There SHE IS!!! My princess rose DRAGON!!!!
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@cursedrose
There SHE IS!!! My princess rose DRAGON!!!!
“ i can’t stay another night in the city.” ( from sherry! also hello again! ;w;/ )
playlist starters !!
the admittance comes as a surprise. the redhead pauses, blinking slowly as her attention focuses fully on Sherry. she had always been a woman of action, of bold proclamations and the drive to see them through. so when the statement leaves her lips, Aki believes it. believes she can and will leave should she so desire. but...
she’s still here. speaking to her, of all people.
her eyebrows furrow, corners of her lips deepening in thought. Aki has no reason, let alone permission to ask the how’s and why’s as to what has driven Sherry to this point. she has an idea -- perhaps a few -- but unless the other duelist is willing to give a reason, Aki feels she has no approval to ask.
thus her silence. caught between considering such things and smothering a desire to know, a moment of indecision she has come to find herself in many times over the past several months. to fall back into habit or try and reach out. it has become easier with practice, but still, she clings to past comforts and a hesitance to grow. her fingers itch at her sides, a sign she has come to recognize as a need to touch her deck. tap the back of her cards and focus on their weight in her hand. a tactic to ground herself, shy away from problems that arise when they’re too much to handle.
but she resists. instead lifting her arms to cross over her chest, plucking a little at her gloves before finding the courage to reply.
“then I can see you off,” a small promise, built on a growing sense of confidence further bloomed by the inspiration Sherry has ignited within Aki. she is allowed to grow, to take her own steps. little by little she can branch out beyond her safety net and find new places to go, new people to meet. so she extends a further olive branch, not fully trusting the budding sense of hope but not willing to nip it yet either. “... and, if you desire, I will gladly welcome you back as well."
*: ・゚✧ discover weekly playlist, part one.
lyrics from various artists on my discover weekly playlist on spotify. feel free to change pronouns, wording, etc. as needed!
“ for people like us, in places like this, we need all the hope we can get.”
“ and now i ain’t got no worries.”
“ ain’t got no one to call my own.”
“ all i got had come undone.”
“ look in the mirror at what i found. it’s just the past and it’s over now.”
“ i been in a cave forty days.”
“ this is our crime.”
“ i still believe, through the pain and through the grief, i still believe.”
“ i’ll climb this hill, upon my knees if i have to.”
“ i feel like i wanna go home.”
“ what is it good for? absolutely nothing.”
“ i said who wants to die?”
“ anything as long as it’s mine.”
“ is it the way back in, or is it the way back out?”
“ lies and secrets become your world.”
“ i have seen the demon’s face.”
“ i get satisfaction everywhere i go.”
“ where i lay my head, that’s where i call home.”
“ life of a drifter is the only life for me.”
“ why don’t you sit right back, and i may tell you a tale.”
“ somewhere out there on that horizon, i know there must be something better.”
“ it’s survival in the city, when you live from day to day.”
“ when you’re down, that’s where you’ll stay.”
“ i was born here in the city.”
“ nothing grows, and life ain’t very pretty.”
“ no one’s there to catch you when you fall.”
“ i can’t stay another night in the city.”
“ i’ve been driving all night.”
“ there’s a voice in my head.”
“ we don’t need to talk at all.”
“ and i’m sure i’ve had enough.”
“ our quest carries on.”
“ day after day this misery must go on.”
“ now here we stand with their blood on our hands.”
“ we fought so hard, now we can understand.”
“ i’ll break the seal of this curse if i possibly can.”
“ and what do i get for my pain?”
“ despite my rage i am still just a rat in a cage.”
“ someone will say what i lost can never be saved.”
“ and what do you want?”
“ and what have you got?”
“ and i still believe that i cannot be saved.”
“ i know, you know this ain’t gonna last forever.”
“ let’s take advantage while we still can.”
“ we ain’t gonna show no mercy to anyone that tries to get in our way.”
“ when you need a friend through thick and thin, don’t look to those above you.”
“ if it can be done, you can do it.”
“ you’ve got to pick up the pieces.”
“ you better pull yourself back together.”
“ maybe you’ve got too much cash.”
“ when are you gonna turn yourself in?”
“ i need something to slow me down.”
“ you watch the world complain but you do it anyway.”
“ you know we’re gonna make it.”
“ you gotta chill, relax.”
“ so many times, it happens too fast.”
“ you must fight just to keep them alive.”
“ though measures call for me to be ruthless.”
“ and i return to learn that all is lost.”
“ cover me when i run.”
“ no turning back now, the journey lies ahead.”
“ i won’t give up until __ is dead.”
hc » parents
Aki never fully finds peace with her parents. while she finds it within herself to forgive, she cannot forget their past mistreatment of her and is unable to find a ‘place’ with them again. she remains emotionally distant to Hideyo and Sestuko despite their making up, and any attempts from either side to try and bridge the gap end up falling too little too late. she still calls them ‘mama’ and ‘papa’ respectively but has a hard time clicking back into their lives, especially when out of the house. its easier to fit into a role she finds familiar elements with rather than try to fix what was broken, yet she cannot ever truly feel comfortable with them again.
My Black Rose Dragon for @magicandwizardszine! I’m very proud to have been a part of it with geat artists!!
