Your characters are allowed to be bad people. Your story is allowed to have no moral lesson.yyour ending is allowed to be sad. The villain can win. The good person can do something unforgivable. The lovers can destroy each other. You are allowed to write the thing that no one asked for and everything that everyone told you doesnโt work and you are allowed to not explain yourself.
๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ โ โ presenting a situation as having only two alternatives when, in fact, there are more. โ
in the gilded halls of a prestigious frat house, loyalty is a fragile lie and love is nothing more than a risky gamble. what began as a simple bet among brothers has spiraled into a suffocating obsession that threatens to dismantle everything they built.
the false belief that hearts can be won through deception and that brotherhood can survive betrayal. as a single event triggers a chain reaction of manipulation and lust, the men who once called themselves best friends begin to stab each other in the back, proving that once the lie takes root, the truth becomes the most dangerous weapon of all.
๐๐๐๐ ๐. ๐๐๐๐๐๐
word count :: 19,3k
main love interest :: choi san
synopsis :: if thereโs no label, itโs only fair for everyone to take a bite. youโre considered a prize in the predatory world of the frat house. when you show up to their party unannounced, you unknowingly become the center of a high-stakes bet. caught in a dizzying hunt between the charming frats, youโre forced to navigate a maze of lust and deception, all while wondering if the man you actually want will finally claim you before someone else wins the game.
synopsis :: finding yourself standing at a crossroads where the light no longer reaches. the devil offers an apple to his favorite angel, but as you take a bite, you realize the sweetness was only a mask for the rot of a soul-crushing deal. to save the heaven you built, you must now learn to thrive in the shadows casted over your heart.
synopsis :: the lie has become your truth, woven itself into the dream life you wanted. a new shadow now enters the circus to pull the strings of your silent surrender. even as the cage door locks tighter than ever before, a promise arrives to keep you forever in the very paradise you are trying so desperately to stay in.
you know that reblogging + commenting + interacting with authors and their work won't hurt you, right? just saying, but you do what you do, don't expect motivation and new stuff to come out, if you don't engage in the process of supporting those who take their time and energy to give you content.
pairing๏นขjung wooyoung x fem!reader x jeong yunho
genre๏นขsmut. porn with little plot, contains heavy dialogue, toy use, edging, overstimulation, orgasm control, mild sadism, usage of petnames (angel, baby, princess).
synopsis๏นขnothing is ever just a game with wooyoung, and with yunho involved... they push all of your buttons.
word count๏นข3,7k
โwhat do you mean you donโt know where it is?โ
WOOYOUNG doesnโt even look at you at first. heโs standing in front of the mirror, adjusting the collar of his shirt before ruffling his hair, letting a few strands of dark bangs fall into his eyes. he was so calm, didn't even care much about the remote to the toy in your panties was gone. you, on the other hand, are seconds away from losing it, pacing on the edge of your patience, your mind spiraling faster with every second he doesnโt react.ย
โi donโt know,โ he says simply, reaching for his perfume, spritzing it once, then twice, the citrus scent quickly filling the room. he looks confident and so sure of himself, and somehow that makes it worse. because no matter how put together he is right now, he still canโt answer one simple question โ where is it? maybe some poltergeist had hidden it somewhere. it will appear someday by chance, so donโt worry that pretty little head of yours.
โyouโre unbelievable and so irresponsible,โ you scoff at him, rolling your eyes and crossing your arms. he's never lost it before, not once. it's always in a pocket of his jacket or jeans, somewhere easy to reach. not something that justโฆ disappears. what, did it fall into some kind of void? vanish into thin air?ย
โyouโre the one who agreed to wear it.โ finally glancing at you through the mirror, one brow slightly raised, as his gaze drags over you from head to toe. fitted black long-sleeve crop top, short flowy skirt, chunky boots, jewelry catching the light, every detail carefully put together, and all he thinks about is the accessory hidden underneath.
โthat was under the assumption you wouldnโt lose the damn remote.โ to him, you still looked pretty even when you were angry or irritated.
โi didnโt lose it,โ he corrects, turning to face you, leaning back against the dresser like he has nothing to worry about. โi just donโt know where it is.โ
you exhale, trying to ignore the way your pulse is already picking up just from the situation itself. this just couldn't be happening. if it were a condom, no problem, as if you didnโt prefer to do it raw. or whatever small thing like forgetting to buy eggs or chocolate. that's more forgivable than something like a remote control for the very expensive toy he bought to torture you with.
