heart's not in the celebrations. the balcony door's open, cool air squeezing past you and lifting your hair off of your neck, and suddenly you're seized with the burning urge to leave this hot room, leave the sweaty bodies, the halfhearted new year's resolutions, the falsities of it all.
people grab your shoulders as you walk by, but you ignore them. "oh, yn," they shout, voices creeping in pitch as the hours tick later. "come join us!" plastic cups crunch under your feet as you walk, and you're filled with a revulsion, so strong and deep that you wonder if it was you who felt it or was it someone else?
you force your way out to the balcony and lean against the rail, resting your head in your arms. the wind is cool against your sweat-soaked scalp; it feels comforting. you squeeze your eyes shut and turn around, sliding down until you're resting your chin on your knees and watching the party through half-lidded eyes. fireworks snap loudly above you--the first time you heard them, really heard them, you were so startled you jumped--and you can see your friends' faces, beaming at you, beckoning you to come inside. you close your eyes and take a deep breath.
your mind whirrs with images. they're barely fleshed-out images, lacking depth and emotion. they're memories that you can hardly taste, let alone feel, and your heart cracks. if you open your eyes, you know, you'll lose them.
it's a new year, you think. let them go.
beside you, someone sits down. it's yoimiya; you know it from the soft grunt she makes as she lowers herself to the ground. you lift your head and wipe your face (you hadn't realized you'd started crying). "hi," you say, and your voice sounds weak even to yourself.
she just looks at you, then holds her arms open. you melt into her hug with a sob, burying your face into her shoulder. "oh, yoimiya," you sob. "i'm just-- i just-- i can't believe it's a new year...." you trail off, and she pets your hair, perhaps telling you silently that it's okay, you don't need to explain. her hands are so gentle, her touch so comforting, so akin to your mother, your father, your friends, it brings a fresh torrent of pain and you dissolve into tears again. maybe if it had been another time, you would've been embarrassed, maybe even refused her hug and gone to cry in the bathroom instead, but right now, just past midnight on january 1, you can't bring yourself to care.
eventually, your torrent of sobs turns into a mild trickle, and you pull away, your nose running and hair sticking up. "thanks," you croak, smiling at her. she smiles back. "it's okay, yn," she tells you gently, standing up. she offers you a hand. "if it isn't okay, i'm always here."
you take her hand and she hoists you up, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. "let's go inside, shall we?"
and so you do, back into the throng of people lit up in halos of pink and glitter, people overflowing with hope and excitement, and you take yoimiya's hands and then her shoulders and pull her close, pressing your face into her neck and inhaling, whispering, i love you thank you and the two of you sway side to side, the dawn of a new year settling on your shoulders in a blanket of cotton candy pink and orange, soft swirling pastels rising over the treetops. fireworks burst in the sky, you whoop with joy, and yoimiya laughs at you, openmouthed, as you spin her around and around and around, twirling on your tiptoes like a top.
Tried looking for amorisqasayid, and apparently, she deactivated her account :( i hope she's okay wherever she is.. do you, by any chance know why she chose to deactivated?
hi anon! i haven't been active on tumblr at all lately and i didn't notice she deactivated--but i hope she's okay and doing well. i don't know why she chose to deactivate, i'm sorry. if you do find out could you let me know?
feat. | diluc, yoimiya, eula, and xiao!
summary | getting back together after a breakup. you love each other.
author's note: it was very painful to write this very painful fic. enjoy! also idk if xiao actually smiles.. but i took a leap. and so now he smiles.
diluc ragnvindr |
maybe he hung around after to see if you still loved him. maybe he, despite your cutting words, still loved you. maybe he went to sleep thinking of your soft smile and gentle touch. and maybe, just maybe, he hoped you’d come back to him.
your breakup destroys diluc. he’s still in love, hanging on to his shredded memories of you. he longs to kiss you, hold you, be with you. and yet you’d left, weeks ago, months ago, how long was it? time blurs together when you’re not there, and he feels almost weightless.
ha! weightless. as though such a word could be used to describe a man whose heart had just been torn out of his chest and lain on the ground, bleeding raw and bare. he sometimes—no, always—thought about you, and was so out of it that he rarely bartended at the tavern anymore. he hid away in the dawn winery. he wants to see you—he wants you to love him again, love him like he loved (no, loves) you.
adelaide worries about his many weeks spent pining away in front of the fire, drinking tea and staring morosely into the flickering flames. he's always been broody, angsty, mopey, but after he met you, he perked up. he started growing flowers in little beds (after you nagging him) and he started wearing other clothes. honestly. he'd do anything to see you right now.
