Follow your bliss.
Pursue your passion.
Do what you love.
Right?
Easy right? I mean, I must subscribe to these ideas to some degreeā¦ I have made this sentiment into artwork which features on two t-shirts, a poster and a calendar!
And, to a pointā¦ I do believe this, butā¦
I also believe itās an incredibly incomplete tip; a part of a larger truth (that maybe doesnāt fit onto a mug).
For instance do what you love is great if you know what you love to do.
Follow your bliss sounds delightful, but something tells me itās the mantra of those contestants from those singing competition shows, you know the ones, they sound like cats with laryngitis screeching out a Ricky Martin song. I can hear them now:
āIāve given everything to this, It means everything to me, I donāt know how to do anything else! This is my passion!!ā
As crazy as they sound, in many ways, following my passion did pay off for meā¦
Iāve given this conundrum so much thought, itās ridiculous.
Although, I am extremely prone to being an āoverthinkerā, I feel Iāve made some headway on how to enhance this advice, to a place where it actually solves problems.
Whether you are stuck in a job, not doing creative work of any kindā¦
stuck doing creative work you donāt want to be doingā¦
or you feel like youāve hit a ceiling in a creative pursuit that used to feel fulfillingā¦
I think itās time to find your Pencil in the Stone.
Youāve Got to Want Something
āThere is one quality which one must possess to win, and that is definiteness of purpose, the knowledge of what one wants, and a burning desire to possess it.ā
This post could be titled āConfession: I freaking love Harry Potterā.
Growing up I read 4 of the books, then went to high school and decided that it wasnāt going to help me advance my pursuit of being a ladies man (news flash: I didnāt succeed in that pursuit even though I quit reading harry potter books, lesson? NEVER STOP READING HP).
A few years back my wife and I binged watched all the HP movies while on Christmas holiday.
It was then, that my true crazy fandom was birthed. After the last film I was so shaken upā¦ there was a hole in my soul, the story was overā¦ :(
I laid in bed, and as silly as it sounds, I couldnāt help thinking: why the heck do a I like this so much!?!?
I started to research this āhero storyā.
You know: Luke Skywalker, Neoā¦ Jesus!
These stories have always deeply resonated with meā¦ and I wanted to know why!
Joseph Campbell and Carl Jung have a lot to say on the subject, if you want to read more about it, I suggest checking out their work on the topic.
After much thought and research, hereās my (possibly less profound than Campbellās or Jungās) conclusion, Mariah Carey was right: a hero lies in you.
Alright, Iām kidding about the Mariah Carey part, but seriously, I believe these stories cut us to our core, change our cultural landscapes, and ultimately change our lives because they speak to something innate about what it means to be human.
Carl Jung calls it the āHero Archetypeā. He says itās lodged in the part of our brain that we all have in common, the collective unconscious.
I believe itās more than that. I believe our lives are all hero stories waiting to be told.
Sounds great, who doesnāt want to be a hero?
āLook around Andy, I donāt see many 'hereosāā you may say.
I believe thatās because we donāt know what we are supposed to be doing.
Forces of evil (aka facebook) keep us distracted and confused.
I believe we donāt know which path to take, we donāt know what it is we want.
So we go nowhere. We stay put.
Every hero journey starts the same way: the hero wants somethingā¦something very specific.
Neo wants to free the minds of the world from the agents.
Luke wants to defeat the Empire.
Harry Potter wants to stop Voldemort.
Andy wants to invent a 0 calorie pepperoni and goat cheese pizzaā¦ (you canāt always get what you want).
But what do you do if you canāt figure out which path to give your everything to?
Without this burning solitary desire, you will not accomplish anything worthwhile.
Every hero has a blinding white hot passion for one narrow desire. The goal that only they can accomplishā¦
All you need to do is find yours.
Like King Arthur and his sword, where is the pencil that only you can pull from the stone? What is the creative work that only you can do?
Sounds magical, right? A little too magical maybe??? I agreeā¦ letās stick a pin in that thought, Iāll explain further down, for now let me just tell you a secret: Iām kind of a fool.
Before you allow me to be your Morpheus, I should let you know: Iām kind of an idiot.
Sometimes I think even the king of the idiots (George Costanza) has got nothing on me, baby.
For instance a few years back I had this āamazingā idea.
I was living in England at the time, in the countryside of Yorkshire. Beautiful landscape, giant rolling hills covered in green grass, pastures segregated by stone fences. Old churches and houses lining winding roads, dictated by the topography of the land.
In this time in my life I had become a ājoggerā. Jogging is where you just run for an extended period of time.
On one occasion, right as I started my jogging routine, miles away in the distance, beyond giant hills and several towns, I could see a giant tower. It wasnāt a special tower. I mean it didnāt have a giant eye at the top or anything, just a standard radio tower.