โwoo, thatโs basically the same thing.โ
โnot really.โ
โthereโs no point in me even wearing this if you canโt control it.โ
โmaybe itโs in my car.โ
โmaybe?โ
โguess weโll find out.โ and just like that, he puts on his shoes and grabs the car keys, heading for the door, leaving you standing there, stomach twisting with the uneasy feeling that heโs not nearly as clueless as heโs pretending to be.
you and wooyoung arenโt dating. you donโt see anyone else, he doesnโt, either. itโsโฆ whatever this is. something in between, exclusive, but unlabeled. days that blur into nights harder to walk away from. kisses that linger, hands that donโt know when to stop because with him, everything always leads somewhere, tension that never really fades.
he calls you angel when youโre trying to be a sweet devil. baby when youโre glaring at him, princess when youโre about to snap, and brat when you behave like one. you call him annoying, dickhead, little shit, sometimes baby slips out, when youโre not thinking too hard about it.ย
itโs inevitable. he likes control, thrives on it. pushes until you push back, just to see how far youโll go before you give in. and you pretend you donโt enjoy it, but you love and appreciate him more than anything; he is your soulmate, perhaps, or at least that's what you like to tell yourself. people donโt ask questions anymore. to them, youโre just wooyoungโs girl, and whether thatโs made official or not, you donโt correct them.
the thing is, itโs not just teasing and tension. he knows how to take care of you, too. soften after heโs been rough and give just as much as he takes. he keeps you on your tippy toes, yes, but he also knows exactly how to spoil you and make it feel like youโre the only one heโs paying attention to.
maybe thatโs why you stay. and maybe thatโs why, even after checking the car and coming up empty, youโre still standing there with him, wearing the damn thing like it wasnโt a mistake to begin with.
โbaby, relax,โ he says, closing the car door with a soft thud as he locks it, shrugs like itโs nothing. โitโs not the end of the world.โ
you stare at him as you wait for him to get on your side so you can walk together to the building. he smirks, stepping closer, just enough to mess with your already delicate balance. you open your mouth to argue, but he cuts you off.
โif youโre that desperate,โ murmuring as he doesnโt look bothered. if anything, he looks more amused. โi can always take care of it myself.โ
โhow, exactly?โ you ask, and his gaze stops at your face, taking in your beautiful features once again.
โmy fingers,โ he adds, like heโs listing options. โmy mouth. whatever my princess needs.โ
you swallow, trying to hold your ground, even as heat creeps up your neck, then he leans in just enough, voice brushing past your ear, โbut donโt even think about asking for more. not with that attitude you had earlier.โ
your breath catches for half a second before you recover, shoving lightly at his chest. you hate how his words settle somewhere under your skin, because as much as you want to think otherwise, you know he means it.
the place is quieter than you expected. you and wooyoung are the first to arrive early, for once. when you checked the time, you realized youโd be here almost twenty minutes ahead of everyone else. youโre usually right on time, or at least not the first through the door.
โhey, donโt think too much about it,โ he murmurs as you stand in front of the door after ringing the bell, his hand settling at your lower back, warm against your bare skin. โjust relax and try to have fun.โ
right on cue, the door swings open, and there he is โ the man of the hour.
โwooyoung, (name), didnโt expect you to come that early,โ YUNHO says, greeting you both with that charming and welcoming smile.
โcongratulations on the ten million, yu!โ you say, handing him the small gift bag. โthis is from me and woo, something small, but from the heart.โ
โyou shouldnโt have, your support was already enough,โ he cuts in, taking it with a grin. โbut thank you. now come in.โย
he lets you both inside, already talking about the milestone and how unexpected it was. he figured it was worth celebrating with the people closest to him. ten million subscribers on youtube, a diamond button, and a whole career built off a screen, and somehow still the same yunho youโve always known.
you settle onto the couch, nodding along as you listen. beside you, wooyoung drops down without a second thought, legs spreading to take up more space than necessary, his arm draping over your shoulders, a little territorial. yunho moves around in front of you, back turned as he fixes up drinks, adjusting things here and there. then he reaches for the remote on the table.ย
โlet me just put something on while we wait for the others.โ
you barely notice it at first, until you do. a faint vibration, subtle enough to miss if you werenโt already on edge. but then you feel it a little stronger now, your entire body goes still. next to you, wooyoung doesnโt move, but you catch the slight tension in him before he relaxes again. he knows something you donโt.ย
yunho keeps clicking absentmindedly, frowning at the tv. โwhy isnโt this turning on?โ
your fingers curl into the hem of your skirt, trying your very best to stay calm and not to move so much, because the tv isnโt the thing he turned on.
the realization hits wooyoung first. his gaze flicks to the remote in his friend's hand, then back to you. so thatโs where it went, huh? a few days ago, you were at yunhoโs again, along with san and mingi. hanging out and trying a new game while the youtuber showed off his new tv, whose remote looked almost identical to the other one for the vibrator.
because if that remote is in yunhoโs hand, then that means โ yes, the tv remote is at wooyoungโs place, tucked away somewhere after he probably took it by mistake. and he had been wondering why the toy wasnโt working, thought the batteries had died or that it needed charging. clearly, he hadnโt bothered to check. he told you he lost it to avoid nagging from you about breaking expensive things again.
wooyoung leans back into the couch, the initial surprise fading as amusement settles in. his hand squeezes your shoulder gently, almost reassuring, if it werenโt for the situation. youโre trembling slightly at first, your lips press together tightly, but a soft moan slips out. your hand flies to your mouth too late, and thatโs what makes yunho turn, glancing at you with concern.ย
โare you okay?โ youโre not.
โy-yeah, iโm o-okay,โ you manage to answer somehow, voice unsteady, but heโs already clicking the remote again, and it speeds up. your voice betrays you again, as wooyoung tilts his head, leaning in so only you can hear him. โsure about that, angel?โ
you shoot him a look from the corner of your eye, but he only gives you that same cocky grin.ย
yunho presses another button. the sensation spikes stronger this time, your eyes squeezing shut as you try to hold it in. it hits deeper now, the vibrations hit your core, your thighs press together, and you can feel how wet you are getting already.
