in which you and beomgyu go on a small vacation together. the problem? you two broke up before your 2-year anniversary. but it's okay, you two are just friends again, right?
pairing: beomgyu x fem!reader
genre: fluff, humor and an attempt at being angsty; only one bed trope; smau series
cw: guys honestly i don't even know anymore pls bare with me ok; swearing? Not much, I just wanted to write again.
an: It's been a while with this one. I don't know where I'm going with this but like........yngyu needed a comeback don't you think? I'm still thinking if I'll make a written chapter
in which you and beomgyu go on a small vacation together. the problem? you two broke up before your 2-year anniversary. but it's okay, you two are just friends again, right?
pairing: beomgyu x fem!reader
genre: fluff, humor and an attempt at being angsty; only one bed trope; smau series
cw: guys honestly i don't even know anymore pls bare with me ok; swearing? Not much, I just wanted to write again.
an: It's been a while with this one. I don't know where I'm going with this but like........yngyu needed a comeback don't you think? I'm still thinking if I'll make a written chapter
in which you and beomgyu go on a small vacation together. the problem? you two broke up before your 2-year anniversary. but it's okay, you two are just friends again, right?
pairing: beomgyu x fem!reader
genre: fluff, humor and an attempt at being angsty; only one bed trope; smau series
cw: guys honestly i don't even know anymore pls bare with me ok; swearing? Not much, I just wanted to write again.
an: It's been a while with this one. I don't know where I'm going with this but like........yngyu needed a comeback don't you think? I'm still thinking if I'll make a written chapter
series masterlist
regular masterlist
6- Just beg and hope for the best
tag list (send me an ask if you want to be added!): @soobinieswife @yaintpaint @thearchersupremacy @woncheecks @bamgeutori @qfeet @stwq2349 @buttersoob @yjnwonstars @oceanofloor (I thinkI forgot someone, so if tou asked me to be in the tag list and your name isn't here, please send me an ask!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
in which you and beomgyu go on a small vacation together. the problem? you two broke up before your 2-year anniversary. but it's okay, you two are just friends again, right?
pairing: beomgyu x fem!reader
genre: fluff, humor and an attempt at being angsty; only one bed trope; smau series
cw: exes to friends (kinda) to lovers; they're stupid; txt and le sserafim are part of it obvi; language; probably a bit suggestive?
List of chapters:
Pilot- Hey girl heyyyy
1- All women do is lie
2- Oui Oui
3- Prayed for his downfall
4- A series of unfortunate events
5- Bonsoir madame
6- Just beg and hope for the best
a/n: Hiiii hiiii!!!!! this is inspired by a tiktok I saw a little while ago and I thought it would be nice to make a small smau series about it hehe
If you don't take the hint already I'm afraid I'll start a riot
Synopsis: Having the courage to open up your heart to love is a step you've never taken. The risks just outweigh the rewards too much in your brain, even if the reward can be the cutest guy you've ever seen. But doesn't fate have a say in this stuff too?
loosely based on art class by beabadobee
Contents: shy yearner!beomgyu x avoidant yearner!reader, downbad-ism, hopecore, boemgyu and reader are art students, based on this ask by @tulip-bytecoreva-exe <3
this is purely fictional and does not reflect the actual person in any way
It was a very hot afternoon. The kind of afternoon where anyone else would be thanking God that they were inside a classroom with air conditioning. You werenât though. The air conditioner didnât really work for you. You were sweating buckets from nervousness alone. Beomgyu hadnât turned around the entire class. You only get to see him once every Wednesday at the art class that you guys have in common. He would turn and look around once in a while, youâd catch each otherâs eyes, and then nervously look away. It was almost like a routine. But all you were doing this Wednesday was looking at the back of his head. God, even the back of his head looked handsome.
You must have talked to him, maybe, once? That is if you count the squeaky âIâm sorryâ that you could barely force out of yourself after bumping into him on the first day of class.
He seemed like a pretty shy person. Itâs not like he didnât have any friends; youâve seen him walking around campus with his friends. He looked like a completely different person around them though. Goofy in the most adorable way possible, like a puppy thatâs out for a walk for the first time ever, and outspoken in way youâd have never imagined from his classroom âquiet guyâ persona. You caught his eye once when he was with one of his freakishly tall friends. He instantly went quiet, as if on cue, and fully turned in the opposite direction. What were you even supposed to make of that?!
âI think heâs just too shy to talk to youâ, your best friend had said, the day of that incident, while you were idling around on your dorm couch at night.
âWhat if he hates me and thinks Iâm creepy cause I keep staring at him in class? What if he thinks Iâm a psycho thatâs obsessed with him or something?â
âArenât you though?â, she said, and youâre not completely sure that she was joking.
âDo you wanna get hit in the head?â, you said, throwing a pillow at her.
âIn all seriousness though, why donât you just talk to him?â
This is a question youâve asked yourself quite a few times too. If you were being completely honest, you were scared. Scared that he wonât like you back. Or worse, that heâll say he does and itâll be a lie. To you, or maybe himself. Thatâs a pretty common fear though. No, you were also frying much bigger fish here. You were scared for a whole plethora of reasons that didnât really have anything to do with him honestly. The actual reason was that you were too accustomed to your routine. Talking to him meant change. Change in your life, your thoughts. You wake up in the morning, take a shower, make your coffee, and you go about your day. Thatâs your routine. You liked your routine. It kept you sane, it was peaceful. Letting him into your life, fully, meant changes to that routine that you wonât be able to control, no matter how hard you try. Wondering whether you will see him today, talk to him, whether he will talk to you, wondering what heâll think when you tell him stories from your hometown. Letting him into your life meant adjusting his routine around your routine. Have you mentioned that you like your routine? What is the guarantee his life will fit in your life? What if it doesnât and all the effort just becomes a waste of your time. Or worse, it becomes a waste of his time.
But thatâs a lot to unpack so you just shrug and say, âNot worth the risk I guessâ.
Thatâs what youâve always said. Your entire life. It was obviously a lie.
And as you are sitting here in class, religiously staring at the back of his head, itâs all that you can think about.
Unknown to you though, the reason Beomgyu is not turning around today, is because heâs scared. Turning around and looking at you is the only thing he can think of right now, but heâs restraining himself with every bit of strength that he has in his bones. Getting to see you, and maybe even talk to you one day, is like 70% of the reason he shows up to this class in the first place. The first day of class, when you bumped into him, gave him that awkward yet adorable smile, he knew he was a goner. Ever since then, he has been, in his friendâs words, âpiningâ for you. But unfortunately for him, heâs not the best at interactions. Thatâs more his friendsâ department. And it didnât really help that every time he turned around to look at you, or spotted you around campus, you looked at him like you would rather be having a stroke than look at his face. His friends say heâs exaggerating but he swears thatâs what it looks like to him. It never stopped him from turning around to catch a glimpse though. He just couldnât help himself.
The reason heâs not turning around today though, is because Taehyun got in his head about how you probably find it creepy that a random guy just keeps looking at you for no reason and how he needs to dial it down or heâs gonna catch himself a court order. Canât argue it with, heâd find it creepy too. And itâs not like you ever gave him any clear signals too. But he could swear that at times he caught you looking at him while turning his head in your direction. Thatâs one thing he couldnât explain and also what kept him a little hopeful he canât lie.
Just then the teacher cleared her throat. The entire class knew what was coming. Great, something to take your mind off of this mess.
âSoo⊠I have exciting newsâ, the teacher said. The entire classroom perked up. One thing you absolutely love about art class is that everyone whoâs there, genuinely wants to be there. You all collectively look forward to the creative assignments your professor gives you. Art, for every artist, is a way of expression. And the assignments give that expression a direction.
âI am going to partner each of you with a person from this class. I want you guys to hang out, get to know each other, have some deep talks, share some fears, try to understand each other. Then I want you to paint what getting to know that person felt like to you. I want you to, in your own way and sense, try to capture the essence of being with that person in your paintings. Expression is a very core part of art so I want you to be able to express your life and the things around you in your own personal way.â
Beomgyu nearly jumped out of his seat. He had never been much for praying but in that moment, he decided he would genuinely become a devout if you were made his partner. Because there would be no other explanation for that. It would have to be a blessing from above. He crossed both of his fingers. He would cross his toes if he wasnât wearing shoes.
You on the other hand were almost hyperventilating. Just the thought of being possibly partnered up with Beomgyu was making you genuinely see stars. You were excited, nervous, anticipating. You were feeling every single emotion that you were capable of feeling in that moment.
Just then the teacher started announcing the names of the partners. Your name came up after three pairs.
What were you hoping for? Did you want it to be him? Did you not want it to be him? You werenât sure. One thing that was clear though, was that you had your fingers crossed for both of your hands. Doesnât that say a lot?
âY/n and⊠Beomgyuâ, the teacher said with an unusual perk that you wouldâve noticed if it werenât for the whirlwind going on in your stomach.
This time Beomgyu did actually jump out of his seat, looked around awkwardly realizing what he had done, and then quietly sat back down. Heâd feel embarrassed in any normal situation, but this was no normal situation. He was literally living his daydreams. He pinched himself, just in case, to make sure.
After class, he appeared in front of your seat in record time, he even shocked himself.
âHey, Iâm Beomgyu. Weâre.. uh partnered together for the assignment I think?â Very smooth you absolute loser idiot, he thought to himself.
You looked up at him, and then, nothing. You did nothing. You just looked at him. Like you were petrified or something. You tried to speak, you knew what to say, you opened your mouth, and then nothing. Nothing came out. There was a lump in your throat that you could not seem to get rid of no matter how hard you swallowed.
His brows started to furrow. He started panicking.
âYeahâ, a pause that under normal circumstances could be ignorable, but here felt like a valley of distance between the both of you. âYeah Iâm sorry hii Iâm y/nâ, you finally managed something, this has to call for a celebration.
To Beomgyu, this whole altercation felt like someone was keeping you on gunpoint. So, he did what he thought was the sensible thing to do. âYou look uncomfortable. Do you want me to talk to the teacher about switching partners?â, because genuinely what else was he supposed to do here. He was convinced you despised him.
That sent your brain into a frenzy. He hates me, he wants to get rid of me, getting partnered with me is a bother to him.
And then it hit you. Straight to your head like a brick but instead of bleeding your dry, it woke you up.
No. This was a crazy opportunity that was just thrown into your lap. Just like that. Youâve never been too brave. All youâve ever been is scared. But how long can you live your life like that? At what point do you just have to stand up for once in your goddamn life and experience something? Youâve read tales of star-crossed lovers, torn apart by fate and all their other thousand enemies. But this? Just a stupid painting assignment. And youâre seriously gonna run away from it just because you canât bring yourself to trust yourself with trying? Pathetic. No, this has to start somewhere.
âNo, itâs nothing like that. I was just a little zoned out thatâs all. Iâd love to get to know you. For the assignment.â
Beomgyu had to physically contain himself from actually jumping, shouting, and running around the classroom right now. He was talking to you. This was so insane for him. You were talking to him. You said that you wanted to do the assignment with him.
You exchanged contacts and he practically went frolicking out the door.
You stood there for a second to take a few breaths. The way you were beaming and feeling proud of yourself youâd think you had single handedly overthrown a corrupt government or something. All you did was say a few stuttering words to your crush. But damn if you didnât feel like you had concurred the world right there.
As you made your way towards the exit of the classroom, you caught your teacherâs eyes. She gave you a very playful wink and then went back to going over what youâre guessing are the paintings from the last assignment.
Huh? Wait a minute. What was that?
That confused you. Was it fate or was it just an over-meddling teacher?
Whatever it was, you were glad for it.
You put in your headphones, hit shuffle, and started making your way to your dorm building.
They say you'll never meet your favorite singer...
Let alone watch him proudly admire the crafts your kindergarteners made.Â
As a kindergarten teacher your days are filled with finger paint, storybooks, sing-songing nursery rhymes and tiny hands constantly tugging at your sleevesânot the possibility of catching the attention of your ultimate bias. The chance to meet your favorite people in the world at a fansign was supposed to be a once in a lifetime memory. You never expected that one brief encounter of sharing gifts from your littlest friends would become the beginning of a story that felt too far out your reach and of your wildest dreams.Â
Somewhere between shared smiles, thoughtful little gifts and moments that were never meant to happen, the life you've always known begins to intertwine with the one you've only ever watched from afar.
You were only supposed to admire him.
No one ever warned you what happens when he starts looking back.
Authors Note: Ahhhhhh! I am so excited to start this series! And I hope that you love it as much as I loved writing it! If there are any mistakes or grammar issues please pretend you didnt notice them :)
cw: idol/fan dynamic, secret dating, emotional pining, media scrutiny, jealousy, eventual mature themes/smut, emotional angst, updates warnings as needed.
âHH masterlistâ
ââŽïžËïœĄâ
The first thing you noticed every morning was the silence.
Before the tiny footsteps, before the excited chatter, before little hands reached for your sleeves and voices called out, âMiss Y/N!â or the more affectionate name that you gained from your students, âMiss Honeyâ, from across the room. There was only the quiet hum of the classroom waiting to be filled.
You unlocked the door, stepped inside and smiled. The warm smile that reached beyond both of your cheeks and spread up into your eyes.Â
The familiar scent of crayons, construction paper and yesterdayâs finger paint lingered in the air. You reached for the light switch,and one by one, the classroom came alive beneath the warm glow of the ceiling lights. The colorful artwork taped along the walls, the neatly arranged storybooks and the tiny chairs lined up around the tables all greeted you like old friends.
For a moment you stood there and let yourself take it all in.
Every morning was a small reminder of how lucky you were. Now of course not every day was easyâthere were spilled paints, forgotten lunches, tears over broken crayons, missing mommies and daddies and endless questions that somehow always came at the same timeâbut you wouldnât trade any of it. You worked far too hard for it. The dream that youâve had since you were little. To be a nurturer, a safe place for someone (no matter how little) to come to. The laughter, the curiosity, the little moments of trust from the children who looked at you like you had all the answers in the world⊠these were the things that made every early morning of dragging yourself out of bed worth it.
You placed your bag on the desk and began preparing for another day of stories, songs and tiny discoveries.
Another day of little hands reaching for yours.
Another day you were grateful to be exactly where you were.
Before you knew it, parents were at the open door of your classroom, ready to wish their squishy faced and excited buzzing bodies of 5 year olds to have a great day. Hugs and kisses pressed to rounded cheeks before hurrying feet rushed into the sanctuary of your classroom, ready to play.Â
The first little body ready to rush in belonged to that of Soo-ah, the extremely extroverted and bubbly little girl whose voice was always heard a decibel louder than others. âMiss Honey!â she screeched while crashing into your legs âGood morning! Mommy brought me first because I was so exciting to see you!â. Your heart swelled at the comment that the doe-eyed girl made not bothering to correct her as you crouched down to return the squeeze just as tight. âGood morning Soo-ah, I am so excited to see you and all our friends today too. Go ahead and sit on the meeting rug while we wait for the rest of our friends to comeâ you answered. With that her sparkly pink butterfly backpack was quickly hung in the brown set of cubbies right under her nametag by the front door of the classroom and rushed feet to plop down onto the colorful rug with the patterned pastel circles. You stood from your crouch to smooth your hands down the light blue dress you chose this morning, straightening out the cream cardigan that was paired after Soo-ahâs little hands gripped and shifted the collar around.Â
The rest of the morning followed in a familiar rhythm. One by one your classroom slowly filled with the little personalities that made each day brighter. Min-jun arrived holding tightly onto his father's hand, hiding behind his leg until you crouched down and asked about the dinosaur shirt he was wearing to which he shyly smiled and slowly showed you. Yuna came in proudly carrying a flower she had picked from her garden, insisting that it was "the prettiest one because it looked like Miss Honey."
After 20 minutes, your classroom was ready to start the day as you sat in the rocking chair in front of the rug adorned with 16 little people, pulling out the first picture book of the day to share with their listening ears and wide eyes.Â
The book was barely halfway open before little hands began to rise.
âMiss Honey, why does the bunny have a carrot?â Min-jun asked, his eyebrows furrowed with the seriousness of someone solving the worldâs greatest mystery.
A few children giggled, and you smiled as you turned the page, answering each question that came your way. Reading time rarely stayed just reading time. Somehow a story about a little rabbit searching for his family always turned into a conversation about pets, gardens, favorite foods and what everyone wanted to be when they grew up.
You loved that about them.
Their minds were endless places of wonder and every day they reminded you to slow down and appreciate the smallest things.
When the story finally came to an end, a chorus of tiny voices cheered for the reunion of the bunny family and you closed the book with a laugh.
âAlright friends. Before we start our next activity, who remembers what day it is today?â Several hands shot into the air immediately.
âTuesday!â Soo-ah shouted confidently.
You tilted your head pretending to think with a finger tapping your chin playfully. âAre we sure?â
The room erupted into giggles as a few children quickly changed their answers.
âFriday!â someone called.
âThatâs tomorrow,â you corrected laughing.
The morning continued just as it always didâmessy, loud, and full of little moments you wished you could bottle up forever. It was easy to forget about everything outside these four walls when you were surrounded by sixteen children who believed every drawing was a masterpiece and every story deserved to be heard.
Until Soo-ah suddenly raised her hand again.
âYes, Soo-ah?â
Her eyes lit up as if she had been waiting for the perfect moment to ask.
âMiss Y/N,â she said, tilting her head, âare you really meeting your favorite singer this weekend?âÂ
It was no secret your love for music. Whether it was the instrumental versions of your favorite songs playing softly in the bright and colorful space of your classroom, or if it were weekends spent with your best friend, Nara, watching countless videos of your favorite groups, gushing over your favorites when they came on the screen. You had always found comfort in music.
It was something that followed you through every season of your life. A familiar melody during a busy morning, a song that made you smile after a long day, or the excitement of watching artists you admired pour their hearts into every performance.
Your students had picked up on it too.
Five year olds noticed everything.
They knew which songs made you dance while cleaning up the classroom. They knew which voices made you smile when they came through your phone speakers. They even knew the name of the singers and groups whose pictures occasionally appeared on your lock screen and whose photocard nestled safely in the back of your phone case.
Choi Soobin.
Your favorite. The one who somehow managed to stay your favorite through every phase, every comeback and every season of your life.
You had been a fan of TXT for years, long enough that it almost felt like you had grown alongside them. You had watched them step into the industry as young boys chasing a dream, seen their confidence grow with every performance and found pieces of yourself reflected in their journey.
But Soobin has always held a special place in your heart.
Maybe it was the way he carried himself with a quiet kind of warmth that never demanded attention but always seemed to draw people in. Maybe it was the way he cared for the people around him, always making sure everyone felt included, even when he was the one carrying the weight of being a leader. Or maybe it was the little things that made him feel familiar despite the impossible distance between you.
The way he laughed when he was genuinely happy with pools of dimples in his cheeks.
The way he spoke gently to fans.
The way he admitted his worries and imperfections instead of pretending he had everything figured out.
There was something comforting about watching someone who seemed so kind exist in a world that could often feel overwhelming.
Through stressful days, long nights and moments where you questioned whether you were doing enough, his words and the music he created with TXT had always been a small reminder to keep going.
Of course you knew the reality of it.
He was an idol. Someone you admired from afar. Someone whose life existed on stages, behind screens and in moments you were lucky enough to witness.
He didn't know your name.
He didn't know about your classroom, your students or the way you played his group's music softly while preparing lesson plans.
And that was okay.
Being a fan was never about expecting anything in return.
It was simply being grateful that someone you had never met could bring so much happiness into your life.
Which was why the thought of finally meeting him still felt impossible.
After years of cheering for him from the other side of a screen you were actually going to be standing in front of Choi Soobin.
So when the topic of the fansign you were attending with your best friend came up, it was no surprise that they were immediately fascinated.
âMiss Honey,â Soo-ah asked, her little hand shooting into the air before you had even finished putting away the books, âare you going to see him soon?â
The question caught you off guard for a moment before a smile tugged at your lips.
âI am,â you answered, nodding while brushing hair behind your ears. âThis weekend, actually.â
Immediately sixteen pairs of eyes turned toward you with the same curiosity they always had whenever something new caught their attention.
âWhere is he?â Min-jun asked.
âDoes he live in your phone?â another child questioned, earning a round of giggles from the others.
You laughed softly, shaking your head. âNo, silly. Heâs a person just like us. He just happens to be someone who sings and dances for a lot of people.â Trying to answer their question as simply as five year olds can understand.
âSo he makes people happy?â Yuna asked, looking down at the flower still carefully held between her tiny fingers.
Your expression softened.
âYeah,â you said quietly. âHe does.â
That seemed to be all the explanation they needed.
Because to your students, making someone happy was the simplest and most important thing in the world.
âThen we should make him something!â Soo-ah announced.
You blinked.
âSomething?â
She nodded enthusiastically, as if the answer was obvious. âA present! Because he makes you happy.â
A chorus of agreement immediately followed.
âI can draw him a dinosaur!â
âI can make a flower!â
âI can share my stickers!â
âI can make him a card!â
Within seconds, your calm classroom transformed into a storm of excited voices and tiny hands waving in the air.
You couldn't help but laugh.
âYou all want to make something for him?â
Sixteen heads nodded eagerly.
And before you knew it, your simple plan of bringing a few gifts from home had turned into a classroom project.
The craft table was covered with colorful paper, washable markers, glitter that would somehow end up everywhere and the kind of excitement only children could create.
You watched as they carefully thought about what they wanted to give someone they had never met.
Someone who, to them, wasn't a famous singer or someone thousands of people admired.
He was simply the person who made their teacher smile.
Summary: When your creepy ex boyfriend wonât stop stalking you, the only thing you can think of is to ask your best friend Huening Kai to help you get away from him by starting a fake relationship.
‷ best friend! Huening Kai x fem! reader
files đŹ.⊠ĘË :
ch. 01 â only pretend
ch. 02 â unwanted encounter
ch. 03 â official
ch. 04 â drunk Kai activities
ch. 05 â dumb drunken decisions
ch. 06 â my place tonight
ch. 07 â expected explanation
ch. 08 â truth or dare
ch. 09 â late night drive
ch. 10 â regret
! Mini chapters :
M1 ~ sleepover
This master list is UNFINISHED!! Likes and reblogs are appreciated :) ask to be added to the Taglist!
SYNOPSIS ⧜ you were alone. alone and pregnant, no parents or friends to support you. whoever the father of your baby was, he wouldnât bother to be in your life. with no money or a place to stay anymore, youâre faced with an opportunity to get the money you need. now, despite being surrounded by death, you meet a man who manages to make moments in a horrifying place something warm and tender.
WARNINGS squid game (two and three) au, reader is lightly based on junhee, but the plot that happens to her doesnât actually happen to reader. ANGST, major character death, injuries, descriptive gore and harsh language, mentions of drugs, near death experiences, soobin being extremely loving since day one, hostile!reader (in a way), comfort/fluff, panic attacks, descriptive childbirth, falling in love/romance, death in general (itâs squid game câmon..), ocs, horror settings, follows the same game and some events of s2-3 but not necessarily the same plotline, no bathroom brawl or lights out, child abandonment, thoughts about abortion, description of depression, miscarriages, mentions of illnesses and alcoholism, some idols are used as ocs and likely not accurate to their personalities, this is NOT fully focused on reader and soobin only it also explores the group dynamics so keep this in mind, slight transphobia nearing the end.
MDNI oral (fem receiving), public sex, creampie, p in v, unprotected sex (donât!!), service top/soft dom soobin, missionary, fingering, petnames (sweet girl, baby, mama, etc.), safe words, body worship.
á wc ïč 38.9k
     BETRAYAL BURNED BITTER AND HEAVY on your tongue. You forced yourself to swallow it down alongside your clumping thoughts, the ones that ached and felt like salt rubbed in open, raw wounds that never closed since they were inflicted onto you. You shouldâve expected it, as friendly as everyone is, deep down the true wish of oneâs heart always wins. It isnât about charisma, empathy, nor the empty words they say when they say they want you alive and well. Deep down, you all hoped the other would die. That was the true nature of this game.
Beomgyuâs life looked drained out of him. Ever since you came back to the main room, full of bunks with the lingering ghosts of people who were once here but werenât anymore sat atop of them. They would just be taken and occupied by other players. The thought left you quite eerie despite the relief that burst through your chest when you saw Soobin was alive.
But not all of you left that room.
Your mind was haunted by the sobs and pleas Kai directed towards Beomgyu, who by now, hadnât even dared to look at anyone else in the face. He was curled up against the cold wall, knees tucked into his chest as if he were a child all over againâ one that waited for his motherâs comfort. But maybe Beomgyu wouldnât even see his mother anymore.
You could tell that he was blaming himself, but when you opened your mouth to speak, you just shut it back. What would you even say? Iâm sorry he died, heâs in a better place?Â
What even is a better place?
What place could possibly be better than all of you leaving alive and together? You bit your lip, swallowing down your emotions in order to not let them flood you again. What was better than a tomorrow where all of you were together?
You werenât sure when the lines between strangers and family blurred, tied and knotted together by the challenges and death. And yet, even as all of you mourned in silence, Beomgyu was carrying a heavier burden. He was closer to Kai more than anyone else was, and there wasnât a moment where you hadnât seen them apart. Most of all, the bright blue patch that was meant to secure his debts were paid off by the time he left burned through his tracksuit and into his skin. Like a choice that choked you and pushed your head underwater, one that crawled onto your skin and made home inside your skin until it took over your life.
All of you had cried long enough during the game, now all that was left was the grief.
"I hope weâll be able to leave." Yeonjunâs voice was quiet, his body still tense from adrenaline. Eyes staring ahead and hardened like he had seen too much. "I really, really do. I donât want any more of us to die."
"Maybe we will." Soobinâs eyes flickered from where he had been absentmindedly staring at the crowd. The guards hadnât quite come in yet, you guessed, dealing with bodies was more complicated than coming to deal with a bunch of terrified players. "I counted the players by their patchesâboth sides. Thereâs fifty six blues and forty four reds."
"How do you know thatâll guarantee weâll be able to leave after this voting?" Taehyun inquired, it was a fair enough point. You were outnumbered.
Soobinâs hand stopped the soothing movements on your side, he had been moving his thumb back and forth as if to tell himself that you were both still here. His hands refused to leave you ever since you two finally shared a kiss inside the mingle room.
"It looks like a big difference, but if you stop to think about it, itâs not that much." He paused, letting the words sink before continuing. "If twelve people change their minds, then weâll already tie. And Iâm sure that most people were terrified enough during mingle to change their minds."
"What guarantees that people on our side wonât change their minds?" Yeonjun asked.
"The cash prize is already very generous, since there are only a hundred of us left, itâs probably somewhere around thirty five millionâ something around that. Itâs already good, and considering people were already voting to leave last round, I doubt theyâll go for a higher price when they were already trying to leave with a lower amount of money." Soobin explained, clearing his dried up throat.
Truly, what was more annoying than the expanding anxiety was probably how you werenât constantly provided with water. No one was, because the games were about âequality.â
Pure fucking bullshit.
"Shouldnât we try to go and convince the people on the other side, then?" Taehyun jerked his head towards the opposite side to yours, where all the others who planned to keep playing until they died whispered and talked in hushed voices like a plotting group of criminals.
Most of them probably were way past the average criminal, anyway.
The thought made your stomach twist into itself.
"No, itâs too dangerous." He wasnât wrongâ the people on the opposite side were borderline bloodthirsty. Without a doubt, theyâd kill the people from their own side if it meant more money or living one more day. Theyâd just target all of you.Â
They already had a bone to pick with some of you from last voting, you could tell.
"Theyâre all willing to play no matter what. If we go over there, they wonât take it as well as we mean to come across." Something seemed to flicker in Taehyunâs eyes during that moment, something no one really caught on. Your gut felt weird, something was off but you couldnât pinpoint what was wrong.
Something almost like satisfaction.
"So we just stay here praying theyâll change their minds?" You bawled your hands into fists, rubbing away the forming sweat alongside the soiled fabric of your tracksuit pants. "What if we lose?"
Your voice cracked, feeling uneven at places where you couldnât sustain it anymore. You really didnât want anyone else to dieâbut you swallowed whatever you could down your dry throat. It felt like a brick, hard to swallow and overwhelming like the rest of this game.
"We wonât." Taehyun suddenly asserted, jaw pulled taut before he released it like he had been profusely thinking for a split moment. "Iâm sure of it."
As if right on cue, the guards in the pink suits that you grew to dread stepped inside through the loud clang of the metal doors. Mechanical, like they had been trained for this their whole lives. You wondered how sick they had to be to kill so naturally.Â
"All of you here passed the third game, we extend our hearty congratulations." You were tired of this voice by now. You were sure it wasnât even realâ altered by some sort of voice changer because they had to remain anonymous. "Iâm now going to announce the cash prize."
You wondered if this was the same square guard that greeted you.
Just how many of them worked here, really? How big was this facility?
You grimaced at the thought you were all just entertainment. Your deaths, your broken pleas for one more moment alive, all a show for someone bigger to stare and laugh at like a casual television show.
With the buzz of the controller, no one moved. All thoughts that most of you would die if you kept going completely poofed from the minds of most, inexistent as the golden light shone across the wide expanse of the room, the gelid atmosphere suddenly tensing and pulled taut as the money started dropping like a fountain into the huge piggy bank that hung above your heads.
Soobin wasnât wrong about the money count. It was enough to most of youâ to all players who intended to leave this hellhole.
You forced yourself to narrow your mind down solely to the rising number of people against this game, on the way you still had the people you grew fond of next to you. To the possibility that Soobin would probably manage to leave this place with you, that you would both manage to raise your daughterâ
No, not only yours.Â
Soobin had been more of a father than Sunghoon ever made himself to be. Even if she wasnât his by blood, it doesnât mean the title is his. Soobinâs face is tense, his usual smile and carefree expression vanished, leaving behind a quiet determination and a layer beneath it that spoke of fear. Still, he never once broke. Mentally, or from the hold of your hand unless absolutely necessary.
"Player 454, please cast your vote." Your eyes never left Yeonjunâs back as he pushed through the players standing at the front, his posture straight and uncaring, but you could tell he was probably scared too, at least deep down. "And to make sure the voting will solely be based on democracy, any type of interference is completely forbidden."
The buzzer of the red button being pressed down filled the room, no one dared to speak as Yeonjun took his respective side on the great, red X sign that illuminated his features and shone bright beneath his feet.
Your name is called next. You let go of Soobinâs hand, looking behind your shoulder to find him already staring at you. He didnât speak, and didn't need to reassure you. He was already sure youâd all leave, and he wanted you to count on it.Â
A weight of a thousand stares pressed on your shoulders, your teeth clenched with the expectation of every single person in this room. You could practically hear their thoughtsâ wishing on your death in later games for being an easy target, begging you to not change your mind silently, begging for you to keep going only to exploit you later on.
You slammed the red button with a bit more force than necessary.
This time, you didnât look back. Your chest burned with the tiniest of sparks, a hope that could be put out, but you were sure you wouldnât. Not this time.
No one had dared to speak up during voting, the room was a mere sound of echoing footsteps against the polished and grimy floor and the buzzer that, every time pressed, decided the fate of all of you. The numbers flew up fast, no one hesitated, and those who did always pressed with a sag of shoulders of either relief or regret. Despite the fact you kept your face unmoving, your heart was spiking in your chest with every breath that took too long to leave as your eyes locked on the numbers.
Numbers. Your dislike for numbers would always haunt you. You just had one more reason to hate them now.
You were squeezing the life out of Soobinâs hand, the building anxiety you didnât let your face show had to go somewhere. Every step that sounded in your ears was too loud, every press of the buzzer button made your breath lock or quicken.
You met Yeonjunâs eyes as the difference between votes was only two people apart. Two people changing their mind or staying put on the idea of living and you would tie. "Just two more."
He was grinning with excitement that breached through his nerves, fingers held up half expecting you not to hear him when you could. The room was already far too silent.
A tie.
Your stomach churned. You stared at the numbers that felt almost dizzying, the X side was one vote short because the last woman changed her mind.Â
"Player number one, please cast your vote."
"Itâs Taehyun." Soobin breathed in relief, Yeonjun met your eyes with a smile so wide it was as if he had won the lottery instead of having to fight to possible death for this money. "Weâll leave."
His steps were slow, way too slow, as if he was calculating something. It didnât sit right with you, but you forced yourself to smile just as wide to not rub Yeonjun off the wrong way. Then you darted your eyes to Beomgyu, who was behind him.
He was already staring at you. His eyes spoke what he hadnât spoken since he set foot back inside the room. While Taehyun seemed to take an eternity and his own time to reach the front of the room, you slipped away from Soobinâs sideâ he held your wrist for a moment.
"Whatâs wrong?" He whispered, eyes flickering between you and the voting table.
You forced yourself to swallow down your uneasiness, the one that made even a smile hurt. "Nothing, just checking on Beomgyu."
He nodded, letting go with lingering eyes. "I need to tell you somethingâlike, really badly." Beomgyu whispered in a rapid fire speech, his eyes wide, almost as wide as they had been when Kai had been shot in front of him. You frowned, stepping closer in order for him to whisper in your ear, concealing the private matter he desperately looked like he had been trying to get out. The air felt wrong, like it took an uninvited shift that only needed a simple invite.Â
"When Taehyun and I went into the room, the mingle one. He killâ"
The buzzer burst through your ears before Beomgyu could even finish his sentence, but it wasnât the one you had expected. It wasnât the buzz of salvation, it was the one that made your heart stutter in your chest. The one that made your world flip to the side before it was upside down. The one that felt like perfectly positioned knuckles on your ribs.Â
The difference in numbers as you slowly trailed your eyes towards the screen was dizzying, you had to force down the bile that came up your throat and burn in an acidifying way. You swallowed it down, hands shaky as you fought to keep your breakfast downâ lunch, dinner, whatever the hell it was.
Time had lost its meaning a long time ago. It warped and bent right to the wind of whoever had the upper hand in the games.
Taehyun didnât even look back at anyone, he wasnât the type to look behind when he made a choice. He had not looked at Yeonjun, not at Beomgyuâ not at Soobin. But he looked back for a split second to look at you. Your jaw tightened, feeling like it might snap as his eyes, so intense, burned straight through yours.
He smiled. A quick quiver of lips that was almost imperceptible, but it was there. The side of people who wanted to continue greeted him with cheers, smacking him in the back like he was someone great. It was a lie, everyone knew. People greeted one another on the continuing side in a meaningless way because of the same ideals, but it was a false illusion. One that was broken by the sharp blade of either a literal knife, or the knife of betrayal that burned and choked you alive before a gunshot or a pair of hands stronger than your own ever could.
