A Caregivers Guide to Positional Training
This was written with the intention of providing those CG/l relationships who enjoy ritual in their dynamics a new element without having to feel as if it is traditional slave positional training. No matter what, a CG/l dynamic is still an exchange of power and these commands are meant to accentuate this mindset. Littles not into typical training, much less slave training, may feel out of their element. Yet, they desire the feeling of control from their Bigs, but they do not wish to participate in the original traditions of D/s. Perhaps because it feels too rigid, or too traditional. CG/l is much more lighthearted, tender, and flowing. Therefore, I have gone and adapted a version that will highlight moments in your dynamic that are fitting for littlespace, all while enticing the feeling of submission that a power dynamic can offer. This is by no means a final guide, but rather a list for you to pick and choose from and adapt what works well for you. We suggest you work with one or two positions at a time until your little has practiced and memorized them enough to perform them to your standards. Once those are embedded behaviors, add a new one. And of course, review these WITH your little and decide together which ones appeal to you both and negotiate a list of positions that will work within your relationship. As always, if you have positions you would like to add, please feel free to get in touch with me.
Why is positional training a good idea for my little?
If there is one thing we understand, it’s that littles are often fragile. Littlespace makes them vulnerable and takes a serious amount of trust with a partner to be that exposed. But getting them inlittlespace can be a task, even for a little themselves. They can struggle with adult life and even if they desire to be little, sometimes the transition into that headspace just doesn’t happen, no matter how many diapers, binkies and toys they are surrounded with. The desire and need is there, but the ability to mentally regress simply doesn’t happen. This can frustrate a little even more, to have every tool at their fingertips, but unable to achieve the littlespace. The idea with positional training is to mentally train a cue to the little to trigger littlespace. With enough practice, a command word will become instinctive. Meaning, in a way, you are conditioning your little to be open to littlespace. The mind is suddenly occupied, knowing exactly what to do, like muscle memory. This is a perfect transition for littles who struggle with leaving their adult selves behind; they have a clear direction of what to do and understand what those positions mean,…they don’t feel so lost to “force” littlespace to happen on their own. When there is less pressure to shift into that mental headspace, you will find your little flourish into their role. With enough practice, these commands will become routine.
We suggest to practice these commands when your little is in littlespace to reinforce the state of mind. In time, this will begin to instinctively trigger littlespace like a Pavlovian response, perfect for littles who struggle reaching littlespace. Think of it like a catalyst to deepen your experience with your partner. Because of this exchange of power, this will increase a little’s trust with their Caregiver and provide a more profound and impacting exchange for both the little and Big.
Many littles understand and appreciate the correlation of their role as a submissive in their power exchange with their Big. And those who have that knowledge that submission is a need to give, it can be beyond frustrating to find ways to submit in this dynamic that still fit with the overtones of the CG/l dynamic. How do they go about feeling they are serving without having to set their littlespace aside and separate it from a instinctual D/s dynamic? How can they satisfy the desire to submit without sacrificing their little mindset? These commands can do just that by giving your little the instant gratification of service while still maintaining their littlespace. It is pre-established; the little knowing exactly what to do, what those commands mean, and what is expected of them. This appeals to the submissive urge littles have, all while thoroughly appealing to their little side as well. It’s the best of both worlds for littles who crave the desire to submit.