โyunho,โ your so-called โboyfriendโ says in that playful tone of his you grew up to despise, โmaybe try the other button.โ
your eyes snap open instantly. yunho hums, doing exactly that. you clamp your hand over your mouth when a little louder moan than before slips into the quiet room. he looks over again, brows pulling together, lips parting slightly.
โare you sure youโre okay?โ he asks again, slower this time, but you nod too quickly.
โy-yeah, iโโ another press and your answer turns into a breathy gasp, โahhโโ
yunhoโs gaze flickers between the two of you. he turns it off, watching as your body relaxes, your shoulders dropping, then turns it on again, and you immediately jolt, squirming against the couch. oh, is that... he is curious now as he keeps pushing button after a button, and every instinct in your body is telling you to move, to stop this, maybe get up and grab that forsaken remote from his hand, only for wooyoung to hold you in place.
โshh, keep it down,โ he murmurs near your ear. โwouldnโt want to make it obvious.โ
โyouโโ you whisper, barely getting the word out, he watches the flutter of your eyelids, the minor tremors in your thighs.ย
โshould i stop?โ yunho asks, and wooyoung answers before you can.
โhmmโฆ i donโt think she wants you to.โ
โi wanโโ your hand flies back to your mouth once the vibrations hit you right at that spot.
โsee? sheโs not saying no.โ wooyoung hums and your glare. why does he have to be so mean? give men a little power and watch them ruin beautiful things.
โtell me what you want,โ the taller says, thumb hovering over the remote, attentive, but not stepping back. while the shorter is watching you struggle, enjoying every second. to be honest, he's always been a sadist, but when someone else is around, he just becomes absolutely insufferable. he never allowed anything like that, for someone else to interfere, not even permission is given to san.
โprincess, if you donโt answer, he might just keep guessing.โ and even through the tension and the overwhelming pressure building in your body, you still manage to be difficult.
โor,โ you breathe out shakily, glaring up at your boyfriend, โyou could both stop being annoying and figure it out yourselves.โ
wooyoung blinks, then lets out a quiet laugh under his breath. โthere she is, the brat in you has been hiding for so long now. i was wondering when it will come back.โ
the first few minutes were a low setting here, a pulse there. youโd squirmed, biting your lip, trying to endure it and to show them that you, in fact, can handle it. then the vibration settled at a steady, mid-level grind. itโs enough to keep you perched on thin ice, pleasure coiling tight and hot in your belly but never releasing. youโre panting softly against your own palm, sweat dampening the back of your neck where wooyoungโs breath fans.
โlook at her. sheโs trying so hard to be quiet. she the prettiest angel, right yunho?โ
yunho doesnโt answer immediately. he just turns the vibration off completely. the sudden absence creates crushing emptiness that feels worse than the stimulation. a whimper of pure loss breaks from your throat as your hips seek the pleasure thatโs gone.
โoh, she doesnโt like that,โ wooyoung coos, laughing softly. his hand slides down from your waist to splay possessively over your lower stomach, pressing down. โshe wants it back, doesnโt she?โ
โplease,โ you rasp, the word torn from you in a blissful whimper.
โplease, what?โ yunho becomes more precise and fully engaged, almost analytical. where did the sweet and kind golden boy disappear to? he stops asking, are you okay? and starts deciding what to do, probably influenced by the devil next to you. โuse your words.โ
โpleaseโฆ turn it back on.โ you're so cute when you beg, that they just want to ruin you more.
โbut you were getting too excited,โ wooyoung chides, his fingers digging in slightly. โwe canโt have you finishing without permission. that would be rude.โ
yunho nods, as if considering this. he presses the button and it doesnโt return to the previous peaceful level. it comes back at the highest setting, followed by a violent, immediate buzz that feels less like pleasure and more like an electrical assault. you cry out, the sound strangled, your body seizing. itโs too much, an overwhelming flood that tips straight into overstimulation in a heartbeat when your vision whites out at the edges.
youโre screaming inside at the sensation, a relentless drilling into your pussy that offers no peace. your muscles are locked, shaking with the effort of containing it. you can feel the shameful slickness that has nothing to do with comfort and everything to do with helpless and brutalized arousal.
โso sensitive,โ wooyoung bites your earlobe gently, holding you through, his embrace now less a restraint and more a comfort as you grip his forearm. โone little toy and youโre completely gone.โ
yunho lets it run for what feels like an eternity. just when you think you might genuinely shatter into a million pieces under the onslaught, he drops it again. not to nothing, but back to that maddening and low speed. the drop is cruel as you sob. the makeup you spent so much time on is probably ruined, no matter how waterproof it is. slumping back against wooyoung, the low hum he lets feels like a taunt now, a reminder of what you canโt have.
โi think sheโs learned her lesson,โ he says, but his tone suggests the lesson is far from over. yunho walks over to the couch and crouches in front of you, the remote still in hand. he reaches out with his other hand, his fingers surprisingly gentle as they brush a tear from your cheek, you didnโt even know had fallen.
