waving through a window

Matt Murdock || 17 || Human/Hunter || We start with stars in our eyes, we start believing that we belong. But every sun doesn't rise. And no one tells you where you went wrong.

[crestfallenmurdock]

novakxclaire :

“I’m not really sure you have any room to talk, but it probably doesn’t help my case to mention that this is only my first coffee of the day. I’ll need at least one more of these before I’m fully functional. Anyways, I know Freddie isn’t real, which is what makes this crazy. It had to be some mass hallucination, because I wasn’t the only one who saw him- among other fictional mass murderers. Honestly, I’d feel more comforted if it was a Wendigo.”

“What’s that supposed to mean? I mean, it would, but you plan on drinking at least one more, so. I think it might cancel out? Oh--you mean the party thing. Yeah, that was crazy. I guess it was too much to hope that we might be done with magic hijacking town events after the carnival. Maybe they should take a break planning anything else for a while. Really? They’re kind of....” There weren’t words to describe Wendigo’s, really. “At least you can kinda predict how the fictional murderers are going to act.”

[crestfallenmurdock]

steele-yourself :

Asher shrugged, like whatever made up scene they were talking about was ultimately no big deal. “That’s because I’m too smart to get tied up with vampires.” Except Matt was getting a little sentimental and… It was getting increasingly harder and harder not to read his mind. How long had he gone? Sure, sometimes it just happened (he blamed his 10th grade self for spending far too much time in that headspace), but he hadn’t intentionally read Matt’s mind since he came back. He was trying to be respectful. “I’ll try, just so you can avoid that paperwork.” It was a little coy shot at the other, but it was playful. It was weird (but kind of nice) being playful with Matt. “Getting soft on me already, huh?” He wasn’t going to push any of Matt’s buttons, he wasn’t going to push any of Matt’s buttons- he had already said he’d give Matt some time to think- He wasn’t going to push any of Matt’s buttons. “Maybe this crush thing has been the other way around this entire time.” Okay, maybe he was. “You’re definitely rebelling. Fortunately for you I just think it’s that awkward teenage rebelling that every kid goes through.” That was a lie, but it was times like this that Asher was grateful nobody else could read his mind. “You’d probably know better than I do. But going all out would probably be a mixture of a couple things. Stupid matching tuxedos, a limousine, dancing at least more than once– even if your dancing is sucky. And-” Ho, don’t do it. “It’ll end with us sneaking off to some one night motel where we’ll dot dot dot. Which is the only reason why I won’t ditch you halfway through, because I know you’ll eventually do the Running Man with Peter and ugh, no thank you.” There, that should cover that up pretty smoothly. “Then I’ll ask… The Winchester’s. I’m sure I could get an in with them, pretty easily. But since you’re insisting, maybe I’ll have to go this sexy cat route.” This was one of those times, when he didn’t even have to try to read Matt’s thoughts to catch little tidbits. He wasn’t planning on actually dressing up? “What, are you lame enough to do Spiderman? I bet you are, aren’t you.” Why didn’t Matt want to dress up?

