Ziyi, showing Jeffrey a picture of his crush (Xukun): thoughts?
Jeffrey: and prayers.

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@cursedfan
Ziyi, showing Jeffrey a picture of his crush (Xukun): thoughts?
Jeffrey: and prayers.
Linong: What time is it?
Xiao Gui: I don’t know, pass me that saxophone and we’ll find out
Xiao Gui: *Plays the saxophone loudly and extremely out of tune*
Zhengting: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE MORNING
Xiao Gui: It’s 2 am
Xukun: What is your biggest weakness?
Yanjun: I can be uncooperative.
Xukun: Okay, can you give me an example?
Yanjun: No.
Chengcheng: I am 100% straight
Zhangjing: Zhengting’s hip tattoo
Chengcheng: I am 80% straight
Zhangjing: Xiao Gui with his hair tied back
Chengcheng: I am 60% straight
Zhangjing: Xukun in a baggy sweater
Chengcheng: I am 40% straight
Zhangjing: Ziyi with his shirt off
Chengcheng: I am not straight
Xukun: I want to wake up with you every day for the rest of our lives.
Ziyi: I wake up at 4:30 AM every day for my morning run.
Xukun: I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives.
Justin: So we have good and bad news
Zhengting: Okay, bad news first
Justin: The fire we started in the living room is out of control
Zhengting: THE WHAT??
Justing, holding a perfectly toasted marshmallow: Wow, you don't even care about the good news
Xukun: come on, how many times do I have to apologize??
Ziyi: once.
Xukun: ...No.
*Xukun joining ‘Perfect Restaurant’ cast*
customer: can I see the menu please
Xukun: the men I please is NONE of your BUSINESS
Xukun: I hate touching people, I have bad allergies, skinship is no for me.
Yanjun: You are literally in Ziyi's lap though?
Xukun:
Xukun: "tHis IS diFfEReNt!"
I MISS MY BABIES
*Xiao Gui sends more than 5 messages in a row*
Justin: not gonna read all that.
Justin: I’m happy for you tho.
Justin: or sorry that happened.
Zhengting: Xukun was so annoying with his first place agenda, so we made a "Fuck Cai Xukun" club
Zhangjing: But then SOMEONE took it too literally
Ziyi: INSTRUCTIONS WERE UNCLEAR
Xukun: Look, it's simple. All you have to say is “Hi, I took a blood test and I want my results back”. Got it?
Linong: *nods while the phone rings*
Nurse: Hello, how can I help you?
Linong, panicked: I want my blood back
Linong: *hangs up*
Xukun:
Linong:
Yanjun *to Zhangjing*: I'd walk through fire for you. Well not the fire, because it's dangerous. But in a super humid room. But not too humid because my hair.
Zhangjing: ...
"Zhangjing is really short." Chengcheng says into the mic.
The crowd cheers. Chengcheng begins to walk off in a glory when a voice speaks and commands silence.
"bitch say that again," he says. Chengcheng looks for the owner of the voice. There in the third row stands... who? Chengcheng can't see him.
Yanjun: *lays across the table seductively*
Yanjun: Hey- *table breaks*
Zhangjing: I've finally gotten over my fear of ghosts! I'm brave now!
Xukun: That's the spirit!
Zhangjing, snatches wig: Oh FUCK, WHERE?!