โyouโre doing so well,โ he says, his gaze holding yours, and you canโt even recognize him. โbut you donโt get to come unless we say so, you understand?โ
he doesnโt wait for an answer. he turns the remote over, shows you the tiny led light indicating itโs active, and the persistent, low-grade vibration continues. wooyoung kisses your cheek to keep you there with him, at least physically, as yunho rises, his shadow falling over you both.
you donโt know how long you have been denied an orgasm; you couldn't, there was no way, and you weren't allowed. those were their rules. it feels like you have been sitting on this couch forever without a second's rest. overwhelmed by the sensation coursing through your body, moaning softly, then whining as you trembled with need, turning to yunho with wide and pleading eyes, who is just observing you coldly like a predator.
โalmost there, hm?โ he whispers, his deep voice sending shivers and goosebumps on your half-naked body. considering the outfit you chose to wear, the cool air hits you like a tornado. the tension in the room thickens as you feel the pleasure and the denial, the toy pulsing against your every response to the pleas of your body. you are desperate, but the thrill of the chase is what they both seem to enjoy and bond over.
โtoo much? not enough? what is it, baby?โ wooyoung mocks you with a playful question. you feel trapped between them, one holding you in place, the other controlling something you canโt. their voices overlap, layering over each other in a constant push and pull of teasing and coaxing, a taunting rhythm that makes it harder to think straight, let alone speak.
yunho, in all his life, never thought heโd enjoy something like this so much. youโre wooyoungโs โ everyone wants you, but you only ever want one man. even so, a selfish thought slips in: he wishes he could take wooyoungโs place, be the one making you react like this and pushing your buttons, pulling you apart piece by piece.
lost in that thought, he doesnโt even realize how far heโs taken it, but the setting has shifted, turned it up to its limit. wooyoungโs sharp voice cuts through first, worried now, snapping him back. he blinks, startled, heart catching as he registers wooyoungโs tone over the sound of your broken breaths and desperate little sounds.
โyunho, turn it the fuck off, you psychopath.โ
without hesitation, his thumb moves, dialing it down to something gentler.ย
wooyoung is already there, hand threading into your hair, slowly soothing you, fingers combing through as his other hand brushes your cheek, soft despite the smirk still playing on his lips, enjoying this just as much as heโs pretending not to.
โitโs okay, breathe.โ youโre still shaking slightly, but wooyoung glances at yunho with narrowed eyes, ones that could easily stop whatever is happening. โsee what you did?โ
โi didnโt think it would go that far,โ yunho exhales, running a hand through his hair, and your man just laughs under his breath.
โsure you didnโt.โ then, softer when he turns to speak to you, fingers continue to soothe through your locks, โiโm sorry, angel. but you seeโฆ even he canโt resist making a mess out of you.โ
despite the toy being set on a lower intensity, you still feel it building, wooyoung does too with the way your legs press tighter together and your back arches slightly. he lets you, easing his hand out of your hair before sliding it beneath your skirt again, pressing the toy a little firmer, shifting it all around to give you what youโve earned. with his other hand, he signals yunho with two fingers, silent but clear: give me the remote back. enough is enough, he wants you back with him now.ย
โcome on, baby. yeahโฆ feels good now, no?โ his voice softening into something almost sweet as your eyes fall shut. your breathing is uneven, but steadier now than it was minutes ago. yunho can only watch, while wooyoung handles you with care.
and then the sweet release crashes through you all at once. finally, after being denied for so long, your body trembles, a soft whimper escaping as overstimulation follows right after. you feel the slick warmth between your thighs and you donโt even care about making a mess on the couch. all you can think about is breathing again, your body going slack as you lean into wooyoung without thinking.ย
thatโs when the doorbell rings, snapping all three of you back to reality. for a second, yunho just stands there, the remote still in his hand, and your uneven breathing still echoing in his ears. this is not new โ at least, not for you and wooyoung. things like this, blurred lines between private and almost public, have existed long before yunho ever got pulled into it. the rest of the group has no idea, and theyโre not meant to; itโs not anyone elseโs business.
even if wooyoung carries that careless, sharing is caring kind of attitude, it only goes so far. perfumes and scents, those things heโll scoff at, roll his eyes over, let slide without much thought. you, though? youโre not something he shares lightly. and yunho can understand it now, because he just stepped into territory that was never his to begin with.
โtake her to the bathroom,โ he says, clearing his throat as he hands the remote back by turning it off, nodding toward the hallway. โiโll handle it.โ
wooyoung nods once, already shifting his focus entirely to you, guiding you up with a hand at your waist as yunho heads toward the door. and just like that, the scene resets. the rest of the guys arrive, the apartment is filled with laughs and loud music, everything looks normal again. but at some point, someone notices the couch.ย
โuhโฆ why is there a stain?โ
wooyoung doesnโt even hesitate to answer, you in his lap. โsorry, i spilled some juice. donโt worry, itโll dry.โ yeah, juiceโฆ your juice.
the party starts all drinking and having fun to celebrate their friend. however, yunho isnโt thinking about the guests or about his achievement in the virtual and social worldโฆ he thinks of how much he can achieve by making you cum on his cock instead of the cushions earlier without the usage of some stupid toy. of course, only if wooyoung lets himโฆ tho doubts he would mind, you are not officially together after all.