You went through a whirlwind of emotions. Betrayal burned inside your heart, dampening the small spark of hope you carried so dear within yourself. Then it molded into something angry and ugly without you even meaning it to do so. You were clearly livid, Beomgyu was wordless next to you, mouth hanging open as if his words were on the tip of his tongue, but they were cruelly ended by the choice that kept all of you stuck in here.
"The results of the voting are 51 for O and 49 for X. Based on majority voting, weâll proceed to the fourth game tomorrow. Thank you for your cooperation." The square masked guard announced in a monotone speech you unintentionally had already memorized, but it never ceased to make your bones weaken like jelly.
The players scattered, some breaking down once again, some didnât have hope. The loud voices that boomed from the opposite side grated on your ears, and every time you replayed that smile in your mind, rage seemed to spread impossibly deeper inside of you. This was what you were afraid of. You knew that trusting too much meant a high chance of betrayal especially with not much time spent with one another, but still, it never once managed to make you not weak on the knees.
âY/N, come on. Let's go sit down.â Soobinâs voice called out from all the haze of thoughts and bitter sentiments. âWeâll figure it out.â His voice was strained, you could tell Soobin was pissed. He wasnât as untrusting as you were, maybe this stung harder on him than it did on you. Despite that, he still managed to put on the same front he always tries to put on for you. Someone had to remain level headed here, even if it was hard.
âI canât believe he justâ fucking hell.â Yeonjun hissed, steps a bit too quick for someone who was supposedly fine. âThat fucking asshole.â
âIâd say he had his reasons, but he didnât even try to look at us in the face.â Soobin sighed, free hand pinching the bridge of his nose as your footsteps climbed over the steps onto the small, somewhat safe haven you built with what you had. Anything was better than nothing within these games. âHas he been using us all along?â
âWhy would he?â You breathed out, attempting to gain a semblance of calm. You really did want to give Taehyun the benefit of doubt, but his choice didnât make any sense in your mind. If he had possibly been using all of you, then what for? And what could possibly have made him change his mind? The only solid reason you had in mind was because maybe he needed an initial alliance, however, if he wanted to just dump all of you, then why would he even form one? The further you went down the rabbit hole of thoughts, the further you seemed from an actual answer. And truly, you really doubted Taehyun, now sitting down and from where you could see him talking with the biggest smile on his face with another player who had voted to continue, would bother explaining anything to you at all.
âI donât know, but raising our hopes up just to crush them makes him one of the biggest assholes around.â Yeonjun scoffed, body thudding against the bed he was now sitting, the old springs from the mattress that creaked under his weight initiated the silence. Even then, it was still a silent conversation. What now?
Youâd have to just survive, somehow.
âDepending on what the next game is, we could take him out for this.â Beomgyu whispered, almost as if he was embarrassed to express the fact he was okay with killing a teammateâa friend, who just happened to switch up on all of you.
âWhat?â You blinked, forcing your jaw back up. He had just lost one of his friends, how come he could be okay with killing Taehyun? âBeomgyu, do you have any idea on what youâre saying?â âHe betrayed us, Y/N.â His eyes were sharp, words tinged with venomâ the same kind he had been drowning in while mourning Kai in secret all along. âHeâs not on our side anymore. He chose to continue, he saw Kai die, and he still chose to continue. Knowing how terrified Kai looked, knowing how scared everyone who died was. Heâs choosing to side with whoever the hell the gamemakers are.â âNo.â Soobin shook his head, hands fisting on the fabric of his once bright teal tracksuit pants. âBeomgyu, youâre mad, I get itââ
They werenât as pristine as they had been when you first arrived here, now, they were stained with blood and spoke of use and the heavy burden all of you carried together. But then again, nothing was pristine here anymore. Not your shoes that squeaked and stepped over blood a thousand of times, not your mental stability, or your sanity. Money lost its value when it was gained by blood indirectly or directly splattered on your hands for necessity, and as you had once thought about, for entertainment of a bigger group of people âaboveâ you.
It was these small ticks that made people snap and severed ties.
âNo, you donât get it!â Beomgyu snapped, heads snap from both sides just as quickly towards you, but no one addresses it. It isnât any of their business, either way. You couldnât tell if he was being moved by grief, anger, betrayal, or more and all things all blended together in a recipe for disaster. âSince he died, all of you have been acting likeâ like it was expected. It shouldnât have been! He knows he died, he saw Kai cry and still chose to continue this and crush our hopes! If anything, him dying makes him more guilty than I am!â
âBeomgyu, no one said anyone here is guilty. Least of all you.â Yeonjun spoke up after a moment of awkward silence, fingers nimbly picking at the strings that started to separate from the stitching of the sleeves of his jacket. âIf you condemn him so much for this, then donât stoop lower than him.â Beomgyu scoffed, he would have seemed completely pissed had his eyes not been shining, and not because of the lights that shone harshly above your heads as a contrast to the warm lighting the piggy bank holding money provided. âWhatever. Iâm going to bed.â Neither of you attempted to stop him, you knew he was like this because he wanted to blame anyone but himself. But truthfully, there was no one to blame for Kaiâs death but fate itself. Fate, the one thing that controlled everything and yet no one acknowledged it when things happened.
âHeâll come around eventually.â Soobin sighed, shifting to sit cross legged on the mattress. Time seemed to pass by way slower like this, the silence and lack of something as well as the tension was enough to cloud your brain. You managed a few bites of your food down, too. Though you didnât eat everything, Soobin made sure to wrap half of his and your leftover kimbap in a single piece of aluminum before tucking it underneath a bunk next to the mattress you two were sleeping in just in case you got hungry later.
But something didnât feel right.Â
When you initially grabbed the Kimbap, you didnât receive just that. You eyed the silver cutlery neatly tucked next to the Kimbap, and something twisted in your chest, something that left your mouth with a bitter taste. No one eats Kimbap with a fork. It was simple, and yet deadly if you used it the right way. The way the ones in control wanted you to use it.
Your eyes quickly darted around the room, then, only then did you see. Some players were looking back and forth across the room before shoving the fork inside their pockets like it was sacred. Some hid the forks underneath their pillows, or stuffed them inside within the stuffing. You werenât sure who was doing it for defense, or who was doing it for possible offense. But you gripped your own fork a bit tighter than usual.
They were doing this on purpose. Making you betray each other within the games wasnât enough entertainment, apparently. It was disgusting, something you could look down on and turn your nose at. But to whoever was in control of this, it was like betting on horses.
"I think theyâre going to try to kill each other." You whispered to Soobin, clenching your fork tighter. His puzzled expression clicked right onto understanding as he saw how protectively you held the fork. Who the hell eats Kimbap with a fork? "Theyâre making us eliminate each other and they know some will try."
"Itâs just a matter of when."Â
Soobin unwrapped the fork he had initially planned to throw away, staring at it as if figuring out what to do with it. It didnât matter if it was for defensive or offensive, the sharp, pointy teeth of the cutlery would make you kill nevertheless. He hadnât thought much of it, you doubted that anyone had thought much of a fork being wrapped alongside a Kimbap. They werenât dumb, the gamemakers. This was strategy.Â
They knew that most players who voted to continue and even more players who voted against were either too excited or too troubled by playing again tomorrow, either one of these feelings would make anyone not pay mind to the fork and focus on the day ahead. In a way, it was survival of the fittest. The smartest would realize and use it as an advantage over the people who were weak, not because they werenât strong physically, but because they hadnât realized fast enough.
"Theyâre trying to do everything to put us against each other." The fork you had in your hands was stuffed inside your pillowcase, carefully to the side to not poke you or Soobin while asleep, but also just close enough that you could reach out to it in case someone sneaked up on you. "Making us betray each other inside the games isnât enough for them."
Glances were exchanged amongst the players on the opposite side, murmurs were spoken rather than actual coherent conversation, it wasnât hard to notice they were planning something. Anything.
"Thatâs because weâre still in the games." Soobin looks unimpressed by now. Unlike you, who still managed to get surprised at the traps this place set or surprised at every single thing that turned out to be a worse outcome than the previous, Soobin looked like he had already gotten used to it. Nothing seemed to take him off guard anymore, it was more of a matter of how to handle it and how to carry on. "The games, to them, arenât just the arenas they set up for us. Weâre still playing, as long as we can kill each other, weâre still a show to watch."
"Do you think they got bored of watching us fight for our lives out there?" You snorted, but your mind was already thundering with different possible outcomes. "They want a bloodbath, not just for them to kill us."
"I wouldnât doubt it. They just grabbed desperate people off of the streets and brought them here to be some kind of series." Soobinâs jaw clenched as he stared ahead, not at anything in particular. You really wished you could understand what went on inside his head, from the moment he saw you narrowing down to right now. You just could hope it wasnât anything related to him sacrificing himself.
No, you told yourself. You wouldnât lose him again.
"I really want to get out of here."Â
By now, it wasnât just a want. It was a need. The grime clinging to your skin was enough for your nose to wrinkle whenever you acknowledge it, your muscles ached with every step, every staircase you went up, screaming at you to slow down and stop. But you didnât, you never did. Hell, you were sure that your hair wasnât just filthy with sweat, but also with blood. You werenât battered down just physically, either. It was mentally.
Frustration and stress, the sickening dread that made your heart race every time and took over your body was constant. It felt permanent, the games designed so youâd feel as if you wouldnât feel peace again. Like the only way to peace was to die. Because there were no winners in this game.
If you won, you were acutely aware that even if you left with Soobin, youâd be haunted by the souls of those who died here. Those who begged to be given another chance, people with families and distinct backgrounds. The thought of it alone was enough for something to jab at your heart.
"And we will." Soobin finally whispered after a second, the next time you met his face, he wasnât so tense anymore. He had that look in his eyes, tender and yet almost solemn as they trailed down to your stomach. A life that against all odds, was still here. Pushing through with you despite all death revolving around. "It doesnât matter if we have to play one or six games, I promised you weâd get out."
Soobin really wished he could believe in his own promise as much as you looked like you did. Even if he said it so fiercely, his promise rang hollow in his own ears.
"Isnât it ironic?" You muttered, changing the topic to avoid getting your hopes up again. It wasnât that you didnât trust Soobin, but deep down, you knew that somehow theyâd make you two pick between one another to survive. One of you would die in this place. "Thereâs a life inside of me, unborn yet and so much ahead of her and yet.. sheâs already surrounded by death before even starting her life."
Your hand drifted down to the curve of your stomach. Once you had been so excited to see her face, to feel her tiny hand wrap around your finger, to hear her cries and to finally see who youâve been fighting for despite life throwing hell at you. But now, seeing the cruelty that went on so easily, you werenât sure if your choice to keep her was right. Bringing such a fragile life into such a tainted world felt wrong, like you were just subjecting your baby to pain, even if it wasnât here yet or if it wasnât completely avoidable.
You loved your daughter, even if she wasnât here, you did. But these small doubts, the ones that were like rotten fruits in a basket full of healthy ones that only would taint the whole basket, made you rethink your choices. That maybe Sunghoon was right, maybe you should have gotten that abortion.
"As ironic as it is, it reflects on your own personal strength, and her own." Soobinâs hand landed atop of yours, hesitantly and slowly as if youâno, the moment was fragile. "You never fail to surprise me."
"Itâs just survival, thereâs nothing surprising in it."
"But there is. Itâs so much deeper than that, Y/N." For once, through the waver in his voice, you could see the cracks he had inside of him. Soobin wasnât perfect by any means, he was still human like anyone else. Being level headed didnât mean he didnât have his own pains. The thing was that he managed to conceal them well enough that theyâd never have to show up at all. At least not in front of others.Â
You didnât speak, you watched Soobin suck in a breath. You didnât press, if he wanted to speak or tell you anything, then let him do it on his own terms and pace. "When I was younger, maybe nine or ten. My mother was pregnant with her fourth child, we were all ecstatic. Pregnancy looked good on her because she loved the idea of bringing life into the world, to have something like a little bundle of joy to brighten her days." His throat bobbed, tight with the one thing he had never told anyone. "Long story short, she had a miscarriage. She took such good care of herself and yetâ"
The way he had been trying to keep it cool was almost instinctual, to look at the high ceiling above your heads and blink away the tears by staring at the harsh, burning light. As if the tears were something to be ashamed of, something that should be kept caged. He didnât need to speak any further, a sound or a syllable let out would for sure derail the force he was putting to keep his throat tight to force everything down. Being a leader to follow came with expectations, and expectations sometimes were destroyed by showing weakness.
Soobin crying wouldnât mean youâd change your view of him. Because you wouldnât, not at all.
Some of the players had already retreated to their beds, the once chaotic space that was filled with the weight of panic and triumph was now settling down to a silence. Faintly, the feminine voice from the PA system warned about sleeping time, though the both of you were too stuck in the moment to truly care.
You didnât have words for it. How could you? You had never lost a baby, let alone a sibling because you never had anyone before. It had always been you. But you could feel a sliver of his pain at the thought of losing your babyâthe way your heart gave a beat that went the wrong way. But you wouldnât manage to realize the extent. You couldnât tell him everything was alright, because some scars never truly faded and you knew it yourself. "Iâm so sorry for your loss, Soobin."
You pressed your lips together, you had never seen over the course of the few days you spent together any trace of pain flickering across his features, least of all had you seen him express it. Knowing nothing would fill the void the past left in him hurt, but the one thing you could do was fill that in, or at least try to, with happier memories.
"What was her name?" You opted for instead, shifting in order to sit on your heels.Â
"It was going to be Choi Eun-seo." He rasped out, muffling a sniffle on the palm of his handâ trying to mask it for a sneeze.
"You told me itâs okay to cry. To not act like it doesnât hurt." Slightly shaky hands lifted up from your lap to his face, almost like it came naturally to you. "Donât act like this is nothing. Like losing your sister even if you had never met her is nothing."
His skin was warm, soft despite the battered look Soobin started to reveal. One that spoke of the fights he has gone through, mental scars that resurfaced like rubbing salt on wounds that burned despite being so well kept. The warmth beneath your thumbs that moved in gentle caress dampened, like a crack in a dam.
His tears fell silent, almost as silent as his house was for years. He was pulled almost magnetically towards you, head lowering until it found a place of comfort in your chest. There was a lingering awkwardness to the position, but neither of you seemed to mind. Soobinâs tears werenât loud, rather, they were full body wrecks and shivers as your fingers carded through the strands of his hair. He had been here for you more times than you could count, for once and more times in the future, you hoped to be someone he could trust enough he didnât have to be strong constantly.
Both souls between the two of you seemed to slowly unravel and crawl away from their hiding. It was as delicate as it was beautiful.
Soobin had never mentioned how life became hard after that, how he had to grow up quicker than other kids his age. His siblings left a few years later, they didnât keep much contact, they just abandoned the thick air of grief that clung to the walls and lingered in the air from the dawning sun to the rising one. Nothing changed since Eun-seo died, theyâd never even met her, it was pointless to mournâthatâs what they said. But his mother took a hard blow, one she never recovered from. He never saw the smile on her face to which he had inherited again.
His father tried to remain strong-headed, but Soobin could see how every piece of him crumbled every other moon. The family dynamic shifted. The death of someone so small and precious made everyone in the family drift apart in different orbits. At last, his father died a year later. His family wasnât doing the best financially, Soobin was elbow deep into studies and despite his young age, trying to work shifts at local convenience stores. Life was hard, but his brain convinced him that the next to be would be a better day.
He didnât receive a big funeral or speeches, only the silence from his own wifeâs lips. Eyes too hollow to produce tears she was drained off years ago, Soobin cried what she hadnât cried. It wasnât even his body that had been buried in that casket so deep beneath the ground, it was just his arm. In reality, his body was mauled by a machine he went too close to, the company shut down the next day and the only thing he had gotten back was his arm.
His motherâ God, his mother. If she was bad, she stooped a level below worse. Barely leaving bed, her hair would tangle in knots and a foul smell would often rise from her bed. Her form was forever imprinted on the mattress, unmoving for most days unless Soobin dragged her out to the bathtub to carefully wash her hair with gentle fingers and barely any shampoo, a small luxury they could barely afford.
The same way you were doing to him now.
Faintly, from the sounds of tears and the heavy weight of expectations shedding from Soobin, the sound of light footsteps came down against the metal. The lights dimmed until all that was left was the glow that emanated from the floor and gentled as it reached the bunks due to the lack of proximity, concealing the two of you tangled in an embrace for the most part.
Yeonjun was sitting at the steps at the entrance of the carefully crafted âhaven.â It was an illusion of safetyâ guarding. Stronger players could easily crush that and all of you knew it. But for now, it was more than enough to conceal what you all had built together.
You held Soobin close until he was nothing but mere sniffles, your tracksuit jacket soaked from what had been years of built up pain carried on a pair of firm shoulders. It didnât matter how strong Soobin was, no one should carry all of this by themselves.
When he finally pulled away from your chest, it was like something squeezed your heart. Eyes red rimmed, face flushed. But despite it all, he looked more relieved than ever. Lighter.
"Thank you."
"You donât have anything to thank me for, Soobin." Your lips curled in a semblance of a smile, your hands never quite leaving their earlier positioning. "Itâs what.."
Your words died on your tongue, because what were you really? It dawned finally that despite the kisses and shared glances, the late night comforts, they didnât have a label to them. The time you barely had here never allowed it.
"Lovers do?" He spoke almost hopefully in a bated breath, air stuck halfway through his chest in a way he hadnât realized.
"Itâs what lovers do." You repeated, a laugh of something wrapped around disbelief and equal relief bursting through your chest as quiet as you could manage it. Love was a gentle, unexpected thing, you realized. Some part of you actually felt glad to join these games.
"When we get out of here," When, not if. Speaking as if the future had already been decided. "We can go anywhere we want. Iâll find a way to keep you as comfortable as possible, then, you can raise your daughter without ever worrying about struggling again."
"Our." You corrected, despite the earlier admission of being lovers, everything felt foreign.
"Iâ what?"
"Youâre more of a father than he could be." You forced down the nervousness that coated your voice, you couldnât tell whether he was shocked, pleased, confusedâ
"Youâre not kidding? Please donât joke around like this." Soobin pleaded, tethering himself to the idea of actually being what you had offered him.
"Iâm not kidding, Soobin." Heart hammering as strongly as it could against your chest, not sure where you became uncaring of the show of emotions you put on display. This was what whoever was in charge of this wanted, emotions and entertainment. But this wasnât for them.
It was for you. For Soobinâ for your daughter.
Your lips clashed onto his right afterwards, passionate in a way it felt suffocating as it was freeing. Warmth spread through you as his hand held your face tenderly, pulling you closer with a breath of contentment. His lips were soft, moving in a gentle rhythm against yours like they belonged against yours. He felt like home, even if it took you a few to really grasp that concept.
The air lacked, your lungs burned from the sheer exertion from holding the passion. And yet, neither of you wanted to pull away. His tongue prodded against yours lips, parting them as his tongue tangled onto yours. The idea that this might be the only and last time youâd have him made you cling to him a little tighter, like holding onto him would make the moment stop forever. Even if time didnât stop forever for you, youâd hold onto this and hope there would be more like these moments in the future.
Just not in the dark of a lobby room filled with other people, people whose souls were ugly with ignorance and broken by poverty and their own choices.
A moan, quiet but audible to both of your ears, escaped your lips. His hands were everywhere, trying to memorize the shape of you against him with the shortest amount of time. If Soobin was going to die, he wanted to die with the softness of your body and the dip of your waist forever etched into his memories. They slid down from your cheeks to your neck, all consuming but careful, exploring every inch of skin he could touch.
For the first time in months, you could feel the dampness already building in your panties. Your thighs pressed together as his fingers gripped the zipper of your tracksuit jacket, bringing it down quickly, a contrast to how patient he was trying to be. How patient he wanted to be with you.Â
His hands maneuvered you against the mattress, pressing you against the material that was once so uncomfortable that now felt like nothing. He settled carefully above you, trying to keep pressure away from your bump. Your lips finally parted from one another moments later, chest heaving from the air you both had been stealing from one another and bursting with emotions neither of you could fully convey.
His hands were already pushing your shirt up to rest just beneath your breasts, never fully off. If you were being watched, heâd only allow so much of you to be shown. His frame could easily cover most of you from certain anglesâ he wanted to keep it that way despite wanting to see all of you.
"Can I?.." he whispered, fingers hooking onto your sweatpants with a silent permission. As much as he wanted this, he wanted you to want him too. Even if his mind was telling him this might be the only and last time heâd have you.Â
"Yes." Your breathless voice managed out, wheezy and heavy managed out. As if to enjoy the moment as much as he could, he stripped you from your sweatpants and underwear and neatly folded them to the side.Â
"Can you stay quiet for me, sweetheart?" He murmured, already making a slow descent down your body.Â
You nodded, head jerking with desperation you could barely contain as his lips met the plush warmth of your thigh. His breath was hot and heavy against it, making you squirm.
"Words." He demanded softly, never quite touching you where you needed him.
Embarrassment flushed through your cheeks, not because you were ashamed of speaking, but because this was entirely new. You hadnât been treated like this with Sunghoon for all of the time you were together, and now Soobin was just sweeping you off of your feet with simple acts of love.
"I can, justâfuck, Soobin. Pleasâ" Your words were cut off abruptly with a sharp gasp, your hand quickly covered your mouth as Soobin finally pressed his tongue flat against your slit.
Your thighs quivered slightly, his tongue so good pressed against you that you could cry out of relief. Your other hand, the one that fisted the poorly made material of the blanket given up aside until you were white knuckled, drifted down to tangle in the matted mess, now a little more manageable thanks to your earlier ministrations of your hands in his hair.
"Youâre already so wet, fuck." He groaned against your folds, tongue parting them. He lapped at your pussy like it was the best meal he had in days, desperate and gentle all at once. Plump, soft lips wrapping around your clit and sucking as his armsâthose strong, firm arms that would hold both you and your daughter once you left these games, wrapped around both of your thighs, pressing you down against him further.
"Soobinâ" you gasped against your hand, pleasure exploding through your body. "Feels so good,"
"You taste so good," His tongue dragged down to your entrance, prodding as his nose bumped against your clit. Your heels dug firmer onto the mattress, biting your lip to conceal your noises. "Canât believe Iâve had a taste of you only now."
The soft, purple-ish lighting from the mingling, bright shining colors in the middle of the room gave you an almost ethereal view of his face. He was so pretty it was unfair. Your hands brushed his bangs away from his face, his eyes, bigger than usual from this angle, shone back to you with the sheer weight of devotion he proved everyday so effortlessly.
It made your chest ache.
His face buried impossibly further against your pussy, tongue dragging back up as one of his hands left the plush curve of your inner thigh. His eyes met yours once again, this time watching for any discomfort as his middle finger pushed into you slowly.
You let out a silent cry, struggling to stay quiet. Whether it was from the fact his fingers alone were big or because you hadnât allowed yourself the simple act of being touched by someone in months was the reason for you being so sensitive, you didnât know. But you knew it felt good despite the initial burn.
He slowly inserted another finger next, pumping in and out of you and stretching you open tenderly as he eased the discomfort through circles and sucks at your clit. It left you dizzy, the pain bending to give way to pleasure you denied for so long.
"Iâm so close, Soobin. Fuckâ" You whimpered, hips rutting down to the best of their abilities as his tongue doubled down in effort. The all-consuming feeling of your orgasm built up in coils inside your stomach, stretched impossibly tight as your thighs clenched around his head. Quiet moans now being muffled in a half-assed way by your hands left you in strings, singing in pleasure to Soobinâs eager ears.
One last suck at your clit, and you completely unraveled beneath him. Back arching off of the mattress, eyes pressing closed, anything to even out the overwhelming pleasure. Soobin lapped up your release eagerly, helping you ride out your orgasm until you were boneless against the mattress. Then, only then, did he finally pull away from your cunt.
His chin was completely drenched with your juices. Leaving his lips moist as his hair mused once more. "Good?" He murmured with a contented, dumb smile.Â
"More than good." You managed out once you finally regained a firmer grip onto reality once again. His hands brushed the curve of your stomach, kissing in an almost worshipful way. His eyes wet, excited like a little kid on Christmas eve.
"Hey, baby." He mumbled, fingers trailing circles absentmindedly along your skin. "Iâm here now, okay? I wonât ever leave you or your mama."
Your breath became shaky, not sure which part of you was throbbing the hardest at his words. He was so meaningful, taking on a responsibility that wasnât his to bear but he made it his own since he saw you. You wanted him. Not just now, but for the rest of your life. Until the world became as dull and gray as the strands of your hair, until your heart gave its final beat.Â
"Iâm excited to meet you. So be good to her, okay? Sheâs trying really hard for you." One last kiss against your skin that was already touched through its whole expanse by his curious hands and lips, and he was already hovering above you again.
When your lips met, it gave you hope. It was slightly more desperate, harder, like he couldnât hold back anymore. You didnât want him to, you wanted everything he had to offer and more. You closed your eyes, tasting yourself on his tongue as he moaned between shaking lips. All you felt was him, everywhere and unbelievably never enough.
"Do you have a safeword you use?" He asked between kisses, thoughtful as he had always been.
"No."Â
Quite frankly, you never considered the use of one before. You found it unnecessaryâ a minor thing you never cared for. Not until Soobin made you care and crave it.
Being loved by him meant having gentle, small things ingrained into you that you would slowly crave.
"Velvet," he finally pulled away, hands parting your thighs to settle between them. "If you want me to stop at all, just say it, and Iâll stop."
You nodded, breathless by his sheer consideration. Without another moment to spare, his pants slid down his legs, boxers coming off next, a wet patch right at the hardened crotch. You couldnât help the way your eyes widened at the sight of him.
He was big, flushed red and leaking in a way that made you nearly salivate. How could someone be carved out and sculpted so perfectly?
"If anything at allâ" he started, worry coating his voice. Not only because he didnât want to hurt you, since he was aware he was bigger than most people in all aspects, but because he didnât want to hurt the baby.
"Soobin, please. Iâll be fine, I promise." You whined, aching to have him inside of you already. "I need you."
His words died right on his throat, fully taking his time to catch the view of you beneath him. Eyes hazy and wanting with pleasure, legs parted open just for him, hair spread around your pillow, flushed and pliant just for him.
Slowly, almost reverently, he pressed his tip against your entrance. One of his hands held the back of one of your thighs for balance, pushing in with a groan muffled by his teeth biting the bottom of his lip.
You gasped, the stretch burned more than you had initially expected. Sensitivity mixed with pain with an underlying sense of pleasure, heavy enough that it made tears sting your eyes, your hands scrambling to grip anywhere. His shoulders, his bicepsâ every firm part of him. He moved slowly, ducking down to press kiss at your neck as your head tipped back to allow him space.
"Youâre doing so good, taking me so well." He whispered through hisses, hitches of his own voice. "My sweet girl, Iâll take such good care of you."
Your mind blanked as his fingers met your clit in circles, easing away some of the tension until he bottomed out. You felt incredibly full, his dick filling parts of you that no one has ever reached and it was so overwhelming in the best way.
Soobin let out a breath he wasnât aware he had been lacking, taking a moment to let you adjust in silence.Â
"Please," You whimpered, breathy against his ear. He nodded, compliant as he moved in shallow, experimental thrusts.Â
"Youâre so good for me, sweetheart." He groaned, pulling out until his tip was the only thing left in youâ before pushing in. It knocked wind from your lungs, a breathy whine leaving your lips. "When we get out of here, Iâll give you such a good life. Okay?" He whispered, tender words and promises that were bound to break your bones with their heaviness.Â
"Me, you, our baby. Iâll make you the happiest one alive, maybe even put a ring on your finger eventually. Would you like that, hm?" You clenched tight around him, staring at his eyes as if he hung the stars in the sky just for you. And in a way, he had. Even if they werenât literal stars.
"Yesâ fuck, I want that." You cried, legs wrapping around the firm line of his waist as you felt another orgasm build up. "All of you, please."
You were blabbering, drunk in your moans that just kept rising. Soobinâs lips met yours desperately, partly to drown out your noises but also to silence his own. "Then youâll have it. That, and me." He promised, another promise thrown to the pile as his thrusts grew faster, the wet smack of skin making you two concealing your noises futile.
Fuck it, you thought. Let them all hear.Â
With your heart inside your throat, you spasmed around him. Finding your release in the safe haven of his lips that were almost like a secret salvation, something meant just for you.
Soobinâs breath was ragged, fast. He kept his ears open, trying to hear any sign of you saying the safewordâ to push him away, but all you could do was hold him tight and clench impossibly tight in spasms around him, drunk and carried away by pleasure. "Shit, shit. Youâre so tightâBaby, where do you want me?"
Despite his own desperate urge to cum, he still made sure it all wrapped around what you wanted.
"Inside." You whined, his name leaving your lips in strings of what were a silent prayer.
With a final thrust, he finally came after a series of stuttering thrusts. His head pressed against your shoulder, nuzzling your neck next as he inhaled the scent of you beneath all of that grime and death. Catching his breath.
"I love you." He pressed a kiss against your neck, followed by many others until he could see your face. Blissed out in pleasure, finally relaxed and his. "So, so much."
Slowly, he pulled out of you. Sliding his shirt off and using water from the water bottles they had given you to clean you up to the best of his abilities. After dressing you, only then did he collapse next to you with a satisfied smile.
"I want her name to be Eun-seo." You whispered, half-asleep as you pressed as close as possible to him as you could. You felt Soobin tense, processing your words. "If youâre okay with it."
As the tension slowly drained from him, his expression morphed from disbelief to a love so unbearable you were sure both of you would drown in it. He then laughed, the kind of carefree laughter that felt almost as if you werenât amidst a death game.Â
"Iâd love that." He pressed his lips against the top of your head, arm draping over your waist as the other caressed your stomach. The baby wasnât his biologically, but it didnât make her anything less than his daughter, too. "L/N Eun-seo, or Choi?"
"Choi has a nice ring to it.." you smiled, sighing warmly against the heated skin of his neck. "We can keep the Choi."
"Choi Eun-seo.." Same name, completely different lives and fates. His chest twisted, not in pain, but in something far more freeing. "Mommy and daddy already love you."Â
That night, you slept more at ease than you had any other nights. Wrapped around the person you least expected to love.
THE NEXT MORNING shattered the illusion of complete safety. No one, surprisingly, had attacked anyone. But the presence of the forks were still there, still a threat. It was only a matter of time until something burst in order for the attacks to start. The violins from the rising alarm rang in your ears, causing you to finally rise. Anxiety was easy to settle over your body, feet moving because they had to go towards the breakfast line. You managed to eat both offered sweet breads, two because Soobin was still hellbent on giving you his food. You hadnât seen Beomgyu earlier that day, nor Yeonjun, but you assumed as the games started, theyâd resurface.
You hadnât seen Taehyun, either. But you knew he was smart. And if he was against you, then just how easily could he kill you?
You made your way up the steps despite the slight tension in your legs, the pathway was always silent. But now, it was heavy with tension, because sides were more distinct and segregated than theyâd ever been. The design of this place was already making you sick, but you were all sadly stuck here because of the choice of many.
The room you stepped in wasnât colorful, not like the others. It was just a slight glimpse, though. The place was too cramped to even properly hold up a fight. If this was about entertainment, then all of you would die in a pretty damn boring way. Nevertheless, the walls were painted pitch black. The yellow that was the floor was a harsh contrast, making the colors clash. You walked in through a knife shaped wall, a Gumball dispenser stood amidst it. Red balls and blue ones blended together, mixing with the colors of your patches. Though, this time, the patches werenât chosen. They were randomly assorted.Â
It was plain in a way that didnât catch much attention, maybe the point was to seem underwhelming. But it didnât do much to your heart that had been beating in palpitations up the steps, now racing further.
"Welcome to your fourth game. This game will be played in two teams, but before we start the game, you will be divided in said teams. Please, politely take turns drawing a ball from the gumball dispenser ahead of you."
Lines were formed, you stood right in front of Soobin as person per person drew a ball. Some blue, some red. You werenât aware of the meaning yet, but you knew that it couldnât be good. Still, you couldnât match a small clue to a game from your childhood.
When it was your turn, you twisted the cold metal handle, watching as the balls shuffled and one dropped with a light sound. Your hand still rested above your stomachâ a habit you caught that felt like reassurance now.
Red.
You examined it for a moment too long, eyes narrowing at it as if it was something more dangerous. Then, you stepped to the side. Soobin was nextâ blue. His eyes didnât hesitate to meet yours, your hand tightened around the ball you were holding. There was no way this would end up well.
"What are we going to do?" You whispered, trying to hold back the panic rising within your voice. "This canât be good."
"Itâll be fine, weâll find a way." Soobin reassured, looking at whoever was next. Player 036, Wonhee. He remembered her from mingle and the bathroom, though now she looked far more worn down than ever. These games were clearly getting to her. She was red.
"See? Youâre not entirely alone. Donât worry so much, especially because we donât even know what game it is."
Once everyone was sorted out in groups, you stood apart by the color of the balls you had gotten.Â
"The game you will be playing is hide and seek. The blue team must either find the exit and escape within 30 minutes, or stay hidden from the red team until the time is up."
How the hell were you going to kill each other playing hide and seek? Your mind thought about options, one far worse than the other. All of them still meant you were against Soobin.
"What about the taggers? We just need to find the hiders and thatâs it?" Wonhee questioned, the first time you had heard her voice since mingle. She looked alone.
Has she lost everyone?
You felt bad, but you couldnât pity her. If you did, it would be exploited by anyone or the higher ups in this game.
"The red team, the taggers, must find members of the blue team and kill them within thirty minutes." The guard instructed, gasps rising within the room.
Your blood ran cold. You stood a moment too long frozen hoping that you, despite the clear âfairnessâ of the rules amongst players, wouldnât have to kill Soobin. You didnât even look at him. Couldnât.
You didnât want to see him telling you it was okay, because it wasnât.
"And what happens if you donât kill?" Your voice came out, raspy and nervous.Â
"If you fail to kill any opposing players? you will be eliminated."Â
The blue team had been giving boxes, those kinds where you pull the side latch. It was big, looked promising, however the red teamâ your team, hadnât received anything. As much as you didnât want to play by the rules of this game, you didnât want to play this unfairly, either.