Escaping negative behavior
But for arguments sake, let’s say you are reading this and realize that the need for serving is not really your little’s desire. Is this no longer an option? In reality, these commands can provide comfort. We all know littlespace is fragile. The tiniest bit of negative thought can be devastating to a little. And the adverse presumptions littles exercise in their mind can play on repeat. Littles often will think worst case scenario. “Do they actually care about me? Are they actually attracted to this? Am I even doing this right? Do I look weird doing this? I don’t even feel like a baby right now, I’m not sure I can do this. They aren’t happy with me. I’m not good enough…” Right? You’ve probably caught your little with this kind of thinking. The constant nag in their mind that they won’t amount to your standards and you’ll just end up leaving them. Our natural adult like state can make it difficult, if sometimes impossible, to shift into the littlespace mindset to the point they can’t feel “natural” or at ease. They second guess themselves and are more concerned with the thoughts of what the Big is thinking of them instead of actually enjoying the littlespace on their own. What a fear for littles to have. These commands are fitting for littles who may need that extra nudge of comfort to ease those thoughts. This allows the little to more easily shed off the natural worries of their adult mind and shut down the negative mantras that replay over and over. Commands will reinforce to the little that the Big does indeed care and is actively participating in their littlespace, fortifying the feeling of being cared for. It innately implies they are good enough as they know exactly what is expected of them. There is no longer any guess work into wondering “what is my caregiver thinking right now?”. Feeling they have a place with you, littles will often find themselves able to then regress with ease knowing their Caregiver is initiating time with them instead of simply watching and “judging” them from afar, which is one of the worst fears of a little. There is less need to perform or act little. The actions become natural, relaxed and fluid; a comfort for those littles who struggle with the worst case scenario mindset.
A note to remember before starting training
All commands should be discussed and negotiated before beginning. We suggest to work with one or two positions and slowly work them into your dynamic/routine. But please remember this still requires the consent of your sub/little to perform these commands. Safe. Sane. Consensual.
Dominants/Caregivers: Start slow. Vary your commands and ensure you watch your little carefully to ensure long exposure to certain positions do not end up restricting any blood flow. Keep in mind hunger, thirst, and the personal needs of your little through training. Let your little rest and take breaks, too much use of commands may overexert your little, so use them sparingly when you feel it’s best needed.
Submissive/Littles: Communicate with your caregiver. You may be prohibited from questioning a command when used, but you should still speak up if you feel discomfort. Not saying so could lead to physical injury or mental discomfort and not mentioning it could keep you from enjoying something helpful in the long run. Speak up and communicate with your partner. You can always ask for things to be revised if you find certain positions difficult. Nothing said is nothing gained.
Always performed facing their Caregiver (no matter if the Caregiver is watching it performed or not), the little will fall gently to their knees and then sit with their legs tucked under. From there, the little will adjust to move their butt to the floor in a side sitting position with their legs still tucked under, but to the side. The little will then lay their hands in their lap, either locked together near their genitals, or simply laid hand on top of the other with palms up in a cupped fashion while keeping their backs as straight as possible and chest up and out. This is a good starting point for many other positions and therefore a simple one to begin with.
This position will instigate a helpless feeling in your little preventing them use of their fingers making normal everyday activities harder to coordinate like that of a bumbling baby; forced to play with the lack of coordinated control. (And rather fun to watch!) When this command is given, your little will tuck their thumbs under their remaining fingers into a fist and bring both fists up in front of their mouth with the side of their thumbs to their lips. This is the “shy baby” pose, also helping to instigate littlespace. From there, the little can continue as normal but must keep the same fist position until directed they can be released by the Caregiver. This is a good command to use once you notice your little beginning to enter littlespace, who is starting to regress but you wish to have them regress further. The loss of the use of their fingers leaves them with little ability to do most normal littlespace activity and will trigger the simplicity of enjoying their toys in more baby-like frame of mind.
*sexually: Caregivers can use this as a form of denial. You can allow your little to play with themselves if they need/want, but instruct them to maintain this position whether using only their hands or toys. Obviously, you may find yourself with little who would rather just hump a stuffie than deal with desperately trying to figure out how to please themselves without griping fingers to use!
This position is similar to “palms in” but directs the little to lay on their back with their belly up and knees up with the same hand position and purpose of “palms in”. The only difference is this also directs the little that they can only play while laying down from that initial position. No getting up unless the Caregiver gives permission, not even on all fours. This also encourages regression of your little, forced to only roll where they need to and continue play without use of their fingers.