Asher was a lot of things, but too smart to get tied up with vampires? Definitely not. Matt was honestly surprised the other boy hadn’t gotten involved with more shady stuff, knowing the way he ran his mouth. “Whatever you say.” They both knew he didn’t believe that one bit. “Good. That’s very selfless of you.” Part of him wanted to be uncomfortable about Asher’s clear push for more (contact, time spent together, banter, even), but another part of him warred back, almost enjoying the change. How strange. “I’m not going soft just because I don’t want to have a bad-boy stamp card, I--” He flushed, and willed himself not to start stammering again, ignoring Asher’s comment. “--Um, I-I’m okay not having street cred, or whatever it is you care so much about.” Asher knew what he was doing here--how could he not, after years of learning the ins and outs of making Matt uncomfortable?--and as much as Matt wanted to make some witty comment right back, he just kept getting caught off guard. He scoffed. “I’m not--No, I’m not rebelling. I’m just being normal.” Like he even remembered where normal began any more. “Matching tuxedos and limousines? I think you and I remember school dances very differently. It’s not usually that....glamorous. At least I don’t think the cha-cha slide is a fun way to start off the night.” If Matt had been drinking something, he would have spit it out in one of those cliche sitcom-y spit-takes. He gaped at Asher for a minute, grasping at whatever remained of his vocabulary for something--anything--to say here. “I--okay, um....You-you can’t say stuff like that.” He wheezed. “There are....” What, lines? Boundaries? They’d already proven pretty bad at establishing those, and Asher was just being himself...There wasn’t much Matt could argue. For the sake of his pride (and the airway he was positive he’d bruised sucking in air as fast as he did), he had to try. “You just can’t say that kind of stuff, okay? Yeah, um, sure. You do that.” He agreed, brain catching up to what Asher had said a moment later. “Wait, don’t bother them. They’re really busy, and important, and stuff, they don’t need people distracting them.” He sighed, glad all the indignation had already been startled out of him. “I’m not insisting, but...fine. Be a sexy cat if you want to be. Um, yeah. I’ve already got my costume and everything.” He lied, eager for Asher to let it go. There was just no point dressing up, not that he wanted to try explaining that to Asher.

[crestfallenmurdock]

steele-yourself :

the-star-fairy:

stella tilted her head and gave him a small smile. she was still confused about how much asher liked matt or if the feelings were mutual but it gave her a headache to think about it too much. “i like his nerdyness,” she commented with a nod. she heard someone walking towards them and turned her head. she bit her lip. she wasn’t sure if she was really ready to be around them at the same time but she would try not to let either of them know that. she gave matt a small smile, though her usual sunshine was dimmer than normal. “hi,” she said awkwardly, blushing a little. 

@steele-yourself

‘Of course you do,’ he wanted to say, but instead he found himself following her gaze as Matt walked over to them. It was inevitable, he should have figured. Not only had he been staring completely unsubtly, but if Matt saw these two talking, of course he’d come over. His eyes moved from Matt to Stella and god, if that didn’t hit him in a spot he didn’t think it would. Was he jealous over this girl? “You,” he said, before he could stop himself. “Mostly about how big of a nerd you are, but,” He shrugged, painfully aware that he was mostly filling the silence. “Hey.” He offered Matt a half-hearted wave, letting the rest of his fake insults die before they could even leave his lips.

@crestfallenmurdock​

“Hi,” He repeated back, glad she seemed mostly normal, at least. It wasn’t really surprising, she had been trying her hardest to be normal for him for months. But then Asher had to ruin it by claiming they’d been talking about him, and while that had been what he was subtly trying to figure out, Asher didn’t have to say it like that. “Okay, haha, I get it. None of my business. I just...You two don’t--y’know--really seem like you’d have anything to talk about, I guess.”

@the-star-fairy

[crestfallenmurdock]

steele-yourself :

the-star-fairy:

she didn’t know why she was pushing this. the more she pushed, then the admittance of him liking and possibly being with matt was more likely. but maybe that was what she wanted in some strange way. if he admitted it, then maybe everything wouldn’t be so unknown. that was what she hated most. not knowing where everyone stood with everyone else. she followed his gaze back over to matt and swallowed thickly. she frowned at his response. she didn’t quite understand that. “oh,” she said simply, still a bit confused about everything. “but doesn’t that mean you like him?” 

“That means-” Well, there was no use denying it now. It seemed like he had at least deflected enough for her to only see it as a friendship kind of liking, not whatever stupid pining shit it really was, but could he really deny that he was at least friends with Matt? With how often they had actual civil conversations, it was actually pretty stupid for him to deny it. “Yeah, you got me there. He’s not as bad as he used to be. Still a raging nerd, but hey, we all have flaws.”