"What is this?" You watched from the corner of your eye as player 060 held up a key, compared to your offered knives, this seemed unfair. And almost everyone was in the blue team, at least, who you knew. Yeonjun and Beomgyu. They were standing side by side in blue vests with their player number attached to the middle of their chests. Easier to call out their numbers if they were eliminated rather than actually checking their bodies under the vest.
"You have been given keys to doors in the arena, to which can be used to go through doors. But once a door is unlocked, it cannot be relocked."
"So they can hide somewhere and use their keys to escape? They have it much easier!" Someone complained, a person from red. He wasnât wrongâ plus, finding people while being pregnant as a tagger left you at a disadvantage. You couldnât exactly chase after hiders with bare hands without them killing you first.
"On top of that, we have to kill people with just our hands." Another player agreed, the murmurs of complaint filling the room in a choir.Â
"Thatâs right. Itâs not like they will just roll over and ask us to kill them." Sunghoon, who had been standing a few rows behind you, boomed through all the noise. "How do you expect us to kill someone with just our hands?"
"We understand your concerns, thatâs why we have prepared a small gift for the red team as well."
In front of you, a circle guard had already started to hand out boxes. To each side, there was a color. You grabbed your own fingers hesitating against the side latch of the box to find the blade of a knife, it was a contrast to what people from the continuing side acquired, theirs being a key.
The knife gleamed practically menacingly under the bright, white lighting that reflected across the four expanses of the wall. It was sharpened, made to build and dig into skin to cut it open. The handle was a shade of shock pink fading into slight red, adorned by spirals of blue that wrapped around it. Nearing the blade, a design almost akin to a birdâs wings wrapped around both sides of the bottom of the blade, the middle being a light pink arrow.
It was beautiful, you couldnât lie. But one of the laws in nature meant that if itâs beautiful, it could be deadly.
That applied to this.
You gripped the handle of your blade as you held it up, eyes narrowing as you examined it. Surely, it was built to create damage without mercy. It was just up to the red team players whether they would be merciful or kill to torture.
Entertainment was entertainment one way or another.
"The red team can use knives to attack the blue team, however, the members from the red team are strictly forbidden from attacking each other." The square guard then announced, desperation dawning onto the faces of the hiders almost immediately.
They had a cruel way of making you understand that no matter how hard you tried, you would have to kill to survive. The blood splattered couldnât just be done by the guards, you had to betray indirectly, manipulate to take what you needed and leave without a trace before they kill you. The squelch of blood wasnât limited to just the guns or machinery the guards in this facility carried around so proudly.
"Shouldnât you give us a shield or something?! You give them knives and expect us to justârun around without a weapon?"
"I understand your concerns. However, be aware you can use the key to open a door and escape." The guard reminded the uneasy hiders. While they could open doors, youâd be the one getting screwed over by having to run after players to âtagâ and kill them.
"Thatâs right, just hide somewhere and youâll be fine!" Someone counter argued, not out of pity, however. It was mocking, almost superior. You hated how the initial hope that you all clung to when the games started faded onto a bloodthirsty mess of mannerisms the game made you built for survival.
"Before we start the game, you may switch roles with someone on the opposing team."Â
Your head finally snapped towards Soobin, so quickly you were sure you could hear a bone pop and pull from the sudden movement, ringing in your ears. He was still holding up his key, admiring or analyzing it, you werenât sure which. But you could practically see the gears in his head turning.
"You can swap your items and vests upon mutual agreement, but once the game starts, removing or trading your vests will be completely forbidden and will result in the elimination of the players from both parties that participated in the ordeal." The guard took a pause, whether the guard was watching how the information sank to see the desperation in the face of players or to just bask in it, you werenât sure. "Please make your choice carefully."
Slowly but surely, the players from the blue team came like a force towards the red team players. Some begged to swap, some used threatening and manipulation. It was useless, a knife could always break the string of words, it didnât matter whether the string was soft or harsh, a string is still a string.
"Partner up with me." Your eyes flicker up to SUNGHOON, pinching your brows together as he held up the blade right next to his head as if it made the situation any better.
"This isnât a team game. I donât need help, least of all yours." You replied bitterly, almost as bitter as the bile that you forced down each day. The feeling acrid and strong. "I donât trust you, Sunghoon. Mind your own business, I can take care of myself."
It was infuriating. Sunghoon seemed to try to breach through your already built life without him like he hadnât done anything, like this wasnât his fault as much as it was yours. You wouldnât let him in again, not now. Especially not now. You turned away before he could say another word, eyes scanning the clumped groups of players for Soobin.
"But you should. ListenâIâll make sure you guarantee a kill, I know you wonât be able to do anything with that knife." He interrupted, gripping your wrist and positioning himself in front of you.Â
"Donât act like you know everything about me."
"Maybe I donât, but I do know one thing, Y/N." He paused, seriousness finally settling onto his face in an almost eerie way. "You canât kill anyone. Theyâll kill you before you kill them."
You remained silent, but you knew he was right. You wouldnât be able to bear the possibility of blood staining your hands. While these people werenât innocent by their actions, they were still mostly unaware peopleâpeople that came here for an opportunity at life innocently and now had to kill or be killed by a sick, carefully constructed system.
"Give me the knife." His hand reached towards the knife, your eyes wary and wide as you pulled the knife further backwards so he wouldnât grab it. "Iâll take someone out as quickly as I can, and then Iâll find someone for you. Iâll protect you and the baby, I promise."
You snort, head tilting as you bit your lip in actual contempt. You wouldnât give in, that was for sure. If anything, you were going to swap with Soobin. What you couldnât place, though. The missing piece of the puzzle was why Sunghoon seemed to care now and just why at this moment.
He wanted your money.
You glanced at the knife on your side, white knuckles holding it so strongly you were sure if it had been anything else rather than the wooden foundation of the handle, it would have been snapped underneath the pressure force.
"I donât need your help." You finally declare, pushing past him as you bumped into his shoulder with a little more force than necessary. He doesnât push, he feels moreover disappointed than willing to chase after you. What was new?
You find the mop of blonde hair towering above the sea of black ones soon after, standing next to Yeonjun and Beomgyu in a circle. Their voices were hushed, almost strategic. You felt for once, out of place. Your red vest was a threatening contrast to their passive, blue ones.Â
"Y/N.." Yeonjun caught your eyes first, trailing down to the vest you wore and the weapon you wielded. You didnât look out of place because you were wearing red, but you looked out of place because you were someone who couldnât kill. Someone who tried to cling to her morals as much as possible.
Red didnât suit you. It never did. This was just another reminder of why you rarely, or for matter of fact, almost never wore something red.
"Swap with me." You announced to the groupâ anyone willing to take it. You were placing your knife carefully on top of the box before extending it towards them, who exchanged a glance.
"Iâll do it. Give me the knife." Beomgyuâs voice was almost monotonous, not necessarily looking into your eyes. No, he was looking at Taehyun. Who was talking to Sunghoon. An alliance, perhaps. The alliance you didnât give Sunghoon the pleasure of.
"No, Iâll do it." A sharp intake of breath left Soobin, already reaching for the box. With the look Beomgyu was giving Taehyun, this couldnât be good at all. He was practically fuming at the thought of Taehyun, but Taehyun was red. Beomgyu would end up in a seriously stupid predicament if you gave him the knife. He was already handing you the box with his key and his vest, eyes downcast towards it as if it would bite.Â
"Iâll find all of you once I tag someone," tag, not kill. The word killing sounded too grim for this moment, he didnât want to think about killing someone. Soobin ran a hand through his hair, distressed, but not displeased. Yeonjun was the most capable of doing this, considering he was a sergeant prior to this. But if there was anyone better to protect you, and to keep Beomgyu in line, it would be him. "You hide. Stay put, and Iâll come."
You exchanged your vests, both roles feeling more adaptable to but still frightening. Both ways would be a brutal way to die.Â
You were tense as you watched other interactions from other players, some people who voted to continue the games unfortunately ended up on the blue team. Desperation was reeking out of them far more than the foul smell everyone acquired. Those âweakerâ people from the red team, people who chose to go against the games, often refused to exchange gifts.
How does it feel to be below now, huh? The weird sense of satisfaction poked at you, but just as quickly as it had arrived, it left.
"The game will begin momentarily!" The robotic voice announced, you shifted from one foot to another, closer to Yeonjun and Beomgyu. The knife bore a heavy weight on Soobinâs hand, seriousness coating his expression and a sick feeling of understanding in his eyes as he twirled it in his hand. You hoped heâd be able to kill someone. As much as the thought made your stomach churn, it was the only way to have him come back to you.
"Blue team, please get ready to enter the arena."
Your eyes flickered up towards the door that was shaped like a lock this time, shoulders hunching as you moved alongside frightened and shaking hiders who would probably play sitting duck hiding behind doors that couldnât be locked once opened.Â
Your key jingled and swished around with every step of your feet, the metal cold and with a key that felt like heavy weight. If you maybe kept moving, unlocking doors, then maybe youâd have a shot without running. Youâd just have to go door by door.
The bright yellow corridor you all walked through in a cramped crowd. It was almost as bright as the yellow sun, thanks to the lights that sharply shone and hit your eyes from the low ceiling above your heads. Warmth came from the brush of bodies that soon wouldnât be warm anymore.
Then, the doors opened. Your eyes shone like the stars plastered on the ceiling, it was huge. Huge like a maze. The arena looked like a neighborhood, almost like the neighborhood your foster parents raised you in whenever dusk fell and you were still out there running around trying to get a proper taste of childhood in its dying moments.
The walls, more than halfway up, were made out of bricks. The way they followed wasnât even, sometimes they followed a downwards slope to mimic the visual of steps you often had to follow down your house. Light grey, light yellow.
The ground made a shuffling sound of rocks, it wasnât grainy, dusty as the particles flew around the light grey rocky material with every step, coating your blood stained shoes. The ceiling shone with stars of every size, but also every possible design. They were a shade lighter than the yellow of the hallway you had just passer, a contrast to the various shades of blue that was the background, the one that also was painted in the walls where the bricks didnât cover. Houses were painted in these expanses, mirroring how kids would play in neighborhoods late at night.
Parents would often warn their kids of the dangers of staying out so late and going to play, and while most kids paid to mind and turned out well, these same kids now were playing with others who represented the danger their parents warned against.
"Shit," you mumbled, hand reaching up to steady yourself against the light post that you faced yourself with a few steps away from the entrance. It was made out of real wood, nostalgic. It didnât give you splinters like the old ones nearby your foster house, but it was similar enough. The orange lights were enough. Judging by the tangle of wires that spread through the immense hallways of the arena that seemed endless, there were more of these.
"The taggers will enter in two minutes."
"Listen everyone. Letâs not hide and wait like sitting ducks! Whoever finds the exit first will shout and let everyone know!" You recognized the player as player 100, unsure of his name. He was one of the players who were so sure theyâd survive these games with the upper hand, you wondered how he felt now. Maybe he finally understood why all of you wanted to leave.
"Good idea! Letâs help each other and thenâthen we get out of here alive!"Â
It was a stupid idea. You, Yeonjun, and Beomgyu opted for not wasting time as you quickly vanished within one of the halls. Arguing was futile when no one would want to listen, desperate for an exit. But also because you didnât know how grand this place was, no one in their right mind would be able to reach the ears of every player and even if they did, it was impossible to find an exit within two minutes and various locked doors. And if you did find an exit, it was more likely to be when the taggers came to find the hiders. No one would care for the survival of other players.
âHide, hide, itâs time to play. Donât let your hair give you away.â
You grimaced at the eerie voice of a child playing through the speakers, feet shuffling to move quicker to keep up with the guys who walked on either side of you. You were limping, uncomfortable as you placed one hand over your bump, the other gripped Yeonjunâs wrist.
âHide, hide, itâs time to play. Donât let your clothes give you away.â
Some of the areas were dimmer than the others, they really did think everything out.Â
"Come on, be careful." Yeonjunâs hand wrapped around yours, carefully leading you up the steps as a way too concentrated, may-haps paranoid, Beomgyu looked from side to side before climbing despite the fact there were no taggers yet.
Together, you went up the steps. You moved in silent save for the sound of your steps against the floor, speaking too much could be deadly. Your breath was shaky, you tried to stifle it to the best of your abilities.
The speakers let out a loud, high buzzing noise. You didnât flinch, neither of you did. You just kept moving because you knew what this meant. The taggers were finally inside the arena, now it was about survival for thirty minutes unless you found a door.
Once on a higher level platform, at least you thought it was by logic, though it didnât apply to these games most times.. Yeonjun took the lead. Leaning over every corner to examine and watch out for players as Beomgyu kept both of his hands on your left arm. A steady presence despite it all.
"Letâs go." He murmured, facing one of the dark green shaded doors. He quickly reached for his key, the one that was dangling from the metal wrapped around his neck loosely, swinging around in front of his chest. He fumbled with the lock, but it didnât open. The key didnât fit.
Fuck. Of course theyâd make it more complicated, just having the key to any door was far too easy for the hiders and more of a pain towards the taggers.
Yeonjunâs head quickly turned from the triangle shaped lock, landing onto you and Beomgyu. "Can I take a look?" He gestured towards both of your keys, with your nod, he lifted your key up to examine the shape. A triangle. "This is the oneâcan I borrow it?"
You nodded, a quick movement of your head to spare your words to not give your hiding spot away as you slid off the metal necklace around your neck to give Yeonjun the key. It fit perfectly, as expected. Once twisted, the door made a sound signaling it had been opened, only for it to make a sharper sound as Yeonjun pushed it open.Â
He smiled, relief flooding through every feature as he stepped a bit more within the room. You let your hand press against the rough wall for balance, moving inside. The room was a sharp contrast to the offered starry night outside, a mix of pinks, pale blues, yellows and rainbows with shapes to decorate the walls. The next door in front of you didnât open with neither keys.
"Beomgyu, let me see yours." His hands slid off the necklace quickly, not a single moment to waste hesitating as he shoved his key inside Yeonjunâs open palm.Â
"What is it?" You finally spoke up, curiosity tinging your voice at how Yeonjun seemed to manage this out so easily.
"Each door has a keyhole in a different shape, I think there are threeâ like the three guards we see. Circle, triangle, and square." His hands moved around as he explained, sometimes games that werenât meant to be played as groups were made easier when you did. Hide and seek was often a person by themselves, but the old rules surely didnât apply to this game. "We have all three. Mines is a circle, yours is a triangle, and Beomgyuâs is a square."
"We make a great team, this proves it." Yeonjun added, smiling. You couldnât help but smile alongâeyes sparkling. You three had a better shot of surviving this.
"We do, we really do. I have known since the pentathlon." Beomgyu agreed, fingers curling around Yeonjunâs hand to close his palm around the three keys he held. "In that case, you should be the one holding our keys, Yeonjun-ah. Weâll be able to more efficiently that way, you wonât have to keep stopping every now and then to reach for our keys."
"Is it really okay with all of you?"Â
"Yeah, yeah. Go ahead." Your eyes focused on the lock, satisfaction bursting within you as the door opened with Beomgyuâs key. For the first few steps you took forward together, it was silent. But the true nature of this game started to show with one sharp, feminine scream. You halted, head jerking upwards as you looked for the source of the scream, feeling uneasy.
"Player 154, eliminated!â
Soon, it wasnât just one. Various screams of agony and pleas filled your ears. Beomgyu tugged along your arm, jaw setting tighter as he forced himself to move forward. "Come on, we have to go. Canât stay unmoving."
You opened and closed doors more often than not, five minutes within the gameâyou noted as one of the clocks offered up in the walls counted down from thirty. Footsteps of running players would often come near, enough for all of you to press against the wall. Tagger or hider, you wouldnât try your luck. Both sides included people who lost their minds in order to try to survive.
A gurgling scream came next as you three forced your bodies away from the wall, Yeonjunâs arm now interlinking with yours like Beomgyuâs arm already had been. "We have to run."
No words were exchanged, your breath heaved loudly despite your best efforts to remain silent. Feet thudding against the floor in unison, enough to make your heart move wrongly inside your chest with every beat. The sounds were louder in the silence, drumming against your ears.Â
"Player 089, eliminated!â
Yeonjun only looked back once, head peeking against the curve of a wall to see a tagger running in the background. Blood going cold, he quickly ushered you and Beomgyu to move forward, only to be met with a tagger right in front of you.
Your eyes locked with him. The world tilted in its axis as your lungs forgot to produce air for the moment you stood there longer than you should have stood. Prey and predator, you snapped out of that initial haze as Beomgyuâs moving feet hurled you and Yeonjun along the way.
"Come on!" He shouted. Your feet burned, you couldnât breathe properly as you moved solely by being dragged. You got exhausted quickly, but despite how much your body screamed at you to stop running, begging for you to sit down and rest, you would just become an easy kill.
"Player 333, pass."
Of course Sunghoon would easily pass this game, he had no trouble doing things many would hesitate to do, especially when it came to himself. You learned it the hard wayâhe used people and then discarded them like filthy trash when they were no longer useful, once they no longer provided him with anything good.
Yeonjunâs hand was firm and ushering on your back, opting to stay behind the both of you for protection and better support to push you forward. You were met with a staircase, adrenaline pumping through your veins as the dim exit welcomed your vision, unlocked.
Beomgyu glanced at you once, letting go of your arm as he ran up the stairs with huffing breaths. Yeonjun grabbed your hand now instead, you followed, feet taking you as fast as you could up the steps. You reached for your stomach instead of the wall, making sure she was here instead of protecting yourself from any injuries.
The pain that burst through your body was enough to make a sob claw at your throat. It only didnât come out because the force to which your ankle twisted at knocked any possible reaction out of you, your body thudding down the steps with the sound akin to one of a wounded animal. You groaned in pain, lying on your side unmoving. Your brain struggled to catch up, ears ringing as if someone had pressed your head underwater. You felt dizzy, breathing hurt, almost as if someone had sharply punched you in the ribs.
Iâm going to die, was all you managed to think as your eyes filled with tears. The pain was too great, overwhelming every sense as you curled within yourself.
"Y/N!" Beomgyu shouted, following down the steps in a speed he wasnât aware he was capable of. He dropped to his knees in front of you, the tagger soon reaching your view.
Yeonjun stepped in front of you and Beomgyu, hands out as if he was ready to take the tagger holding a knife in a hand to hand combat.Â
"Step aside." He hissed, he was just as scared and desperate as you were. "I just need to kill that damn bitch." His voice shook with emotionâ uneven and wavering like the waves in the beach, whether it was sadness or rage that coated it, you werenât sure.
Your head fell back, tears falling down your cheeks as you made a feeble attempt at trying to roll your ankle. A sharp pain, sharper than the already throbbing one, shot up through your body and you stopped trying. Out of instinct, you pushed yourself back against the wall, feeling more useless and helpless than youâd ever felt in your whole life.
"Hey, Y/N. Look at me. Weâll be fine, okay?" Beomgyu tried to comfort you despite the fear in his voice, his eyes mirroring yours in shades of panic and terror. One arm of his wrapped around you, giving support, as his other hand forced your head to look at him.
He looked different. Almost like an animalâan actual prey. His eyes, wide and startled, met yours in a pathetic attempt of reassurance. "Donât look at him. Look at me. Youâre fine."
You couldnât breathe, only gulp fractions of air as you weakly nodded.Â
"Or give me the pretty boy." The tagger pointed his sharp blade forward, you knew how sharp that blade was. You had tested it yourself before exchanging your box with Soobinâs. It was a brutal way to die if your killer wasnât merciful.
Yeonjunâs head slowly turned towards you and Beomgyu, both cornered against the wall like it would swallow you whole and keep you away from the threat.Â
You didnât speak, a silent communication spoken through your eyes. As terrified as you were, you didnât want Yeonjun to get hurt. Please, you mentally begged, lip wobbling. Donât do this.
Yeonjun turned his head towards the tagger, something protective taking a hold of his body as he tucked all the three keys hanging from his neck inside of his tracksuit jacket. His fists raised, defiance but also confidence emanated from his body, something darker shifting inside his eyes. What was a knife compared to a gun? A knife was nothing when you managed guns and led people. Dealing with high pressure moments was part of being a sergeant.
With a groan and ferocity, the red vested man swung the knife towards Yeonjun with a sharp sound, as if the wind itself had slashed under the merciless blade. Yeonjun stumbled backwards, Yeonjun pressed him against the wall, body jerking back at another swing of the blade. Player 224âs mouth was twisted in an animalistic way, bloodthirsty as he raised the knife to strike.
Yeonjunâs hand clamped around his wrist, spinning around with him as if it were a dance before using his body to press him against the wall again. Groans left both sides, desperation and rage with every move. They moved quickly, too fast for your eyes to follow. Yeonjun turned his body around, never letting go of the hand that held the knife as his back pressed against the playerâs front, twisting his arm as he growled in pain.Â
While they fought, Beomgyuâs arms wrapped around your torso. "We have to get out of here, give Yeonjun space." he ushered despite your shaking head, you were in no place to make decisions. He dragged you carefully to the bottom of the steps, your wrist limply dragging against the floor and scraping your skin as you bit your lip hard enough you could taste the metallic tang of blood coating your tastebuds.
Yeonjunâs elbow met the bones of the guyâs face three times, forcing his arm downwards so strongly it was sure to snap one of his tendons. He barely allowed himself a gulp of air, body moving on muscle memory. A pained groan left him as hands gripped his hair, eyes locked on the knife and the way it shifted to point upwards.
"Fuck!" The guy screamed hoarsely, with an opening, both of his hands slipped below two spots in his arm, swinging the guy up and above his head until he hit the ground. His knee hit the ground next to his head, forcing the knife out of his hands as Yeonjun quickly lifted his hand to strike.
"Waitâ wait, no!" He pleaded, struggling as he weakly lifted up his hand to curl around Yeonjunâs wrist, attempting to not get stabbed by his own weapon. A sharp growl and strings of groans left Yeonjunâs throat, ricocheting off of the walls as both of his hands held the handle of the knife as he used every bit of his strength to push the knife down. He only stopped when he heard the squelch of blood, the knife tearing the skin of his chest until the player remained unmoving, mouth open in a silent scream and eyes glossy.
"Player 224, eliminated!â
You were trembling, sat on the third step as you tried your best to not pay attention to the pain. Beomgyuâs hands were shakily holding your own, he had stopped attempting to drag you up the steps once your expression became too filled with pain. Yeonjun breathed in relief, a hand over his chest as he tucked the stolen knife inside his pocket with the blade facing upwards in order to not cut himself.
"Let me take a look." He whispered, hands almost reverent and as careful as they could be rolled up the fabric of your pants. You whimpered at the contact, eyes locked with your wound.
It was ugly. There was no way you hadnât busted your ankle. It already had taken a shade of unnatural purple, mingling with the angry red of irritation from your skin. "Can you walk?"
Your mind flickered back to the guy back in red light green light. His ankle was torn far worse than yours. Was this how he felt? Or was this just a fraction of what he was feeling moments before he died?Â
You couldnât walk. At least not as effectively as before, you would just bring them down. But you nodded, knowing neither Beomgyu nor Yeonjun would leave you behind.
"Letâs go, then. Anyone who heard us will come this way."Â Quickly, you fell into a slower pace as Yeonjun wrapped his arms around yours. Beomgyu and him exchanged a glance, counting to three before lifting you to your feet. The pain never ceased, it just worsened as your body weight put pressure onto it. You forced all the sobs wrapping like wire around your throat down, gasping as you stepped up the stairs.
"Careful, donât hurt yourself." Beomgyu ushered, being as quick as he could manage while looking behind constantly. Just in case.
Yeonjun opened another door as quickly as he could manage, Beomgyu shut it behind as you limped your way inside. It became an unspoken routine, not ideal but necessary to survive. Whatever worked, you followed.
"Player 374, pass."
Through the pain, as the familiar voice announced Soobinâs name, you couldnât help but smile. You met Beomgyuâs eyes, who looked more relieved than anything. Soobin did it. It didnât take too longâ he would just have to come find all of you now. "He did it." You whispered, voice cracking at places but still unbelievably glad.
"Heâll come find us now." Beomgyu grinned, glancing at Yeonjun who had already rushed to open the door in front of the wall to which all of you pressed up against once no footsteps were audible anymore.Â
"Try to not get caught up on it, itâll be hard to find us. This place is big." Yeonjun reached for you, already bringing both you and Beomgyu towards your door.
"He promised me." You argued quickly, fierce. Despite all the pain you felt, despite the dread and sick fear that made you feel like not moving, you still trusted Soobin more than anything. Anyone could see that.
"Player 198, eliminated!"
Trust as big as this was hard to come across in a game where people had to kill one another to survive.
Without further arguing, Yeonjun pursed his lips and nodded. You moved slowly, body barely able to push forward had it not been for the support of other two solid ones. Your ruined ankle dragged behind you, a heavy weight you couldnât control.Â
A sickening scream reached nearby, all of you stopped. Yeonjun was already searching for the nearest door, rushing to open it for a safe place to stay for a little while.
"Hang in there, weâre almost there." Beomgyu reassured, but neither of you knew how far away the exit was or how much time there really was left.Â
"This way." Yeonjun was back at your side as the door clinked open. The room inside was themed like the ocean, walls painted in lighter shades of mixing blues. Jellyfishes were plastered against the wall out of paper, fishes too. It was beautiful, safe enough to stay. No other doors connected to this room, meaning the only exit you had to guard as the one you came through.
You limped your way inside the room, hitting the floor as you sat down against the wall, unable to hold back your pained whimpers by now.Â
"Let me look." He mumbled, sliding off your shoe. So little time had passed, and yet your ankle worsened. From the purple and red mingling tones, it started to swell up. It wasnât something that would heal quickly.Â
"Is it sprained?" Beomgyu asked breathlessly, eyes locked onto the wound.
"Her ankle might be fractured, she shouldnât walk on it." Yeonjun sighed, shaking his head. Despite his initial reluctance, he was glad he brought the knife from the other player with him. "For now, letâs just hide in here and see how things go."
You shook your head, forcing it away from the wall where it had tipped against. Sweat coated your face, hair clinging to your forehead. "Donât do that just for me, Iâll stay here alone. Iâm just going to hold all of you back, go and find the exit and leave."Â
Beomgyu shook his head, gripping your arm just a bit tighter. He refused to let anyone else die. "We promised Soobin weâd take care of you. Iâm not leavingâ" he paused, looking at Yeonjun. In a beat of silence, he was making a choice on what to say, even if he already knew the answer. "You should go, Yeonjun. If anyone is more capable of winning this or finding an exit, itâs you."
Yeonjun didnât reply, not at first. Instead, his head turned towards the four corners of the room. The time plastered against one of the walls marked fifteen minutes and thirty seconds. You were already almost halfway through.
Another wave of pain hit your body. But this time not from your ankle. You felt like you were hyperventilating, breathing too fast as your shoulders hunched. It was a greater pain than you had ever experienced your whole entire life, burning your nerves and making your head dizzy. You stared past your parted legs, half expecting it wasnât what you knew it was.
"Y/N? Y/N, whatâs going on?" Beomgyu tapped your cheek, his question answered by the liquid leaking through your pants and soaking the ground beneath you. His eyes went wide, the world freezing in that single moment.
"Her water broke." Yeonjunâs voice cracked, hands shaky as they hovered above youâ your legs, thighs, but never quite touching.Â
"What do we do?" Beomgyu hissed, your face was already contorting in pain. It was a pain far more cruel than the destiny of being subjected to pain by the knife of a red vested player. The tears came back, hot and unwavering down your cheeks.
"We need her on her back, come on. Help me out." Yeonjun rasped out, arms underneath your torso as Beomgyu gripped the underside of your thighs, lying your upper body down against the cold floor. Your knees were bent, pain from your ankle and pain from your body tearing open to bring life mingling together in a recipe for pure agony.
Beomgyu unzipped his tracksuit jacket, hastily pulling it off as he settled it above your legs. Your pants and underwear came off next, the pain far too great for you to even complain or feel shy about it. One of your hands rested above the swell of your stomach, a cry sharp and pained leaving you as you bit down on the sleeves of your own jacket.Â
"In and out, come on, breathe." Beomgyu was shaking all over, you could tell he had only the basic idea of what giving birth was like. He was almost as terrified as you were in pain. "Try to stay quiet, theyâll end up finding us."
You pushed to the best of your abilities, back arching off of the floor as your head thudded back against it. You didnât even register the dull throb, it was minor against the throbbing pain of your body prying open. "Just a little more, come on, push."Â
You screamed against the fabric, feeling how your saliva soaked through it. Everything hurt, your hands scrambling to grip somethingâanything. But you couldnât find anything. You wished Soobin was here.
You wished he found you right now. That he would be here to hold your hand and tell you it would be okay with the same tenderness in his eyes he held whenever he looked at you.Â
You were lightheaded, mind calling out for him, hoping that he would find you somehow in this exact moment across the expanse of the arena.Â
"Yeonjun-ah," Beomgyu called out shakily, quickly meeting Yeonjunâs eyes who had been peering outside through a slant of the slightly open door, keeping guard. "Come hold Y/Nâs hand."
Your grip was almost deadly, suffocating Yeonjunâs hand as it curled around yours. You couldnât process anything else, you just wanted to let out the pain somewhere. Your skull thudded against the floor again, body tensing and locking up.Â
"Hey, come on, you can do this." Yeonjun whispered, placing his other hand beneath the back of your head in order to stop you from hurting yourself further.
"Ready? Y/N, I need you to push again. Youâre so close." Beomgyu reassured, hands beneath the draped fabric of his jacket above your thighs. You squeezed your eyes shut, another cry tearing through you while being muffled by the sleeve of the jacket. Your free hand reached to press against the wall next to you, unsure if your body would even be able to handle another second of this agony. You felt like you were about to pass out from the pain.
"Oh, oh shitâI can see the head." Beomgyuâs own head raised from between your thighs, a desperate smile on his face before he ducked down again. "One more push, come on."
Every time he said one more push, you felt as if it stretched into eternity. But you fought for your baby so hard already, what was one more push?
Yeonjunâs eyes darted from your face towards the clock, nearly down to ten minutes now. The game was almost over, you just hoped fate would be merciful enough to conceal all of you inside the room.
One final scream ripped through you, then a cry. Soft, high pitched. You were shaking, body hurting everywhere. Beomgyu gasped, not realizing he had been crying along with you until they fell against the bloodied skin of your baby. It cried in his arms, a shudder of relief leaving you as Yeonjun let out a laugh of disbeliefâor relief, maybe both.
Your eyes finally opened, looking at your baby girl for the first time. All of the pain seemed worth it now that you looked at her. So small, so perfect. And she was all yours. She was fragile, all soft skin and pliant in Beomgyuâs arms. "Yeonjun-ah, take her, hand me the blade."Â
"Oh my god." Yeonjun whispered in disbelief, carefully reaching for your daughter with eyes filled with curiosity and care. Beomgyuâs hand reached for the blade peeking from Yeonjunâs pocket, grabbing the umbilical cord and bending it in an arch before cutting it. Separating your baby from the home it once made inside your body.
"Y/N." Yeonjun looked at you, meeting your tired face with a smile. Your legs finally closed, shaky as Beomgyu let the knife clatter against the ground to take the baby from Yeonjunâs arm, using his jacket to now carefully wrap your daughter in it. Yeonjun helped you sit up, warm hands letting you lean against the wall.
A sob clawed out of your throat, head falling forward as your arms held your daughter for the first time. One of you was crying out of relief, one was crying because she just arrived into the world. She was beautifulâyou thought, a gentle finger tracing the skin of her cheek.Â
"Eun-seo.." you murmured, chest trembling with emotion.
It was short lived. Fate had a brutal way of reminding you where you were, that you couldnât have nice things.
The door pushed open, a player in a red vest and a crazed look into his eyes that askedâno, demanded for blood appeared. A manic smile spread as he looked at you holding your daughter with a predatory grin. Instinctively, you held Eun-seo just a bit tighter.Â
It was a moment of silence. The playerâs eyes darted to Yeonjunâs hand gripping the blade he stole from the guy he killed. A split second later, he was already lunging with a shout. Yeonjun pushed himself to his feet, his own knife swishing and clanging with the otherâs in the air. Eun-seoâs cries alongside the grim reality she had to witness while barely being in the world for five minutes filled the air.
Yeonjun held the player back, grunting as the knife swished in front of his face. He was forced outside of the room, the force of him pushing back futile as the guy shoved him against the rocky wall outside. Both bodies hit the ground in separate ways, the loud clang of Yeonjun hitting the trash can spreading through the facility. He wasted no time, already propping himself on his elbows and pushing back as the guy lunged towards him with a knife.
He was different from the other one. There were no ceremonies.
The guy grabbed his pantleg, holding him in place. He was surprisingly strong, landing the blade inside his leg. A cry of pain left Yeonjun, who was already trying to retract his leg. Warm blood sprayed out of his wound onto the face of the other player, who already stood to swing at his neck. Yeonjun grabbed his arm that held the knife, raising his own to stab his waist before hauling the guy above and over him to the ground. Despite his wounded leg, he swung and tried to hit him to the best of his abilities.
"FUCK!" Yeonjun shouted as he was pushed against a door, unluckily for him, open. It burst behind his back, the guy already onto him swinging similar to how he had been. He ducked down, arms wrapping around his waist and hurling the guy to the ground as he hit it along him. Yeonjun stood up quicker, pressing himself against a wall.
The guy was no doubt crazy and thirsty for survival. The pointy tip of his knife forced its way towards Yeonjunâs head. Yeonjun held both of his arms, mustering up the strength and grip in the guyâs hand to throw him chest first against the wall, locking his arm between his own as he reached for the knife player 073 gripped on for dear life.Â
Once it eased out of his grip, Yeonjunâs arm met the guyâs neck in a headlock. Silencing his cries with the lack of air his grip provided. He pressed the knife once into his chest, the loud squelch sealing his fate. Pulling it back, he plunged it into his body three more times before letting go.
He was panting, gulping for air as his eyes snapped towards the open door. Another red vested player, wide eyed and terrified by the battle, watched as Yeonjunâs blood soaked hand holding the knife cleaned the corner of his mouth, streaking his face with blood. Despite Yeonjunâs blue vest, he scurried off without a second thought.Â
He hadnât even noticed the door behind him, maybe he had, just had not registered it. Not the metal lock requiring all three keys, the exit.
"Player 073, eliminated!â
Good, Yeonjun thought as his shoulders sagged, standing still to catch his breath. Run off like a little bitch.
He grimaced, eyeing his stabbed leg. He would have to keep moving. Go back to you and Beomgyu. In limps, he moved forward. But once his brain drained from adrenaline, it finally dawned onto him. His head snapped backwards towards the metal lock, above the door, it clearly said exit.