ยฉ KISSSAN do not copy, repost or modify my work.
so, hello this is my shortest smut fic yet, and i just wanted to experiment with the formatting and the storytelling ! please, keep in mind that this was my first time writing anything focused on the usage of toys and i know it may be bad and not perfect, since i'm not familiar with this type of nsfw content, but i hope you enjoyed <33
random boyfriend gestures i associate each of them with.
[ย (ateez)ย ] | more random fluff, established relationship, soft thoughts |ย warning/s:ย none, this feels very parasocial
ํ์ค โ ใย hongjoong.ย ใ
โคท always keeps direct eye contact with you when youโre talking to him.ย he wants you to know heโs listening to everything youโre saying. no matter what, heโll stop everything and put his full focus onto what youโre saying. responds with more than just hums or nods, asks questions and gets involved. the way he looks at you never fails to make you blush, words fumbling as you get lost in your own story. hongjoong just laughs, a smirk curling on his lips -ย โitโs okay jagiya, take your time.โ
์ฑํ โ ใย seonghwa.ย ใ
โคท dresses up for every occasion.ย there isnโt a single event or date that you two go on that seonghwa isnโt dressed up for. the money helps but he has incredible fashion sense on his own. it always makes you proud to have a man that cares about his appearance and knows how to use that skill properly, never leaving the house looking anything but incredibly put together - he secretly puts in more effort when he learns this.
์คํธ โ ใย yunho.ย ใ
โคท incredibly patient with you.ย it might seem simple, but he never gets frustrated with you no matter how hard you might be to teach. likes to teach you how to play his favorite video games, and even if you suck, heโll just set his big, warm hands over your own and guide your fingers exactly where they need to be. he just doesnโt know that the reason why you suck is because youโre too busy focusing on the way heโs leaning over you and how good it feels.
์ฌ์ โ ใย yeosang.ย ใ
โคท when heโs trying to focus on something, he always ties his hair up into a loose messy bun,ย with a few stray blonde strands.ย sticks his tongue out as he does whatever heโs doing. you find it so attractive even when heโs simply just reading, watching the way his eyes zone in and with his hair tied back... you just love it when he ties his hair back.
์ฐ โ ใย san.ย ใ
โคท presses kisses to your forehead.ย no matter the occasion, whether youโre upset or heโs leaving or the two of you are just sitting together watching a movie. he likes to remind you that heโs there, so every so often he lean towards you, causing you to blink in surprise, before pressing a soft kiss against your forehead - his lips are always soft.
๋ฏผ๊ธฐ โ ใย mingi.ย ใ
โคท reaching anything thatโs too high.ย even if youโre tall enough to reach something, heโll still make a habit of grabbing it for you. likes being able to do things for you, but mainly itโs because it gives him the chance to subtly show off his muscles, stretching his arm up next to you, leaning in close to you. every single time it takes your breath away, leaving you a flustered mess as he goes back to whatever he was doing before. and every single time he leaves with a shit-eating grin.
์ฐ์ โ ใย wooyoung.ย ใ
โคท sets his hand on your lower back to guide you places.ย doesnโt matter where you are or what youโre doing, every single time heโll be there right behind you, guiding you. makes you feel safe and protected, and he knows which is why he does it. a simple way to show heโs there without having to say anything and the feeling of his hand on your back never fails to cause goosebumps. he also leans close too, letting his breath fan across the back of your neck as he guides you forward.
์ข ํธ โ ใย jongho.ย ใ
โคท gives the absolute best messages.ย never ever complains either. he likes to be able to calm you in any way he can, whether that be when youโre stressed or just simply something to make you comfortable. heโs incredibly good with his hands, knowing exactly where to press or rub - does it without expecting anything in return cause he just wants to make you happy.
๏ฝก๏พ๏พ๏ฝฅ๏ฝก๏ฝฅ๏พ๏พ๏ฝก
๏พใ BUILD A FIC
ใ๏พ ๏ฝก๏ฝฅ
( pick a quote + a feeling + a trope ! letโs see what fic you end up with. )
author's addition: this lil build-a-fic is inspired by @scealaiscoite โ s adorable idea ! her prompt lists are literal perfection. go stalk her blog pls sheโs the best ever ๐งธ youโre welcome to tweak phrasing as needed, but please donโt add to or rewrite the original post. give credits to @fawndrip / @suprclark if using.