Matt had been sitting on his own, eyes fixed to the comic in his hands, but mind elsewhere. Things in town weren’t getting easier (even saying they were getting harder might be an understatement), and he was stressed. A default mode for him, yes, but the level kicked up nearly 200% when he looked up and saw Stella talking to Asher. That couldn’t be a good thing, right? He knew Asher wouldn’t be mean to Stella, and Stella was hard not to like, so there was no danger of anyone getting hurt. But for some reason, he was still worried about them talking to each other....His feet started moving without asking his brain for permission, stopping him right in front of them with an awkward wave. “Uh, hey guys. What are you--I mean, what are you guys talking about?”

@the-star-fairy

[crestfallenmurdock]

steele-yourself :

“Just because you come barging in like whatever superhero you’re currently obsessed with, doesn’t mean I couldn’t have handled it. You act like that was my first experience being nearly killed by a vampire.” He definitely couldn’t have handled it, especially with Peter running and screaming like an idiotic maniac, but again, admitting any kind of gratitude to Matt right now was entirely unlikely. He snorted, rolling his eyes. The one perk of being himself was that when he was embarrassed, Asher covered it up with carefully placed insults and nonchalance. When Matt was embarrassed, he could hardly get a sentence out. “So you’ll go for me, but not anyone else?” He hadn’t meant to ask that out loud, just like he hadn’t meant to sound so pleased about it. “It’s a good thing I did ask, then. I’d hate to see you break some poor girl’s heart just because you’re so close to getting all the stamps on your bad boy card.” There, that should cover it up. “A pity yes.” He repeated it like he couldn’t quite believe it, though he was a tad impressed at the attempt at deflection. “Does that mean you’re gonna go all out, because you pity me? Don’t worry, I’ll buy the corsage, since I did ask, but only out of pity.” They had stopped walking, mostly out of Matt’s shock, but Asher started up again. They were close enough to his place and even though the conversation had gotten a little out of hand, Matt had definitely promised him maybe poisoned tacos. “You should know me better than that. One way or another I was gonna insult your dancing and leave. You should be happier that it happened at the beginning of the night.” It hadn’t helped that Stacy Rotlen was staring at Matt like she wanted to join him and his dancing, but that didn’t need to be talked about. “I’m pretty sure I could google the thing and find something that it resembled. Though- If you wanted me to dress up as a sexy cat, all you had to do was ask.” He paused. “Let me guess, you’re going the superhero route?”

Matt frowned. “I’m mostly positive you’ve never been nearly killed by a vampire before.” He wasn’t sure why the idea bothered him so much, but he’d felt the same way when Asher joked about having a werewolf living in his apartment complex. “I might not be there next time, so try not to do it again, if you can help it.” He tugged at his sleeve a little, feeling uncomfortable. Again. “There’s a lot of, um, paperwork involved, you know? So just don’t get messed up in that.” Not that there weren’t other hunters who could deal with the clean up, and most of the town seemed to be in the know these days, so there wouldn’t be much of a cover-up. But maybe Matt was overthinking it, he was pretty good at that. Asher should just...not die. Yeah, they could agree on that. “What? No, I didn’t mean it like...” Except maybe he kind of did, because he’d already said he wasn’t going to go, and then he’d changed that when Asher asked. How else was the other boy supposed to take it? “Okay, I guess it did kinda sound like that. Would you stop it with the bad boy card? I’m not trying to be a rebel.” He’d found that he minded less and less, though, his complaint more out of a sense of obligation to argue it than anything else. “What would going all out even look like for us?” Aware of how that sounded, he pressed on hastily, cheeks tinged red. “I mean, you know, we started this with a surprise ask while walking through town, you can’t really go more underkill than that.” It took him a moment to move his feet again, lagging behind Asher for a moment. “Is that what you’re going to do this year?” It wasn’t real concern he was feeling, it wasn’t. He didn’t want to be ditched halfway through to spend the rest of the night on his own. That was understandable. “Right, but then you wouldn’t be a Wendigo. You’d be a google image version of some drawing someone did that’s mostly werewolf with a little of the monster from Stranger Things thrown in. What--I--no...I wasn’t--No. I-I didn’t mean it like that.” Somehow Asher always managed to get him stammering over one thing or another. “Well--yeah. But you don’t have to say anything. I know what you think about it.”