As quickly as he could limp, Yeonjunâs shaky hands reached for all three keys. He slid them into each respective keyhole, twisting them with loud clangs before opening the door. He pushed it open.
A soft, almost golden light in the room greeted him. Polished, safe. His lips quirked up in a smile, feet nearly crossing the threshold as a congratulatory song played above. But he halted.
You. Your pained face and sprained ankle. Beomgyuâs trusting smile as he handed him the baby.
He walked back, a trail of blood left behind as he used all of his strength. Youâd all survive. Be safe. Soobin had already killed someone, which meant youâd meet him as soon as you were led back into the room.
He walked back, a trail of blood left behind as he used all of his strength. Youâd all survive. Be safe. Soobin had already killed someone, which meant youâd meet him as soon as you were led back into the room. He pushed the door open, meeting Beomgyuâs startled eyes and your hoping gaze. It filled him with warmth, the way you two counted on him.
"Yeonjun-ah!" Beomgyu greeted in a smile, glad to see him alive.Â
"I found the exit." Yeonjunâs voice shook, hopeful and proud. "We can get out of here together." He heaved, gripping the door handle for balance. "Come on, quicklâ"
Hope was always the easiest thing to be destroyed. You could easily pick it up like a fragile thing, toss it beneath your feet, and crush it without questioning how it would make others feel. You always felt like that as a kid, every time a couple walked into the orphanage year after year, they always had a pleased glance as they examined the kids like meat in the market.
At first, you hoped you would be taken in soon. That you would find loving parents.
"Donât worry, youâll be adopted soon. Just have patience, Y/N." One of the mothers in the orphanage comforted your broken six year old heart, hand patting the top of your head as you clung to her skirt and wept. You felt lonely.
But you werenât adopted that year. And not the year after, nor the other.
Theyâd always say the same thing year after year. You stopped believing it at some point, when they took the closest person you had to a friend, you stopped feeling hopeful and accepted you werenât good enough to be wanted as a daughter.
But now, this was different.
Your expression shifted from relief to horror at the squelch of blood. Yeonjunâs expression shifted from happy, to pained. He didnât scream, it wasnât a dramatic death. It was just the drop of a smile, the clang of his knife against the ground as the swishing knife against his back left and plunged again. He opened his mouth, not to scream, but to spit out blood.
His eyes filled with tears in his last moments. Heavy but also fulfilled as they met your own terrified gaze and Beomgyuâs expression struck with a mix of disbelief and pained denial.Â
Even in his last moments, he smiled. Itâs okay. He tried to convey, not trying to seem too much at pain despite how his mind fogged up, how he couldnât hold his body upwards anymore. His eyes rolled back with a pitiful strangled noise, and he fell to the ground.
"Yeonjun.." you rasped out, struggling to grapple and compare his lifeless eyes to the ones that were gleaming just moments ago. Your breath stuttered as you gazed at the player who killed him. Heart stopping, pressing Eun-seo closer to your chest.
Sunghoon.
Of course he would be the one to ruin something good for you. He had already passed the game, but his bloodthirsty and money seeking aided mind wouldnât be satisfied with killing just one player. More players dead from the blue team meant more money, less players to kill meant people from the red team would die.
Sunghoon panted, not bothering to look further into the room as he examined Yeonjunâs dead body. But finally, he saw you.
You and Beomgyu looked like two cornered animals, Beomgyu was holding one of your arms tightly, coiled like a spring before he stood up and raised his fists. He wasnât the best fighter, not like Yeonjun was. But he refused to let you die, not when you just met your daughter.
Sunghoon wasnât looking at Beomgyu. His world blurred to the sides and focused on you. Your unbelieving expression, full of fear and tears. Yourâ his baby crying now more quietly in your arms. He felt his knees weaken for once, like jelly. Eun-seo cried louder in your arms, likely due to the commotion.
His knife lowered. Eyes filling with tears as if the moment was tender. It would be if you werenât terrified. Not of his knife, but of him.
"Park Sunghoon." A voice from behind called, the voice was undoubtedly Taehyunâs voice. It was calculated, almost annoyed and stressed as the sounds of footsteps drew closer. So they did end up partnering up after all.
Beomgyuâs face hardened, especially at the sound of Taehyunâs voice. He shuffled forward a bit more, covering your frame with his own.Â
"Yeah?" He swallowed hard, not meeting Taehyunâs face who had already perked up from a dead body he had just killed.
"Whatâs going on? Are there any more players left in there?"
"No, there arenât." Sunghoon finally concluded, a bit quicker than necessary as he shut the door. "Letâs go the other way."
Beomgyu broke a little further when he finally let his arms sag on either sides of his body, a sob wrecking his body as he kneeled carefully down next to Yeonjun. "Hyung.. no, please. Not you too." He stuttered out, hands caressing his hair in one last comforting motion.
You wanted to scream. Cry, break something, but all you managed were sobs. You couldnât even move properly towards Yeonjunâs lying limp body, feeling helpless had always been something you hated.Â
This game was good at throwing things you hated straight at you.
Beomgyuâs body doubled over, pressing his trembling lips to Yeonjunâs sweat coated forehead as his hands shut his eyes. Rest in peace. He looked peaceful, it was the part that ached and made your skin burn the most. A small smile still somehow held itself up, looking like he was dreaming rather than dying in a pool of his own blood.
"Player 454, eliminated!â
It took Beomgyu a few seconds to finally move, reaching underneath the tangled mess of Yeonjunâs sweat and blood wetted hair to pull out all three keys. He clung to them like a lifeline to his shaking hands, turning towards you.
"Yeonjun-ah said he found the exit, then Iâm sure itâs somewhere nearby." His throat bobbed, standing up.Â
"Canât we just stay here until itâs over?" You sniffled, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand.Â
"Too dangerous. Someone will hear your baby and come to kill us."Â
As quickly and gently as he could, Beomgyu helped you slide on your tracksuit pants and underwear. "Here, give me her." Beomgyu extended his arms, you complied, letting Eun-seo be taken by the safety of Beomgyuâs arms. You threw one arm over his shoulder, bringing yourself up and then using the wall as a support.
"Player 113, eliminated!"
At every mention of a dead player, your body tensed further. Limping in pain, you held back all of your pained groans despite all you wanting to do was pass out. Maybe sleep, anything. But you stayed put, following Beomgyu who had his eyes set on the trail of blood Yeonjunâs stabbed leg had left behind towards the exit.
Every step felt wrong, filled with anxiety and the sheer chance of a red team player rounding the corner and finding you. Thankfully, the exit wasnât too far. The green door peered open into a room where the three keyholes waited like a prize.
The timer was already down to three minutes, but you knew better than to wait here when fate could bend and twist in another cruel manner.Â
Once in the room, you examined the keyholes. Three shapes. They really didnât mean to make it that easy for the hiders.
"Hold her for a second." Beomgyu handed Eun-seo over, reaching into his pockets to fish out the three keys. You watched with hopefulness as the keys fit perfectly, twisting and unlocking. One step closer to freedom.
With every clank that meant the door unlocked, you glanced towards the open green door. Even if leaving was guaranteed, someone stumbling upon you wasnât.Â
The last key slid into its keyhole one last time.
But you werenât alone.
The figure of a girl who looked more desperate than ever appeared. The patchâ player 036. Wonhee. She didnât look like the sweet, smiling girl who comforted you in the bathroom. When she looked at you and Beomgyu, she barely acknowledged the baby. Instead, she looked relieved.
Thatâs when you realized. Throughout the entire game, you hadnât heard her number being called out as a pass.
"Beomgyu.." you whispered shakily, both of you now looking at Wonhee. All of you wanted to live, but one of you would have to die for that to happen. There was no way out of this.
There was no escaping the primal instinct that screamed for survival.
"Unnie.." she uttered, eyes dazed with fear and the urge to kill. She stepped into the room, every step that echoed in your ears made you press closer to Beomgyu.Â
"No. Stay back." Beomgyu took a step forward before you could grab his arm, standing defensively in front of you.Â
"Wonhee. You donât have to do this." You pleaded, voice cracking.
"I couldnât do it, unnie." She sobbed, pressing the knife against her forehead. Not the tip, just the flat side of the blade. Like she felt remorse. "I couldnât kill anyone."
Deep down, you knew she didnât. She wanted to go home as much as you did.
"Iâm going to die, are you going to let me die?!" She shouted, breaking under the pressure of the timer and the game. "Unnie, you wanted to get out of here. I want to go home too, I donât want to die."
She took another step forward, eyes flickering over to Beomgyu. "I couldnât kill anyone." She spoke, voice barely above a whisper.Â
"Donât you fucking dare." Beomgyu spat, unmoving.
"One minute left!"
She lunged, knife raised clumsily towards Beomgyuâs head. He dodged easily, body swaying to the side as his hands gripped the strands of her long hair, yanking her to the floor. A grunt left her lips, choking in her own desperation and tears. She didnât let go of her knife.
"Donât do this to yourself." Beomgyu warned, not having it. Pity wasnât something you could offer, even if it made you a killer. Not here.
But she was losing her mind. Wonhee stood up one last time, swinging the knife aimlessly as Beomgyu staggered back towards the exit. You cried because you didnât want either of them to die, but you were powerless to stop death. Grief dug a sharper blade into your heart, tearing it open and carving itself there like a searing, burning mark.Â
She was just a terrified girl. She wasnât meaning to do harm, all Wonhee wanted was to go home. Her once sparkly, concerned self when she held your crying frame in the bathroom died before she even did. This game was structured to bring out the worst in you if you didnât fight. She clearly didnât.
You wished it was you. Even if you didnât want to die, the fact that so many people died with you being involved in it or because of you made self-hatred bite you in the ankle like a venomous snake.Â
Beomgyu quickly pushed himself off of the wall as her blade hit it, breaking the sharp metal from its handle. She didnât care. Wonhee grabbed the blade sharply, a cry tearing from her lips as the material sliced her palms. She still staggered forward, tossing herself with all her might on top of Beomgyu.
Just as she was about to strike Beomgyu straight in the stomach, a figure hauled her backwards. Wonhee let out a shriek, the sickening squelch of flesh prying open reaching your ears loudly despite the lack of vision you had.
"Fuck! Fuck, let me go!" She screamed, squirming in the hold of the man who held her.
Taehyun.
Taehyunâs eyes didnât hold hesitation, they held intention. His eyes met Beomgyuâs shocked ones, who hadnât moved, just witnessed the scene. "What are you doing? Go! Fucking move and get out of here!"
Wonhee twisted and turned, finally managing to strike the blade through Taehyunâs shoes. A shout of pain left him, his hands weakening in her hair. One of her hands covered the stab wound inflicted on her shoulder, letting it droop lower than her other one than her unharmed one. Fifteen seconds.
When she lunged against Taehyun, they disappeared into a corner. What came next was blood, screams and shouts both feminine and masculine.
Beomgyu didnât waste any more time. Time was lacking, but it didnât guarantee safety. He rushed inside the room, finding you already sliding the last key into the keyhole, rushing towards you to twist the knob as soon as the last lock opened.
"Player 036, eliminated!â
"Player 001, eliminated!â
Beomgyu had wanted Taehyun dead at first. But the fact he saved his life and your life made his opinions switch. Maybe he would never understand why Taehyun voted to continue, that secret would be taken to the black coffin wrapped in a pink ribbon. But it settled like another heavy weight inside his chest.
The group you all formed started with six people. Now, you are down to three.
The timer beeped to zero before you could manage to twist the knob, announcing the end of the game.
"The game has ended!"
Neither you nor Beomgyu looked for the bodies. Couldnât. You stood there looking at each other, tears streaming down silently as he wrapped you in a hug. You cried not only because of relief or survival, but because you grieved together over the people you two grew to care about despite knowing you shouldnât.
    THE RESTLESS sound of anxious footsteps clanged above the metal steps next to the bunks. Choi Soobin couldnât help but look towards the door that led inside the main lobby, wondering where you were. Why was it taking so long? He hadnât heard your number called in the speakers, neither did Beomgyuâsâ
His mind flashed towards the earlier moments. Chasing down blue vested players inside the facility hadnât been easy. He was standing along, head held high as he stepped through the yellow corridor and inside the almost neighborhood-like arena. It expanded in stretched corridors, endless doors, and escape routes.
He took one of the exits where no other taggers went.
Even if all of these hallways met in a single middle room, the chances of finding a player and not having to fight for them would be lower. He didnât rush, surely, the hiders were on the edge. Ears open more than usual to any wound that would mean a tagger is coming. Within every edge, he turned and perked around.Â
He could also come across as a hider, if that would do. Soobin observed that most players acted by despair, not by logic. They didnât think, they just searched for the quickest exit.
Six within the game, and Soobin still somehow hadnât found anyone. He heard the occasional shuffling, the screams that pierced through his eardrums, but against his luck, no players. Occasionally, he walked past other taggers who had either been searching for players to kill, or were just walking around after completing their task.
He hadnât meant to stumble with them.
The door in front of him as his hand hovered above the knob opened too suddenly, a player with a blue vestâ a middle aged woman, stumbled back against his chest with blood squirting from her neck. She was gurgling, alive, but in agony. Whoever was playing with her planned to let her suffer, the stab wasnât in a lethal spot.
His heart skipped a beat. If she wasnât dead, then he could kill her and take the credits. Wrong as it was, survival didnât care about rules.
His knife that had been idly swinging next to his thigh was gripped firmer, raised to her knife as one of his arms wrapped around her neck to prevent her from moving.
"P-pleaseâ" she croaked out, color draining from her face. It wasnât quite clear if she was begging for mercy or for Soobin to put her out of her misery.
"Thatâs my kill, let go of her." Player 333 snarled, surging through the door with blood splattered all over his face in front of him.Â
He had already passed. He was just trying to eliminate competition. Soobin was sure that just moments ago, his number had been called. Their eyes locked, but Sunghoon couldnât attack Soobin. It was forbidden.
Screw basic common sense.
Soobinâs knife was quick, swishing through the air in a clean strike as he twisted it inside the skull of the woman. She stopped struggling, her wounds spurting blood in his already dirtied uniform as she fell to the ground. "You already passed, donât get too greedy."
"Player 374, pass."
"I know you." The player snorted, stepping closer as his jaw slid horizontally. His knife was raised up in the air, not meaning to be harmful. Just an object to taunt. "Werenât you the motherfucker who started the voting thing?" He paused, looking at Soobin up and down. "The one walking around with that lady. She was walking kind of funny, yâknow? Did you find time to fool around with her?"
His words werenât so teasing. They were laced with bitterness and jealousy. Jealousy over someone who he couldnât stake the claim over.
"Leave her out of your fucking mouth." Soobin warned, stepping forward. He wasnât afraid of that knife, if the guy killed him, heâd die as well.Â
"Why? What are you going to do, kill me?" Sunghoon tutted, pressing the tip of the knife against Soobinâs throat. Neither of them moved, a silent challenge in the air. "Youâre pathetic. I wonder why she chose you out of every man she couldâve picked."
It wasnât hard to connect the dots. The discomfort plastered beneath all of that cocky confidence, there was no doubt this was the babyâsâno, Eun-seoâs biological father.
"Unlike you, I can compete and show what love is instead of going ahead and trying to make shitty attempts that you call amends." His knife raised, pressing against the side of Sunghoonâs throat. There was no aggressiveness or violence, but the threat was there. If you stab me, I stab you. If I die, you also die.
"Yah, Park Sunghoon." A bored voice filtered through the tense atmosphere, Taehyun walked a few moments after. He stood still as he saw the situationâthey were literally at each otherâs throat. "Are you stupid? Youâre going to get yourself killed. Heâs not worth our time."
Snickering and pushing his tongue against the corner of his mouth, Sunghoon hesitatingly brought his knife down, a vein popping in his forehead out of annoyance. He didnât like being interrupted, least of all being wrong. "Youâre lucky you swapped with her. Youâd be the first fucker Iâd come after and have the satisfaction to kill."
Soobin didnât waver. He stood there, refusing to break eye contact or do so much as blink. His hand, which held the handle of the knife, didnât move. At least not until Sunghoon stepped back.
"Stop it, youâre being stupid." Taehyun scolded, exchanging glances with Soobin one last time before he turned the opposite way, leaving him behind with Sunghoon trailing right after him.
Obviously, not without shooting him the middle finger.
But throughout the entirety of the game, with each scream and rip of flesh, he hadnât managed to catch a single flash of you or the others. Yeonjun had died, that much he was aware of. It made his gut twist, but he forced himself to press forward, to look for you.
The only reassurance he had of you being alive was the fact your number hadnât been called in the speakers.
The clang of the door opening ahead of him scattered his thoughts, players from the blue team walking in with a new layer of trauma clinging to every fiber of their beings. Some were shaken up, some were hollow. Some are still terrified.
A cry of a baby came next.
Soobin froze, a faltering step pressing forward as you surged through the door with Beomgyu. Beomgyu looked exhausted, you looked more worn down than ever. His arm was wrapped around your torso, and in your arms, a little bundle who wouldnât stop crying.
His whole world stopped.
Your eyes met his next, so, so painfully tired but so happy to finally see him. Soobin took one step forward, then another, and another until he was running towards your limping form held up by Beomgyu, who wasnât doing any better.
"Y/N!" He shouted, hands trembling so hard they were unsure where to land. They opted to hold your face as Beomgyu finally let go of you, already moving towards the carefully arranged bunks you all had been sleeping in these past few days. "Are you okay? Why are you limping?"
His questions came out in a rapid speech, unsure what to ask first or if he should apologize for not being able to find you.
His breath shook, eyes wide with flooding relief. And then he caught the babyâs faceâshe was so beautiful. She looked like you, some of the traces undoubtedly belonged to Sunghoon, but she was still beautiful. "Oh my god."
A smile broke across your face despite the exhaustion, nodding with teary eyes in a way that broke his heart and made it ache at the same time. "Sheâs so tiny.." he trailed off, all words he had planned to say when she arrived dying in his throat. His finger caressed her cheek, marveling at the softness of her skin.
"Do you want to hold her?" You asked, already extending Eun-seo towards Soobin.
He shook his head, Soobin had already noticed the way you were walking funny, the way your skin was unnaturally purple as it peeked through the space between your shoes and pants. "Letâs sit first, come on. Iâll help you."
Killing someone had never been in Soobinâs plans, but if it meant you were safe, that your daughter was safe, then it didnât matter much.
   YOU SAT WITH YOUR LEGS stretched in front of you, finally resting after this game took so much effort for you to complete. Beomgyu was sitting by the edge of the bed, knees tucked into his chest as he watched Soobin hold your daughter. She was crying anymore, just cooing in Soobinâs arms.
He looked at her with something akin to awe, all tension draining from his body. "Hi, Eun-seo." He cooed, he was the happiest heâd ever looked since arriving inside the games. "Itâs daddy."
Your heart felt fuzzy, unable to keep your eyes off of them. Something about Soobin saying âitâs daddyâ felt right. Like it was meant to happen, meant to have always been there. Maybe in another universe, far away from this one, Eun-seo was actually his. In a universe where you would be able to pursue your dreams and live with no financial worries or stress of death.
Eun-seo had long ago stopped crying since she settled into Soobinâs arms, it was almost instinctual the way she quieted down with a feeling of belonging.
"I promise Iâll get you and your mommy out of here." He whispered, not audible to your ears. Her hand was warm, tiny and trusting as it wrapped around his index finger. It was a tender moment. He couldnât disappoint her.
Even if she couldnât quite place how heavy a promise deep as this was. His lips landed on top of her head, a pinky promise kiss. She was far too small to even tie her pinky around his.
It was a beautiful sight. It put your heart at ease to see how well Soobin handled Eun-seo with so much tenderness. If he had already been soft with you, this was just another part of him bared whole. Blossoming softly and quietly to welcome something so precious, something you offered. Almost like the flowers blossoming quietly at the attention of the sun during spring. Eun-seoâs fragility brought all of it out.
She started crying soon after, sharp. Discomfort painting her figuresâ you were still new to this, hell, you didnât know anything about babies before getting pregnant. And it wasnât like this place would offer guidance. Still, your instincts drove you to extend your arms, a quiet plea.
"I think sheâs hungry." Soobin searched your face for some sort of reassuranceâ both you completely clueless, but still figuring it out.
"I donât know if she is." You took Eun-seo into your arms, this would be your reality for the next few monthsâ figuring out everything about her. "But Iâll try."
You reached for the hem of your shirt, pulling it upwards above one of your breasts, easing your bra out of you as carefully as you could to not make Eun-seo more fussy than she already was.Â
The first time she latched onto your nipple, cries soothing down to gulping noises as you held her upwards in a cradle, you forgot to breathe. This. No, she was the reason why you pushed through so much. The reason why you didnât give up even when it seemed impossible. You met your reason to move forward, and now it was her turn to rely on you.
THE SOUND OF LAUGHTER was rich, mingling with the crinkle of glasses that tapped together in joyous conversations that heaved with excitement. It hadnât been too long since the VIPs had arrived, those who arrived earlier got to be in the last game as guards, taking out players for a more vivid experience of what it is to kill rather than to just sit back and relax. The table rounded in a pentagon to accommodate each and every one of the masked people, bored and rotten billionaires who had nothing else to bet on that found people dying funny.
If people broken down by poverty were ugly, the rich were broken down by greed.
Above the room, the ceiling was flat atop. A wooden, rich perfect design that rose higher into a pentagon shape above the dinner table to shine a soft, white lighting into the dishes being provided.Â
"You know, dear host. Iâve always enjoyed watching it from the outside." A rich voice spoke to break the silence, each VIP sizing each other up in silence as if to say âIâm better.â But all of them were rotting from the inside out equally. "But it was a pleasurable experience to put on the uniforms and take part in the games. Nothing can compare to it."
The glass filled with expensive wine that was enough to make most peopleâs nose contort at the smell was lifted to his lips, the liquid sloshing at the movements. "It brings me back to when I was back in Africa hunting in the wilderness. They looked almost like animals."
"Iâve done plenty of hunting before, but this was on another level. You truly exceeded our expectations this year, dear hosts. The players too, they count me very intrigued." A sultry voice chided in, adding onto the very pleased expressions of the invited ones.
"Ugh, was I the only one who didnât go?" A guy groaned in complaint, head tossing backwards before flinging back into place. Always careful to not slide off his bull mask. His hand smacked against the expensive fabric of his beige suit, annoyance in his movements. "My fucking driver was late, and I paid that motherfucker so much money to make sure that wouldnât happen, too."
"Are you sure your driver was the problem? Or were you just too drunk to wake up on time?" A rich laughter left her lips, amusement flickering in the features that her mask didnât show.
"You wanna know something? When you actually shut up, you can make yourself look kind of attractive." The other enunciated, his eye roll practically audible through his tone.
"Back to our dear host," Someone else chided in, breaking apart the banter. "The work youâve done here is top notch. Not only letting us watch the games, but also letting us participate."
"Iâm always bettering the experience within the games to please my guests to the best of my abilities."Â
"And youâve done an amazing job." The woman smiled, raising her glass towards the hostâs direction. "This is the most fun Iâve had in years, and Iâve seen these games since I was in my twenties."
"Truly, the players intrigue me as well. I mean, player number one getting eliminated because he wanted to save that one pregnant lady with her baby was a spectacle." The bull masked guest kissed the roof of his tongue, savoring the wine that pleased his tastebuds. "I mean, he was kind of stupid, too. Who would sacrifice their lives in order to save someone theyâve just met?"
"Ah, yes. Speaking of which, did you notice the other two contestants?.. a tall one, blonde. Heâs kind of cute, I donât blame 434. And then thereâs the other one, but he has black hair. They were having an argument over her for a few minutes within the game." The snake masked woman noted, crossing her legs. "I wonder who the baby daddy is."
"Want to bet?" Another woman spoke for the first time, a tiger mask concealing her features and only giving sight to the bold, red lip gloss she wore. "Iâll say itâs the black haired one, just because heâs cuter. But thatâs my opinion."
"I was going to place my bet on him! But.. well, sheâs closer to the tall hottie. Iâll say itâs him."Â
"Dear host, you donât happen to know who the father is, do you? Or do you not know everything as you claim you do?" The bull masked man jumped in, clearly interested.Â
"I do know."
"Then, you tell us when the games end. Hah.. I just hope that mother makes it. Sheâs so pitiful it almost makes me actually feel bad for her."
   "CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL OF YOU FOR MAKING IT THROUGH THE FOURTH GAME."Â
The mechanical doors opened to reveal the guards you no longer felt afraid of, you just resented them now. How they acted superior, they were emotionless and moved like they were machines, talked and followed orders like lapdogs of a superior leader.Â
"Here are the results of the fourth game." A beep from the controller illuminated the barely populated room. Bunks that once stood tall, almost near the ceiling, were now brought down. There were maybe around twenty five players, the last game had been a bloodbath where both separated parties were eliminated mercilessly. Some steps that werenât removed didnât have a platform or expanded to the side in bunks, not anymore.
The room felt way worse when it was deserted.
The money fell in mechanically alongside the hum of the sound it produced as it clattered inside the nearly filled up piggy bank, some players standing in awe at the amount of money presented. "In the fourth game, seventy five players were eliminated. Now, we have twenty five players remaining. The prize money is now up to 43.1 billion won, and the share to each person here is 1.724 billion won."
Your breath hitched. This surely had to mean the games would stopâ you really hoped thatâs what it meant. There was no way this wasnât enough, unless the continuing players really did mean to play with their luck.Â
You didnât let yourself hope anymore. You were outnumbered, voting was futile when the answer was clear.
"Now, you will take a vote to decide whether to continue the games or not."
Eun-seo had already fallen asleep, resting against your arms. You tried your best to get some sleep, exhaustion taking over your body for the moment. You didnât get much of it, soon you were already in the same neat separated groups you had been since the first voting.Â
"We will now start from the decreasing numbers up to the higher ones. Player 068, please cast your vote." The footsteps didnât scare anymore, you didnât anticipate anyone changing their minds because everyone was too far gone. Either too far gone in their own desires, or too scared to go against the remaining group of oâs.
Because there were still forks tucked inside the pillowcases of bunks that werenât taken away.
"If you wish to end them, press the X button."
A buzz of confirmation, your eyes remained locked on the screen as the zero to zero tie flickered to one against zero. Most players in the voting wanted to continue, you knew you would lose.
Your hopes of winning were also low. Your ankle was still fractured, you had just given birth. You were mostly weak and fighting to move your body. At least if you died, Soobin would be strong enough to make it out of here and take care of Eun-seo.
Your vote still remained against the games, the red patch had already seared into the velcro layer of the left side of your uniform. The numbers of players against this game thinned, you didnât focus on the score screen anymore. You focused on your daughter. On Soobin, who still held you by the waist. If you two made it here so far, you could push on a little more, right?
The vote had the outcome you expected, you didnât count the difference in votes anymore because it didnât matter. Losing was still losing, crying over spilled milk was useless. Instead, as soon as the voting ended, you tucked Eun-seo in bed between you and Soobin. Sleep didnât come easy to you naturally, not with every sense of yours on edge.
So you lulled your mind to sleep to the image of this same moment in another scenario. Maybe in a few days, maybe when you were out of here and under the warm blankets of your then shared bedroom in a house you two picked without worrying about money. Youâd fill that house with warm memories, giving Eun-seo a happy childhood rather than one filled with sadness and anger. Fill your house with laughter and the memory of her first steps, the idea of you and Soobin taking her to the first day of preschool, and lastly, the final thought that breached your no longer struggling brain was the idea of the world becoming simpler, growing old with Soobin as you sat in rocking chairs in the front porch, reminiscing every choice you made together to make it to where you hoped youâd be.
Next morning arrived way too quickly, the lights you hated for being harsh had never gotten easier on your waking eyes. The rest you took was short lived, the pain from yesterday just deepened. Your ankle was sore, propped up on a pillow Beomgyu had placed under your ankle before he slipped into a bunk next to the mattress you and Soobin slept in.
You rubbed sleep away from your eyes, glancing at Soobin who had already started to stir awake. He had barely gripped reality properly, but he still smiled at the blurry, grainy vision of you. "Morning."
You wanted to wake up next to him everyday. Truly, you just hoped fate wouldnât take him from you too. You werenât sure if you would be able to take it.
"The fifth game will start soon, please follow the instructions from our staff!"
You rubbed your sore neck, already picking up Eun-seo. You walked with Soobinâs help, Beomgyu carried Eun-seo and walked ahead because he insisted you shouldnât put too much stress on your body. If you were alone in here, you probably would have died already. The steps in itself were agony.
The classical music grated your ears, pain exploding through your nerves every time you stepped onto another step. It was excruciating, raw. Almost as if your ankle was going through that same exact moment where it snapped with a sickening crunch over and over again. Still, you kept going. Not complying with the staff meant elimination.
"Let me carry you." Soobin halted, unable to see you in so much pain for too long. Every step was agony, especially since your ankle kept swelling within every hour. You needed a doctor as soon as possible, but since you couldnât get one in here, your best option would be to not walk on it.Â
"Iâm fine," you reassured, already a half step towards the higher level.Â
"You shouldnât walk on it, justâlet me take care of you." He insisted, exasperated. Arguing against Soobin was practically useless. "You said you trusted me. Youâve trusted me this far, so let me take care of you and stop putting yourself through so much agony. Youâve just given birth, too. Let your body rest and leave everything else to me."
Once again, you shoved all your pride down your throat. Head jerking in nods instead of words, all because his concern and careful acts always caught you off guard enough to strip you mentally.
"Fine."
The rest of the way up the steps were quiet, filled with hearts that beat way too fast for the confidence his mouth spoke with and your brain believed in. The doors opened to a dark scenario, almost as dark as the starry night of the previous game, except it was hazy. Your heart stuttered, breath stuck in your chest. In front of you, a doll almost as tall as the doll who had been counting in red light green light stood. For sure, it had to be her. Across from her was another doll, a boy with a carved smile. Almost as if they wouldnât be the cause of your deaths.
There was a bridge between them, a gap that would ensure a false step would be a gruesome fall to the floor. Jumping rope.
You wanted to puke. There was no way you were surviving this, not with a fractured ankle.
The ceiling above you was high, colors of purple and hues of orange kissing and mingling with lighter and darker shades of blue. You were extremely high up. You could tell from the gap you saw in the bridge that this wasnât a short fall, it was one that would either kill you immediately or strike you and leave you bleeding out in agony.
"What the hell is this?" You heard someone mutter, you werenât the only one intimidated by the overwhelming size of the dolls and the distance that seemed farther than it actually was that led to the safety of the other side.
"Welcome to the fifth game! The game you will be playing is Jump rope. You must cross the bridge as you jump over the rotating rope and get to the other side within twenty minutes."
Soobin placed you against a nearby bench the arena had to offer, kneeling down next to you. Beomgyu found the two of you next, he didnât need to ask for you to know that he was wondering how the hell youâd cross with a fractured ankle and with your baby here.
"You may decide on the order amongst yourselves."
"How the hell are we going to cross?" Beomgyu hissed, grimacing as Soobin pulled up the hem of the bottom of your pants. Your ankle was way too bad to jump on, even if you managed to haul yourself to the bridge, you would trip on the rope and fall. "She canât crossâitâs almost as if they want her dead."
"Weâll find a way." Soobin shakily replied, but every exit was far too risky.Â
"Now, let the game begin!"Â
The sound of the rope finally unlocking from its still hold rang loudly through the room, the swish of the rope aggressive. It cut through the wind sharper than the blade from the previous game, fast. When you played jump rope as a kid, it sometimes resulted in angry marks of rope burns on your legs. This time, not jumping on time would mean youâd crack your skull open after a brutal fall.
"Knock, knock. Who is there? Your little friend! Come on in!"
Anyone who grew up during your time before the screens knew this song. It was memorized by every kid, a song that tied every childhood together.
"Little friend, little friend, turn around. Little friend, little friend, touch the ground."
You had never been so glad that the rules didnât require you to follow the song. It would make it impossible to win.
"Little friend, little friend, touch your toe. Little friend, little friend, now away you go."
You shook your head, a pressure building up heavily in your chest as you watched some players jump before even being in the bridge, trying to find the perfect timing.
"Soobin, no. Leave me here." You pleaded, clasping his hands between your own. "Take Eun-seo and leave, itâs too dangerous. Itâs best if I go than you, you have a best shot at winning and Beomgyuâ"
"Weâre not leaving you here, Y/N. We made it here this far, you canât be serious if you expect us to abandon you here!" Soobinâs voice raised a bit louder than necessary, drawing the eyes of other players who just ignored it to focus on their own game right now.
He shook his head, allowing his shoulders to slump forward. "If you die, then Iâm dying here too. Thereâs no in between."
"You canât do this." You insisted, frustrated.
"Then let me do this for you." He paused, the emotion in his voice and determination to somehow get you two across weakening your resolve.Â
"Iâll cross with Eun-seo." Beomgyu fidgeted with the fabric of his jacket that had been used to wrap Eun-seo up until now. "Iâll make it to the other side. You bring Y/N, she canât jump like that."
The timer ticked down to sixteen minutes, Soobin adjusted a neat podaegi. Once he knotted the fabric three times to ensure Eun-seo wouldnât fall, he gripped Beomgyu by the shoulders. Urgent.
"I want to see you two on the other side." Was all he said. He didnât hesitate, he fully trusted Beomgyu. If he kept you safe throughout the games while he wasnât there to be with you, then he could trust Beomgyu to keep his daughter safe.
"Iâll see you and Y/N there." He nodded, meeting your teary eyes one last time. He offered you a smile, then finally turned away towards the parted legs of the doll that were an entrance towards the bridge.
"We canât just stay here, someone has to go!" Player 100 exclaimed, freaking out. No one wanted to go first, even if going first, between, or last didnât change what fate had prepared for you, no one wanted to experience it first. Just like no kid wanted to be called up first on the starting days of school to solve a new math problem on the board.
"Youâre all talk. If you want someone to go already, then take the lead!" Another player retorted.Â
"Iâll go first." Beomgyu finally managed out, pushing past the crowd of players as he zipped the jacket to cover Eun-seoâs body completely. Swallowing down every bit of dread and urge to recoil away from the rope. With a calculated glance, as soon as the rope flung upwards, he sprinted forwards on the little space the bridge provided as much as he could, jumping once the corner of his eye caught it swinging down close to his feet.
The players behind gasped, you held your air as you tried to stare past the crowd. You couldnât see clearly.
