Twitter has been harassing me into regaining my obsession w familoier (aka jaiden and roiers family on the qsmp) ... ive spent the better part of this summer already going crazy over kagehinas romance and satosugus tragedy and i really did not need to think abt q!parrotduo and the Hurt again
The entirety of q!parrotduos dynamic is miserable to me. They end up on opposing sides of a 'war' and yet still uphold a promise of family comes first to eachother. They see eachother lose and gain and lose everything again, they become witnesses of eachother. Conversations run dry because all they're reminded of is What Could've Been.
Familoier is an example of a family, of two people wrecked by regret and daydreams. Even once q!roier found a new family, gaining a new son and a husband all for himself, he still is followed by grief. His eyes search for another, his hand reaches for a hand that will never return. Grief doesn't catch up to him on a sunny day but it follows him constantly, haunting him as the sound of a ticking clock, constantly reminding him of the curse of daring to move on.
And next to him is q!jaiden, who instead is lead by guilt. She finds a sister, a community to live in, shes a beloved aunt of every child on the island and despite being known for mingling with the federation, she has the reputation of a Trusteorthy Companion. Yet, despite all of her achievements, no one could break down the walls. Her story can't be told by anyone she knew because she didn't let anyone know it. The weeks between Bobbys death and her official return are a mistery to everyone, her thoughts only shared with the roses surrounding her house- which is also, as you know, Built Out Of Grief. She ends every day with a memorial to Bobby, she carries memories of him everywhere she goes. Instead of running from it, q!Jaiden closed her eyes and held griefs hand and let it lead the way.
Both of them could have easily moved on, faced grief and said "I'll remember you forever" instead of saying they'll carry Bobby's legacy on, but they didn't. They gave themselves the task of living only for Bobby, of avenging him or of making sure no one else faced the same fate as all of them did. With this promise they also tied themselves to each other forever. They were yin and yang, sunsets and night time, they had sworn themselves to a life only understood by the other half.
And all of this, in my opinion, makes q!Jaidens death more upsetting. Technically, q!Jaiden had something to live for- Rojas Bolas was a promised family to her, she was well liked, she had someone who, if she died, would be left alone in his grief. Yet despite all that, she made the decision of letting go. I think her final action as a living breathing being was opening her eyes and letting go from griefs grip, instead choosing to greet a faith she had only witnessed.
(I also have a slight headcanon that q!Jaiden lived to die and she wasn't scared of death because she knew it'd be her way of meeting Bobby again. I don't think her character was exactly suicidal, but I think death was something she looked forward for.)
Anyway i miss the qsmp and i miss familoier and q!parrotduo and q!jaiden and please qsmp writers drop her character doc i need my theories or headcanons confirmed or denied