That sweet mug in the photo is by my friend Jason Sturgill btw. Buy it here.
This is where I had my brilliant idea: Iām going to run to that tower.
And I did, and it was gloriousā¦
All along the way I continued to shoot for the tower. If I took a wrong turn, or I hit a dead end, I would look up where the tower was in relation to myself, and readjust.
I didnāt have a map. I didnāt need one.
With this giant marker in the distance, this clear desire, it was incredibly easy to find my destination, even with minor setbacks and wrong turns.
The pencil in the stone is your marker. Your one desire, your tower in the distance.
If you think I am overstating this, letās get back to me being an idiot:
My plan on finding the tower was flawless, but you may see where Iām going with this, and in the words of the comedian Mike Birbiglia, I see where itās going too, because Iām in the future also.
I didnāt have a plan for getting back to my house.
My house was now just a vague blip on the horizon in the opposite direction.
I didnāt have a phone.I didnāt know even one phone number by memory.
I didnāt inform anyone that I would be running to this tower.
And it took me so long to get to the tower, it was now nightfall.
Like I said, Iām an idiot.
When your goals and creative pursuits are a vague blip on the horizon, you are in trouble.
Back to all this feeling a bit like silly warm fuzzy magic.
On the logic v.s. magic spectrum. I definitely fall into the āmagic sideā of thinking.
I love the invisible, the spiritual, the imaginaryā¦ but it has got me into trouble more than once (did I tell you about the time I randomly ran to a tower?)
Follow your bliss is all well and good, but itās a bit too fuzzy.
Following your bliss too far and you might end up in a back alley in North Dakota, trading your 401k for a handful of magic beans from a guy name Skippy LaRoux.
Like I said, Iāve fallen for the magic too many times. I have enough magic beans to make one of those overstuffed Chipotle burritos. Mmm Chipolte is kind of magicā¦
Iām not the only one who has seen the flaws in this ideology. Many of us are so fed up with it that if one more person says ādo what you loveā weāre gonna slap them.
Before we burn ādo what you loveā at the stake along with all the other magical mumbo jumbo, letās remember the words of Martin Luther
āHuman reason is like a drunken man on horseback; set it up on one side, and it tumbles over on the other.ā
When we fall off one side of the horse, we shouldnāt get back up with such gusto that we fall off the other side.
Maybe we donāt need to throw out the magic of life, just need to balance it a bit.
What if there is a way to take this magic and balance it with logic? What if we donāt have to choose one or the other?
The Sweet Spot just got Sweeter
I know, that title sounds like a Mcdonaldās tagline for an ad for extra sweet tea, but stick with me.
The idea that your sweet spot, your path, can be found at the center point of your passions, skill and a demand in the market is not a new idea.
Itās actually an amazing idea that has been passed around by great minds for some time now.
I love the idea, but Iāve always had a sense that it was missing something.
It leaned a little too far over into the logic category for me. It missed that mysterious force in life that canāt be explained, and shouldnāt be ignored.
This bugged me. I started to think hard about how to balance this equation.
We know that being lead by money or marketing completely, will not lead you where you need to go, but ignoring it is a bad idea too.
Then it hit me, the balance to the demand in the market, to looking outside yourself, is looking inside yourself. Itās listening to your gut, itās hearing your calling.
To make this as simple as possible, I developed a rudimentary tool / system.
My guess is that itās not that you canāt think of one desire to pursue, my guess is that you donāt know which to give your everything to.
Any goal worth giving your life to needs to be very significant, and any truly significant goal requires giving it your all.
List out the top 5 - 10 choices, then on a scale from logic to magic, grade these choices, by just applying values that come from your gut.
Grade them with these scales, Skills v.s. Passion and Demand v.s. Calling.
This is how the scale works:
Skill 5-4-3-2-1-0-1-2-3-4-5 Passion
0 being something you are equally skilled and passionate about. A 5 on the left hand side is something you are very skilled at, but not very passionate about.
Do this for the Demand v.s. Calling.
A 5 on the Demand side is something where there is a giant gap in the market, but you donāt feel called at all to it.
Hereās where it gets juicy. The pencil in the stone CHART!
Plot your points. I scored a 1 towards Passion in Kids Books, and a 1 towards Calling. So I plot that 1,1 in the Calling / Passion quadrant.
Editorial Illustration is a 2 towards Passion, 2 towards Demand. I plot 2,2 in the Demand / Passion quadrant.
Now weāve taken all the logic / magic out of your swirling mind, and down to paper.
The thing or few things that land closest to your center point, or your inner circle of higher truthā¢ ; ) is your Pencil in the Stone. This is your path.
Take that, Magic! (as in: Eat that, Magic! or In Your Face, Magic! Magic hates to be pinned down to paper like a math problem!)