Beomgyuâs heart was beating so hard he swore it might as well kill him before the rope even did. His balance faltered, he gripped Eun-seo tighter as he recovered it quickly. Her wails pierced the air, but he jumped again. He had to ignore her for now if he wanted to live. He took one more jump to regain his footing, refusing to remain still for too long, he made another run for it, nearing the gap on the bridge.
Holy shit, Beomgyuâs mind raced, he couldnât help but feel dizzy as he stared at how far the ground was from the bridge. The gap was not too large, it wasnât impossible to cross, but a step too short would take anyone to their deaths. He forced his vision back, refusing to let it blur. He kept jumping, kept his focus even as he stood still in the same place.
"Why isnât he going?" You limped forward, arm swung over Soobinâs arm. You were terrified, what scared you most of all was the possibility of Eun-seo dying with Beomgyu and you living. Youâd never forgive yourself if it happened. "What is he doing?"
"Thereâs probably a gap in the bridge to make this more difficult." Soobin groaned, running a free hand through his hair, tugging at it to release the stress.
"JUST JUMP!" Player 100 screamed, for a moment, you swore that the parts of the players that cheered each other on during the pentathlon came back. Everyone wanted Beomgyu and the baby to make it across.
Beomgyu pushed forward in a jump as soon as the rope swung upwards, bending over as sweat dripped down his neck. His knees thudded heavily against the bridge, despite the exertion, he still forced himself up to jump as the rope ricocheted down again. He stopped making runs for it in order to keep his balance.
One, two. Beomgyu counted mentally, jumping every time he reached two, then he took two steps forward. Only making a final run for it once he was close to the other side of the bridge, he stumbled forward, catching himself on the gelid leg of the doll.
Cheers erupted from your side of the bridge, a smile breaking through your face. Your chest flooded with relief, they were alive.Â
"He did it." You breathed out in relief, your nails no longer digging into your clammy palms to let out your anxiety that rippled through you in waves.
"Player 120, pass!"
Beomgyuâs hand shook as they unzipped the jacket, Eun-seoâs crying face coming into view. She was unharmed, still safe. He turned and searched for you and Soobin in the crowd of cheering players, raising Eun-seoâs body in the air. "Y/N! I have her! Please come right away!"
With the display of courage, more players pushed forward. Jumping in rhythm together.
"Come on, we have to go." Soobin ushered, arms hooking under the back of your knees and supporting your torso. "Weâll be there soon, okay? Donât worry."
The timer was already down to twelve minutes, Soobin pushed through the crowd of players who were already lining up to go. Without hesitating, he rushed forwards the second the rope flung above your heads.Â
Everything seemed to go in slow motion.
It swished down, Soobinâs body rippled everywhere with every thud of his feet against the ground. Your eyes flickered to the floor beneath the bridge, the distance enough to make acidic bile rise up your throat. You were utterly dependent on Soobin.
You werenât married, at least not yet, but this felt like a seal of âuntil death do us apartâ. Was this truly what the promise was? Most people said it aimlessly, some meant it, but you never realized how heavy that vow could be. Not until now.
A scream of a falling player caught your attention. From the bending over players that kept jumping, you saw someone else already at the other side with Beomgyu. He was standing at the very edge of the end of the bridge, pushing players down.
"Player 312, eliminated!"
No one moved. No one dared to.
"Yah, what the hell do you think youâre doing?!" Beomgyu barked, setting Eun-seo down against a bench he found. Everyone on the bridge was still jumping, but no one could jump for twelve minutes. Even if they could, all of you would be eliminated with no doubts.
"What do you think Iâm doing?" The man smiled, manic. "Iâm playing the game."
"No one can cross the bridge, you shitheads!" The man shouted, standing menacingly to stop players from coming through.
"Shit, what the hell is he doing?" Soobin cursed, exhaustion slowly creeping in as he gripped you a little more tightly, his legs straining under the added weight your body possessed landing alongside his own body weight.
"Holding us off." You choked out, your throat feeling too tight for you to breathe.Â
"Player 163, eliminated!"
"Player 178, eliminated!"
"Hey, stop that bullshit!" Beomgyu scolded, taking a step forwardâhe really was trying to give this guy the benefit of doubt.
"Stop what? Come help me stop them from crossing! If we both win, weâll each leave with 23.25 billion won each!" He boasted, already pushing off another player.
"Player 177, eliminated!"
"Player 352, eliminated!"
With every body dropped, Soobin pushed forward. Once you neared the gap in the bridge, he sucked in a deep breath. The whirl of the rope cracking in the air was overwhelming, now he understood why Beomgyu took so long to cross the gap.
"Weâre going to die." You whispered, clinging to his shirt until your knuckles turned white. "Heâs not going to let us through."
"I promise, Iâll make sure you cross even if itâs the last thing I do." Soobin forced out through his teeth, his breath too short to form a proper speech without panting.
"Move." Beomgyu gritted through his teeth, the rope speeding up was sure to tire everyone out eventually.
"Donât you get it? Do you know just how much money that is?"
"Yeah? What if I pushed you from behind? Then I wouldnât have to share it." The barely contained rage on Beomgyuâs face finally did something, pushing the guy to actually step aside.
No amount of added money was worth being pushed off after surviving this far.
"Come on, the rope is speeding up!" He barked towards the players on the bridge, relief and gratitude painting their expressions together all at once.
"Player 100, pass."
With every passing player, your eyes caught at the clock. The bridge was already becoming too full on the side behind the gap, there was no choice but to jump over. Soobin wouldnât be able to jump forever, especially not with you in his arms.
Nearly losing his balance, Soobin rushed and jumped forward with burning legs. The view of the other platform became clearer, the distance shortening with every jump and ricochet of the quickening rope. "Almost there, weâve got this."
"Just make a run for it! Youâre going to run out of time!" Beomgyu ushered, you felt so sick with relief you were sure you were becoming green-faced.Â
"YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!" The commotion ahead stopped Soobin in the tracks, so close but so far. Beomgyu hit the ground before you could process anything further, knuckles against skin pushing grunts from Beomgyuâs mouth.Â
"We couldâve stopped it here," Player 017 growled, pushing Beomgyu further against the ground. Both of his hands were tight around his throat, intending to choke the life out of him before even throwing Beomgyu off. "But since you pulled off this stunt, Iâm taking you out instead and your share."
"Player 425, eliminated!"
"Let him go!" Your words almost hurt due to the tightness of your throat, pushing it down and managing your words when anxiety was pulling at your brain as if you were a puppet controlled by it was hard.
To your horror, the squelch of flesh ripped through the air as sharp as the whip of the rope, another player eliminated behind you, but the squelch didnât come from the crack of skull hitting the ground that expanded downwards. It came from ahead.
"FUCK! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" Blood seeped down Beomgyuâs thumb, with lacking air and not much strength, he forced his hand upwards. It wasnât a pretty sight, but his thumb gouged out the eye of the player above him. He grimaced at the feeling, but it wasnât enough for the hands around his throat to be loosened. As soon as the rope whipped up again, Beomgyu hit his feet against the playerâs chest, attempting to mimic what Yeonjun did during the last round as he used every bit of coiled up strength to push the player above his head. Undoubtedly, despite his best efforts, Beomgyu was the one who took the playerâs share.
"Player 008, eliminated!"
One quick glance at the clock that marked nearly just two minutes was all Beomgyu needed to extend his hand towards you and Soobin, please keep going.
Every time your body jolted when Soobinâs foot hit the ground, your ankle jerked in place at the more urgent pace of the swinging rope. Your cheek was by now all loose skin and red swells from teeth marks, screwing your eyes shut, it all narrowed down slowly to the song.
"Little friend, little friend, now away you go."
"Make one last run for it, come on, youâre running out of time!" At the sound of Beomgyuâs shout, one last burst of determination despite all the exhaustion came from Soobin. Everything else felt numb, his feet already buzzing, arms swearing they might as well give outâhis grip became shaky, he knew you could tell. But he didnât let go.
The view on the other side often isnât one you see by your own efforts.
By the time you and Soobin reached the other side, pulled over by the grip of Beomgyuâs hand on Soobinâs arm as soon as he came in reach, he looked awful. Every ounce of energy was left behind each time the rope whirled around, breathing became hard as he wheezed for air.Â
The world felt almost dull, barely registering it by the time Beomgyu helped you down. Legs swearing like they might give out, Soobinâs knees hit the ground as exhaustion spread like a fever throughout his body. "Holy shit, fuck." And yet, every drop of sheer exhaustion was pushed away as he looked at Beomgyu almost pleadingly, pushing himself to sit on his heels. "Eun-seo, where is she?"
You never thought someone would love your daughter as much as Choi Soobin did.
He wasnât afraid to cry or show the overwhelming emotions anymore, a choked sound left him along with the tears the second Beomgyu adjusted her in his arms. He looked so painfully relieved, holding Eun-seo as if she was going to disappear if he let go.Â
Promises were slowly regaining their meanings. Maybe the promises that were broken in his childhood never were meant to be fulfilled, those promises were empty because the ones who promised him to fulfill their words never actually attempted to fulfill them. But through the effort of his own hands, even if it required more effort, that tiny spark was flickering back again.
"The game is over!"
    WHAT WAS WORTH MORE MONEY? The question kept ringing inside your head as Eun-seoâs gulping sounds echoed in your ears. She had been struggling to get a proper latch for at least ten minutes, by then, you were completely sure the remaining players aside from Beomgyu and Soobin were sick of the sound of her shrieks. Nothing would prepare you for how loud her cries would sometimes be, or how hard itâd be to figure out why she was crying. The room was vacant, so empty you could nearly feel the judging presence of the dead players. More than three hundred who were just seeking another chance at life.
"Congratulations to all of you who made it through the fifth game." This same greeting was getting old by now, but you were glad to hear it. At least because it meant you made it one more day. Making it through the week never seemed hard, even when you were in school. Now, a new layer of hell unraveled each time you woke up to play another game. "Here are the results of the fifth game."
"Do you think theyâll finally vote to get out?" Beomgyu murmured, head tipped sideways as his eyes locked on the piggy bank that came down. The light was far more overpowering now that empty bunks were removed from the room, it left all of you completely exposed. Beomgyu fought through these games just to get enough money to pay his debt, and yet, this amount of money would be enough to stay well off for the rest of his life. Especially if he invested in it. "Thereâs no way nearly six billion won isnât enough."
"One of the surviving players owes 10 billion, I donât know if heâll ever go against these games." Your body loosened further as you settled further against Soobinâs side, head resting over the soft thrum of his now calmed down heart. "I donât know about the others, though. Should be enough for them."
"In the fifth game, 16 players were eliminated. We now have ten players remaining. The prize money now accumulated is 44.7 billion won, and each personâs share is now 4.96 Billion won." You had never dreamed of having so much money. The word billion was enough to leave your throat dry and patchy, you once thought youâd have it all figured out with the money butâwhere would you even start?
"4.96 Billion won?" Someone questioned, the incredulity filling their voices. Something wasnât right. You quickly counted the players sitting down and spread around the room, there were nine. So why did the guard say ten? "Why the hell is our share 4.96 Billion won when thereâs nine of us?!"
"There are ten remaining players. Player 374, player 120, player 100, player 434, player 333, player 155, player 089, player 229, and player 454." The guard announced calmly, unmoving.
454 used to be Yeonjunâs number.
You felt your hands start to shake, there was no way they intended to make your baby a player. But as your eyes locked onto Eun-seoâs face peacefully feeding, you realized that morality really had no meaning here. If you were in the games, it means youâre a player.Â
"This is wrong! That baby is not a player!" Soobin scampered off of the bed, hand pointed towards you. How much worse could these games get? "How do you expect a newborn to compete? Donât you see how unfair that is?!"
"You said all players are presented with an equal chance of winning, her baby hasnât even opened her eyes yet!" Beomgyu was off next, chest rising too quickly like he was in the arena all over again.
"You are correct. But a playerâs physical conditions arenât to be taken care of by us, and if someone is in the games, then they apply to the equality rules we provide, making them a player." The guard replied without hesitation. Like a baby playing in a death game wasnât outrageous.
"454? Isnât that the chick that wanted to be a man? That player died during hide and seek!" Player 100 was practically fuming, of course he would be. He was the one who owed the most debt.
Sunghoon was staring so hard at you that you almost felt the heat of it burn through your skin. You couldnât tell if he was pissed, or if he pitied the situation. You had always deemed him as easy to read, but now, you werenât so sure about that anymore.
"That damn bitch is dead, and being dead means that money should be ours by rights!" Player 155 was already standing up, fists clenching as he turned towards your direction. "That damn baby has done nothing to deserve our hard earned money!"
"Thatâs right, weâve earned that money by risking our lives in the games!" Player 229 jumped in, pointing fingers at you and Eun-seo. You could feel Soobin tense next to you, but fighting all of these players would be hard if they decided that they wanted you and Eun-seo dead. "That damn baby shows up out of nowhere because this bitch spread her legs and came in here pregnant, makes it become a player, and gets to take a share of the money?! That just means player 434 will get double the amount of money!"
You reached into the breached opening of the pillow, hands twisting and pushing aside stuffing until you felt the sharp teeth of forks hit your palm. You wrapped your hand around the handle, if they wanted to kill you, then you wouldnât let them take you without a fight.
"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Another player roared, most of them now standing and fuming with rage. "This is outrageous! So if I die here, youâre going to give my prize money to a damn baby?!"
"My prize money is down by 700 million because of a baby? This shit is unacceptable!" Someone else roared, most players were already stepping towards you. Your stomach tied in knots, ready to whisk out your fork at any given time.
"Thatâs right! If that player is dead, then the baby should also be eliminated if it inherited that number!" The voices morphed, all of them going through stages of not accepting the new ârule.â But what was 700 million compared to 4.96 billion?
Human greed could rot anyone from the inside out.
It was why you were being bet on like horses.
"Damn right that baby should be eliminated! If the player is dead, the kid should be eliminated too!" They were animalistic, a part of you wasnât sure if these men were in their right minds anymore. "We have to kill it."
"The baby must die too! We canât let this happen! It has to be eliminated!" You pulled the fork out, never showcasing it as you pushed yourself off of the bed with one arm still cradling Eun-seo awkwardly. She started to wail at the commotion, already squirming in the podaegi. The players were already thundering towards you, Soobin and Beomgyu were standing defensivelyâwas killing in the arenas not enough?
"No way in hell weâre taking this nonsense!" Player 100 barked.
"Thatâs just a baby, what the hell are all of you thinking?!" Beomgyu roared, unsure of what was worseâgrown men deciding they should kill a baby for money, or these masked guards deciding a baby should partake in the games.
"This is bullshit! Hand the baby over, 434!"Â
You clutched Eun-seo tighter, pressing her against your shoulder as you brought your shirt back down. Eyes wide with fear, your mouth went dry. They looked wild. And the guards werenât even doing anything. Sunghoon was standing there, but he wasnât doing anything to stop the gathering of players. You werenât sure why you expected him to step up for once in his life. "Give me that damn baby! Hand it over or Iâll kill you too!"
A gunshot rang clean in the air, you flinched as your eyes snapped towards the guards. Eun-seo wouldnât stop wailing, you were yet to pick which sound was making your head hurt the most.Â
"Physical violence amongst players will no longer be allowed. It is our intention to give every player a fair chance." The metal doors opened behind the square masked guard, circle ones marching like programmed robots into the room carrying neat boxes. They stood in rows, nine of them on each side of the square mask, their superior. "To congratulate you for reaching the final game, we have prepared a special gift."
The gamemakers and guards alike called the suit you were given comfort, you called it bullshit. It was a piece of fabric meant as a slight taste of victory. The pristine white fabric felt wrong on your battered body, loose and clean as a contrast to the dirt and grime that clung to your skin like it had imprinted itself there. The fabric was airy, soon to be stained with blood if the games didnât stop today during voting. You fastened the bow tie around your neck clumsily, never being taught how to do it properly and left it crooked beneath the collar of the button up.
It was a nice change from the tracksuit that reeked of your efforts and losses in the arenas, discarded on the ground like a memory you wanted to leave behind. Eun-seo was tucked safely in the sink, already fast asleep. The woman that looked back at you, glimmering in the reflection, screamed survivor. But she wasnât you. A part of you, a particularly soft and empathetic part died over the course of the last few days. Dark circles appeared on your face, your hair was so matted you werenât sure how long it would take to untangle it. Your lips were cracked and bleeding, and you could barely even hold yourself up.
Hands splashed cold water on your face as you bent over, there was no one else in here aside from you. No other women. You fought to push down another wave of bubbling up tears, the sting of the cold water that almost felt like small needles prickling your skin washed away the tears that were now at bay. Your breath shook, trying to find a glimpse of someone you once understood so well in that mirror.
You found none.
It was no wonder people got entertained by you. Compared to your day one self, you looked almost as animalistic for survival as the other players.
You took longer than the other players to make it back to the lobby, but once you arrived, the room had already been quickly changed. You wondered how the hell they managed to complete these makeovers so quickly, but the dinner table set up at the center of the room with the wafting scent of a rich steak pushed away any other thoughts of wonder. The piggy bank was now on the floor, nearly filled to the brim with money. The circle center on the floor was checkered black and white, matching the coloring aesthetic of all suits each player received. Chandeliers with candles shining brightly with hues of orange were on each side of the piggy bank, casting a soft glow alongside the already yellowed out lighting over each table arranged neatly next to one another in a circle within the checkered expanse.
You took a seat on a table next to Soobin, Beomgyu was sitting across from you, closer to the source of money. "Maâam, please enjoy your meal. Your baby will be taken care of." A circle guard gestured towards the carefully crafted crib, you hesitated, but hunger and lack of nutrients made you so weak you couldnât help but comply.
You were ravenous. Gripping your spoon as you examined all of the dishes presented to you in a feastâKimchi, rice, vegetables in a blend of fried and boiled side dishes, perfectly seasoned meat. You had never been so glad it was mealtime.
"We have prepared as much food and drink as you could need, if you need more, please do not hesitate to ask." From the corner of your eyes, you watched as some players dug into their foods with their bare hands as they picked at the food. Some barely chewed before swallowing, simple dishes you could make at home became almost delicacies you could only taste in five star restaurants. The flavors burst on your tastebuds that were already complaining from the overload of sweet bread and plain food, real nutrients finally being eaten made a sigh of relief make your whole body slightly slump. You ate as if you were starved, because in reality, you were. This was the first proper meal you had in what felt like ages when it really was five days.
Despite the fact you were quick to fill up, you ate until you were stuffed. Your stomach couldnât handle much, not when you were fed as little as possible in equal portions. You didnât want to waste this. Eun-seo was being fed in an already warmed up bottle of milk by a circle guard, it was the first time you had seen these guards do something decent.
You wondered if beneath those masks, they regretted everything.
Soon, your stomach couldnât physically handle much, so you tipped backwards against the chair. Some were still eating as two circle guards brought out the voting machine.Â
"You will now take a vote to decide whether to continue the games or not. But before we begin, you will be given a hint about the final game."
You thought you were maybe hallucinating after eating so much, but a few gasps some players couldnât hold back at the words clearly said otherwise.Â
"In the final game, you will each get to choose which players to eliminate."
Your hands froze. This couldnât be goodâbut of course they would do anything to make sure the game was concluded. You knew that you would be the first to be taken out, you or Eun-seo. You were both the weakest in here.Â
"What? We get to decide who will be eliminated?" Soobin shook his head, never missing the malicious intent gleaming in the eyes of the players who had a circle patch on their chest.Â
"That is correct. If you can all agree which three players should be eliminated, everyone else will make it through the game." You cast your eyes downwards to your hands, trying to disappear to avoid the malicious stares directed towards you, but there was nowhere to hide. You, Eun-seo, and maybe Beomgyu had a chance of being voted out. Soobin was taller and bigger, Beomgyu could fightâbut he had clearly gotten on the nerves of most players here more than Soobin had.
âSo we just need to eliminate three people, and we get to decide who?" A player whose voice was filled with hope asked.
"In the final game, you only need to eliminate a minimum of three players." The guard nodded.
"You said a minimum of three players, but doesnât that mean more than three can be eliminated?" Sunghoon asked hesitantly.
"That is correct. However, the choice will be yours."
"So we can also decide how many will be eliminated?" A shaky voice peered up, your eyes shifted to scan over the speaking playerâ089. You hadnât paid much attention to him, hadnât had a chance to. But now, up close, it wasnât hard to tell he was scared.
"That is correct."
"Damn it. Explain this shit better, what the fuck are you saying?" Player 155 dropped his fork, quick to rise to his temper.
"Let me get this straight. All we need to do is eliminate at least three people, and we get to decide who they will be?" Player 100âs hands moved as he cleared it up, a broad smile painting his face.
"That is correct. Itâs entirely up to you to decide who will be eliminated in the final game. If you eliminate three players, the rest will be able to leave this place as the final winners." You took a sip of your water, forcing it down your clogging throat. They wouldnât vote to leaveânot when they could kill your baby and two more people and leave with a higher prize. "The vote will be held in reverse order of your player number. Player 454, please cast your vote."
Your eyes darted towards Eun-seo, who was already fast asleep after being fed. Gripping the fabric of the white table cloth with your fingers slick with some residue of sauce from the food, staining it below your fingers. "Canât I place the vote for her? Iâm her mother, she canât even speak yet."
"Bullshit! If sheâs a player, she should have a say of herself!" Player 100 slammed his fist against his table, you gritted your teeth tighter. You had never in your life wanted someone dead as badly as you wanted this man to die.Â
"That would be interfering with the votes. If player 454 doesnât cast her vote, then the vote will count as abstention." You swallowed down your urge to argue, watching the guard count down to zero from five.Â
"The vote is registered as abstention. Player 434, please cast your vote." Holding your breath and every ounce of frustration, you pushed through the pain with a tight jaw as you limped towards the voting machine. You didnât hesitate to slam down the red button, every ounce of rage towards these games placed solely on a single choice. Fuck these games, these guards, and whoever operates this shit.
It wasnât a surprise that the continuing players won, no one changed their minds. Voting was practically useless in this scenario when all of the choices were set in stone. It was a waste of breath and strength.Â
"Does anyone have any objections?"Â
"I have.." You quickly glanced at player 155, who now stood with his bowl of rice and shoved down one last spoonful down his throat with a triumphant smile like he had already won. "No objections. Now, can I have some more rice?"
"As you wish."
"Then, with no objections, letâs toast to giving it our best shot until the end!" Player 100 roared with a grin, and as they raised their glasses and cheered in victory, you were already retreating to your bed. Eun-seo was already in your arms, asleep and blissfully unaware. Soobinâs footsteps were quick behind you, closing the distance.
Faintly, the players who were confident of winning completely ignored the movements. Most were boasting, already offering to pay dinners in fancy places, go on trips in fancy first class flights. "Get me some more kimchiâjapchae too, hurry!"
"Theyâre going to vote me out." You stated, even though both of you already knew they would. "Ifâwhen they do, donât let them take Eun-seo."
"Y/Nâ" Soobin cut in, desperate to reassure.
"No." You bit sharply, despite the tears that already started forming, you still met his gaze head on. "Soobin, you have to promise me youâll get Eun-seo out even if itâs the last thing you do."
"Iâ"
"Promise me." You hissed. You had already lived enoughâ even if you hadnât even reached your thirties, a young life living from the start and with stability was better than you, who already was so scarred by life. "Please. Iâm begging you. I donât care if I die here, but I want her to leave. I donât want her to die when she has everything it takes to live a life I never got the chance to live."
The intensity in your eyes was overpowering, you had always been scared to die. But the irony wasnât lost on you. The fear would death would have to die to the blade of your instincts, of what was right. Soobin held your shoulders, shaking his head. "I canât let them get you."
"You have to." You pressed further, so fierce that your certainty made you seem untouchable. Maybe if you hadnât just given birth, maybe if you hadnât fractured your ankle as badly as you had, you would be able to fight during the last game. "Promise me."
"I donât have a problem with promising you to get her out, you know I donât." Nothing left but a mere weakening resolve was left in Soobinâs voice, his forehead pressed against yours while you were still hereâstill tangible. "If she leaves, youâre leaving too. Let me do that much."
"What if you donât leave either? Theyâll target us." The soft, tender cradle of Soobinâs hands on your face held you as if he was already mourning. Obeying you meant accepting you would die, following his own choice would mean he would die trying without the certainty of you or Eun-seo making it out.
"Iâll figure out a way, okay? I promise. Weâll all leave. Just trust me one last time." Heâs scaredâyou can tell Soobin is terrified. He doesnât want to die as much as you donât want him to. But you found that Soobin was someone who always looked at fear in the face and fought against it until he had nothing else to fear anymore.
You hated that he was like this sometimes. You wished that maybe he would just take Eun-seo and leave you. But he wouldnât.
Because he loved you. And being without you was worse than being someone swimming in billions of won.
"Weâll get out of here. Buy a house, maybe have a dog or two orâanother baby if you want it. Without the stress, just us." Lips hovering above yours, his hands steadied you. Soothing momentarily all of the worries that flooded your heart. "Iâll make it happen."
Even if youâd never last in your own eyes, you still kissed him back as if this was perennial.
  YOU LOOKED BEAUTIFUL under the soft glow of the lights, Soobin analyzed. Your body was drained from all the barriers and fights you put up, the lines of your face so tired but still unbearably breathtaking. The world around you quieted down, your guard lowered as you sought warmth next to him.Â
He wanted to experience this everyday. To wake up in the haze of mornings with your rested face next to his, to analyze you each morning until the image of you was permeable in his mind so he wouldnât ever forget how you looked like.Â
Even if he couldnât witness this, he still wanted to die with the lingering memory of you. He wanted you to feel this peaceful everyday.
Before bedtime, Soobin had already watched the players who voted to continue crowd up and start likely voting on who to eliminate. They would go for you, then Eun-seo, and the last choice was between him and Beomgyu. The gears in his head turned, sleep refused to grace him. He didnât have a plan to somehow get all of youâthe four of you, out of here safely. Especially when you were incredibly outnumbered. You were wounded, Eun-seo was a baby. It was him and Beomgyu against six.
"Player 374." Soobin immediately propped himself up at the sound of the guardâs voice. He stood there without a gun, there wasnât a way of him harming any of you. Either way, he didnât have a reason to. But wariness came naturally since they were in charge of killing you. "Thereâs someone who wants to see you."
For a moment, Soobinâs heart missed a beat or two. Chest tightening. He didnât answer right away, he let his eyes linger on Eun-seo as his hand tightened around the crib, then at you, how peaceful you were. Fast asleep, just relaxing because he was keeping watch.
"Theyâll be fine, itâs just a short meeting." Almost as if reading his mind, the guard gave a look at the fork that gleamed beneath your pillow. "She can defend herself, and they wouldnât try to get eliminated before the last game."
Despite all hesitation, Soobin found himself sliding off from the bed and following the guard in soft thumps of his feet. His mind was spinning with questions, from who wanted to talk to him, to what did they want with him. He kept his lips sealed, all the questions he managed to ask himself in the short time he walked around the facility were wrapped behind his lips. Heâd ask whoever wanted to talk to him instead of a guard who was following directions.
In a way, the guards were a pawn in these games just like each player who lived and each player who survived was.
The air smelled expensive in the elevator, a shift from the way the lobby reeked of survival and the constant sharp edge of frayed nerves. The elevator was colder, biting onto his quaking hands that Soobin shoved in the pockets of the expensive material of his tailored pants. The building shifted within every room, each one leading deeper.
The hallway was painted in black, not a single trace of anything colorful lingered in the walls. It led deeper, a silhouette being illuminated by the light of a lamp standing still and glowing, definitely as expensive as the shine it emanated, above a wooden furniture next to the leather that squeaked as the person who called for him crossed their legs.
"Player 374." The voice, despite being altered by something built within the mask, sounded expensive. Judging by the expensive design of the roomâthe paintings, the bottles of liquor arranged neatly by names and labels on a nearby stand, the soft jazz almost inaudible in the back let Soobin know what this was about. Who this was.
This wasnât some guard or instructor, no. This was the leader.
"Please, take a seat." He motioned for Soobin to sit down. Warily, he examined the room one last time. There were no guns, the guard who had brought him in here left with the clink of the elevator buzzing downwards back at the entrance that led to this room. "Have some whiskey."
It wouldnât be fair to poison a player, Soobin disappearing would make everything far too suspicious. If they were being watched, then the spectators would be upset at seeing him dying, assuming they enjoyed seeing him plead and fight for just a woman and her baby. Thatâs what you three probably were. His fingers wrapped around the cup with a force bigger than necessary, the liquid burning hot but soothing against his throatâdown in one go. Every move was watched, especially as he slammed the glass down against the table.
"What do you want from me?" His expression remained frozen despite the superiority that wanted to crush him, remaining serious. He didnât want to be afraid.Â
"Itâs about your future, her future, and the babyâs." The masked figure stated, at least Soobin had been right about what he was called down here for.
"Did you ever plan on giving us a chance to have a future to even begin with?" Soobin scoffed.
"Iâm giving you one now. Since as youâve probably guessed, theyâll both be the main targets by the unified players in the next game." He took a pause to let the gravity sink in, you wonât have a choice but to listen. That was what the underlying part of his speech conveyed.
"Isnât that what all of you want? Whoever is watching us play, isnât that the whole point? Itâs why you put a newborn baby in the game." Soobinâs voice was strained, full of barely contained anger. This was the man behind all suffering and crueltyâit was enough to put behind him all of his politeness and respect. "You want to see all of these greedy fuckers kill the baby and Y/N so you can laugh and cheer about their deaths."
"If that was my intention, then I wouldnât have called you down here and offered my help." The monotonous voice did little to stomp off the fire flickering in Soobinâs eyes, why would he want help from a killer after all this time?
A bitter laugh left Soobinâs lips, shaking his head. "Youâre trying to help us?"
He didnât get an answer, not in words, at least. The clatter of a knife next to the bottle of whiskey between them on the table was his answer. Black and golden, designed beautifully. It was detailed with half triangles on the golden parts, but the ones coated in black were smooth. His face paled.
"Take this knife back to the lobby and kill all of these trash who wants to kill you and them." He held his air, fingers tapping against his thigh. "But that means youâd have to kill the other man, too."
Of course there was a but. It was too good to be true. "Kill Beomgyu? You canât be serious! Do you evenâ" Soobin snapped, but was cut off before it could escalate further.
"As long as there are more than three players, the game is still playable. You canât have a winner with three players left, not in this last game." The man instructed, but never forcing. "Theyâre all fast asleep after a good drink and food. Slit their throats one by one, but do it quickly. No one will ever notice. Then, youâll leave with the money and the two people who are your priority."
Soobin could do it. He didnât mind shedding more blood for you at this point, but the thought of killing Beomgyu felt wrong. Beomgyu was the one who carried Eun-seo over the bridge, he wouldnât make it in time if he went back and forth to cross you over. Beomgyu was the one who helped you give birth, he was the one of the people he trusted to keep you safe during the pentathlonâ fucking hell.
He never truly understood why heroes thought too hard about the question of saving their lover or more people, but now he did. Either Beomgyu lived one more night to partake in the games and you four went against the six remaining players, or he killed everyone and fractured a part of your trust since you really wanted no one else from your close circle to die, or he killed everyone but Beomgyu, but then tomorrow, only one of you would live.
"Why are you suggesting I do this?" Soobinâs voice wavered for once, the weight of choice showing in his voice. He had a way out, but he didnât know what to do.Â
No other spoken answer. The air was taken by the sound of rustling clothes as the gloved hand of the superior reached towards the top of his head, sliding the hoodie down. Soobinâs lips parted in almost disbelief, pinching his palm to check if this was maybe a dream. It wasnât.
The mask slid next with ease. The sight was enough to make his whole world flip upside down.
Taehyunâ Kang Taehyun. He swore he died, you had told him that Taehyun died after saving Beomgyuâs life. So how was he here?
He lied to all of you all along. This wasnât the Taehyun whom Soobin knew, no. It was someone he used to know.
A flood of emotions crashed next, Soobinâs breath left too quickly in disbelief, he didnât want to believe that Taehyun was behind this all along. Then anger. Pure, hotânearly blinding. He leaned back, shaking his head as Taehyun looked at him straight in the eyes with no emotions at all. He had seen all of you struggle with his very eyes, and it was all a game to him. A lie to entertain himself.
"Mr. Choi Soobin." He greeted. "My deepest apologies for Kaiâs and Yeonjunâs death."
In a flash, Soobin grabbed the handle of the blade and removed the protective cap, the rage so explosive he could feel it thrumming within his veins. Beads of sweat formed without asking despite the lack of physical exertion, his teeth clenched tight. He wanted to believe this was a joke, maybe give Taehyun the benefit of doubt. But everything was tossed plain and simple right in front of him.
Still, his hand shook. Because this wasnât just the leader, it was still Taehyun deep down.Â
"Do you want to kill me?" Taehyunâs head cocked to the side, yet he wasnât smug. Just remained blank faced like none of this mattered. "Then go ahead, Iâm not stopping you. Itâs just you and me, no one to stop you." He paused, sighing. "But killing me wonât change anything, because someone else will take my place. And wanting it or not, the game will still happen tomorrow."
Soobin was tense all over, body quaking. His mind screamed at him to move, killâsoak his hands in blood. But he wasnât a killer, not like Taehyun was. So despite all of the noises of his mouth seeking breath and choked back waves of emotions, he remained impossibly still.
"And in that game," Taehyun continued, eyes unwavering. "Youâll have to fight the same motherfuckers trying to kill you and them."Â
Soobin hated that he was right. This wasnât just led by him, it was an insanely huge facility. Maybe Taehyun was just another pawn in a bigger game. So he sucked in a deep breath, lowering the knife and letting his arms sag despite wanting to see Taehyun dead.Â
He understood Beomgyu now. Why did he seem to want Taehyun dead so badly before the game of hide and seek. But now, that was coming back to get Beomgyu. He wanted Taehyun dead so much that now, if Soobin wanted to save you and Eun-seo before dawn broke, heâd have to kill Beomgyu.
"Once you kill all of them, you and them will be the only players left." Taehyun reminded Soobin, there were few people there to kill, it would be easier. Then, he was taking another shot of liquor. "You canât play the three stages of the last game and have a winner when one player must die per stage. Itâs boring to the spectators. Then, according to the rules, the game will end tonight."
Something in Taehyunâs gaze shiftedâa flicker of recognition, maybe something pleading before it died as quickly as it had arrived. "Just like she made you promise, you three will get out of here alive and with the entire quantity of money. You have my word."