A hybrid mix of the first two positions, however it’s extended upright on the littles knees with their knees spread apart, shoulder width, with the same hand position of “palms in”. This position is called by a Caregiver for a variety of useful reasons. From everything to a simple diaper check, to adoration of simply watching their little be little-like. For the little, this position is a prideful one; a chance to showcase their little self to their Caregiver and a good start before playtime with a little. It’s a good trigger that littlespace time is being set aside for them now and they are free to shed off the days worry and regress. Ensure you train your little to keep this position until you are satisfied with your intentions whether for a diaper check or using it to explain to your little a scene upcoming, or simply calling that position when they are getting too overwhelmed and NEED to be calmed. Laying out and dressing a little in a full outfit prior for the little to be in will help the little activate the tools at their disposal to begin to feel in littlespace once this command is called. Think of it as the green light to “start” in order for them to embody their little side.
We all know littles can do the unthinkable (says with sarcasm)…get in trouble! And sometimes a little can, inadvertently take it a little too far. This position is a physical cue to the little that they stepped out of bounds and need to sit and reasses what they did or wait for their Caregiver to explain the need for corrective behavior. In this position, when the command is given, no matter what or where the little is, everything is dropped and the little is to take the “sit sweetly” position, but this time with both hands, palms down, to the floor, one hand to each side and the little will keep their hands glued to that floor until permission is given to release. Once in position, the little is to maintain eye contact with their Caregiver as a formal willingness to receive correction. This gives the little time to rethink their actions, apologize, or for the Caregiver to prevent the little from getting into deeper trouble and quickly correcting troublesome behavior. This reinforces the power exchange of the dynamic, allowing the little to realize that even in littlespace, there are still boundaries/protocols/rules that need to be adhered to.
Similar to rest down, this position also requires the little to drop whatever they are doing, walk to their caregiver and presume the position of “sit sweetly” with their back against the front of the caregivers shins, but this time with their head down and eyes closed. This is a position to reinforce a calm for the little. Sometimes, anxiety can get the better of them, or perhaps they simply need to take a time out when overwhelmed. Feeling something sturdy behind them is a naturally calming technique for those with anxiety (usually sitting back against a wall has the same desired effect). But this is also a good position to call to cue your little that it is quiet time or down time. Or perhaps you simply want to run your fingers in your little’s hair and cherish them These quiet moments of tenderness and care make this positional command the perfect choice.
This is a simple submissive acknowledgement; a nod to the power exchange. This signals to your little to lean their head down, as if they are willingly taking off the symbol of any control (a crown) and choosing to submit that power to you. Caregivers can take this opportunity to apply a collar on their little in this position if they choose.
This is a classic submissive position with the little on their knees, shoulder width apart and their arms stretched all the way out and flat against the ground in front of them with palms down and head down, nose to the floor. While not exactly a little-like position, it still has use for those Caregivers who prefer to do more bdsm/sexual activities with their little. This position is good if the Caregiver wishes to insert a plug, especially before diapering. It can also be used to expose and display a littles “princess/prince parts” for inspection of “Doctor Daddy/Mommy”. This isn’t best suited for impact play since it typically is done on the ground and can be a difficult spanking position for a Dominant. However, you can add a twist by saying “Diaper up, Over the knee” which is much better suited for spanking situations when the Caregiver is sitting on the floor vs a chair/bed/sofa. See “Over the knee” next.
This is exactly what it sounds like. The little immediately is to stand to the side of the seated Caregiver’s legs with their forearms crossed behind their back, facing the side of their legs and slowly bending from the hip over the top of the caregiver’s legs to await further instructions. This is, of course, a classic position for spankings. Arms are already tucked away and ensure when this position is called that your little understands their arms are not to move unless placed elsewhere by the Caregiver.
This is a combination of “sit sweetly” and “palms in”. The little will assume the “sit sweetly” position to the left or right of the Caregiver, always facing them. Their hands assume the “palms in” position, but instead are wrapped around the Caregivers closest leg with given eye contact to the Caregiver. This position is one of warmth and love and adoration. Hence the name “Devote”. This position reinforces the loving nature of the little and Caregiver and allows the time to enjoy the company of their little close to them.