[crestfallenmurdock]

steele-yourself :

Asher scoffed, shoving at Matt’s arm in a way that was absolutely not supposed to be flirty. “Shut up, Murdock.” He was almost definitely going to get an aneurism from how often he rolled his eyes, but if that was really how God wanted him to go, he wasn’t going to stop now. “I’ll keep that in mind if I ever find myself on the bad side of a psychotic monster.” But if he was being honest, he’d just rather that never happened. Not only would it be painfully inconvenient, but being saved by Matt again would ruin his cred. Or maybe it should happen, so he could die quickly. Watching Matt gape, seeing him stare at Asher like that– he’d much rather something swallow him whole right there. “You don’t have to sound so pleased about it. We all know that you’re too cool for prom. Anyways, it’s not like I’m asking because I want to. This is definitely a pity ask, because who else is going to ask you?” There was probably some clever trick that Asher could use to stop putting his foot in his mouth, namely shutting up, but old habits die hard and Matt was being ridiculously innocent. “This is as good of a promposal that anyone is ever gonna get from me.” Which wasn’t even a lie. He never planned on doing anything like this, ever again. “Pretty sure my words were sucky, but hey, that’s a valid reason.” Not really. Matt was the one who took dance classes. “Wendigo it is, then.”

“Again, you mean.” Matt pointed out, trying not to think about how far they’d come to get to a point where he felt comfortable almost teasing Asher back. It wasn’t a feeling that lasted long, however, as Asher fell back into his typical defensive behaviors, and Matt was left to try sorting through the words looking for the real meanings. For a guy who knew what everybody else was thinking all the time, Asher seemed ridiculously out of touch with his own thoughts. “I wasn’t--I’m not...” He stopped and started over. “I don’t care if anyone else asks me, because I wasn’t planning on going.” And maybe there was something a little flattering about Asher asking him, even if he wasn’t sure how he felt about the guy yet. Matt would never admit that, though, at risk of being teased until the day he died. He tried to sound flippant to hide the way he absolutely did not know how to react here. “Well, um, what if I’m giving you a pity yes? So you don’t have to do this again to someone else?” He didn’t pull the deflection off as well as Asher did, but he was pretty happy with the result. “That’s so not a valid reason. There were--what? Five hundred kids in the gym? You could have just stood near someone else.” It was still weird, them being able to talk about the old days (or just the fact that they were talking at all), but Matt didn’t totally hate it. He could look back on some of those interactions with a greater understanding now. “You still don’t even know what a Wendigo looks like, how are you going to make the costume?” But logic was useless, this was Asher. “Most people just go as superheroes or sexy cats.”

[novakxclaire]

“Are we all going to ignore the fact that this town is getting crazier and crazier? Because I’m pretty sure Freddie Krueger tried to break into my home a couple nights ago and the coffee girl finally just remembered the order that I get every day.”

[crestfallenmurdock]

“Ignoring the coffee thing--and um, are you sure that’s a healthy amount of coffee to be drinking?--you do know Freddie Krueger isn’t real, right? I mean, of course you do, you’re a hunter, but...You probably saw something like a Wendigo. Wait, you don’t think there’s a Wendigo here, do you?”

[thewintersoldiers-moved-blog]

hey, thanks for bailing on me.

[crestfallenmurdock]

“I almost didn’t come out tonight, but... this doesn’t seem so bad.”