Soobin remained grim, breathing hard as he weighed his choices, none of them had a truly good outcome.Â
"They will try to kill you and the baby tomorrow." Taehyun smiled for onceâsick, like he expected Soobin to stoop down as low as he had. "So kill them first. Thatâs the best choice you can make right now."
Without another exchanged word, Soobin turned around. He couldnât take a look at Taehyun anymore, or the pressuring choice heâd have to make. He still took the knife, just in case. But he wouldnât stay here any longer.
"Player 374." Not Choi Soobin, or just Soobin. Taehyun didnât know Soobin, not this version of Taehyun. "Do you still have faith in yourself to get out unscathed if you choose to not kill them? Get all three of you out?"
The question burned and stung more than it should. Because with every step towards the elevator, Soobin felt more cornered. He didnât, at least not at the given moment.
It was why Soobin stood next to the bed of one of the players, player 100. The one he particularly despised. The blade glinted and reflected the hue of purple, it would be a short death, pointed right at his throat. His snores would just become gurgles, but he wouldnât feel a thing. The time he stood pressing the blade to the softness of his skin felt like eternity, hands never ceasing the shaking motions. With a heaving chest, he still looked over his shoulder. Towards Beomgyu. He slept peacefully, he still believed heâd get out of here too.
"We should all have dinner together!" The excited words that left Beomgyu on the prior days rang like a ghost in his mind, making Soobin curse.
He couldnât do it. Not like this.
If he had to die protecting you and Eun-seo, if he had to make sure Beomgyu would also get outâ then he would do it. But he wouldnât kill someone who was why you had survived this far.
   EUN-SEOâS SCREECHING CRIES woke you up before the classical music you had already grown tired of did. You were dragging yourself to your feet despite your blurry eyes, sighing softly as you picked her up and rocked her. Walking around and rocking her felt like a punishment to your foot, you could barely even move. Still, you didnât have a choice. Even if your breath got sharper or your vision blurred with the pain that burst through you, you couldnât die because your body was giving up. As she quieted down, more players began to rise. This was your last day here, you would leave today. Even if you didnât, Eun-seo for sure would. Youâd make sure of it.
âThe final game will begin momentarily!â
The word âfinalâ made you almost burst into tears even if you didnât know if youâd leave alive. The mere fact that you made it through all six days felt like a huge victory to your battered body and weary mind, it was fulfilling to know you made it so far.
In the silence routine you had all established, Beomgyu carried Eun-seo up the steps while Soobin carried you. It wasnât much, but it spared you from any further agony.Â
This time, when you walked in the arena, it wasnât something glamorous. It was far bigger than all of the other ones, but it was poorly made. The walls had dried and cracking paints that faltered and stopped in places as if the room was left halfway done, it reeked of rusted metal and dirty water, making your nose scrunch and wrinkle as Soobin set you down. At the center of the room, three shapes stood tall like towering buildings of cities. A square, then a triangle, and lastly a circle.
You pushed your fork further down your pocket, concealing it from view as you lagged behind close to Soobin. You didnât expect to leave this game alive, but coming in terms with it was still terrifying.
"Can I have her?â You reached out for your daughter, Beomgyu hesitated as his eyes lingered on your ankle covered by the tailored black pants, but still untied the podaegi around his body and secured it on you.
âDonât worry, weâll keep you safe.â He whispered, features softening as he watched you hold the back of your daughterâs head.Â
âLetâs go.â Soobin ushered, still slightly tense from yesterdayâbut just because he hadnât acted on what Taehyun asked him to do, he still had the knife hidden. Just in case. It was nice to have some sort of advantage, it increased his chances of winning with the people he wanted to win with.
The doors of the rusty elevator shut with a loud noise, trapping all of you inside as it jolted, moving upwards slowly. You nearly lost your balance, knees bent far too much as you attempted to keep your balance. The smell was far worse here, stronger when you were cramped in a small elevating platform. It wasnât a long ride by any means, even though you wish it was. Soon, you were on top of the yellow square figure, high enough in the air that the fall would kill you from bleeding out but would make you suffer before you died.
âA warm welcome to all of you for joining the final game! The final game is called the Sky Squid Game. Here are the rules of the game: players will play on the square, triangle, and circle towers. You will play a pushing game on these three pillars, the first round will be played on the square where youâre currently at. If you push one or more players off the tower while they are still alive, all remaining players will move on to the triangle tower for the next round. Likewise, if you eliminate one or more players on the triangle tower in the second round, you will move on to the circle tower. The same applies to the circle tower, if you push one or more players off, everyone on the tower will be the final winners. Please keep in mind that if you do not eliminate anyone within the time limit, everyone on the tower will be eliminated.âÂ
You felt small under the scrutiny of the stare of the unified players, malice shot straight at you like you were prey. Still, you fixed your posture straighter as much as your body could manage, hid your fractured ankle behind your other one, and met them head on. You held Eun-seo tight, hidden partially from the men who crept closer by Soobinâs frame and Beomgyuâs one that pressed his arm to Soobinâs shoulder. You took one final glance at the height beneath you, making your breath catch. You never have been particularly afraid of heights, but since hearing so many skulls crack against the grounds and moans echo from the last game as players fell, heights made your stomach tie in knots.Â
You glanced over at player 089, he was the only one who had changed his mind about going on with the games. He wasnât in the alliance of the players that came together in a circle, moreover, he was shaking like a leaf. But that was on him, you couldnât stop for a second to worry about someone else when your own life was at stake.
âWho do you think theyâll try to attack first?â Beomgyu mumbled, fists raised even though nobody was lunging towards your direction. âTurns out weâre not the only target they have.â
âWeâre in a larger group, wanting it or not. Player 089 is alone, I think theyâll eliminate him first.â Soobin shoved one of his hands inside of his pocket, already tight on the handle of the knife Taehyun had given him the night before. âIt makes it easier for us.â
âI think heâs hallucinating, either that or heâs too scared.â Your brows pinched together, sparing the guy another glance. He was kicking air, sweat dripping down his neck. Even if it was quiet, from where you stood you could catch the quiet pleas that left his lips when carried by the air. âThen theyâll just try to kill me and Eun-seo.â
âPlease press the red button on the floor to start the game!â
At the beep of the button, your eyes locked with the timer that counted down from fifteen. These games built you from the beginning up to now to hone all of you to the point of animals, thirsty for more money and full of bloodlust. It wasnât a surprise they gave you such a short time.
âThey can try, but it wonât happen.â This time, Soobin didnât look at you while saying that. It made something grip your heart, something almost like impending grief mixing with helplessness. If Soobin wanted to go and jump off, you would be powerless to stop him. It was why you would have to count on Beomgyu to hold him back from doing so. âWe have to kill them before they try to kill one of us.â
So instead of looking at Soobin, you looked at Sunghoon. He was in the alliance, standing strong held by a pact that was only up because of the thirst for more money than they could shove inside their pockets. âWe should keep it democratic, it makes it easier for us to point out who we think should be eliminated and then vote on it afterwards.âÂ
âHe certainly sounds very educated, donât you think? Maybe it was a good idea to have a young man with our old selves. Theyâre always more agile and eager.â Player 229 laughed, swatting at his thigh. Sunghoon didnât acknowledge it, pursed lips as his head bowed slightly in recognition. This union was temporary, being smart meant you only made a pact when you needed something from it, but also meant slipping out of it as soon as things went south.
âAlright, then since we have a lot of time, we should probably start by nominating the ones we think should be eliminated.â Player 155âthe manic one with the smile you detested, crossed his arms. He was quick to look at you up and down, not at all impressed by how you met his gaze head on. If anything, you looked more like all bark and no bite rather than bite.
It was between you, Eun-seo, and player 089.Â
They turned towards you first, not him.
âI think itâs only fair we eliminate player 454 first, especially since we all agree that itâs unfair the actual player 454 died and she took his place, and on top of that, her mother has a bruised ankle and wonât be able to care for her properly like this. We can separate them from the two guys and push them off one by one.âÂ
You found that either they were completely stupid, or they didnât care about you hearing their plans anymore. You were ready to pull out your fork and attack at any given moment, but they were still on talking terms, so you could only stand and listen.
âWaitâ no.â Sunghoon interrupted carefully, a fake facade of worry plastering his face. What the hell was he doing?Â
âIf the games have to be played in rounds, then we should make it through the first round by killing the easier bait since it will be harder to separate the baby from player 434, we should kill the junkie first.â His body gave way to player 089, not much older than you and chubby cheeked as tears streamed down for no apparent reason at all. âIf we all want to survive, we have to play it smart.â
The exact moment all of them looked at the man, his body started to shake way more visibly. He stumbled backwards, but there was no use to it. He wasnât the strongest physically, you would feel bad if you didnât feel relief. It was the only thing you felt bad aboutâbeing relieved because someone else was going to die instead of you.Â
âWaitâwait, no. Please, letâs talk about this.â He stuttered, hands in front of him as he broke into tears, feet already nearing the edge. They probably wouldnât even push him off, there was a high chance of him falling off before anyone even touched, especially because of his withdrawals that were wrecking him hard.Â
âI know, I know. But just make it easier for us and jump.â The fake care in the voice of one of the old men made you grimace, if they were going to kill, why sugarcoat it? There was no point in it aside from making the cornered guy more frightened.
âI was just scared, please. Iâm so scared, I donât want to die.â He whimpered, hands shaky as he rubbed his face, practically drenched in sweat.Â
âYouâll have to push him off.â Player 229 ushered, tapping the shoulder of anyone in the union they formed that he could reach. They all turned towards 155. Tougher, clearly the most physically strong member. He visibly swallowed hard, the lump that had formed in his throat now forced downwards.Â
Being too overconfident was never good in games such as this.
âFine.â He stepped forward, chest puffed outwards to belittle the other. It happened in a flash when the tie of his suit was grabbed full of anger, but a deep satisfaction beneath it all.Â
âFUCK YOU, ALL OF YOU!â His voice echoed in the room, struggling against the broader player. âYou want to push me off, huh?â He puffed out breathlessly, crazed eyes meeting the otherâs. The roles quickly switched, fear flashed with anger in the eyes of the struggling man against the doe eyed, seemingly harmless player. Grunts left the pair as sounds of struggle mixed with them, but the players in the union just stepped backwards. âIâll show you that you were all fucking barking up the wrong tree!â
An union was futile when everyone would be ready to bolt when things went badly. With a burst of strength, player 155 managed to push the other away from him until he stumbled back from him. The first instincts were to bolt from the edge after accomplishing his task, go back to his union to focus on who to kill next. But player 089 refused to go down alone, grabbing the bottom of the manâs pant leg before he fell. Dragging him downwards.Â
It was a horrid sight. Your face scrunched up as blood spurted from player 155âs nose as he slammed face first in the ground. Faintly in the background, a skull cracked loudly, but you couldnât get a visual of the body, nor did you want to. Blood left his nose like a fountain, spreading everywhere as it dripped down his mouth. Some of his teeth flew outwards, the pain too great for him to even have a grip at the edge. You let out a breath you werenât aware you had been lacking when another series of bones snapped hitting the groundâsounding almost like firecrackers. Then, with a final sound of gurgling blood the man choked on, his body went still, existence now completely wiped from this world.
âPlayer 089, eliminated!â
âPlayer 155, eliminated!â
You werenât the only one freaking out, as a matter of fact, the unified players were freaking out more than you. You didnât linger when they started to talk amongst themselves, you focused on the small metal platform extending between the distance of the triangle building to the circular one. âLook,â You pointed, limping forwards until you could manage to have a solid grip on Soobinâs arm. âWe should go, if we stay behind and go last, theyâll probably try to push us off.â
âUnion my ass, theyâre just there because they want to kill easier targets.â Beomgyu scoffed, crossing the bridge with one more speckle of hope. Maybe surviving wouldnât be so hard when this so-called union was already crumbling. âIf we can badly wound one of them, wouldnât it just make them easier to kill one by one?â
âBut the problem is they wonât let go of the idea of killing easier targets, we canât keep them away but also attack at the same time.â Glances were exchanged amongst you, hesitantly, you pulled out your fork. It wasnât an ideal weapon, but considering no one else had a weapon, it was enough to create damage. Also taking into account you could barely hold yourself up to protect yourself, anyone who came close could be stabbed.
âDo what you have to do, I can manage myself.â You nodded towards the group that had already crossed the bridge, now uniting around the metal pole of the second tower to discuss in hushed whispers for once.Â
Beomgyuâs eyes went wide at the sight of the fork, but he couldnât resist the smile. âHoly shit, you actually managed to sneak this in? Where the hell did you get this from?
âThe kimbap.â Soobin recalled, he hadnât taken his. When he came back after the game the night after the forks were handed out, the bunks were already mostly cleared out, and his fork was gone. âThe one from a few nights ago, right?â
âIt was still stuffed under my pillow, a weapon even if itâs small is better than none.â Despite the rising hope, your attention was snapped back upon the sound of the beeping timer. You shouldnât have underestimated this union, those thoughts of them being easy to break apart dissolved like snow as you examined the neatly tied knots from the sleeves of the jackets tied around their waists. They tied themselves together and unscrewed the metal pole from the middle, aiming it towards you.
âThis doesnât have to be hard.â Player 100 raised his hands in a peaceful manner, but his intentions were far from it. âJust tie the baby to the pole and jump off, we donât have to make a big deal out of this.â
âGo to hell!â You spat, limping backwards until you couldnât anymore. For further protection, even if Eun-seo cried, you zipped the remaining space that you hadnât yet to cover her head. If you fell alongside her within the platform, then she wouldnât slip out. âIâm not giving you my baby.â
âDo you not realize how sick this is? You donât even have that much time left to live, why kill a baby?!â Soobinâs complaint deepened the scowls and frustrated noises from the group. They didnât want to die, at least not here. âDo you realize how bad that makes you look? Donât you feel bad?â
âThat baby canât even think! It wonât ever know that it once existed if it canât regain consciousness!âÂ
âIf you want them both, then fight us for them.â Beomgyu challenged, coiled to fight even though the massive metal pole left him at a disadvantage. In a split second decision, they hurled forward in blending shouts. You were moving away from the three men, keeping Eun-seo as close as you could as you limped your way away from the mess, trying to not get caught up on it.
Chaos burst through the not too wide platform, Soobin whipped out the blade Taehyun had given him, ducking underneath the striking pole that was aimed towards his head. Beomgyu went for the other end as the group moved facing separate sides, while also turning horizontally. The ones turned towards your way attempting to reach out for you. A scream of pain followed by flesh tearing open pierced the air, blood staining the metal knife as the pole swung clumsily towards Soobin once again, this time downwards. It closely brushed his shoulder, leaving a faint throb in a part of his skin that could have ended up being greater damage, but he managed to push himself off of his knees and stand up before it could have harmed him further.Â
âGrab the bitch already!â One of the men snarled, pulling Beomgyu in the round of players and tumbling him to the ground.Â
âIâll fucking kill you ifââ breath was stolen from his lungs, Beomgyu stopped speaking to focus on protecting his face from the kicks being landed on his face.Â
âJust kill him and take her already!â A frustrated, angry cry left another one of them, the one that was attempting and making feeble attempts at striking Soobin. One wrong twist of the pole scraped against the ground, and Soobin lunged forward with the blade, pushing his own chest forward until his body hit heavily against player 100âs own. The other could barely walk due to the open stab on his thigh, knees weakened, but refusal to die was holding him upwards. You forced yourself as away from the commotion as you could, even if deep down you wanted to go help. You would be more of a liability than of help.
âFuck, let me go!â The man screamed in panic, but soon stopped begging as Soobin dove the knife onto his back. Blood left his mouth and dirtied the once pristine white shirt, seeping down his hands as he pulled it out to cut through the tied jackets. He didnât kill the older man, no. With gritted teeth, he stabbed the man one last time so he would go pliant but not quite dead, only to force him off of the edge. He didnât scream, couldnât when he was already in so much pain. The only indicating sign he had died was the announcer through the speakers saying he had been eliminated, since the loud splat of his body against the ground was barely audible through the fighting players.
Beomgyu was being stomped on, the left over player that was alongside Sunghoon dropped to his knees to land solid punches on his face after prying Beomgyuâs arms away from it.
âThis could have been easier,â each word was punctuated with a punch, bruises formed along Beomgyuâs once fair skin, sounds of struggle leaving his lips as his body jerked around. The constricting hand on his throat made Beomgyu sound almost like a pained animal, it physically hurt to watch. But as you limped forward, Soobin shook his head. His lips mouthing âStay back.â
He was tumbling over towards the two guys already, an attempt to get them off of him proved futile as the jackets untied, Sunghoon pushed the player who had been too focused on making Beomgyuâs face fill with more of his own blood, using him as a shield to save himself from the tip of the knife that pierced the otherâs neck with a roar of pain that followed.
âYou son of a bitchâI hope he kills you next!â The man cursed despite all of his pain, slumping forwards after the knife plunged into his back one final, fourth time.Â
Sunghoon used his feet to push the now dead body towards Soobin, making him stumble backwards as the body was shoved towards him. Soobin stumbled back, arms swinging next to his sides to refrain from losing his balance. Once he regained his footing, he prepared to take one more lunge forwards, but halted before he even could raise his blade.
Beomgyuâs face was slowly turning purple from the lack of air, once confident punches becoming weak bumps of his fist against Sunghoonâs arm, a laughter cruel and confident all at once, keeping Beomgyu stuck in a headlock. âCome any closer and Iâll snap his neck. Put the blade down.â
Soobin glanced at you, then down at Beomgyu who was looking at him with tears already gathering in his eyes. Even if he didnât step forward, he would for sure asphyxiate him. âThen let go of him.â Soobin swallowed, raising his hands to the air in a placating gesture.
âI said put the fucking knife down!â Sunghoon yelled, whipping his head to the side to push his bangs from his face. âPut it down or Iâll make sure all three of them die.â
The blade clattered to the ground, clanging in three lingering sounds in front of Soobin, who was trying his best to seem unharming.
âKick it away from you.â
âWhat do you get from doing this? If you want to win, then Iâll jump off the next round. Just let them go.â A crack was eminent in his voice, genuine. Almost as powerless as you were.
âPlaying the hero again, huh? Is her taste in men focused on men who try to play the hero? Youâre only a pussy at the end of the day.â Sunghoon snorted, insults thrown carelessly, he had the upper hand. âYou shouldâve died. I shouldâve killed you the second I got the chance to. But I didnât.â A pause, bitterness fluctuating from both sides, just from different power balances. âDoesnât matter. Iâll kill you now.â
Amongst the conflict with Soobin and Sunghoon, you could manage out Beomgyuâs purple face and weakening body. You had to do something, he would die if you didnât. All of your thoughts seemed to lead to that single urge to save. Quickly, as silently as you could manage, you undid the knots that held Eun-seo close to your chest. You gave her a kiss to the forehead through the fabric, shakily setting her down.
Each shaky limp of yours lurking towards Sunghoon and Beomgyu made your heart miss a beat, you were holding your breath so tight you swore you could almost understand each squeeze of air being stopped from reaching Beomgyuâs lungs. The path was longer than necessary, teeth biting through the flesh of your teeth until the area became numb. All of you willpower singlehandedly focusing on making it through. You raised the fork, pointy teeth ready to strike the second you got the chance to.
âYouâll never see her again. You hear me?! You shouldâve never met her in the first placââÂ
A cry, mixed with so much anger and resentment you built up for months crawled its way out from the back of your throat. You lost your footing, knees hitting the ground with an impact that made you nearly double over. The fork pierced clean through Sunghoonâs skin, next to his neck as blood started to pool out of the wound. His words were cut, his grip on Beomgyu loosening as the other finally gulped for air, the color finally returning to his bloodied and battered face, breathing through wheezes of air and blood flooding to his nose, soaking his mouth.
âGo to hell.â You rasped, meeting Sunghoonâs eyes as he whirled around to stop you from striking again. âYou bitchââ he hissed.
You didnât stop, instead, you pushed the fork towards the center of his neck, blood drenching your face in sprays as you forced your eyes shut as strongly as you pushed the knife in. âI hope you rot in the depths of hell, Sunghoon.â
âPlayer 333, eliminated!â
Finally exhausting itself to the brink, you allowed yourself to slump backwards. Sunghoonâs body didnât fall with you, it was pulled and tossed to the side like a heavy weight by Soobinâs hands. âAre you okay?â
âBeomgyu.â You forced your voice out through the haze of exhaustion, attempting to sit upwards. âBeomgyuâ check on him first. Iâm fine.â
You faintly made out the exchange between them, the pain throbbing through your whole body was almost numbing, pushed to the very last nerve until it couldnât move anymore. Your head lolled to the side, catching Beomgyuâs bloodied face and split mouth into view. The timer beeping signaled the second round ending, Eun-seoâs cries filling the air soon after.Â
âCan you walk?â Soobin slid his jacket off, wiping Beomgyuâs face as carefully as he could manage. âAre you hurt anywhere else?â
âI can walk, yeah.â Beomgyuâs nods were quick jerks of his head, followed by the whirl of the extended metal platform towards the last tower. Eun-seo crying finally reminded him of youâ the reason why he didnât get choked to death in the first place. âThe babyâY/N, are they okay?â
âTheyâre fine. We have to go now, come on.âÂ
You had never been a big fan of goodbyes. Some goodbyes arrived painfully and bittersweet, just when you had finally gotten comfortable with the presence of someone in your life. Goodbyes meant you would see them again someday, or they meant that the person would be nothing but a faint memory of a face that would blur over as the years passed. You crossed it over to the last tower, but neither of you fought. Your bodies brushed together as you sat down, pressing the red button as it counted down from ten now. The instructions offered by the woman in the speakers was ignored, gibberish all of you had enough listening to.
âWhen I first survived,â Beomgyu began, breaking the silence as the time ticked. âI thought of myself as invincible. I arrived here with Kai, I wondered how hard this could really be. Even with everyone dying, I thought thatââ His voice faltered, you didnât even need to look at Beomgyu to recognize he was crying for the last time. âI thought that maybe I would leave unscathed.â
âBut youâre still here, you made it, Beomgyu.â Soobin comforted, but he didnât sound so convincing. It was down to the four of you, one of you would have to die. âWeâre all here.â
âDonât do this.â You shook your head, grieving before Beomgyu even moved to do anything. There was something extra painful about this goodbye, something that ached and burned like fire, spreading like a fever. There was a reason why you initially thought of this place as one of the depths of hell.
âIâll go, you have a lot to accomplish, Beomgyu.â Soobin finally breathed out, standing, only to be pulled back down.
âNo.â Beomgyu swallowed down his own tears, forcing one of his boyish smiles that had become his trademark at the beginning of the games. He wanted to go like Yeonjun did, with a smile. With peace and fulfillment. The money would bring him comfort if he won, but no money would be worth how much the deaths would torment him on a daily basis. âYou have a baby. A daughter, Soobin.â He shakily pointed towards Eun-seo, shuffling to stand. âGet out of here, take good care of them. Youâll be an amazing father, weâve all seen it.â A laughter left him, happy and carefree for once. âI want to go by my own terms. I want to see Kai and Yeonjun again, hell, even Taehyun.â
Soobin never told Beomgyu that Taehyun was standing behind the spectator glass inches above them, watching the solemn departure. Later on, he would wish he had. But the peacefulness and happiness in Beomgyuâs face was too much to be disturbed. So Soobin never shook away the illusion of Taehyun being dead.
âBeomgyu, please.â You kept jerking your head, refusing to accept it even if you knew this would mean all of you dying the second the timer struck zero. As selfish as it was, you couldnât find it in you to let go of him.Â
âIâll be fine.â Beomgyu raised his pinky finger towards youâa promise. Your chest burned, shaky hands raising to wrap your pinky around his. âLive well, enjoy your daughter. Forget this ever happened. And when the world finally becomes gray and you donât see it again anymore, I promise Iâll be the first one to greet you on the other side.âÂ
There was nothing graceful about the way Beomgyu stepped away from you and Soobin, nothing soothing about Soobin shaking as he held you tighter. For the last time, you flinched. The sound of Beomgyuâs body hitting the ground marked the end of the games, sacrificing himself for strangers that became his family despite being the one that wanted to live the most.
âPlayer 120, eliminated!â
âPlayer 434, pass.â
âPlayer 374, pass.â
âPlayer 454, pass.â
This feminine robotic voice would forever haunt you in your dreams and nightmares, just as the smiles of your once friends would.
     THE FIRST RAYS OF SUNLIGHT seeped from the curtains. Morning announced itself and woke you without the need of a timer, you didnât need those anymore. Your days were mostly spent without chasing around the clock, you didnât have to worry about bills as much, or about being chased down by men who wanted your money in the shape of your lungs. You stretched languidly, slipping off of the warmth of the bed to let your feet carry you towards the expanse of the kitchen, the soft sounds of the waves crashing against the nearby rocks, a soothing rhythm as the kitchen filled with sizzling sounds and the soft smell of neatly arranged breakfast.
You had never forgotten the games, it would be impossible. The memories would follow everywhere, sometimes they would overwhelm you and corner you in the darkest of nights, but they didnât bring only bad memories. You fidgeted with the golden band around your ring, a smile as soft as the atmosphere around you at the memory of your wedding.
There werenât many people, it was just family. Soobinâs mother managed to make it after he paid for her treatment, she was basically thrilled to finally have a daughter in law. She weeped and thanked you as if you had done her a favor once she learned Eun-seoâs name, which, speaking of, ended up being spoiled endlessly since the woman landed eyes on her. The front row chairs of your wedding held pictures you and Soobin fished out from the depths of the internet, three pictures of your once friends. A curt white veil was hung over the pictures in respect, their presence still there as you sealed until death do us apart with your lips against Soobinâs just a year after the games ended and everything clicked back into place.
You were pulled out of your reminiscence as warm lips met your cheek, arms wrapping around your body loosely as Soobin pressed himself against your back in a raspy voice he spoke in every morning. âYouâre up early.â
âOne of us has to make breakfast, Soob.â You chuckled, leaning back against his embrace despite your teasing. He still held you like you were the most precious thing in the world, still treated Eun-seo like she truly was his. Because in his eyes, she was. Warm hands slid down your body, settling above the barely formed bump. You had the surprise of being pregnant again three years later, and you had actually managed to enjoy pregnancy. Now, you truly understood why so many women said pregnancy is so enjoyable.
âAnd how is she?â He nuzzled against your neck, pressing a kiss to your warm skin that still had the lingering smell of the vanilla scent you liked from a body splash you favored.
âHow are you so sure itâs a girl?â Your brows pinched together curiously, his lips warm against yours in a peck, barely a kiss.Â
âFatherly instincts.â He grinned, reaching his eyes who became crescents, the dimples of his cheeks showing.Â
âDaddy! I canât turn off my sleeping lamp!â Your four year old daughter called from her room, almost as if she had been summoned by the conversation. âCome quickly, itâs a big big emergency!â
âWell, thatâs my cue.â Soobin left after another lingering kiss, leaving you alone to finish scrambling and salting the eggs on the pan.
Despite the fact most of your life was spent asleep, forcing yourself to be numb, you and Soobin managed to heal each other in your own ways. Once, you believed that the idea that love heals is dumb, but only because you never witnessed it or felt it. But Soobinâs love was so strong it made you feel weak sometimes.
Some things were ephemeral, like the presence of the friends you madeâthe friends you met back at the game that you wished were now in Jeju island with you, sharing a meal like you promised years ago. But some things werenât, some things like until death does us apart really were forever. And even if they werenât, being SoobinâsâEphemerally his, didnât sound quite so bad.
ÍâżÖ ÍàșŒ êŻ â Ś thereâs nothing to keep you from falling in love
i feel like I've requested something before ? idk, but heres one if i havent and another if i have đł
hueningkai x reader where they were able to go on a like week/two week long beach trip, and kai can't resist seeing reader in her tiny bikinis, and he cuts the beach day short, and he drags reader back to the house and one thing leads to the next ?
if you're too busy with your other fics, its okay, but thanks in advance if you can !!
áŽáŽÉȘÊÉȘÉŽÉą: ÉȘᎠáŽÊ!ÊáŽáŽÉŽÉȘÉŽÉąáŽáŽÉȘ x ê°áŽáŽ!ÊáŽáŽáŽ áŽÊ
êšïž ê±áŽáŽáŽ
ê±ÊÉŽáŽáŽê±ÉȘê±: Kai wants to enjoy his vacation with you: sightseeing, relaxing, bathing in the summer heat, but heâs a little preoccupied thinking about all the ways he would have more fun as soon as he sees your choice of swimwearâŠ
ᎥáŽÊÉŽÉȘÉŽÉąê±: NSFW, minors do not interact, established relationship, smut, sexual tension, Kai getting turned on a lot, kissing, praise, dirty talk, oral (f rec), unprotected sex, pulling out, cum eating, multiple rounds mentioned
loveeee this prompt so much too i just love summer and itâs so fun to write Kai getting all worked up like this >áŽ<
There are a few perks that Kai can think of to having vacation days away from being a famous idol demanded by everyone. One; his body is gifted with a well deserving rest after countless days and weeks of pushing it to its limits, breaking sweat after sweat in practice rooms to then sprint between schedules and complete comebacks with the utmost precision. It's much too taxing after a while and his body feels it too, some days he barely stumbles through the bedroom door to the comforted retreat of his bed. If anything needed a vacation, it was his overworked muscles barely hanging on by a thread.
Two; he can use the time to explore corners of the world he's never yet stepped foot on, places he'd never visit on tour so they'd be otherwise left undiscovered, the secret spots that serve the best dishes and the views that could only be described as otherworldly. It's all an oyster; begging to be cracked open and uncovered, cultures and languages and lifestyles he feels rich to experience an inch of.
Most importantly; he can spend his time with the one person he most craves to - you. Here, on this secluded island in the middle of the ocean, a world away from the responsibilities that tie you both down and away from each other, he has you all to himself. It's exactly where he'd like to keep you forever if things permitted. Just you, the gentle roar of the ocean as you both unwind your nervous systems from all stressful stimuli - and those tiny goddamn bikinis you insist on wearing that has his blood pressure skyrocketing far more than any performance, stage or concert could ever give him.
As soon as you'd stepped out of the hotel rooms restroom he knew he was done for. He thinks there'd be more material covering you if you wore a singular thread of dental floss, hardly anything of the cerulean bikini to cover the curves of your body, the supple flesh he longs to dig his fingers into and he'd hardly have to work at all to rip the flimsy thing from you.
He salivates at the sight of you unknowingly bouncing to the low hum of music you have playing as you ready yourself, bending to reach items from your case and he emanates a low groan, throwing his head back against the bed with his hands to his eyes, shielding himself from the temptation.
It alerts you immediately, snapping up to see him writhing on the bed as though in pain and you worry "Kai, you okay?"
He's not proud but the pitch in your voice makes his cock jump in his swim trunks, you sound genuinely concerned and all he can think of is how close your breasts are to spilling out the side, front and bottom of your bikini top, teasing his minds imagination to what lays behind the shred of cloth even though he's seen it a thousand times over. That's what makes this worse though; to know the sweet nectar of your body is concealed by such insignificant means and he isn't permitted to touch; you've told him repeatedly how excited you are for a beach day and you won't let anything stop you now you're here, minutes away from a tropical paradise so his wandering eyes will have to wait and he knows so.
"How do you expect me to keep my hands to myself when you look like...that!?" He regains enough mental fortitude to sit back up, a hand gesturing to your entire body and immediately you know the filth that's on his mind, you'll be having none of it "would you rather I wear a sweater and pants?" You scoff and brush your hair in the mirror, not giving him the satisfaction of observing his outburst.
But the mirrors reflection displays everything with the same clarity as though you were still facing him, with your arms hiked above your head and stretched a gust of wind would blow away your bikini and he thank it for it.
"Fuck no - I just... are you sure we can't just skip today and stay in bed?" You turn to him once more, a pout on your lips telling him how disappointed you are that the thought even came to him and all he sees is the way your lipgloss shimmers, wondering how it would look smeared across your cheeks as you swallow around him-
-"You know I've been looking forward to this, can't you behave for one day?" As though you read his mind, you softly chastise him for it and he whines once more "this is torture!"
You can only laugh at his pain, a thunderous expression on Kai's face the entire walk down to the beachfront and where you lay your towels on the sand under the shade of an umbrella. Despite the sun beating down, each of his features paints him gloomy like rain clouds rolling in; it's not often you see your boyfriend so sullen but he looks as though the sun has slapped him for even attempting to have fun and that just won't do. So you pass the sunscreen bottle out with expecting hands, met only with confused countenance.
Turning your back towards him and adjusting your hair to the side, he finally seems to grasp what you're asking of him and hopes you don't hear the audible gulp of his throat constricting. What you had expected to be an innocent task is nothing short of a test of endurance for him, if he can keep his blood settled enough to not rush straight south the moment he makes contact with your soft skin but you seem to purposefully make it more difficult for him the moment you untie the string of your bikini for an unobstructed application.
Now his mouth has gone dry, to add insult to injury the only thing holding up your top is your weak grasp, barely even clutching it to your chest and he can see how close you are to nudity even from the angle. Utterly dumbfounded, an almost primal reaction to the sight of you, hunched over and awaiting him he almost throws the damn sunblock away; you'll catch no sun if he's on top of you, if he had his way that's how you'd be right now, under him and the sheets of the hotel room. Instead you're glancing back expectantly, prodding him into action.
As soon as the chill of the cream touches your skin you flinch, mumbling something about how he should have warmed it in his hands first but all he can focus on is the way you react to his touch, arching each time he swipes across your hips, nothing more he wants to do than dig fingertips in and hold you there to have his way with you. He would if your position allowed for it, though a crowded beach isn't the place he'd like to create a scene or a scandal, that would be for just the two of you, behind the privacy of your rooms door.
"Thanks, baby. Turn, I'll do you!" Jovially you spin around, waiting for him to do the same. There's payoff here for Kai; he no longer has to resist staring straight at your barely clad body and neither touch you making it so much more difficult for his hands to not have a mind of their own. But now you're all over him, massaging the sunscreen right into shoulders so sensually it curdles his stomach, passing breaths to cool himself down. It'll be a miracle if he curbs heatstroke from your palms smoothing around his waist, burning hotter than the uv rays basking everything the sun touches.
It's over the moment you place a sweet kiss in the juncture of his neck where it meets behind his ear; pure, instinctual desire driving him as he flips you down on the towel beneath him, towering above with not even an inch of guilt when you yelp with surprise.