and his wish is granted one cold winter afternoon, when he opens the door to see you on the other side. his broken heart repairs itself at the sight of you, freezing, smiling apologetically at him. “i love you—“ the two of you start together, and he doesn’t even give you a pause before he pulls you into a kiss.
naganohara yoimiya |
she misses you with an ache so fierce her sunshine dims. her father comments on her dullness and she forces a laugh. she’s no longer chipper, no longer soft and sweet. instead, she’s hard edges and short tempers and quiet cries in the dark.
yoimiya thinks about you every day. while lighting a firework fuse. while staying up late at night. her thoughts are plagued by you and you only. she can’t bring herself to forget you, the magical person who dove in and made her feel truly, truly joyful. who made her feel like she wasn't too much.
she watches the fireworks on amakane island, remembering when you sat with her. and yet the thought stings so much, she bites her lip hard to keep from crying. what happened to her? she used to laugh everywhere she went, spreading light and warmth. you'd called her the sparkle of my eye. when she'd blushed and laughed, you had thrown your arms around her and kissed her full on the mouth.
now, she needs you. she needs you to bring back that light. that sparkle.
her chest aching, she leans forward and closes her eyes, her fingertips brushing a slip of paper. she raises it to her eyes. on it, four words are written in a scrawl she’s recognize anywhere.
i still love you.
she sniffles, the tears streaming freely down her face. when were you here last? to write her a note, but to not see you? could you be that selfish? why leave a note when you could see her in person? she tears up the note, her fingers shaking, anger seeping through the sadness. well, fine. if you didn't want to see her, so be it. she would raise her head and--
a shuffle behind her causes her head to snap up and glance behind her. it’s you, holding up a sheet of paper. she barely takes time to read it before throwing herself into your arms and sobbing into your shoulder. do you still love me?
“yes,” she whispers into your ear, her sobs hiccuping into laughter.
xiao |
xiao tells himself that he doesn’t hurt. he tells the same thing to anyone who asks; i’m fine. i’ve been over yn for so long now, it’s a thing of the past. he’ll force a laugh, but when he’s alone, sorrow drags his heart down so far it’s a wonder he manages to live still.
your leaving xiao tore him to shreds and pasted him together, some pieces missing and some in different spots. he wants to find you again. he wants you to call his name. often, he finds himself looking at the top of wangshu inn, searching for your silhouette, your voice, your words. your words were always so pretty. you had the loveliest way of describing the most trivial of things. the rain patters like my thoughts--always moving, always whirling, always there. but dissolving into the background sometimes, you'd written once. and then he'd known that he was deep in love.
maybe he’s too clingy. maybe all he deserves is this eternal suffering. karma, he thinks bitterly. he never deserved you. your sweet words, snarky wit and whip-fast intellect. your beautiful love.
whenever he started doubting himself like this, you’d sit on his lap and furiously tell him all the things you loved about him. by the end, he was smiling and you were laughing. you always said his smiles were as rare as a double rainbow; they were rarely there, but when they were, they took your breath away. his smile lopsided and crooked, his eye crinkling. it looked so out-of-place on his usually solemn features that you couldn't help but laugh, without fail.
thinking about that feels like a stab to the chest. he inhales painfully and turns away from the top of wangshu inn—but not before spotting a familiar silhouette.
he could recognize you from anywhere, and hoists himself easily onto the roof. you turn towards him. “xiao,” you whisper, and he smiles a double-rainbow smile.
eula lawrence |
eula pretends that she does not care. who cares if you've left her? the one true love of her life? better to be the one in power, she decides, and not to cry over you again. she throws herself into dancing more fervently than before, whispering to herself vengeance will be had for your breakup.
eula dances with a ferocity that sends everyone reeling into shock. is she... angry? people wonder. her anger plus her love for you plus her hurt turns her dances sharp like ice, dangerous like lightning. she's as graceful as a swan, light as a feather. she's quiet and angrier when she speaks and when people bring you up, she cuts them off with a dangerous look and a whispered threat of vengeance.
she remembers how you'd tell her how gorgeous she looked before the performance, and after, only compliments would spill from your mouth. she remembers blushing and smiling so hard her cheeks ached along with her feet, and she remembers you carrying her bridal-style to your bed. she remembers how you'd always make her tea and sit with her until she fell asleep.
thinking about such things, she scolds herself, is not right. she spins into a turn and for a second, thinks she can see your face in the crowd. but why would it be you? you left her after she broke up with you (maybe a valid reason, but does it matter? you left).
coming out of her turns, she spots you again. this time, there's no doubt. you smile at her and she rapidly ends her dance, rushing towards you. you race into her arms and she twirls the two of you around. "i love you so much," you whisper.
"i am so mad at you for leaving," she hisses. "but i love you too." and she yanks you back towards her.