[crestfallenmurdock]

dont-objectify-me:

“Right, yeah. Obviously.” Dean rolled his eyes, knowing he should probably just turn and walk away, but there he was moving towards him. With one hand resting on his shoulder, Dean caught his un-cast fist- with greater difficulty than he expected- and moved him back from the punching bag. “Seriously, kid. Chill for a sec, would you?”

Matt sucked in a breath, fighting every impulse to throw a punch at the guy that caught his fist and- He spun to look at him, his eyes widening almost instantly. “You- You’re- Holy shit, I- I’m sorry sir, I didn’t.... uhm, didn’t mean to be d-disrespectful or--” He cleared his throat and shook his head, trying not to stammer. “Sorry.”

[crestfallenmurdock]

ofalexanderiisms:

*· ☆,. Alexander arched an eyebrow. “You are Matt then, am I right or am I right?” he then asked befoire flashing the other a grin. “Peter is not here. Why do you think he would be?”

“Yeah, that’s me. I- He-He said I might be able to find him here.”

[crestfallenmurdock]

steele-yourself:

“When have I ever let anything go to my head, Murdock? I’m the most grounded guy you’ll ever meet.” He joked, steps slowing to match Matt’s pace. “Yeah? You mean if vampires try to eat me or something? I’m pretty sure I’ve filled my trouble quota for the next couple months, but I’ll keep you in mind if my life ever needs saving. So, thanks. Y’know.” It was kind of a big deal for Matt to offer protection services, since the guy was so shaky about hunting to begin with. Which Asher still didn’t get, because he totally kicked ass, but whatever. He totally wasn’t going to call Matt in the middle of the night with a fake emergency, but taking a moment to imagine the possibilities was fun. “I mean, I’m pretty good at taking stuff back. I feel like we could definitely go that direction.” But he had to give Matt a reason, something at least sort of real to explain the weirdness. Maybe something about a girl with a crush on him? No, that would just make things extra awkward. He opened his mouth to say something, hopefully something good, and blurted out–“Youshouldgotopromwithme.” Yeah, whatever he’d been hoping for, it definitely wasn’t that. “I mean, if you want to, obviously. And it can be as friends or whatever, just…” He gave a slightly bewildered shrug, not even sure why he was still talking. This was probably a violation of giving Matt space to think, as requested in the library, right? “You know, before you decide to ditch your senior prom, maybe consider me an option? Just so you don’t regret for the rest of your life when you’re fat and old and stuff.” Okay, now stop talking. “Yeah, well, you are kind of giving off asshole, too cool for lame school dances vibes. That’s definitely not my fault.” Asher wrinkled his nose. “Yeah, okay, never mind. That sounds awful. Hey, what about a Wendigo? I heard those were pretty badass.”

“Yeah, okay,” Matt said with a snort. They both knew that that was far from the truth, but Matt wasn’t gonna argue with it. His incredulous tone probably gave away what he really thought about it anyways. “Yeah. It’s just... yeah, if you ever find yourself in trouble. Vampires or whatever. You’ve got my number.” He shrugged, ready for that conversation to be done with. It was weird now, being more open to hunting. Weird mostly because it wasn’t ever something he thought he’d be actively doing, even before hell. “Uh, no, you can’t take it back, that’s not fair.” But it didn’t seem like Asher was going to, he just needed to wait. Though, not very long, apparently. It was spilling out of Asher’s mouth and Matt found himself gaping and speechless. “You, uh... You wanna go to prom with me?” There was shock in his voice and it took him a minute to realize how that might sound. “Sorry, I- It’s just... It’s still kinda hard to believe that you like me, yannow? It’s-” He cleared his throat, nodding a little awkwardly. “Sorry, yeah. I’ll go to prom with you. Even if that was the worst promposal in all of history.” And there was fondness, this time. Followed by another amused snort. “Really? Coming from the guy who left Junior Prom because- and, your words here- you didn’t want to see my stinky dancing.” He shook his head. “Wendigo is fine. Still pretty gross, but a badass gross, so that’s fine.”