"Don't make me wait all day to have this... please" his head drops to whisper right where you had kissed him, replicating the same action for you but he lingers just a second longer than you had, intentional with his yearning in a way that spins your head.
Technically speaking, the two of you aren't doing anything explicit; his hands rest beside your waist at a safe distance and he's hovering above you, skin isn't even touching but it feels all too scandalous, so taboo to even be within his proximity when he's so headset on one thing and one thing alone; you.
You thought you wanted this day; to finally spend some well earned time relaxing with your boyfriend who works far too hard, to breathe in the salt air as nothing demands the two of you but the promise of a cooling dip in tropical waters. You still do, although now you think you're beginning to want something else a little more.
You want Kai, and he's making it clear he wants you more.
"We can't... here..." you're breathless as his lips ghost along your neck, testing the waters to how far he can go while it feels like all eyes stare at you because a guilty mind is a conscious one.
"Then we're going back..." the decision he makes for the both of you, sitting up and gathering the few items you had actually unpacked, the towels rested on the sand that he hooks on his forearm to save time folding them away and his fingers laced in yours as you trek the short distance back.
And again he wastes no time as soon as the door shuts behind you, carelessly discarding the beach bags to the ground in replacement for feeling you up, his hands have been far too preoccupied with others things for far too long considering this is what they desired all along, running up and down your sides to guide you against the closest wall. Adept fingers untie the pathetic string holding together your bikini, or lack there of, no use for it now as it falls to the floor. As delicious as it looked it shrouded from what he wants so he drops to his knees and hikes your thigh to rest upon his broad shoulder. With your core now inches from his face, there's barely a pause to feel shock or modesty, not with how he glances up to you, swearing you see hearts sparkling in his irises.
"Waited so long to taste you..." he can scarcely finish his own sentence before he gorges himself on you, tongue lapping up through your folds greedily. You yelp into the back of your hand, stabilising yourself against the wall with another flat palm as he ravenously licks, the wanton slurping sounds spilling out so treacherously obscene. This isn't the beachfront; no visual onlookers but with the rapid pace his tongue is settling with you're faltering every second to withhold squeals and shrieks from the neighbouring rooms to hear.
"Don't hold back... let me hear you" imploring, he knows you're reserving those delectable whines but if he has to he'll draw them out himself, wrapping lips and suckling around your bud. When he's gifted with the sweetest whimper, dripping honey right into his ears he knows you won't last long, especially not with how you're tugging at the roots of his dark locks.
"Kai...."
Rapaciously consuming, you struggle to hold yourself up with how he moves against you, holding onto him so tightly you're sure it's imprinting your fingernails into his shoulder but he couldn't seem to care, teasing his wet muscle against your entrance. Along with the ripples of his voice hushing against you, muffled with his reluctance to part you feel the wave of your orgasm wash straight through before you can warn.
"Tastes so good-my god, baby..."
More high pitched mewls of his name spilling from the tip of your tongue while his drinks up the rest of your release, reluctantly parting so he can get a view of your face, how fucked out - pure dazed you appear already and heâs barely started. You hear him playfully chuckle, glancing down but his eyes are still glazed with hunger âhope youâre ready for me-â
He wraps your arms around his shoulders for you to carry you to the bed, your legs would probably give out the second you took a step and he needs your strength up for what heâs about to do, resting you so gently against the edge of the bed and prompting you to lay as he climbs atop of you. His lips latch against your own in a commanding kiss, reeling you in until all you taste is the faint undertones of your previous release and him, swallowing moans as you feel his hands shuffle his swim shorts down between the both of you. Heâs far too impatient for much else and one orgasm should be enough to sufficiently prep you enough.
Youâd beg to differ; Kai knows heâs big but fails to comprehend the stretch each time, misremembering how much it takes for you to accommodate his size in the fog of his compulsion, pushing hips inside you with resistance.
âTight⊠so tight! Oh my god itâs so goodâŠâ blathering praise, he bottoms out and stills as you writhe against him.
âNeed more, Kaiâ heâs filling you up with painful constriction but you still beg for more; more tension and more friction despite the sting. An itch to feel everything. He kisses away the scrunch around your eyes from the intrusion, setting a slow pace despite what you asked for; it doesnât matter, you feel him all the same, every ridge of him pulling out to thrust back inside, nudging that soft spot so deep each time.
Your hands snap to the bed sheets beside your hips, tugging until knuckles turn white to hold you through the lunges as he dives into you, bed squeaking as the headboard knocks the wall âslow downâŠthey-theyâll hear us -â
âThe neighbours? Promise you they donât care, look around, baby. This is where everyone dreams of fuckingâŠâ you drop your head towards the balcony doors, still ajar from when you left and the fan of the palm leaves curtain your vision as the trees stand tall, aquamarine sky to rival the allure of the ocean you know lays below what you can see from the bed, the gentle breeze blowing through and the repetitive motion of his cock ramming inside you. This must be the closest to heaven on earth youâve been.
âLook so beautiful like thisâŠmore than anythingâ lips skimming along your neck with teeth tugging the string of the bikini top still clinging against you. Pulling your hips impossibly closer to dive deeper, nudging so far it feels like heâs in your stomach and your eyes roll, overwhelmingly full âgonna make me cum alreadyâŠâ
You feel it too, how he pants against your skin in breathless fashion, the slight stutter between thrusts to lengthen out the impending release looming over him. Though if you permit, heâll spend all day repeating the same promise to have you squirming underneath him.
âNeed it, Kai⊠cum for meâ like a siren call you supplicate your desire to him, inside or on you; youâll take all that he gives to you readily. Thereâs nothing to hold out for anymore, youâre imploring for it and heâs not one to withhold anything from you, the few last thrusts wreck you before he pulls out, leaning over you as he pumps his cock to release, he groans hoarsely as his cum paints your bikini top with pretty dots of white against the blue. What doesnât drip there hits your cleavage, dribbling down the valley of your breasts as you squeeze them together like a target for him.
âSo hot. So fucking hot!â His throat scratches the whine he passes, barely able to hold his stare on you but to look away would be a bigger loss, to not witness you desperately feening for every last drop would devastate.
âSo good, Kaiâ
You canât resist but swipe your thumb across your chest, collecting his seed to bring to your lips, wrapping tongue around the taste and he throws his head back in a whimpering mess, throbbing back to almost full hardness in an instant. He has no shirt to pull down so you lift to your elbows and grip the hair on the nape of his neck, pulling his attention and lips to you once more. Heâs perfectly content here, lost between the passionate kiss and your fingers gently stroking his locks, feeling the loss when you break away just slightly to murmur
âI hope youâre not done, you took me away from the beach day I wanted so much, arenât you going to make the most of it?â You teasingly pout, looking up with big doe eyes that only invite more and heâs your willing servant.
âDonât worry about me⊠worry about if you can keep upâ flipping you to your stomach, you excitedly giggle until you feel him lining up at your entrance once again, holding off movement until youâre pushing back in search of him. The sight fuels his pride, pressing chest to your back with most of his weight crushing you to the mattress. You donât care, you only want him to start moving again.
â-because after this Iâm taking you on the balcony, youâll see the beach from there and then youâll know for sure this is where youâd rather be, with me buried deep inside you, prettyâ in a singular thrust heâs filling you up to the brim once more, tears spilling past your cheeks from the new angle as he makes promise to not waste a moment more, pummelling so fast youâre already seeing stars despite the sun still hanging high above you.
Heâs right, this is where you wish to remain for the rest of your trip, even if you both leave more exhausted than when you came.
synopsis IF YOU LET ME STAY THE NIGHT, I THINK I MIGHT JUST HAVE TO STAY FOREVER â đ Ì in which you spend 7 days in cebu, and the fellow tourist you meet by chance makes it difficult for you to stomach the thought of leaving.
pairing choi soobin x (f) reader
genre fluff, smut, reader and soobin are both tourists, strangers to friends to lovers
a/n first fic on this blog kinda nervous :3 been feeling sososo much for my soobie doobie these days, my love couldn't help but spill all over tumblr. hi, new friends! âĄ
It seems as though the whole universe has conspired against you.
Standing under the scorching heat, you could not help but think that you should have stayed in the confines of your sweet, humble abode. If only Karina hadnât convinced you to, in her words, âStep out of your comfort zone, you homebody!â, then maybe you would have been 12 episodes deep in a new drama, or even getting your rank rating up in League of Legends.Â
Itâs hard to gaslight yourself that your trip to Cebu is supposed to be a cathartic experience when itâs all starting so horribly already. Not when you are fresh off a miserable flight with the person in front of you reclining their chair all the way. Not when some businessman spilt their coffee all over your pristinely white hoodie, mumbling that you should have stayed out of the way because he has a flight to catch. Not when you are all alone while everyone else seems to be having the time of their lives raving about the beaches and parties this place has to offer. Not when you couldnât even shoot a message to Karina complaining about how this was such a dumb idea for a raging introvert like you, because your stupid phone is betraying you and it canât catch a stupid signal.
And while you are easily irritated, itâs also easy for you to come to terms with the fact that you will be stuck on this island by yourself for 7 days. You tried your best to convince Karina to come with you, but she kept insisting that it was time for you to attempt solo traveling just for the experience. Easy to say for someone as outgoing as her. You huff, feeling defeated as you slump to sit on your luggage, waiting for a cab to take you to your hotel, when you catch sight of a man bickering with⊠a cab driver?
âWhat do you mean I have to pay a thousand pesos? My hotel is 15 minutes away!â
If you thought you were already the epitome of irritation, this guy was far worse. He looks like he just clawed his way out of hell with how messy his hair is and how much sweat heâs drenched in. Not to mention the bags under his eyes and how flushed his skin looks from how hard heâs keeping his annoyance within and oh god, heâs beautiful.
He drags his feet to walk away from the cab, eyebrows still furrowed, and you had to begrudgingly stop yourself from checking this stranger out because you do not want embarrassment to lace all the exasperation youâre feeling right now. You feel your cheeks heat up when you realize he stopped to stand beside your slumped form, sulking like youâve lost all your will to live.
âJesus, itâs so hotâŠâ you hear him groan as he types away on his phone. You assume heâs complaining to a friend because itâs what you would have done. That is, if you could catch a signal.
You giggle to yourself and he snaps his head to look at you, expression softening.
âTourist?â
Heâs talking to you. What the hell are you supposed to do when a man (who looks like he stepped out of a typical romance drama) strikes a conversation with you? You choose to face him, avoiding eye contact, and nod meekly.
He immediately whines. A behavior such a stark contrast to a man whose figure towers over you, âCan you believe that cab driver tried to charge me 1000 pesos for a 15-minute ride? My friend told me they overcharge tourists like crazy, so I should just act angry, but I guess Iâm not scaring them off..?â
You finally make eye contact with him, skimming over his features. Heâs handsome, but not in a way that suffocates you. Heâs⊠cute. Makes you feel fuzzy inside with his soft features. Round, wide eyes, nose slightly scrunched, and the way his front teeth sit on his bottom lip makes him look like a bunny who wasnât given enough carrot treats. What the fuck are you even saying at this point? Heâs just some guy. Okay, a gorgeous one, at that.
You clear your throat, âMaybe you should try an Uber?â
âUbers arenât available in the PhilippinesâŠâ
You nod, not knowing what to say. Youâve proven yet again that you are physically incapable of talking to cute guys.
âShit. Now my phone is at 1%.â
You snort, âIâd offer mine, but this dumb fuck cannot catch a signal.â
He sighs defeatedly, now sitting on his luggage as well, âArenât you going to try and get a cab?â
âI was going to, but after seeing you with that cab driver, I might as well just take a flight back home alreadyâŠâ
He chuckles. Even his laugh is pretty.
âMaybe youâre better at haggling than I am?â
He seems to be right, because the first cab driver you hailed instantly agreed to drive you for 300 pesos. You nod at the stranger while loading your luggage in the back, and he smiles at you in return. Youâre probably never going to see each other again. So much for a short-lived airport crush.
You fall back onto the expanse of your bed once youâve checked in, relishing in the comfort after a pain-staking flight. Stretching your back, youâre relieved to find that the hotel wi-fi works like magic, finally satiating your need for chronically online personal time. After a few moments of scrolling through your feed to see what youâve missed, you grew bored, pressing the call button beside Karinaâs contact name. Her face lights up your screen immediately.
âYah! Why are you on your phone instead of the beach? I just saw you repost a Tiktok 5 minutes ago!â
You roll your eyes, âCanât a girl replenish her social battery before going out and about all alone?â She simply chuckles, giving you an avenue to start complaining to her about all the mishaps that have happened so far. You drone on and on until youâve lost track of all the time you spent just grumbling over every inconvenience, and she reassures you that maybe you used up all your bad luck, and from hereon, everything will fall into place smoothly. You aspire to be as optimistic as she is. Soon enough, she yawns, saying that itâs time for her afternoon nap, and youâre left to scurry over to the bathroom to freshen up.
Itâs 4PM when you step out of your hotel room, padding over to the lobby to ask for the pathway to the beach, when you catch sight of a familiar tall figure hunched over the receptionist desk. He seems to feel your presence, because he snaps his head towards you.
âHuh? Oh!âÂ
Itâs the cute guy from the airport. You swear youâre going to get a heart attack.
âO-oh? Hey,â you try to muster out. You really, really suck at talking to cute guys.
He smiles, âDidnât know you booked the same hotel! We could have shared a cab, then.â
âWould be weird to tell a complete stranger which hotel I booked, right?â You didnât mean for the words to trail off your mouth quite harshly, really, but your realization hits you too late when his face flushes in panic as he responds. âA-ah! Yeah! I suppose it would be really weird. SorryâŠâ
You glance over at the receptionist desk to see that there was no one manning. Great. Now you canât weasel your way out of this awkward situation.
âUh⊠I was going to ask the receptionist where the pathway leading directly to the beach was, but I guess thereâs nobody here?â
Heâs shocked. Itâs almost animated how his expressions are painted on his face. âI was going to ask them too! Iâve been waiting for about 10 minutes now, but I have no idea where the receptionist has gone, soâŠâ He trails off, and maybe itâs the impatience getting to your head, so you ask,
âYou want to just fuck it and find it ourselves?â
He looks at you, and for just a moment, youâre terrified. What if he thinks youâre hitting on him? Wanting to spend time alone with a hot guy? You almost think youâre fucked until he flashes a grin.
âIâm already itching to get my feet in the sand.â
And thatâs how you find yourself walking side by side with him. You learn that his name is Soobin, and that heâs from South Korea, working in corporate like you. Soobin tells you about his friend that was supposed to come with him, but he booked his flight incorrectly in an absentminded haze, thus he was traveling solo. You tell him that your friend practically had to bribe you into going on this vacation because of all the stress you have bottled up from your miserable job. He lets out a giggle, saying that he needed to get away from his laptop screen given that even typing was giving him a migraine.
Despite your closed off nature, it was surprisingly easy to fall into a conversation with Soobin. Maybe you enjoyed the conversation a little too much, because itâs only then that you realize youâve been going around in circles, still not finding the beachside.
âDo you think weâre lost?â
He turns over to you and stops in his tracks, smiling sheepishly. âMaybe?â
And then it hits you. Youâre lost. God knows where you are, and youâre stuck navigating your way back with someone you met less than 5 hours ago. Did you really put your guard down for a stranger?
âShit,â you pull out your phone, only to be reminded that itâs practically useless. It doesnât help that youâre in a dead zone. You see him fiddling with his phone, seemingly to find a way to map yourselves out of this, but he was met with disappointment upon reading the words âno cellular serviceâ.
You groan, wanting nothing but to go back to your hotel room to curl up in your bed, but Soobin was still adamant on finding the beachside. Unfortunately for you and your aching legs, you had to choose between dragging yourself sluggishly or having a tantrum in the middle of nowhere. The latter was a no-go, obviously, unless you had a death wish?
The fatigue and anxiety were catching up to the both of you as dead silence remained in the air, save from the small huffs you were letting out occasionally. Soobin glances at you from time to time, seemingly to check on your pathetic state. The sun was starting to set, and youâre certain you were going to make it to the headlines as the 25 year-old woman who (a) perished in extreme fatigue and irritation, or; (b) got brutally murdered by a bunny-looking stranger twice her size.Â
You donât notice that you were looking at the ground, questioning every life decision that has led you to this absurdity, when Soobinâs awed gasp snaps you back into reality.
âHeolâŠâ
You look up to see a breathtaking view, all yours to behold. The sun was setting in the horizon, etched in the apricot sky. Palm trees breezed through the path, and the salt in the air barely grazed your tongue. Soobin has his mouth agape, eyes full of wonder. Okay, maybe heâs not a serial killer out to murder you if he brought you to such a beautiful part of the seaside. Unless this is all part of his grand scheme to let your guard down? But he looks clueless as he can be, perhaps you were more likely to be the murderer in this situation.
âCome! Thereâs no one around!â Soobin hurriedly waddles over to a spot just below the trees, inviting you to join him. Once youâre sat beside him in the sand, he stretches the entirety of his legs, letting out a hum of relief. He has a stupid smile on his face as his eyes glaze to take in the golden hour.
âIâm sorry I got us lost. Iâve never been good at directions,â Soobin smiles apologetically. âBut hey, this view is nice. We have this all to ourselves.â
No one was around. Okay. Maybe this is the part where he brutally murd-
âI hope youâre not too tired. I⊠kinda heard you huffing a lot earlier and I figured you were getting antsy. Also it was probably because you were lost in god knows where with a dude you just met, so that must have been scary for you? I canât convince you that Iâm completely harmless because that would make me more suspicious, right? And oh god why am I rambling?â Heâs melting into a puddle of embarrassment. Usually, you liked it when men learned to shut the fuck up, but you tolerated his rambling. He was quite⊠endearing, actually.
You let out a small chuckle, âSoobin, itâs fine. Weâre chill. I was just tired of walking in circles, thatâs all.â He sighs in response, fingers tracing shapes in the sand.
âThe view is beautiful though. Iâm kinda glad we got lost. We can gatekeep this experience,â you add, shooting a reassuring smile. Now you feel bad for ever thinking ill of him, because the way he perks up and grins at you just seals the deal that he was never a threat. Soobin turns away to continue watching the sunset, basking in the way the sunâs rays kiss his skin.
Time flew by too fast, and now youâre left with the problem of how youâre supposed to go back to the hotel, when a light suddenly beams at the two of you.
âHey! This is private property!â Fuck. No wonder there werenât any people around. The two of you get escorted out, with the security guard huffing about how âkids these days just fool around everywhereâ, to which you and Soobin turn crimson profusely. You had no choice but to push your luck, asking him the way to your hotel no matter how embarrassed the pair of you were.
âOkay⊠that was humiliating,â you cringe and glance over at Soobin, who was not faring any better than you. His cheeks were still puffed out, teeth nibbling at his bottom lip.Â
âKinda feels like weâre trauma bonded now,â he mutters, praying that this time around, you were going the right way. âTrauma bonded over a humiliation ritualâŠ. today felt too long.â
You hum, âYep. Might have to skip dinner. I just want to sleep and stock up on social battery for the next 6 days.â
His eyes widened, âWow. We have the exact same hotel and trip duration.âÂ
You nod, not knowing what to make of this new knowledge, but all the rummaging in your brain was instantly cut off by him.
âDo you, perhapsâŠâ His voice turns small. âPerhaps youâd like to stick together?â
âA whole week together? You might get sick of me.â
He grins, âWell, if by chance I do, it would be totally fine. Weâre most likely never going to cross paths with each other again anyway.â
You donât know what compels you to, but you agree.Â
You hope Karina would be proud of you stepping outside of your comfort zone (and trusting that some guy doesnât offer you as human sacrifice.)
The next few days went by like a dream.Â
On the second and third day, Soobin took you ziplining and leaping off waterfalls despite your protests. You remember how your heart skipped a beat at his proud, child-like grin when he got you to admit that facing your fear of heights ended up rather enjoyable. The day after, the pair of you decided to take a break from the adrenaline and wandered off to the cultural spots Cebu had to offer. You didnât expect him to take such good shots of you, worthy enough to be posted on your wilting Instagram account. Karina had even bombarded you with question marks, asking if youâve finally made a new friend. Imagine her shock when you sent her a selfie you had taken of the two of you, and she found out your new âfriendâ looks like he stepped out of a manhwa.
By the end of the fifth day of your escapades with Soobin, you had suggested trying out the beachside bars your Tiktok algorithm was raging about. It seems like Karina had magic senses, because your phone suddenly chirped with a text notification while you added finishing touches to your makeup.Â
rina<3: u crack cebu boy yet?
You furrow your eyebrows at this.
: huh
: weâre FRIENDS
rina<3: and heâs ur exact type
: well yes
: but it would be weird to get in a random strangerâs pants
rina<3: dude thatâs exactly why
         : u can just leave it behind
         : what happens in cebu stays in cebu type shit
         : esp if hes bad in bed đ
: you are soâŠ
: what if i catch something from him
rina<3: feelings?
          : oh u meant an std
          : i snooped through his instagram and mans looks bitchless anyway
          : his following list consists of league gameplay accounts and 4 of his friends
: ugh idk man
: i justÂ
: hes hot but
: iâd rather not put weird thoughts in my head about a dude iâm spending the remaining days with
rina<3: LMAO itâs okay iâm playing
          : just sayin u only live once
          : and iâve prayed hard for u to finally get laid again
          : especially after ur ugly ass ex
          : and donât tell me u havenât snooped through his ig either
: ?
: i have but
: just out of pure curiosity
rina<3: love when u get defensive
          : u in bed alrdy? do u wanna call and catch up
          : im yearning for my best friend
: awww iâm going out
: trying the beachside bars
rina<3: oh? đ
          : enjoy <3
          : hoping u break ur vow of abstinence
: ????
: love you
: iâll call u tomorrow evening maybe
Karina sends a heart and a wink in response, making you smile and shake your head
Looking at yourself in the mirror, you adjust a strand of your hair and suddenly become antsy. All those talks about Soobin suddenly made you feel hauntingly self-aware. You hate to admit that you wanted to look pretty to him. Life has a way of making things fall into place so perfectly, because not long after your frustrated fussing, you hear three knocks on your door. Soobin.
You pad over, opening your door to see Soobin standing in true, awkward, painfully endearing Soobin fashion.Â
His eyes fall on your face, drifting just a millisecond to your bikini-clad and sheer covered body. You barely miss the way his cheeks burn despite the cold air from your room.
âYou look-â he starts, but cuts himself off. Alarms blare in your head. Look horrible? A mess? You look like you tried to get all pretty for me but absolutely failed?
âLook what?â you squeak out, voice small. He scratches his neck, as if debating what words to say. Youâre painfully fretting over every possible response until he eventually mumbles something after a few beats.
âYou look beautiful.â
He says it so sincerely it makes your head spin. But alas, Soobin is SoobinâŠ
âNot in a creepy way! The color of your outfit just fits you really well. And the way you did your hair and makeup is pretty cool. And-â
You shush him, trying to calm your heart that is about to beat out of your chest, âItâs fine, Soobin. You donât look too bad yourself.â
Awkward silence then envelopes you in the warmly lit hotel hallway, both of you not daring to meet each otherâs eyes.
You were the one to break the stillness, âLetâs go?â, to which he hums in response. He looked like he had much more to say, but you donât dare to pry him on his thoughts in fear of further straining the situation.
One thing you liked about spending time with Soobin is how the two of you go well together. Platonically, you swear. It isnât even five minutes deep into the walk together when youâre back to telling each other mundane stories about your lives back home. Soobin whines about how he misses his dog, Tori, to which you reply âso sheâs far better company than me?â, causing him to ramble in panic. You, in turn, tell him about how you donât want to come back to office paperwork when youâve been having the time of your life getting your feet in the sand all day.Â
âI wish we could stay here forever,â he sighs, seemingly in a haze as the night breeze grazes his hair. âItâs been really fun just doing anything and everything with you.â
You take the chance to finally, actually look at Soobin. He towers over you, looking you straight in the eye like he doesnât know your heart is about to beat out of your chest every time he does so. His hair is messy from the wind, the outline of his face perfectly chiseled by the moonlight gracing his skin.
In that moment, you know something starts shifting between your feelings and your ever-so rational mind. You canât help it. Not when heâs looking at you like you hung up the moon. Not when his beauty is one you would only find once in a lifetime.
Youâre done for.
Despite this, you push your thoughts down your throat, managing to whisper, âIâll really miss you when we go our separate ways, you know?â
He chuckles, âBecause Iâm the only male friend you have that actually takes good photos of you?â
âYour words, not mine.â
He beams teasingly before adding, âIâll miss you too. A lot.â
Suddenly confronted with the vulnerability of your words, you tear your eyes away from him and start kicking sand beneath your feet, âI donât know why I got sappy, sorry. I still have 2 days with you.â
âItâs cute,â Soobin reassures you. As a friend would, right? You donât want to overthink it. âI never would have thought weâd warm up to each other so fast, but maybe I was meant to meet you on this trip.â
âJust so you have someone to buy you vinegar for your jellyfish stings?â
âThat, and we make quite a good pair for people who only met at the start of this week.â Your heart feels like itâs being tugged from all sides, painfully reminded of the fact that youâve grown attached to him in such a short period of time.
Right. You really shouldnât get too attached to someone who will be an ocean away by the following week.
Your forlorn musings are interrupted by the chants of people that cut through the bubble you and Soobin have placed yourselves in. He flashes an ever so sweet smile at you, taking your hand in his.
âYou ready to get absolutely shitfaced?â
The world is spinning before your eyes.
âSooooobieeeeâ you slur out, arm snugly wrapped around his. âLetâs drink more!â
You donât know how much alcohol is flowing through your bloodstream, but it was enough for you to cling into Soobin like he was the only thing keeping you grounded. Literally. If it werenât for him, you would have fallen face flat into the ground.
He squeaks, âNo more! Youâre red all over!â
âAnd youâre not!â you pout, âItâs like Iâm the only one having fun!â
You would have thought he was starting to get sick of you if it werenât for his grip tightening before he says, âIâm having fun. But-â
âSoobin. Soobin. Iâm going to throw up.â
He mutters a profanity in his native language, dragging you up so gently and guiding you somewhere your inebriated mind couldnât fathom. Itâs only when you breathe in the stench that you piece out that he had taken you to the bathroom (more specifically, the line of people leading to it.)
âDonât barf on me, please,â Soobin practically begs, rubbing circles on your back as you lean further into his grip, dopey smile plastered on your face as you admire him from the angle below.
âYouâre really, really, reallyyyy cute, Soobie,â you squeeze the bicep youâre clinging onto, making the man shriek in surprise. âHow are you even real?â
He chooses to look away from your eyes that keep raking all over him, cheeks now a carmine red.Â
âI told you earlier that you didnât look too bad yourself, but I wanted to tell you that you looked absolutely fucking beautiful. Far prettier than me. Even though I spent so long trying to look cute for you,â you stumble over your words as he keeps his hold on your waist. You donât even notice that it was your turn to enter the bathroom when he sighs and escorts you inside, oblivious to the stares you got from stepping inside together.Â
He positions you so that youâre hunched over the toilet, his annoyingly long legs folded to keep you at eye level while he bunches your hair up. As your drunkenness wills, you expel the intoxication out of your system as Soobin wipes the sweat off your face and neck. When all is done, you look at him and weakly ask for toilet paper to wipe your face with, to which he takes it upon himself to do it for you, gingerly padding over your mouth and tear-stained cheeks.
âAll okay?â Soobin asks as he throws the toilet paper away and tidies up the bathroom the best he could.
âMhm,â you purr, latching onto his arm as he opens the door, receiving pointed stares from the people witnessing you step outside together. You were all oblivious to it, wanting nothing but to curl up into the heat his body tenders. Heâs silent as you stumble over your feet, and yet he traces his arm back around your waist once more.
âWhere are we going?â
âIâm taking you back.â
âBut you havenât even drank that much yet!â
âIâm not a heavy drinker.â
You sulk as he maneuvers you all the way back to your hotel room.Â
When he sets you down on the bed, your frown only gets deeper. Heâs immediately rummaging through your bathroom, hurriedly asking where your cleansing wipes are before you succumb to slumber, and returns to your side albeit not telling him where it was. Itâs funny, really, the way you could see yourselves falling into this routine in the future. A future that seems so out of reach, if only you wouldnât be miles away from each other when all this is done.
âStay still,â Soobin whispers, as if terrified of breaking through the air of tenderness sifting through your hotel room. He holds your face so delicately as he drags the makeup off of your lethargic state. Heâs merely inches away and yet he seems so far from your reach.Â
âSoobin,â you let out, almost a pained, yearning whimper. You feel his fingers tremble against your cheek before he resumes his ministrations with a simple hum. âYouâre even prettier up close.â
Maybe itâs the liquid courage. Maybe itâs all those talks with Karina. Maybe itâs the rare occurrence of you acting according to impulseâ but you close the distance between the two of you, letting out a contented sigh as you feel his plump lips against yours.Â
The problem is Soobin stays unmoving.
You pull away, shame overcoming the entirety of your system.
âSoobin, Iâm sor-â
âGood night,â he replies curtly.
All inebriety has fallen out of the window as you lay down, pulling the sheets all over yourself. You pray this was all just a dream. That you had actually dozed off as he was busying himself on tidying the makeup off your face.Â
The last thing you hear before sleep overcomes you are his faint footsteps and the clicking of your door.
page.soobin: let me know if youâre awake
                     : i bought painkillers for you
                     : iâll come by then
Itâs half past 3 in the afternoon when you awake from your slumber, groaning as you curse yourself for drinking like a maniac the previous night. You simply blink at Soobinâs texts, about to reply when you recall all the humiliation you put yourself in.Â
Fuck. Fuck. Youâre fucked.
page.soobin: you awake?
                     : you have read receipts on by the way
Great.
: i just woke up
: itâs fine i can manage
: you donât have to come over
page.soobin: stop
                     : at least let me take care of you
: iâm okay, soobin
: i swear
page.soobin: iâm still dropping by
                     : elevator rn
It all happens so quickly. One second youâre grimacing at the thought of seeing him in your disheveled and oh-so dreadfully humiliated state, and the next youâre opening the door for him. Heâs dressed in a baggy shirt and shorts, hair disheveled as if heâs been running his hands through it the whole while.Â
âYou should have gone out instead of worrying about my hungover,â you grumble under your breath, eyes not daring to land on him.
âGo out? Without you?â He says it like nothing significant happened between the two of you just hours ago.
âYeah, I donât know about thatâŠâ
Soobin puffs out a breath heâs been keeping for God knows how long.Â
âListen-â
âWe donât have to talk about it, Soobin. Iâm really sorry. We should just forget that ever happened and just go our separate ways for the rest of our days here.â
Your mind is in shambles as he stares blankly, debating what to say next.
âPlease look at me.â
You canât deny his request when his voice sounds like itâs about to break. When your eyes meet for the first time since last night, everything just comes crashing out on you. Heâs staring so intently, you fear youâll break upon his gaze.
âDid you mean it?â
âMean what?â
âThat you find me beautiful,â he pauses before adding, âThat you tried to look pretty for me.â
You grimace at his prodding. âWhy would I not mean it?â
âYou were drunk.â
âJust because Iâm drunk doesnât mean Iâm lying.â
Just like that, another awkward silence falls upon you. You could only hear his shallow breaths, like he was holding himself back. You pray he doesnât hear the buzzing in your brain.
âI wanted to kiss you,â he professes matter-of-factly.
âYou didnât kiss me back.â
âI didnât want our first kiss to be of us being drunk.â
Youâre dumbfounded as you took in his feverish appearance.Â
âSo, if youâll let me,â he murmurs, âIâd like to have a do-over.â
This time, it wasnât you who closed the distance between your lips. In a matter of seconds, all of you is filled with him. Soobin. Soobin, who didnât want to make a move in fear of you not reciprocating. Soobin, who was patient enough to care for you in the most minuscule of ways. Soobin, who you have at the palm of your hand, giving you himself wholeheartedly. Soobin, who has yearned for you all this time.
His soft lips glide against yours so smoothly, his hands eventually slotting around the curve of your waist to pull you in closer. Kissing him felt like coming home. Pressed up against him is where you wanted to be forever.
Soobin pushes you to lay on the bed, with him following suit. Heâs careful not to put his whole weight on you, but even so, you feel suffocated by the affection bubbling within you. Heâs all yours, albeit just for this moment.Â
âSoob,â you manage to mewl out against the kisses he is peppering all over your collarbone.
âYou alright, baby?â The endearment is enough to make your legs buckle around his waist, wanting to pull him in closer.
âMore than alright,â you gasp as he grazes his teeth against your neck, leaving love bites. âI just canât believe youâre mine today.â
He furrows his eyebrows, halting his actions, âToday?â
âToday,â you frown. âLast full day together and weâre back to our old lives.â
His eyes soften immediately, brushing the strands of hair from your face before he speaks, âIt doesnât have to be just today. Iâm yours evermore.â
âBut-â
âIâll visit you every now and then. You can show me around your hometown, and Iâll fly you out to mine,â he traces his finger against your cheek, âAnd then youâll meet Tori. I swear youâll fall in love with her. And weâll have all the time to ourselves.â
You snicker, âDo you say that to the girls back home too?â
Soobin chuckles in response, a low humming in his chest, âHome is with you.âÂ
You feel like youâre going insane as you pull him in once more, so overwhelmed with the infatuation. Your kisses escalate from shy smacks to a full-blown makeout session, eliciting soft groans from the man looming above you. The way you touch each other feels as though youâre trying to memorize the feel of your bodies, your hands making their way to the skin of his chest under his shirt.
âTake it off if you want to, baby,â he prompts, half-teasing and half-desperate. You catch your breath before tugging on it, motioning for him to help you in pulling it over his head. Every part of him looks like it was sculpted by the gods so intricately. You really canât believe heâs yours for the taking.Â
âYou look like youâre about to devour me,â he teases.
âI am about to devour you.â
He moans at your words, taking you aback.
âYouâre into that?â
âOnly if itâs you.â
You donât know how much time passesâ all you know is that your clothes ended up on the floor and heâs inching his long fingers into your heat. His eyebrows are knit as he presses each knuckle to your walls, while you are left to whimper helplessly. His pace picks up, making your face scrunch up from the pleasure.
âSoo- baby, no,â you have a death grip on his arm, trying to stop him.