โ QUOTE
โ stop smiling like that. itโs distracting. โ
โ you make it really hard to stay just friends. โ
โ why does it feel like a goodbye? โ
โ youโre blushing. โ โ โ no iโm not. โ
โ just friends donโt look at each other like that. โ
โ i missed you. thatโs all. โ
โ you remember the little things. thatโs what gets me. โ
โ tell me to stay. and i will. โ
โ my hand fits so perfectly in yours. it's like i'm made for you. โ
โ do you want me to leave? โ โ โ no. i want you to stay forever. โ
โ i think i knew it was you. even back then. โ โ โ then stay. โ โ โ but that's the thing. i don't know if i know you anymore. โ
โ i donโt know how to stop wanting you. โ
โ this means something. donโt pretend it doesnโt. โ
โ youโre not just anyone. youโre you. โ
โ if we kiss now, everything changes. โ โ โ i know but that's a risk i'm willing to take. โ
โ iโve been in love with you since the night we met. โ
โ tell me it meant nothing. lie if you have to. โ
โ i was easy to leave, wasnโt i? โ
โ you donโt get to miss me now. you lost that right when we broke up. โ
โ say something. anything. please. โ
โ i loved you. that shouldโve been enough. โ
โ i wish i didnโt remember everything. โ
โ donโt look at me like you still care. โ
โ iโm tired of pretending this doesnโt hurt. โ
โ you said forever. i believed you. โ
โ if you didnโt mean it, why did you say it? โ
โ you chose them. you always do. โ
โ i donโt hate you. i just wish iโd never met you. โ
โ you let me go like i was nothing. โ
โ please donโt make this harder than it already is. โ
โ are you sure? cause whatever this is it doesnโt feel like love. โ
โ itโs always been you. i just didnโt know how to say it. โ
โ say that again. i dare you. โ
โ you really donโt see it, do you? โ
โ i think i like you. like, like like you. โ
โ do you always look at people like that? โ
โ you make it really hard to think straight. โ
โ oh my god. youโre blushing. โ
โ this means something. donโt pretend it doesnโt. โ
โ i shouldโve kissed you when i had the chance. โ
โ youโre not helping. youโre being pretty. it's distracting. โ
โ you make me nervous in the best way. โ
โ every time you look at me, i forget what i was saying. โ
โ just admit it. you like me. โ
โ if you donโt kiss me right now, i might explode. โ
โ youโre dangerously good at that smile. โ
โ only one bed โ
โ mutual pining โ
โ fake dating gone real โ
โ friends to lovers โ
โ strangers to almosts โ
โ found family โ
โ rivals with tension โ
โ the โohโ moment โ
โ confessions at 2am โ
โ sunshine x grump โ
โ forbidden โ
โ hurt / comfort โ
โ secretly in love โ
โ reunion after years โ
โ accidental domesticity โ
โ slow burn โ
โ โjust friendsโ denial โ
โ second chances โ
โ love letters never sent โ
โ childhood friends โ
โ exes โ
โ soulmates who donโt believe in fate โ
โ enemies on the same side โ
โ sleep talking confessions โ
โ one falling first, the other falling harder โ
โ patching up wounds with shaky hands โ
โ โwho did this to you?โ โ
โ dancing in the kitchen โ
โ jealousy over nothing ( but also everything ) โ
โ late-night phone calls โ
โ caught in the rain โ
โ almost kissing but someone interrupts โ
โ waking up next to them โ
โ fixing each otherโs tie / collar โ
โ taking care of them while theyโre sick โ
pairing๏นขjeong yunho x fem!reader
genre๏นขsmut. ex-bf!yunho, age gap (reader is 24, yunho is 36), themes of obsessive tendencies and stalking, jealousy, emotional manipulation, slight yandere (if you squint), corruption kink, toxic relationship, dubcon undertones but it turns consensual, cunnilingus, choking, mean dom!yunho, implied size kink/difference [the big dick yunho agenda is real], hate + unprotected sex, missionary + mating press, praising + degradation, overstimulation, orgasm control, tummy bulge, creampie, pet names (doll, babydoll, dollface, angel, pretty girl, etc), minimal aftercare.
synopsis๏นขhe was the only older guy you had ever dated, and you swore you would never do this to yourself again. two years of love, obsession, and control are gone, or at least, thatโs what you thought. some people donโt let go or move on โ he never did. so why does he walk back into your life like nothing ever happened... this time, as your professor?
word count๏นข17,9k
โฆ WATCH THE FIC TEASER โฆ PLAY THE VINYL RECORD
these are the best eleven months of your life after ending the relationship with your now ex-boyfriend. next month you're even thinking of celebrating, because it will mark a whole year. your best friends will definitely treat it like a huge occasion, just like on that fateful day when you handed them the news on a silver platterโฆ they had never been so happy, throwing a small party just for the three of you.
YUNHO was the only older guy you had ever dated, and you swore you would never do this to yourself again. to sum it all up, the relationship turned toxic rather quickly. you almost lost all of your friends, even your two best friends, karina and yeji, who tried their very best to shove some sense into you, but you never listened, delusional enough to believe that you could change him. oh, how naive you were, thatโs why you were so easy to manipulateโฆ
apologies came in the form of very expensive gifts, things you had always wanted, or in gentle kisses and touches that slowly wandered and eventually led to the bedroom, where you ended up naked beneath his covers. you thought it was normal, since every relationship had arguments, but thatโs not what this was about. it was about toxicity, extreme jealousy, possessiveness, maybe even obsession. the man was a literal freak.
karina practically did a full analysis of him, confirming what she had said the very first time you told her about the problems that occurred between you and him: "he's a psychopath." she had been direct, telling you it wasnโt okay and that you needed to break up with him. yeji agreed with her, always wanting the best for you, adding that "older men always want to date someone younger and it's not just because of looksโฆ please be careful."
