I don't think I'll ever be over Defunctland's last name being Perjurer. Mind-bogglingly intense and thorough research, and this fucker's name is Person Who Makes Shit Up.
there's a pod somewhere constantly spawning bitches who looks exactly like this to say things like 'uguuuuuUuu heem heem i'm getting cancwelled... twitter is so mean and cancel culture is so craaazy now...uwaa,... but i know all my fans wuv me..,.' at a pitch that would break every window in the sistine chapel over dogshit phasmophobia footage
@crayonaird Request: Hiya! Could I request a romantic matchup for Twisted Wonderland?
I go by Ophelia, use she/her pronouns.
I'm 5'4, particularly curvy, and I've got shoulder-length pinkish hair that desperately needs redyed.
I'm a big fan of doing anything crafty or creative whether it's drawing, writing, sewing, crochet, etc. I'm also a fan of alternative fashion and have a very goofy and distinct style!
Personality-wise, I'd describe myself as Laid-back, loyal (to a fault), adventurous, deadpan (especially with humor), with no problem being bold if I feel comfortable. I can also be viciously stubborn, anxious, and I'm perpetually late (super efficient once I get there though!). I'm the kind of person who can fall asleep anywhere if I'm comfy! I've had many naps curled up in a corner on campus lol.
Thank you so much! I've been really enjoying your writing!
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After going through the information given, I believe that you best pair well with Floyd Leech!
You’re so short! And squishy! And your hair makes you look like a shrimp! Floyd was already going to call you a shrimp because there’s an inherent shrimpiness to you, but it seems like fate made it all the more possible! Can he pick you up in his arms and swing you around? Can he squeeze you? Oohhh! Can he help you re-dye your hair? (Maybe not too red, or else you’ll end up looking like a certain Goldfishie, hehehe).
After his initial observations of you (and threats to squeeze you as hard as possible because why not?) Floyd quickly loses interest. You’re a shrimp, so what? It’s not like he needs you hanging around him all the time and he doesn’t want to seek you out unless Azul or Jade ask him to. You’re just a shrimp and he has bigger fish to fry (hehehe). However, there is one thing that brings his eyes to you time and time again without fail.
It’s your fashion sense.
Under the sea, there isn’t a lot that you can do fashion-wise. Sure, there are merfolk who are wealthier than others and choose to adorn their fins and tails with jewelry, but actual clothing? Fabric gets caught in coral or rocks, it drags behind you in the current, and it’s not like fabric will last long in the briny depths. When Floyd breached the surface and saw humans for the first time, he was always so fascinated with how land walkers would express their personalities through what they wore! That was so cool and fascinating! Floyd wanted to do that too!
When he realizes that your sense of style isn’t just a one time thing, but something that you actively chose to wear because it suits your personality, Floyd is instantly hooked. You look so cool and interesting! Can you give Floyd some fashion tips? He could go into Pomefiore and ask around, but there’s that weird guy there with the hat thing and he’s kinda… He’s kinda weird and you’re not that weird so you’re gonna help him. Or else.
Just kidding! But please, help Floyd. If it helps, he has lots of fun and flashy clothing and is drawn to bright colors and obnoxious patterns (basically, anything that can give Azul a heart attack).
Whenever Floyd doesn’t want to go to class, he likes walking around campus and finding good places to hide or nap. If he ever sees you hanging out by yourself or napping, he’ll gladly join you! Prepare to be smooshed next to a gigantic eel merfolk because Floyd does not know the concept of personal space. If you ever feel uncomfortable, tell Floyd and he’ll back off. Eventually. It’ll take a few tries, but he’s a good boy at heart and really, he’s just in it to startle you and not to make you feel too threatened.
When Floyd truly gets to know you and appreciates you for who you are, he’ll start calling you by your actual name. Not a nickname, not a pet name. Your true name. There’s a vulnerability and respect heavy in his voice when he calls you by your actual name. It’s like admitting to himself and to the rest of the world that you are worthy of his time and that you gained both his respect and the privilege to be granted your humanity.
Don’t get too sappy or look heavily into it, okay? Poetry is more of Jade’s thing if he’s gonna be honest.
Please go on adventures with Floyd. He’s partial to parkour, but he’s up for anything that you might be into.
Floyd is also loyal and laid back—but there are times when he can be very intense. For some odd reason, the both of you balance each other out! Is that a cause for concern for others? Absolutely!
However, once Floyd realizes that he likes you—I mean, really likes you to the point where his heart starts pumping faster and his face feels oddly flushed—he freezes and doesn’t know what to do. He will never admit it, but as a moray eel, he can be cowardly. While he may appear to be a menace with no boundaries or self-preservation, he does know what his limits are. When he learns just how bold you are around him, he becomes almost threatened by you. He can barely say what he really wants to say, choosing only to convey his emotions through actions, and you’re just being your true self without any inhibitions? If only he were like you!
Luckily for him, if you’re truly that bold, you can ask him out first. He’ll pout and tell you that it should have been his job, but on the inside, he’s grateful.
It’s okay if you’re anxious! Floyd can relate to that sometimes. If you’re ever feeling like the world is getting too much, Floyd immediately takes notice. As much as other people would rather not admit it, Floyd can be quite perceptive at times. Because of this, he’ll be quick to give you a hug or whatever you need to help calm down. Sometimes, if you’re being quiet, but willing to have Floyd in your company, he will make you laugh and smile when he says the most outlandish of things. “Why do you land walkers use dinglehoppers to eat food? That doesn’t make sense!”
(When he figures that you’re finally feeling okay, he’ll take that as his cue to draw you up into a tight hug before launching you into the air so that you could land in his arms. It doesn’t matter if you complain, he will show his affection to his little Shrimpy!)
I hope you realize this, but being with Floyd is like going on a roller coaster ride. There are ups and downs, lulls and pauses in between, and drops that knock the breath out of you. Sometimes, the both of you will fight and other times you’ll make up, but at the end of the day, you can’t deny that the time you spent together was interesting and memorable.
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If you want to donate a Ko-Fi, feel free https://ko-fi.com/devintrinidad.
this is so embarrassing. i want to love & be loved & drink really nice tea & eat really nice pasta & not feel like the loneliness is a part of me anymore. i want a herb garden
It's super difficult sometimes to remember that others not being in daily contact isn't a reflection of me or our friendship. It's silly and a bit unfortunate reminding myself of that, but I've got really good friends now and we're all busy motherfuckers
It's weird navigating friendships outside of high school where you were forced to see the same people everyday for years! It skews your perception on what friendship is really like on a day to day basis after you graduate
#I’m so sorry but it’s risotto and it does have chopped onion#in my defense I keep a giant bag of pre-chopped onions in thw freezer
YOUR LAZY MEAL IS RISOTTO?? WHAT’S YOUR LAZY DESSERT, A FUCKING SOUFFLE? IS YOUR GO-TO QUICK READ WAITING FOR THE BUS THE FUCKING POETIC EDDA IN ITS ORIGINAL OLD NORSE?
transgender genocide in the usa , the right to abortion has been revoked, cops dont have to read miranda rights anymore, border patrol can search your premises without a warrant, access to contraceptives & legalization of gay marriage & right to privacy in the bedroom are being re-examined, militia is guarding our supreme court made up of unelected officials who can only be removed from office by death or retirement. tell me where, is our freedom?
too much “this character did something bad” talking about fictional characters like they’re autonomous entities and not enough “why have the writers made this character do the bad thing and how does it contribute to the overall plot and themes?”
we’re also absolutely barren of “does this bad thing the character did form a pattern in the story that could indicate the writers’ beliefs and/or ideologies?”
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