âHurts?â
âNo, good,â you swivel your hips, âJust want you inside.â
He gulps, a rush of heat going straight to his groin. âCondom?â
Itâs irresponsible, really. Despite having previous experiences, youâve never done it without. You donât know why, but your brain compels you to heave in response, âNo. I want all of you.â
âYouâre going to be the death of me.â
âDeath by dick seems pleasurable.â
Soobin almost canât believe the humor laced in your words when heâs about to fuck the living daylights out of you, âDonât die on me.â
He pulls himself out of his boxers, stroking himself. Heâs achingly hard, and it took everything in you not to shoot up and beg him to let you have a taste.
âSoobin, youâre huge.â
âMore surface area for me to love you with.â
You were about to shoot him a cringed out look when he guided his tip to your entrance. Both your faces scrunch up in pleasure despite the lack of penetration.
âAre you sure you want to do this?â
âBaby,â your chest heaves, âI need you. I thought I made that clear.â
He beams, a stark contrast to him starting to inch through your insides. Heâs biting his lip as he holds your hips down, âYouâre- fuck.â
Your brain has officially melted into a puddle when he manages to fit everything inside. He gives you time to adjust to the intrusion, pecking your face all over. You swear this is the closest thing to paradise.
And heâs not far off. You notice how his knuckles are turning white from gripping your hips so tautly, trying to ground himself.
When you give him the signal to move, Soobin swears he could almost finish from the first thrust. Heâs almost whining from the all-consuming pleasure, thrusts going from the softest brushes against your walls to calculated presses against the deepest parts of you. Soon enough, youâre babbling against his collarbone, leaving your own marks on his ivory skin. Heâs yours, yours, yours.
âFuck,â Soobin sobs, âI just want to stay like this forever.â
You canât even bring yourself to respond verbally, resorting to clenching around him. His sobs grow even louder, hips unrelenting against yours. You wish you had met back in your hometown. You wish he was easily within your reach. You wish you had the liberty of being tangled up with him for the rest of your life. You donât want to let him go. What can you do when the only person youâve allowed yourself to feel everything and anything for lives oceans away?
âBaby,â your voice is weak as you scratch up his back, tugging on his nape. âAbout to cum.â
This only eggs him on faster, now slamming his hips roughly as he chases your orgasm. âF-fuck. I-inside?â
You hum, locking your legs tighter around his waist, âNowhere else. N-need to have a piece of you with- in me before we fly back tomorrow.â
Your words seem to do wonders for Soobin. Your orgasm hits you at the same time he spills his warmth deep inside. You wouldâve teased him about how he came so much if you werenât twitching from the aftershocks of your release. He stays inside as the two of you unwind, him drawing circles against your hips, trying to soothe it from his death grip from earlier.
âYou alright?â he mumbles against your neck, lapping at it gently. You hum in response, running your fingers through his tousled hair. You lay in silence, relishing in each otherâs body warmth under the covers. He kisses the top of your head from time to time, breathing in your scent.
âI smell like vomit,â you grimace.
âYou smell like sex.â
You roll your eyes, âThat too. But Iâm too lazy to take a shower. Just want to be with you.â
He taps your thigh, smirking, âJust say you want to take a shower with me.â
And that, you did. He takes his time with you, locking you in his embrace as the water simmers through your bare bodies. Mundane as it is, you bask in the feel of his body pressed against yours. Youâd do anything to live in this moment eternally.
When it was time to fly back home, it took everything in you not to lock yourself inside Soobinâs luggage. You had walked hand in hand, waiting for each otherâs flights back home. He kept kissing your knuckles, hushing sweet nothings. When your flight had been announced for boarding, you had cried in his arms, desperately wanting to take him with you. Soobin, ever the mediator, kisses the top of your head, promising to be by your side in a few monthsâ time. You donât dare to look back when you enter the gate. Youâre scared youâll fall into another fit of sobs.
Itâs been 5 months since, and youâre lounging on your couch, waiting for Soobinâs daily good morning message. He had been consistent in giving you even the smallest details of his life, the highlight of each of your days being the video call you hop on for your debriefings until you fall asleep.Â
soob âĄ: good morning
            : the heat is killing me
Your face lights up as his name pops up on your screen.
: good morning <3
: itâs 17° in seoul though?
soob âĄ: wanna see something funny?
: baby itâs too early for your league of legends gameplay
soob âĄ: heyyy :(Â
            : but please say yes
            : this isnât related to league i swear
: ?
: okay yes i wanna know something funny
soob âĄ: okay maybe this is borderline creepy instead of funny
            : [Sent a photo attachment.]
You shriek as you open the photo, feet immediately waddling over to your front door.
There he is.
Soobin has a large grin on his face when his eyes land on you, a bouquet of lilies in his hand extended towards you. Even so, your favorite flowers dull in comparison to your favorite boy. The bouquet is all forgotten on the ground when you run to his embrace, one that youâve been longing for. You donât care if the neighbors could hear your squealing throughout the apartment hallway. Heâs here. Heâs here. Heâs here, and heâs finally all yours.
Summary - You fell for your best friend - Taehyun - and you fell hard. What you didnât know was that you might just have a chance.
â - smut (mdni!!), fluff, mysoginy (dw its not from tae my cutie would never), soft dom taehyun, pwp?, mutual pining, oral sex (f rec.), piv, protected sex, aftercare.
Word count - 6.06k
Authorâs note - Iâm thinking of making small playlists for each fic I write - would anyone listen or would it be a waste of time... ((UPDATE i made one!!!! I organised the songs in rainbow order too đ))
Spotify playlist - đ§
My masterlist!!
You and Taehyun had been friends for years. You met at your collegeâs enrolling day, and had been stuck together like glue ever since.
You both bonded over your big dreams, both of you aiming to be world-renowned lawyers. The two of you managed to make it into the college, and even got placed in the same class. Youâd both helped each other through the course and ended up passing with flying colours, and subsequently became much, much closer. In the 3 years that you had known each other, he had become your best friend in the whole world. It was rare that you had a friend as good as him, as youâd had awful luck in the past.
When you were 19, your childhood best friend had slept with the man you swore was the love of your life. At 20, your high school best friend had moved from your town to some Scandinavian country you couldnât remember the name of, and so on. After a certain point, youâd just stopped trying to form lasting bonds with people. Taehyun, however, didnât seem to be going anywhere. His dream was to work at a law firm that was in the city you both lived in, so you thought that it could be worthwhile to make a friend.
You were very right.
The two of you were working together, now in your late 20s, and everyone in the office knew you as that one inseparable duo. You would always help each other if a case wasnât looking good, youâd get drinks after work, youâd go on trips together. But you were just friends, right?
Youâd never been attracted to Taehyun - college had been so busy that you didn't have a moment to stop and think about romance with anyone, let alone your best friend. The same went for your jobs. The second you got your degrees, youâd both started applying to all the best law firms, and you luckily both got into the company youâd been striving for since the start.
However, now that you were getting into the flow of things, managing your time a little better than before, youâd started to look at him in a different light.
It started when you two had been out for coffee, and the cafe worker had asked what his girlfriend would like. He had never been the type to make service workers feel bad about themselves, so he just brushed it off and asked what you wanted.
While he was waiting for your drinks by the counter, you looked at him. Really looked at him, this time. Youâd always known he was an attractive guy, but youâd never considered how youâd look together.
From your booth, you started picturing yourself with him. Your hand in his, your head on his shoulder, his soft lips pecking your cheek before workâŠ
Less than 5 minutes into realising he was the prettiest man you had ever seen, and you were already planning your future with him. You were snapped out of it by Taehyun setting your drink in front of you. You must have flinched, because he laughed at you - obviously light heartedly.
âDamn, didnât take you for someone thatâs scared of a latte.â
âSorry, I zoned out for a sec. Thanks for the drinkâŠâ
He set down two white packets next to your drink.
âTwo sugars, right?â
You could have sworn that your heart melted. The last time he bought coffee for the two of you was months ago, but he still remembered.
âYeah, thanks.â
You flashed him a smile, desperately trying to look as if you hadnât just realised that youâd fallen head over heels for him.
You spent the rest of your break chatting, enjoying your coffees and laughing over stupid cases you had been given. You were completely gone for the man by the time you were back in his car and heading back to work. His laugh, his voice, the way he would effortlessly blow his hair out of his face⊠You felt as though you were about to start physically drooling at the sight of him.
Over the following few weeks, you had started actively trying to get his attention. Leaving one or two extra shirt buttons undone, laughing a little harder at his jokes, and the most desperate of all, learning magic tricks to try to impress him.
It was a random Friday morning, and you came in proudly holding a deck of cards. Sitting at your desk - luckily, attached to his - you fanned out the cards and held them out to him.
âTae! Pick a card. Any card.â
âGood morning to you too.â
He leaned over, and picked a card. When you withdrew your arm, you âaccidentallyâ knocked over your pot of pens.
âAh, shoot⊠My bad.â
When he leaned down to help you clean up (in his usual gentlemanly fashion), you managed to get a glimpse of his card.
After all of the stationary was returned to the pot, you look to be deep in thought.
âHmm⊠You have the⊠7 of hearts!!â
He looked amusedly shocked.
âWoah, howâd you get it??â
âA true magician never reveals her secrets, Mr Kang. You should know this.â
To anyone else, the way he was staring at you was unbelievably blatant. The man was head over heels, obviously madly in love with you. He had been for a long time, but he didnât want to mess up what the two of you had. When you went to speak to a client, one of his other office friends - Kai - wheeled his chair over and rested his chin on Taehyunâs desk.
âOh god, what do you want, Hyuka.â
âAsk. Her. Out.â
âAre you crazy?? What if she ends up hating me?â
âBro, she wants you so bad. Sheâs literally fighting for your attention. That was a shit magic trick, and she knew it. She just wanted your approval.â
âKai, I really-â
âDo it or Iâll tell her.â
As if on queue, you walked back over to your desk. Kai gave Taehyun one last encouraging look, before rolling back to his own desk.
âWhy was he loitering over here?â
âOh, nothing, he just⊠needed help on a case. Complicated divorceâŠâ
When you sat back down, he couldnât help but notice how your skirt slightly rolled up, how your shirt revealed a little too much when you leaned down to pull in your chair⊠God, his thoughts were out of control. Kai was right, he needed to ask you out before you gave up on him.
âHey, wanna grab drinks together tonight?â
âSure!â
Kai was genuinely ready to explode. The tension had been killing him for months, and he wasnât even directly involved. It felt like such a victory to see his pining best friend finally work up the courage to ask out the girl he was infatuated with.
That night, the two of you ended up in a club - a different one than usual. Taehyun had suggested it, and obviously offered to cover the tab.
You stood by the bar - you both loved listening in on peopleâs drama and talking about it on the way back to your respective homes. While you were ordering the first round of drinks, his eyes were fixed on you. He was mesmerised by the way your hair fell in such a perfect way. Not messy, but it showed you were much more relaxed than you were at work.
When you brought the drinks over, he steeled his face to the best of his ability. He took the soju you had set in front of him, pouring himself a shot.
âWant one?â
âWhy not! Iâve done well this week, I deserve to celebrate.â
âYeah, you do. Iâm really proud of you, that case was insane. I canât believe you managed to get him off.â
His fingers were tugging at a loose thread in his shirt. He was trying to work up the courage to finally do it, to ask you out. He swallowed the lump forming in his throat, took another shot of soju, and was about to just go for it, when a man walked up to you.
âHey, doll. Can I buy you a drink? Pretty thing like you deserves to have her drinks paid for.â
You looked at him kindly, no hostility in your voice whatsoever.
âNo, but thank you for the offer!â
âWhy not?â
âUm⊠Iâm sorry? I just-â
âFucking bitch⊠You try to be nice, and what do you get in return?? Ungateful whores who show off their ass, then donât wanna be hit on.â
You were terrified. Youâd stopped fully listening to what he was saying, more afraid than anything else. He just wouldnât stop talking, going off about how women were so entitled, that they were the reason for the âmale loneliness epidemicâ, and that theyâre all useless slutsâŠ
Until Taehyun stood up. He was a decent height - 5â10â - though he was still shorter than the other man. However, his arms were huge. Despite the other manâs skinnier, clearly weaker build, he kept pressing.
âSheâs clearly not interested. Move on.â
Despite the other manâs skinnier, clearly weaker build, he kept pressing, obviously looking for a fight.
âOh yeah? What are you gonna do about it, hm?â
âIâm not trying to start anything. Just leave her alone.â
âAre you her boyfriend??â
He looked at you, seeing if he had your approval to lie, hoping it would get him off of your back. You shot him a subtle, quick nod, just wanting to get rid of the pain in your ass.
âYeah. I am. Now leave her be.â
âShe could do way better than a guy like you. Bet your little shrimp dick canât even-â
Before he could finish talking, Taehyun passed you your jacket, and shoved the bill for your drinks into his chest, and called out to the bartender.
âHey! This kind gentleman has offered to pay our tab.â
With that, he turned around and led you out of the bar, a certain air of confidence lingering around him.
When you got outside, he let out a breath he had been holding for a while.
âWhat the fuck⊠You okay? He didnât put his hands on you, did he? I didnât notice him touching you, but if he did, I swear to god Iâll-â
You smiled gently. He was so cute, especially when he was checking up on you.
âTae, Iâm fine. Okay?â
âAre you sure??â
You nodded, completely unaware of anything else going on in the world. He was so worried about you, it was adorableâŠ
âUh, is there something on my face?â
Shit.
âUm, no, I just⊠Itâs nothing.â
His heart rate spiked. The moonlight was hitting your face so perfectly; you looked absolutely unreal. He knew Kai would kill him if he didnât say anything nowâŠ
âYouâre really prettyâŠâ
Even under the dim lighting of the moon, he could tell that youâd gone bright red.
âThanks⊠You tooâŠâ
There were a few moments of silence. Not awkward per-say, but absolutely filled with tension.
âI⊠You wanna come to my place? I have popcorn⊠We could have a movie night? As an apology for bringing you to a bar with a creepy, misogynistic incel that should have been included in that manosphere documentaryâŠâ
âIâd love to come over. And shut up, it was not your fault. You had no way of knowing, and you handled it for me. Youâre the best, okay? Donât blame yourself. Got it?â
âYes maâam.â
You ended up calling an uber - which he offered to pay for, of course - back to his place. It was only a 5 minute drive, but he insisted that you didnât walk because you were wearing heels. God, how was he able to make you fall in love with him over and over again?
He even carried your bag for you. He was absolutely perfect. The walk up to his house was one of very comfortable silence, neither of you wanting to break the blissful quiet of the night. When you stepped into his house, you were overwhelmed by the scent of him. Youâd been over once or twice before, and youâd always loved the way it smelled. His house smelled clean, but not in a chemical-ly way, but instead of cedar wood and a slight hint of fruits, and it was intoxicating. It was so distinctly him, and you thought youâd never get enough of it.
âMake yourself at home. You want me to grab anything?â
âUm, could you take my bag? If you donât mind, I mean-â
Before you could finish your spiral, he was already sliding your bag off of your shoulder and taking it to his side room. You couldnât stop the small smile that crept onto your face at the action. You knew it was the smallest act, but it meant so much that he had thought to help with something you could very much do yourself.
He returned as you were taking off your heels, trying to hide his nerves. Kai had convinced him. He was going to confess to you tonight, and he didnât care how it went. It was such a weight on his shoulders, and - if Kai was right, and you did feel the same - it could go very well.
The two of you headed to the living room, and Taehyun offered you a seat on his couch.
âDo you want a drink? I have some wine somewhere⊠Or just water, whatever you want.â
âMmh, wine sounds goodâŠâ
He immediately headed into the kitchen, and you could hear him rummaging around, looking for the wine. Within a few minutes, he returned with two glasses and an unopened bottle.
âYou have a movie in mind?â
âNot particularly⊠Something light, though. Maybe a romcom?â
You ended up settling on Love Reset - a movie youâd watched more times than you could count, and you werenât ashamed to admit it was partially to do with the extremely attractive male lead. Taehyun went to fetch the popcorn, while you poured yourself a glass of the wine and settled into his couch. You wrapped yourself in a blanket, waiting for him to come back and start the film.
When he walked in from the kitchen, he was looking down at the popcorn.
âHey, I donât know which flavour you like, but Iâve got sweet, salted, sweet and sal-â
He froze in his tracks at the sight of you. You looked so cozy, so adorableâŠ
âTae? Whatâs wrong?â
âNothing, itâs justâŠâ
He attempted to disguise his trailed off sentence with a cough, but his reaction was too obvious.
âNo, somethingâs up. Pleaseeee, Terry?â
A deep breath, picking at the skin around his fingers. He was so close to just chickening out, but then he looked up at you, and his breath hitched. This wasnât an opportunity he could skip over. You looked absolutely stunning, you looked like you were truly concerned for him, and prepared to listen to whatever he had to say. He dropped the popcorn onto the table, before sitting a few feet away from you on his sofa.
âFuck⊠I canât keep doing this. Youâre so pretty, youâre sweet, funny, absolutely gorgeous⊠I like you. Like, like you. I have, ever since college, but you seemed so focused and I didnât wanna ruin it for you, but now I feel like Iâve waited too long, but I canât keep this up. Itâs such a weight on my shoulders, and I understand if you hate me now, but Kai would kill me if-â
Your eyes were wide, your heart was racing, your face was flushing.
âHate you??? No way⊠Iâve been waiting to hear you say that for weeks!!â
âI- Huh??â
You ended up telling him about that day in the cafe, how you quickly fell head over heels for him.
âDamn⊠So you like me because of coffee?â
âWell no, but- wait, technically?? Itâs more of a chain of eventsâŠâ
He couldnât help the smile that crept onto his face.
âI actually canât believe you feel the same⊠I thought Kai was being delusional when he was saying you like me
back.â
âI didnât know you liked me either⊠It was hell.â
You shifted closer to him, resting your head on his shoulder as his arm moved to hold you closer.
The two of you sat through the rest of the movie, extremely comfortable in each otherâs presence. His hand was resting on your hip, his thumb occasionally tracing small circles over your clothes, while your head was tucked under his chin. Every so often, he would lean down and press a soft kiss to your hair, and it made your stomach flutter every time.
As the credits of the movie began rolling, he tilted your chin up so you were looking at him.
âEnjoy the film?â
Your pulse spiked. Your heart was racing, your face was flushing, and your eyes widened.
âYeah, I⊠Itâs a great filmâŠâ
âSo, are we⊠Together now? Officially?â
âWell⊠I donât know. Are we?â
His breath was ghosting over your lips.
âDo you want us to be?â
You nodded quickly. Truthfully, youâd never wanted anything more.
âSo, can I kiss you?â
Time froze. The only thing in the world was the two of you, his beautiful, round eyes staring at you as if you were the only girl in the world. You must have hesitated for too long, because you were dragged back to reality by the soft call of your name.
âHey, you okay? You donât have to say yes, Iâm sorry if I rushed youâŠâ
âNo, no, I just⊠didnât expect it. I do want this⊠Please?â
âYouâre sure?â
âYes⊠Iâve never been more sure of anything.â
The mild panic completely dropped from his voice.
âThatâs my girl.â
You could have honestly melted at his words. Yeah, you were his girl. Nobody elseâs.
He leaned in a little closer, giving you enough time to pull away. When you held your ground and let your eyes flutter closed, he smiled slightly, before pressing his lips to yours.
It was slow, gentle, and overwhelmingly blissful. His lips were soft, and they interlocked with yours in such a perfect way, it felt like you were made for each other.
After a few moments, he broke the kiss, his hand sliding up to your face, pushing some hair out of the way.
âYou okay, princess?â
âNever betterâŠâ
âNot too much for you?â
âGod, no⊠Kiss me again?â
He let out a breathy laugh, gently pecking your nose.
âOkay, pretty girlâŠâ
âDonât call me that.â
âWhy? Itâs fitting, is it not?â
You avoided his gaze, your cheeks flushing pink.
âBecause itâs gonna kill meâŠâ
âOh, you like it?â
He did it again. He tilted your chin up, forcing your eyes to meet his gaze. The smile that decorated his face was teasing, but beautiful nonetheless. Instead of kissing you on the mouth, he kissed your cheek, then your forehead, nose, eyebrows, then pulled away, trying to hide his smile.
âThere you go.â
You were pouting slightly, disappointed in his lack of a proper kiss.
âWhatâs the matter, princess? Expecting something else?â
âI⊠Can I have a proper kissâŠ?â
He put on a fake frown, acting as if he was upset.
âAre you saying they werenât proper kisses?â
âNo, I mean- Iâm not complaining, justâŠâ
âIâm kidding, love.â
He smiled softly, before kissing you again. It caught you off guard, so you froze for a moment, before melting into the kiss. A soft laugh left through his nose, and his hand made its way to your waist.
The kiss deepened, and the smile faded from his lips as he tugged you into his lap. A small noise escaped your throat, and it only made him cling onto you tighter.
You heard him mumble something between heated kisses - something to do with you being âso cuteâ. In response, you could only let out a small whine. You were shocked at the feeling of his hips jerking slightly - a very clearly involuntary movement.
You decided to test his restraint and, in an unexpected burst of courage, shifted your hips so you were grinding down on him ever so slightly.
âFuck⊠Stop that, I wanted to move slowly with you, but youâre making that so unbelievably hardâŠâ
You giggled quietly, your immature humour shining through, even in such a heated moment.
âNot the only thing thatâs hardâŠâ
âShut up!! Oh my god, can you take nothing seriously?â
He was laughing too, and thatâs what made you realise that yeah, you want to spend the rest of your life with this man. You were about to express that - you damn near said you loved him - until he picked you up, his surprisingly strong arms wrapping around your thighs.
âTae!! What are you doing?? Put me down!â
He giggled, only tightening his grip on you.
âDamn, you donât wanna go to my room?â
âWait, no, I do- Youâre forgiven. Go on.â
âOh, I needed your forgiveness? Iâm sure I can find a way to make it up to youâŠâ
Your face flushed again, and you kept your arms wrapped tightly around his neck.
âYour ears have gone red. Are you blushing? Cute..â
You quickly reached his bedroom, and he kicked the door closed behind you before gently setting you down on his bed.
âYouâre sure you want this? Obviously we can stop if you change your mind, just⊠our relationship will never be the sameâŠâ
âYeah⊠Yeah, I want this, so badâŠâ
âOkay, babyâŠâ
He pressed one last soft kiss to your forehead, before capturing your lips again. This one was far more passionate than those you shared on the couch, his arms holding himself up above you. The moment was intimate, intense, full of the burning affection you held for each other.
One of his hands slid down to the bottom of your shirt, before slipping beneath the fabric and up to the skin of your waist, trailing up to the wire of your bra. He hesitated slightly, giving you time to reject his advances, before cupping his hand over your chest. The feeling made you groan into his mouth, only making him continue even more intensely.
His lips disconnected from yours, and he started kissing down your neck, his hands withdrawing from beneath the fabric of your shirt to start unbuttoning it instead.
âGod, Tae⊠I thought you were a virgin- you seemed like youâd be inexperiencedâŠâ
He laughed softly.
âShould I be insulted?â
âNo, I just- Youâve never mentioned any other girlsâŠâ
âIt was only occasional hookups⊠Stress relief with girls from dating apps when you were all I could think about. The only one Iâve ever wanted is you.â
Your heart absolutely melted in your chest at his words. The knowledge that heâd been loyal to you before you even knew you liked him made this even sweeter, and you somehow felt even more affection for him.
His hands finished unbuttoning your shirt and he pushed it off of your shoulders, leaving it laying beneath you.
âYouâve been such a tease⊠Unbuttoning your shirt more around me, rolling up your skirt, changing the way you style your hair.â
âYou noticedâŠ?â
âOf course I noticed. I notice every little detail about you. You changed your shampoo a few weeks ago, right?â
âYeah, I didâŠâ
âI happen to pay a lot of attention to the girl I lo- uh, like.â
Your heart jumped into your throat. He was about to call you the âgirl he lovedâ, and for some reason, your self confidence skyrocketed, and you were sure that you were really in love with him, not just a stupid, fleeting fantasy.
âWhat were you going to say??â
His face flushed and he avoided eye contact.
âNothing, donât worry about it. Slip of the tongueâŠâ
âNo, no⊠You were going to say somethingâŠâ
âIt doesnât matter, really-â
âPlease?â
Damm, he really couldnât resist the look on your face. Wide, pleading eyes, practically begging him to tell you⊠And you certainly didnât seem like you were gonna get scared away.
âI, uhh⊠I love you. Iâve loved you⊠Long before today.â
âI love you too, Tae.â
He smiled. The biggest, dorkiest smile ever.
âYou do? Really??â
âYeah, of course I do.â
He couldnât contain himself anymore. He excitedly pulled you into a kiss, arms wrapping around your waist and truly expressing all of the repressed emotions heâd held for you over the past few years.
During the kiss, he ended up rolling the two of you over so your body was on his, laughing when your hair fell into his face. This new position allowed him to fully discard your shirt, leaving you in just your bra, skirt and underwear, with his hands freely resting on your waist.
âGod, I actually canât believe this is happening⊠Youâre so beautiful, princess.â
You smiled, sat in his lap and started to unbutton his shirt.
âIâve dreamed about this⊠So many times, you donât understand⊠Youâre so pretty, baby⊠Most perfect girlâŠâ
You leaned down and pressed a kiss to his cheek, then his nose, then his lips.
âSays you. I actually think youâre the most perfect girl, Tae.â
He let out a quiet laugh at your teasing, before pinching your waist playfully, eliciting a squeal from your throat.
âNot fair!!â
He smiled again, holding you close to his chest, enjoying the vibration of your voice as you spoke up once more, now quieter and more nervous.
âSo, weâre doing this?â
âYeah⊠Weâre doing this.â
He kissed you again, this time allowing it to get more heated. His tongue traced over your lips before you parted them, allowing it to intertwine with yours.
He progressively rolled the two of you over, so smoothly that you barely noticed that he was on top of you.
A gasp slipped from your throat as you felt his thigh pressing against the throbbing sensation between your legs, applying a teasing amount of pleasure. Not enough to give you the relief you were so desperate for, but enough to make sure you really wanted this.
When he noticed your reaction, he smiled slightly, knowing he was doing something right.
âFeel good, love?â
âYes⊠Please, I need moreâŠâ
He folded immediately. He shifted his thigh away, instead kissing down your chest, down your abdomen, and ending at your waistband. He settled himself between your legs, looking up at you as he hooked his fingers under your waistband.
âMay I?â
His words felt like a joke. All of this buildup, and he still had the audacity to ask if you were ready??? It felt like he was trying to mess with you, even though his intentions were definitely a lot more sincere.
âYes, fuck, Iâm begging, please hurry up-â
He breathed out a soft laugh, pressing one final kiss to your thigh before beginning to pull down your skirt.
âGood answer..â
When your skirt hit the floor, his eyes were glued to your figure. Youâd never felt particularly confident in your own body, but under his stare? You felt like nothing short of a goddess being worshipped. His eyes roamed from the ankles that your skirt just fell from, up to your thighs, to your stomach, to your chest, and of course, in your eyes.
âYouâre so beautiful⊠Fuck, youâre actually gorgeous.â
You were going to disagree - not because you didnât believe him, but because you wanted to piss him off - but you were entranced by the way he was looking at you. His hands slowly traced down your sides, not caring one bit that you werenât as skinny as some picture-perfect model. No, in his eyes, you were so much prettier.
He left a second trail of kisses down your body, before hooking your legs over his shoulders. He kept looking up at you, gauging your reaction as he pressed his lips against your clothed core.
A jolt ran up your spine at the feeling, and your fingers instinctively clung to the bedsheets.
âChrist, youâre soaked already⊠Are you a virgin??â
âNo, Iâve had sex!â
He raised his eyebrow at you, and you broke immediately.
ââŠOnce. I was⊠extremely drunk. A week or so after I met you⊠Went to a bar by myself, woke up in a guyâs bed.â
âYeah, well, best believe Iâm gonna treat you a billion times better than that asshole.â
âI knowâŠâ
You smiled down at him, and he smiled back, before sliding his fingers underneath the waistband of your underwear, slipping them down your thighs and dropping them to the floor.
Once they were discarded, he couldnât help himself. He gave a slow, teasing lick up your slit, resulting in your hips involuntarily bucking up into his face.
âHah, didnât know I was that good.â
He looked up into your eyes, maintaining steady eye contact as he finally dropped his head down, beginning to fuck into you with his tongue.
The way his tongue moved against you was nothing less than euphoric. He was dipping his tongue into your folds, then occasionally coming up to circle your clit. Within a minute or so, your hands were frantically grabbing at the sheets, hips moving against his face.
âOh fuck- Tae- âts so good⊠donât stop~â
Not wanting to disappoint you, he didnât stop. In fact, he doubled down, moaning into you as his arms wrapped around your thighs, pulling you even closer. It seemed like he somehow wanted this even more than you did.
Your legs began to quiver, and your hands shot to his hair to attempt to stabilise yourself, pulling a beautiful whine from his mouth.
You tugged on his hair a little harder, which only made him move faster, desperately trying to help you to your release.
âHoly f- Iâm so close-â
As he pushed you over the edge, you covered your mouth with your hand, trying to be as quiet as possible. You felt his hand snake up to your arm, tugging it away and inside intertwining his fingers with yours, giving an affirming squeeze, never stopping the movements of his mouth.
You let out a string of increasingly high pitched moans and whimpers as he continued his actions, now feeling overwhelmed with the pleasure to the point it was almost painful.
âAh-!! Too much, stop-â
The second that last word left your mouth, he withdrew immediately.
âShit, Iâm sorry, I got too- Iâm sorry.â
Your chest was rising and falling, exhausted.
âN-no, itâs fineâŠâ
âAre you sure? If I went too far-â
âTae, it was amazing. Stop worryingâŠâ
He smiled slightly, pressing a kiss to your thigh before crawling up to kiss your cheek.
âWhatever you say, maâam.â
After a few minutes of him letting you come down from your high, you noticed him starting to become more desperate again. His hands were on your waist, holding tightly, starting to kiss your neck. Your back arched under his touch and you wrapped your legs around his waist, letting him know you wanted him just as bad as he wanted you.
The second he took the hint, he reached for his belt.
âCan I? PleaseâŠ?â
âDonât be stupid- Yes, please-â
He didnât hesitate. His belt was undone in seconds, and his trousers were pushed down below his hips, releasing his flushed, leaking cock. He let out a quiet groan as the cold air made contact with his newly exposed skin, before immediately turning his attention back to you.
He leaned over you to reach into his bedside drawer and pull out a condom, which he quickly tore open and slid onto himself.
âYou ready, sweetheart?â
He barely managed to get his words out before you nodded frantically.
âYes, god, Tae- Hurry up-â
His hands found your hips as he aligned himself with your entrance. The two of you moaned in unison as he began to push into you, his grip on you tightening, and your hands flying to grab the slats of the headboard behind you.
âOh fuck⊠Baby, you feel so good⊠You still- ah- sensitive from earlier?â
You couldnât respond, only nod.
âYeah⊠Yeah, Iâll be gentle, okay? Iâll take care of youâŠâ
His caring words somehow turned you on even more. You always assumed youâd be into rougher, more degrading sex, but you were getting butterflies from the way he was treating you, and you somehow knew that youâd never feel this good again unless you were receiving this princess treatment.
Taehyun almost whined as he bottomed out inside of you.
âAh, fuck- Howâs that feel, princess? You okay?â
He leaned down, kissing your cheek softly.
âY-yeah⊠Iâm greatâŠâ
âCan I start moving yet, love?â
âJust⊠One minute?â
âThatâs fine⊠Take as long as you need.â
Taehyunâs cock wasnât particularly huge, but it was definitely a lot to handle. If you had to guess, it was a decent 6-7 inches, and it was thick. Not too much to take, but enough to leave you aching and ridiculously empty the next day.
After a short while, you finally nod.
âOkay⊠I think Iâm readyâŠâ
He kissed you softly once more, before looking into your eyes. God, his eyes were so pretty. Big, round, beautiful boba eyes. Eyes that still looked at you with adoration rather than pure lust. Eyes that proved just how much he loved you.
He withdrew from you slowly, leaving only the tip, before thrusting back into you, over and over again. He quickly set a steady pace, fast enough to bring both of you pleasure, but slow enough to make sure he took his time with you.
He began pressing kisses to the legs you had draped over his shoulders, whining every so often.
âAh~ you feel so good, I canât believe- holy shit, youâre perfect⊠I love you, I love you so much- Ah-â
You were lost for words. The feeling of him fucking you as if his life depended on it had you in complete bliss. All you could do was moan, so much pleasure that your eyes flickered closed.
âHey, hey, look at me⊠Wanna see your- fuck~ pretty eyesâŠâ
The second you looked back at him, you immediately regretted ever closing your eyes. He looked like a literal angel. His hair was sticking to his forehead, a sheen of sweat coating his shoulders and chest - which was rapidly rising and falling. His expression was torn between extremely hot and extremely pathetic, and you fucking loved it.
His slightly parted lips were letting out a string of beautiful sounds, a symphony of moans, whimpers and whines.
âT-thank you~ Fuck, youâre so good⊠My good girl, yeahâŠ?â
You nodded immediately, eager for more praise.
âY-yeah⊠Shit~ Donât stop, Tae~â
He let out a breathy laugh, his hands moving to caress your waist, then up to your chest. He was absolutely worshipping your body. His touches were so soft, as if heâd never seen or felt anything more beautiful than the woman laid before him.
âSo pretty⊠S-ShitâŠâ
He gently shrugged your legs off of his shoulders and leaned down, burying his face in your neck as his hips began to stutter.
âHoly shit- Iâm gonna- Fuck-!!â
A few frantic thrusts later, Taehyun was buried inside of you, spilling into the condom. The sounds coming from him were beautiful. He was whimpering and whining like a wounded animal, and the desperation in his moans sent you over the edge. You clenched around him, hitting your own high, digging your nails into his shoulders to keep at least some of your sanity.
A few minutes later, heâs still buried deep inside of you, panting, regaining some of his strength. He began pressing kisses to your neck, before managing to gather himself enough to pull out of you.
His knees were shaking from the aftershocks of the pleasure, but he still managed to discard the condom, head to the bathroom and return with a warm, damp cloth.
He gently wiped down the sweat from your forehead and chest, before folding it over and wiping down the slick that had coated your thighs. He tossed the cloth to the floor - along with his discarded clothes from earlier - before crawling back into bed with you, tugging the sheets over you both.
You felt his lips pressing against your hair as he pulled you closer.
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