This position is called when the Caregiver is sitting and the Caregiver will spread their legs apart allowing the little to “sit sweetly” between them. This allows the Caregiver to follow up for things like applying collars, brushing their littles hair and adding hair accessories, or it can be the perfect command for story time or to embark cuddle time for movie watching. Also, this is a casual command phrase, so use of it in public situations don’t sound so bdsm-esque.
This is not so much a position as a free opportunity for the little to get their Caregivers attention by flaunting themselves. This can be as simple as striking a pleasing pose for the Caregiver, or doing something the little knows is inviting for their Caregiver. Because this can be a bit of pressure for a little to learn, we suggest you review moments when watching your little in littlespace and if something intrigues you in the moment, tell your little it is a brag worthy moment. This way you will allow your little to have a revolving list of ideas on what appeals to you. In addition, you can use this to involve touch. When the Caregiver touches any part on the little’s body and says this command phrase, that’s the little’s opportunity to flaunt that area. For instance, touching the butt may result in wiggling the butt. Touching their lips may encourage them to play with their pacifier in their mouth. Touching their feet may encourage them to do an impromptu attempt at a ballet dance. Touching their skirt may encourage them to twirl, ect. You get the idea. This is a very open ended command that can be highly customized to you and your little.
We realize not all littles are into ABDL or enjoy diapers, so this section is meant only for those littles who do, or for Caregivers who wish to use diapering as a punishment.
The caregiver will pat the area they want their little to lay at, whether on the floor, a bed, a changing table, or wherever they want to do the diapering. The little responds to the Caregiver and wherever they are patting knowing that is where the little will seat their butt first. Then then will extend their legs out, shoulder width apart, and lay backwards, always leaning back away from the caregiver so their legs and feet are closest to them. This is a good start point for the Caregiver to begin to undo any current diapers being worn, or to initiate the start of a fresh new change.
This is a command for the little to extend their arms up from the position “lay out” and tells the little that the caregiver has something to offer for them to play with during the diapering such as a stuffed animal, a crinkly/rattle toy, a mini book, whatever the Caregiver wishes to give to them to assist in helping them cope with their shyness of being exposed in the diapering process.
Obviously, this command is pretty simple. This instructs the little to bring their knees up, still shoulder width apart, and lift up with their legs to lift their butt up enough to slide a diaper underneath, or to take one off. After it has been taken off or positioned the Caregiver can then use the next command.
You can customize the command depending on your role, but this tells the little it’s time to spread their legs apart by bringing their legs together and then pulling, from their feet, upwards like a butterfly sitting position would do. This exposes the genitalia and makes it easier to apply lotions, powder or for those littles who are sexual, to do things like chastity, oral examinations, “doctor” check-ups, inserting plugs or clit jewelry, ect.
Once the diaper is ready to be tapped down, call the “lay out” position once again so you can fully finish the diapering.
Why is positional training needed?
Really, it’s not. It’s NOT a requirement. And it’s not for everyone. This simply adds depth to a relationship and provides an easier way to initiate and assist your little in discovering littlespace. You are their guide, what better way to guide them than to actively participate in their littlespace? Caregivers often are stuck in a rut of thinking that buying and providing toys and objects for them to use in littlespace is what is defined as “participating”. Littles can sometimes feel disconnected from their Caregivers not sitting down to play with them and not all Caregivers enjoy actually doing littlespace activities. Some littles are even more nervous with their Caregivers watching every move they make. This allows for more intimate interaction while still keeping each role defined and not crossing over each others roles. By no means though are all littles and Caregivers like this. These are only here to accentuate what should already exist…a loving and attentive Caregiver and an eager and playful little ready for their Caregiver’s attention. It’s all about the interaction and building trust with a partner. How many times have littles said they are frustrated because their Caregiver says all the right things but takes no initiative? Well, not every Caregiver is blessed with spur of the moment creativity. This way a Caregiver has a “formula”, ready at any time, but can be mixed, matched, and applied in various ways to develop a new way of caretaking. It takes pressure off of both roles when the creative energy isn’t really there. Consider it the back-up plan, always there to provide attention to your little and for you to build off of.
-Written by me, follow and see my blog at: https://babysplayground.wordpress.com/blog/
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