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leofwines-deactivated20250831

forever alone sun, troll face moon, me gusta rising

PLEASE explain the Latin fuck words. for science

Okay so. The Romans think that sex doesn't count as real sex unless Someone Is Getting Penetrated By A Dick Or Dick-Adjacent Object. Very sort of dick-centric system.

So Latin has six words for "to fuck", divided into three pairs: one pair for each of the possible Holes (ass, mouth, pussy). In each pair there is a word for topping and a word for bottoming.

Most people who know a little about Latin fuck verbs know 'pedicare' and 'irrumare' from the first line of Catullus 16 (Pēdīcābō ego vōs et irrumābō), which is a poem about saying "absolutely shut the fuck up and piss all the way off" to fandom antis and purity police who are making repulsive accusations about you personally, based on things they're reading into your work from a bad-faith perspective. Catullus was so real for that and it's incredibly endearing to me that he was dealing with the same thing we are still dealing with. I got a hater in my askbox doing this about The Wisdom of Emperors just the other day, but I took the high road and, unlike Catullus, did not tell them "I will assfuck you and I will facefuck you" So here sort of a chart about the verbs: Topping | Bottoming Mouth: irrumare | fellare Ass: pedicare | cevere Cunt: futuere | crisare

Another fun fact related to the fuck verbs was that the Romans didn't think about sexual orientation in terms of who you're attracted to, they thought about it in terms of "which is your favorite hole and what do you like to do with it." So you'll get graffiti (ancient roman subtweeting) about things like "Marcus is a fututor [cunt-fucker] and a pedico [ass-fucker] but omg girlies I also heard he's a fellator [cock-sucker] 👀👀👀👀" In the modern day we'd just call him bisexual, but in Ancient Rome it is not enough to know if someone is bisexual (they think it's kind of perverted if a man only fucks women, like do you have some kind of freaky pussy fetish???? you've never once even fucked a twink??? dat's gay, bro. gay to not be bi), you also have to know if he's being bisexual in a respectable sort of way

You will notice that pussy-eating is not on this list, because those words do not mean "to fuck", they translate more directly to just "pussy-licking" (cunnilingus), and because the Romans are sexist as all hell and think that's gross and filthy anyway. This is not ONLY because of pussy terror, it's also that the mouth is the most sacred part of the body -- so eating pussy or sucking a dick is actually considered slightly more "shameful" than getting fucked in the ass. (Please note as well that the fuck verbs are gender neutral -- if you're a roman man and your girlfriend owns a strap-on, she can [pedicare] you. but be careful because your sworn enemy in the forum will have a fucking FIELD DAY if he hears about that and will write a Mean Poem about you or subtweet you on a public wall)

The moral of this story is that the Ancient Romans were absolutely *GAGGING* for social media (see Martial's Epigrams, aka My Best Tweets), and the second moral of this story is that if this was a fun post for you, you should look at my kickstarter for alllllll of this kind of nonsense in the form of A Fantasy Novel That's Pretending To Be An Academic Paper With A Fake Bibliography And Foonotes aka The Wisdom of Emperors. And please signal boost this so everyone can know about Latin Fuck Verbs and Roman Subtweeting, we've really learned so much here together

i2-xmf

“I Cannot Remember” (2009)

#childhood vibes

barometric

3/5/26 tornado south of Wakita, OK

#ae

soundcarvings

you know what is missing from modern writing? The spirit of adventure. It’s mostly all neurotic psychoanalysis. Trying too hard to be vague. Not admitting that you just want to write about yourself, which is very dangerous. No care for lyricism in the work. No sense of adventure because all of these MFA holders are over educated and under experienced.

soundcarvings

I told my beautiful friend today that “When you feel misunderstood then you must commit yourself to understanding others” this is the remedy. This is the medicine.

#quote

bippus

spiritusloci

Greenman, Doorway at Brasenose College, Oxford

#wizard101

that-house

the fastest car in happy town goes over 200 smiles per hour

#it's all fucked #SoundCloud

i-am-a-fish

don't be mean to yourself that's you

you live there

The “Bikini Girls” Mosaic,

Villa Romana del Casale, Piazza Armerina, Sicily

4th century with later additions (perhaps after the AD 365 earthquake)

The Villa is arguably one of the best-preserved and best-known Roman villas and contains one of the most important collections of late Roman mosaic pavements in the Mediterranean.

Villa del Casale also boasts an amazing collection of mural paintings that covered the walls of the residence.

(Image: In the upper left corner, the geometric mosaic of the preceding phase is visible).

#mylapham