you suffered once and learned your lesson. enjoying your vacation, cocktail in hand, while the sea breeze drifts past you, the sun hot against your skin as you lounge on the deckchair, slowly tanning. of course, sometimes you still think about the past; you canโt really stop that after spending two whole years with him. yet even though everything had been bad and suffocating, there had been a good side to him too: tall, handsome, funny and somehow rich. what more could you want?
the other thing you wanted was for your parents and close friends not to find out that you had been dating someone not two or three years older, or even a year younger, but a whole twelve years older. yes, you were twenty-one when you met him, a couple of months before your birthday, through mutual friends. one gathering led to another, and before you knew it, you were dating him, convinced you had finally found the one you were going to marry, the only man who truly knew how to be a man. alas, it turned out he was just another shark in the ocean, ready to strike at its defenseless prey.
it doesnโt matter anymore, since youโre single, genuinely happy, enjoying your summer, shining brighter than the sun itself, and everyone sees you like some kind of eternal sunshine. you finally returned to yourself, only smarter this time, no longer falling for tricks or manipulative tactics. life is good when you donโt have a man bitching in your ear about the outfit youโre about to wear or asking why you were talking to some guy for too long. the waiter, if you must specify, who was simply announcing the lunch menu.
โah, canโt believe we have to be back at university that soonโฆโ you said, sipping from your drink while idly chewing on the straw. karina was on your left, glued to her phone, while yeji sat on your right, carefully lining up small seashells along her thighs.
โand weโre graduating this year tooโฆ but someone decided to study at a different university, breaking our teenage dreams,โ karina said as she turned off her phone, glancing at you with a playful look while you rolled your eyes.
โnot my fault the one youโre in didnโt have what i wanted.โ you took another sip, and yeji giggled softly. โnone of us dropped out though, which is an achievement on its own.โ
yes, you didnโt study at the same place as them, but that didnโt stop you from hanging out, if anything, there was even more gossip to share. and so the conversations continued, all the way until you started getting ready for dinner, and then for a few more days after that, until eventually you had to go back to seoul and wish each other โgood luck for the new last year.โ
you really did need some luck, because you had just found out that your favorite professor had retired. you were going to miss the woman; you had been her favorite student, but all good things eventually come to an end. everyone was already sitting in the lecture room. you had heard that the new professor was someone young, but there hadnโt been time to check who exactly he was since they were still fixing schedules and systems. the only thing you knew was that tuesday at nine in the morning was your first lecture with the new professor in question.
โi think he probably used to play basketball or football, i saw him earlier and heโs really tall,โ one of the boys said, and the others quickly agreed, while you remained focused on your phone, scrolling through reel after reel, meme after meme. then you overheard the girls whispering nearby, their voices a little more excited. โdid you see his hands? and him in generalโฆ heโs so fineโฆโ
the problem with having a young professor is exactly that โ he was young, and from what everyone was saying, quite attractive too. the other problem appeared the moment everyone finally sat down when the door opened. a tall figure stepped into the room, his style was effortless in a way that made it impossible not to glance twice. a soft gray cardigan hung loosely over his shoulders, the thin knit falling open enough to reveal the clean white t-shirt beneath.
the muted colors helped him blend in, making him look more like a student than a teacher. slim black pants traced the long lines of his frame, the strap of a black crossbody bag thrown diagonally across his chest, and he wore simple sneakers. his black hair fell in soft layers that framed his face, the strands straight and smooth, cut just long enough to brush the tops of his eyebrows and skim the sides of his cheekbones.
you were sitting a little further back, your phone still in your hands. the room buzzed with chatter as people continued talking among themselves until the professor cleared his throat, the sound cutting clean through the noise as he prepared to introduce himself.
โhello everyone, iโm jeong yunho and iโll be your new photography professor this year.โ
your eyes widened instantly, your head snapping up so fast it almost hurt. oh noโฆ houston, we have a problem. you blinked several times, half expecting your vision to clear and reveal someone else entirely. maybe it was just someone with the exact same name, appearance, and voice. unfortunately for you, it wasnโt. why is your ex-boyfriend the new professor? out of all the people in the capital, it had to be him who got the position.
you sat there frozen in complete shock, your mouth slightly open until your deskmate and close university friend, jeongin, gently pressed a finger under your chin to close it as he leaned to whisper, โi guess everyone, including you, just found their new crush, huh?โ
what, why, and how? was this some kind of twisted karma? because if it was, you definitely werenโt the one who deserved it. your heart started beating faster, anxiety and something close to fear crawling up. could you run away? maybe copy someone elseโs notes, noโฆ you couldnโt. suddenly you wished you were studying metaphysics with karina, because that sounded far more pleasant than this.
โiโd love to get to know all of you,โ he continued, smiling as he set his bag on the desk before leaning back against it, arms loosely crossed, while his gaze moved around the room. โso iโll share a few things about myself. and donโt worry, i wonโt make you do anything today. iโll just introduce the course and explain what i expect from you.โ
surprisingly hands immediately began rising with questions. meanwhile, you were still struggling to believe what you were seeing and hearing. he hadnโt changed at all, you had to admit it. he had only gotten more attractive. always taking care of himself and being unfairly pretty, making you remember how two years ago you thought about what your future children would look like... now you want to throw up. forcing yourself to keep your composure, glancing at jeongin and making a slightly grimaced face. yeah, a crush for sure, except you wanted to crush him into pieces.