Pencil in the Stone Cheatsheet:
Skills - Either your natural talents or things that youāve learned. These are undeniable things that you possess, that put you ahead of others in some way.
Passion - These are your interests, the things that you can not get enough of. When you are spending time in this area, you lose track of time, you feel euphoria.
Demand - Basically you are looking for areas where there are industries and markets. Directions in which there are actual existing careers that have real career paths.
Calling - This is that thing in your gut that says āI was born to do this thingā. Your calling is your āwhyā, itās always benefits others, itās selfless and true.
I didnāt always have this tool, but looking back Iāve realized that my best pursuits have resulted from this thinking. Some amazing things have come from it in my life. Although I still have miles to go to succeed in my biggest desires, this thinking has dramatically helped me sort through all the confusion, gain clarity, and achieve my goals.
I used to be massively jealous of Neo, Harry Potter & the other 'chosen onesā.
I mean they had a prophecy! Everyone believed in them! It was foretold that they would succeed!
Iāve often struggled to stay motivated on my path, worrying that I wasnāt cut out for the job.
Damn you Harry Potter! You had it so easy!
Then I realized, we are all in the same boat.
Ok, I may not be the āchosen oneā, but we share the same struggle.
The one thing that caused Luke, Neo and Harry to stumble was this: failing to believe in themselves.
It doesnāt matter if everyone else believes, if you donāt believe youāre the one.
It doesnāt matter if everyone believes you will succeed, if you donāt believe it.
As Zig Ziglar says, the kid who doesnāt believe he can pass the test, doesnāt study.
Trust Mariah, a hero really does lie in you.
I believe if youāre still on this earth, you have a mission, and you have everything inside of you that you need to fulfill this mission.
Donāt) Just Keep Swimming
If youāre heading the wrong way, but you just keep at it, stick-to-it-iveness / true grit isnāt helping you, itās itās hurting you! Youāre not making progress, youāre regressing.
If youāre on the wrong path, Doryās advice is only going to make things worse.
Sometimes I think this truth is what keeps us heading in the wrong direction.
Iāve gone too far to turn back now!
Luckily I believe the universe is like my dad. Let me explain.
So there I was, at dusk, standing at the foot of this radio tower.
Cool tower, now what? Oh crapā¦ I thought to myself.
I decided to try to retrace my path to find my way home.
Iāll tell you a secret about old houses, rolling hills and stone fences: they all look exactly the same.
But, I just kept swimming.
I had blisters, it was raining (no duh, itās England), it was the dead of night, I was now on an unlit backroad that had initially looked familiar, but I now knew I had never seen it before.
I should have given up earlier, when there were still houses around. I could have knocked on a door.
But it had been too daunting. What was I going to say?
āHi I live in Thurstonland, I donāt know where that is, in relation to here, and I donāt have any phone numbers, so you will have to drive me there.ā
Imagine if a foreign man drenched in rain and sweat, in a cut off shirt and shorts showed up on your doorstep with this request.
I didnāt want to deal with the shame.
Admitting you donāt know where you are going is very very hard.
There I was in the pitch black, walking for miles, with no plan, no clue.
A car passed by, which gave me an idea! I could wave down a car!
Damn it, I wish Iād had thought of this before that one car passed by! I thought.
I kept walking. I was actually really scared at this point, to be perfectly honest, I was panicking.
Then, up on the horizon I could see a new set of lights. I started to act like a mad man, trying to wave the car to the side of the road, in hindsight I realize acting like a crazy person on a side road in the dead of night is not the best way to get someone to help you, butā¦ it worked!
He wouldnāt let me in the car (smart dude), but he did let me use his phone.
I didnāt know any numbersā¦ but I decided to take a leap of faith.
I dug into my subconscious. Plucked the only phone number I could cobble together. Dialed.
I got lucky: my dad answered.
You see, I expected my dad to say āWhat were you thinking! You could have been killed! Whatās wrong with!ā
Not because I have a bad dad, but because that would have been the rational response to this silly adventure.
He didnāt say that. He was nearly in tears, he had called the police. He was desperately worried.
The man pointed me in the direction of a local pub, my dad drove there.
As silly as it sounds, even with all the blisters and my aching legs, I ran to my dad, and he ran to me. We were both crying. Maybe there wasnāt any real danger, but in the moment it felt very epic.
I have good news. I believe the universe is like my dad.
We think when weāve gone the wrong way, and we give up and turn around we have to travel this giant distance back to the start, walking in shame all the while, but I believe if you take that leap of faith, and you turn around, the universe will use all that you learned on the wrong path, and give you a head start on the true path.
When you start on the true path, youāll actually do better having gone the wrong way, then having started on the right path from the beginning.
So hereās my challenge: turn around.
Go find your Pencil in the Stone.
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