[crestfallenmurdock]

steele-yourself:

humanpeter :

“What–is Matt alright then?” That was Peter’s first concern. “Wait, how do you even know that? I’m missing so much here.” Something big was going on that he didn’t know about. He just wished it was easier to understand. Peter looked reluctant to believe Matt’s words but nonetheless kept his mouth shut. “Me? Dude, you’re the one who just slayed a vampire-at least I think that was a vampire-and you also used a gun and were all badass-and I didn’t know vampires were real and okay I’m a little wow’d.”

@steele-yourself​

“I don’t–I don’t know! He knows what he’s doing, just shut up.” Things would probably be moving a lot faster if Peter could just learn to keep his mouth shut. There were times when words were good, and times when they weren’t. This was one of the times when anything Peter could possibly say would be unhelpful. “Don’t–Stop asking questions?? Can you do that for a couple minutes?” Maybe it was best if Asher himself just shut up and stepped back to let Matt explain vampires and the supernatural to his best friend. Although Matt had just saved his ass, so maybe he owed him one. “Vampires aren’t real. That guy….was on crack.”

@crestfallenmurdock

Matt was fine, Matt would always be fine when it came to hunting. (Okay, maybe not always, but that was his prerogative. He was the one who decided to pick it up again, after all.) But that didn’t matter. What mattered was that these two were safe and... judging by their back and forth (a confused rambling on Peter’s behalf, followed by irritation and a shoddy attempt at a cover up on Asher’s) they were both fine. “There’s a lot you don’t know, but-” He sighed. “Yeah, he was a vampire. Creatures like him, they exist. People like me? We hunt them. Make it safer for everyone else.”

@humanpeter​

[crestfallenmurdock]

With there being a new event and me being on such a long hiatus (and potentially being gone a couple days longer, after tonight) I’m considering dropping most of my threads and starting anew. Obviously I intend to keep plot relevant ones, but if you guys have any requests for threads for me to keep, let me know and I’ll do just that!

[crestfallenmurdock]

Matt Murdock as Spiderman

[marvls-deactivated20180324]

“i can do this.. i can do this.”

[crestfallenmurdock]

steele-yourself:

“Flattering.” He wasn’t going to say anything, because they were doing so well, not arguing or yelling, but he really was trying not to read Matt’s mind. It was kind of invasive, and Matt had a right to be jumpy about it, but it was kind of difficult. “Hey, he’s a nice werewolf, I’m sure. If there’s such thing. There’s just always weird noises coming from his apartment at night.” He was mostly joking, though knowing what he did about the high volume of supernatural creatures in town, there was a fifty-fifty chance it was true. “You know what? Nothing. It didn’t mean anything.” Yep, better to just push that crazy line of thought under the rug and back the fuck off. “Yeah, well, you never know. Sometimes people do stupid things for big events. Irrelevant cause you don’t care to involve yourself in lowly things like school dances? You’re too good for us, Murdock.” Asher shrugged. “I don’t know…I’m definitely considering it. Wait, what do they look like?”

“Yeah, whatever, don’t let it get to your head.” He shook his head, slowing his walk. “Well, nice werewolf or not, if... if you’re ever in trouble, you know you can call me, right?” Up until a few months ago, he hadn’t ever killed before, but he was different now. He’d kill a werewolf to protect someone that he cared about and though he might only admit it begrudgingly, he did care about Asher. “Anyways- No, you can’t do that. Don’t take it back, whatever you were gonna say, say it. Not all of us can read minds, here.” He was curious, but if Asher insisted he’d probably drop it. Maybe after pushing at least one more time, but... whatever. And then he found himself laughing- laughing so hard he had to actually stop walking completely. “Lowly things? You make me sound like such an asshole when you say it like that. I meant irrelevant because nobody’s gonna ask me, not- Ohmygod.” He shook his head, still laughing. “They look disgusting. Rotted teeth, wormy skin-- the works. Trust me, you don’t wanna dress up as them.”