Old Sketch I wanted to colour for a long time!
Maybe Aki is a good singer?
‘is it my fault?’ (dxjlnmhjsj I'm really trying to come back here ;;)
soft angst starters
There’s a part of her that wants to scream at him. She’d thought he’d known better. Thought he understood. She was getting better, yes, but this… It was too much. Too soon.
Her grip on the broken handle tightens even as her hand moves to place it on the table, soaked palm resting alongside the other shards of porcelain strewn across the wooden surface. She ignores the hot liquid covering her right hand, hardly even noticing that the tea has started to mingle with dark red that now streams from her fingers. The redhead is too preoccupied with her thoughts to even care honesty, narrowed eyes fixated on the space between them.
He doesn’t have the right to ask that question. Doesn’t get to care for her now after talking about him like that. Jack didn’t know anything. None of them did. And even if a small part of her whispered that she, in fact, very likely never actually knew him either, Aki can’t bring herself to stop seething. And she hates herself for that.
How is it she still gets so angry on his behalf? Still couldn’t bring herself to hate him, despite everything that he did? Why did she still act this way, even after everything that she’d come to understand he’d done to others, to her, that she felt the need to protect him?
It makes her feel sick. Disgusted. But still, it was there. No matter how much she tried to exhaust it with stone cold facts, that corrupted sense of loyalty still lingered.
And she hated that Jack was making her face it.
I can't do it. Not now. A childish voice pleaded within her mind, the shreds of her past still clinging to her subconscious like a child to it’s mother. The better part of her, the side where she knows and acknowledges these things as something she needs to move past, wants to take over. Encourages her to breath, to apologize and, hopefully, put this behind them.
But she can’t. Doesn’t have that strength within her quite yet, and instead she finally looks to the blond, brown eyes ablaze with misguided anger.
“Get out.”
It’s a whispered demand, one that borders on the edge of her breaking. She’s ready to burst into a shaking scream, of self loathing and anger at him, and HIM and, most of all, herself. Because she can’t take the truth. Can’t face it when her heart has already been smashed to pieces, and not with someone she’d only just learned to trust.
‘what keeps you up at night?’
soft angst starters
A straight forward question should reward a straight forward answer. But like with so many things as of late, Aki hesitates. The idea of being so open, so vulnerable, with the very fears that eat away at her subconscious is… intimidating, to say the least. How does she explain what causes her to jolt awake, panting, shaking, and grasping at shadows at night? These things that lurk at the edge of her mind when awake, waiting for the chance to strike when her eyelids finally closed to sleep.
Fingers itch at her sides, nails digging into the flesh of her palm as eyes dart from the tattooed face to empty corners. She can’t bring herself to admit anything while looking at another person, another pair of eyes, waiting for whatever she might say and place judgement upon her childish fears and past actions. Even if it’s him. No amount of patience and understanding could let her be so open so fast.
There are memories, both old and new – some far too fresh in her mind, that still linger. Still haunt her every step. Eat at her confidence. Her faith. Remind her of her complacency. Of her lack of control. Of her rage.
Aki swears she can still see fire flickering at the edges of her vision when she wakes. Taste the tang of iron and smoke, smell the faintest wafts of cologne sticking to her clothes. It’s all there, burned into her very being. And no amount of repentance will ever take it away.
A small part of her wants to simply say ‘everything’. Everything that she’s ever done keeps her up. But it wasn’t that simple, and she wasn’t that brave. So she settles for something less obtuse, but still not quite as definitive. It’s a weak answer, maybe even immature, but it’s all Aki can give. For now.
“The past,” the young woman murmurs, gaze falling down to her hands, now woven together over her stomach, an uneasy breath escaping past her lips. “Everything that could’ve been different… had I tried.”
SOFT ANGST STARTERS.
‘stay for me.’
‘what’s this between us?’
‘i don’t want your apology.’
‘you know i have feelings for you.’
‘yeah, i remember the drill.’
‘you’ve never hurt me. ever.’
‘then leave her/him/them. at home.’
‘i don’t believe it.’
‘this is breaking my heart.’
‘you met me at a very strange time in my life.’
‘what keeps you up at night?’
‘i wish you were here.’
‘i let you down.’
‘something strange happened here.’
‘you’re not safe here.’
‘i wasn’t ready to say goodbye.’
‘we are not the same, and never will be.’
‘don’t touch me.’
‘is it my fault?’
‘i’m not like them.’
‘i forgot my name again.’
‘i don’t know who i am.’
‘your fear of looking stupid is holding you back.’
‘are you still alive?’
‘i don’t like being told what to do.’
‘am i making you uncomfortable?’
‘nobody cares if you don’t go to the party.’
‘it was supposed to be fun, and you ruined it.’
‘where the hell are my friends?’
‘stop pretending life doesn’t terrify you.’
i’m so fuckn glad people associate the sound duel track ‘dragon’ to aki, haHAHAHa
Promise (Reprise) - Akira Yamaoka (Silent Hill 2)
baby ur my
ANGELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
so i need to get off my ass and start taking screenshots for new icons but i updated some things and i feel (semi) accomplished.
This OST is absolutely perfect.