celery stick

active may 2023 - 20 - she/her sw:156 cw:139 gw:121 ugw:105

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please tell me im not the only one who eats less when they don’t count calories😭bc when i count im like okay so i have this many left so it’s okay idk if that makes any sense but yeh

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didn’t do a food log yesterday bc i binged. i find it really difficult to restrict while im on my period:(

breakfast: energy bar & coffee w sugar 279

lunch: different energy bar 184

dinner: cheese toastie 339

total: 802

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posting old body checks as a reminder to myself that if i did it once before i can do it again

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food log

(im trying to reduce my calorie intake slowly because i only started restricting again recently)

breakfast: oats w sugar and milk + coffee 449

lunch: energy bar + coffee 260

dinner: 2 oranges + green tea 123

total: 832

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why do i think he’ll like me more if im 20 lbs lighter? well ik why it’s because i’ve been both overweight and skinny and i’ve seen how people’s behaviour changes when my weight changes. it’s sad but it’s true. people were nicer to me when i was skinny.

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im back yayyy but also kinda sad but i also missed tumblr lmao.

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tryna look like this again :’(

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i lost 8 kgs since coming off of sentraline tf?!? i went off of it bc im no longer living with my parents and they were the main reason why i was on antidepressants in the first place. and if u are on antidepressants and struggling w and ed for fuck sakes please don’t go off of your meds to lose weight!

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i might be relapsing. FUCK.

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how long does it take to get over seggsual trauma? i miss seggs. bruh i get horny but then when it comes to the act i feel disgusted. i feel so bad for my gf even though ik she understands. i hate being like this:( i almost convinced myself that im ace but realised that it’s just from being graped 2x within one yr. i get seggsually frustrated but i can’t resolve the frustration. i love this shit sm rly

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ngl im rly struggling not to relapse rn :) i made some changes to the meds i was taking and now all of the sudden i don’t have an appetite. seeing myself getting smaller is triggering something idk man. im not trying to lose weight but this makes me want to lose more and more.

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at this point im just triggering myself fml

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i can’t be the only edsheeran bitch who goes through a constant “uninstall, install” tumblr phase😭this ed never gonna leave me alone dammit

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Choke me

Sexually or to kill me either is fine

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so i’ve gained a bit of weight recently nd i started seeing this guy. keep in mind i only started seeing him after i gained weight. we decided to start an ab challenge. this man keeps doubting in me but little does he know what he’s dealing w… yes it is probably wrong of me ik