Autumn This or That – sweater or hoodie? apple pie or pumpkin pie? haunted house or pumpkin patch? halloween or thanksgiving? candles or fairy lights? hot chocolate or eggnog? scary movies or scary stories? fuzzy socks or fuzzy blanket? library or cafe? orange or brown? anne with an e or gilmore girls? yellow leaves or brown leaves? cinnamon rolls or halloween cookies? gloomy days or rainy days? 🍂
sweater or hoodie // apple pie or pumpkin pie (neither) // haunted house or pumpkin patch // halloween or thanksgiving (not even a contest)// candles or fairy lights // hot chocolate or eggnog // scary movies or scary stories // fuzzy socks or fuzzy blanket (i can’t choose) // library or cafe // orange or brown // anne with an e or gilmore girls (i haven’t watched either of these shows) // yellow leaves or brown leaves // cinnamon rolls or halloween cookies // gloomy days or rainy days
tagging: @starrierknight-main, @trianglesimp, @monsterinmyboxers, @zekesznn, @onirique-amaranth, @godnectar, and anyone who wants to join!
sweater or hoodie // apple pie or pumpkin pie // haunted house or pumpkin patch // halloween or thanksgiving // candles or fairy lights // hot chocolate or eggnog // scary movies or scary stories // fuzzy socks or fuzzy blanket // library or cafe // orange or brown // anne with an e or gilmore girls // yellow leaves or brown leaves // cinnamon rolls or halloween cookies // gloomy days or rainy days
This looked fun, I need to relax a little after writing so much
sweater or hoodie // apple pie or pumpkin pie // haunted house or pumpkin patch // halloween or thanksgiving // candles or fairy lights // hot chocolate or eggnog // scary movies or scary stories // fuzzy socks or fuzzy blanket // library or cafe // orange or brown // anne with an e or gilmore girls // yellow leaves or brown leaves // cinnamon rolls or halloween cookies // gloomy days or rainy days
i love tag games so fuckin much im gonna boom myself
sweater or hoodie? apple pie or pumpkin pie? haunted house or pumpkin patch? halloween or thanksgiving? candles or fairy lights? hot chocolate or eggnog? scary movies or scary stories? fuzzy socks or fuzzy blanket? library or cafe? orange or brown? anne with an e or gilmore girls (i havent watched any so i cant really give my opinion)? yellow leaves or brown leaves? cinnamon rolls or halloween cookies? gloomy days or rainy days?
sweater or hoodie? apple pie or pumpkin pie? haunted house or pumpkin patch? halloween or thanksgiving? candles or fairy lights? hot chocolate or eggnog? scary movies or scary stories? fuzzy socks or fuzzy blanket? library or cafe? orange or brown? anne with an e or gilmore girls? yellow leaves or brown leaves? cinnamon rolls or halloween cookies? gloomy days or rainy days? 🍂
im a bit tired so im not tagging but anyone can join~!
sweater or hoodie? applie pie or pumpkin pie? haunted house or pumpkin patch? halloween or thanksgiving? candles or fairy lights? hot chocolate or eggnog? scary movies or scary stories? fuzzy socks or fuzzy blankets? library or cafe? orange or brown? anne with an e or gilmore girls? yellow leaves or brown leaves? cinnamon rolls or halloween cookies? gloomy days or rainy days?
hi jj! how are you doing? i hope ur okay :( i miss you and take care of yourself! please remember to drink water and feed urself and take breaks and such. love u always and always!!
Sunny, sweetheart! I'm so sorry for the late reply but I haven't been very active on tumblr recently, so I only saw your message now. I miss you too, and it's so sweet that you sent this. <3 Please take care of yourself too and remember, even though I'm not actively posting right now I'm still here if you need someone to vent to. :) Lots of love right back at you!
If you receive this, you make somebody happy! Go on anon and send this to ten of your followers who make you happy or somebody you think needs cheering up. If you get one back, even better 🤍!
this year, I'm going to do the opposite of NaNoWriMo: None-vember. it's where I don't write anything for a month because I'm actually very tired and I just want to nap
tagging : @favonius-captain @dawndelion-winery @heiayen @intothegenshinworld @kazumist @chichikoi @starglitterz @naraven @venusflwrs @kyokaede @rainstops @zhongrin @floraldresvi @starchivves @oveloof ( no pressure + anyo who sees this who wants to do it !!! )
reblog to share your results and tag your friends to do it too !!!
I love these games and I saw this and wanted to play!
Tags: @scara6 @hiraethsdesires @ciarchivez @serenitiiy @acourtofwhatthefuck @creepspastaarts @dreamofjoys @sh1-n0bu @ikimaru @rlvsmegumi @circusmantis (no pressure, only play if you want <333)