โhow old are you, professor?โ someone from the middle rows asked, earning a few curious murmurs from the class, making yunho chuckle, โstraight to the personal questions already? alright then. iโm thirty-six.โ
everyone was surprised by the answer, and all kinds of reactions rippled through.
โdonโt look so shocked,โ he added with a small grin. โi promise iโm not that ancient.โ
โare you a full-time professor?โ another student asked.
โnot exactly,โ yunho replied, pushing his sleeves up slightly as he spoke, revealing his forearms, โiโm a professional photographer first. i mainly work in editorial and commercial photography such as fashion shoots, campaigns, exhibitions, that sort of thing. teaching is something i enjoy doing on the side, especially with students who are serious about the craft.โ
โdoes that mean youโre going to give us easy grades?โ someone joked, making him raise an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth lifting. โabsolutely not.โ
the class laughed again, a little nervous this time.
โi can be friendly,โ he added, shrugging lightly, โbut donโt mistake that for me being tolerant. photography is about discipline and perspective. if youโre here just to press a button and hope for the best, youโre going to struggle.โ
another hand went up. โsoโฆ we wonโt pass easily?โ
โcorrect,โ nodding his head once. โi expect effort, creativity, and consistency. if you work hard, youโll do amazing. if you donโtโฆโ he paused briefly before smiling again, โyou wonโt pass this course by simply showing up and smiling at me. well, at least youโll get some nice pictures out of the experience.โ
more chuckles followed, but the message had landed. the atmosphere quickly became relaxed and comfortable as he answered questions with small jokes. the students were already warming up to him, clearly charmed by how easygoing he was. as you listened to him speak, watched the way he carried himself so seriously and correctly in front of everyone, you couldnโt help but wonder where exactly all that cheerful composure had been when he was with you?
โattendance is mandatory.โ and then his gaze settled directly on yours, a faint smirk pulling at his lips as he stared straight into your soul, the one he had almost taken from you a year ago. โof course, if you have to be absent, itโs not a problem, as long as it doesnโt happen often. i know some of you will be at the mall with friends. also i donโt grade by email; everything you do will be shown and discussed in class.โ
the entire time he spoke, his eyes kept drifting back to you. when he paced slowly across the front of the room, even when he turned to answer someone elseโs question, somehow his attention always circled back. for some reason, you held his gaze instead of looking away, and the longer you stared at him, the more that fear slowly faded until all that remained was pure hatred.
jeongin leaned slightly closer to you, lowering his voice into a teasing whisper. โwell there goes our plan of skipping class to eat kfcโฆ or getting more sleep,โ he murmured, nudging your arm lightly.
thank god your best friends studied at different universities, otherwise they would have dragged you straight to the administration office and forced you to drop out for real. and honestlyโฆ you were starting to think about it yourself. the worst part was that you couldnโt switch the class for anything else. great, truly amazing. you were trapped for an entire semester.
โthatโs everything for today,โ yunho said after a while, clapping his hands together once as he was done answering questions and talking about cameras, โi wonโt keep you any longer. enjoy the rest of your morning.โ
chairs scraped across the floor as everyone began packing their things, the room filling with chatter again. you grabbed your purse quickly, already standing up before most people had even processed that the lecture was over. as you walked out with jeongin, you noticed a small crowd forming around the professorโs desk. a couple of boys and girls had already gathered there, asking questions, laughing at something he said, clearly eager to stay a little longer.
you didnโt even glance his way. no goodbye, or a polite โhave a nice dayโ, because he didnโt deserve to have one. you just kept walking toward the door, hoping that you would manage to graduate before the sudden temptation to drop out started looking a little too appealing.
โyour analysis lacks depth,โ yunho says, placing your paper on his desk, making you scoff, since this is the third time now that heโs returned it for edits. lacks depth, he saysโฆ well, you did as well, asshole. if you had to edit one more thing, it honestly wouldnโt be that bad to buy a gun, and no, it definitely wouldnโt be pointed at your head.
every single tuesday he calls on you far too often in class. your assignments always come back covered in detailed comments, red ink everywhere like a declared war on your academics. you swear heโs grading you harder than everyone else, which honestly seems unfair to the people who are actually doing nothing. apparently, youโre the only one being treated like a social experiment.
โand what exactly do i need to change again, professor?โ you ask, grinning through your teeth, burying every thought that would probably send you straight to jail under a perfectly fake smile. youโre this close from going insane, feeling that familiar anger rise again, the irritation that always appears when youโre forced to deal with someone you canโt stand.
for the last four weeks, your life has been hell, to say the least. during lectures heโll ask a question, several hands go up while yours remain fiddling with a ballpoint pen, and yet he always picks you. and the first time you didnโt know the answer, what followed was a casual, โit would be nice to learn things before the test, hm?โ which felt like complete humiliation, because beneath that joking tone there had been something that definitely wasnโt a joke.
once you and jeongin arrived ten minutes late, which honestly wasnโt even your fault. what were you supposed to do when your friend insisted on waiting for his coffee while there was already a long line that early in the morning? of course, a comment followed: โplease be on time next time.โ but when someone else walked in thirty minutes late during the same lecture, there were absolutely no remarks.
thatโs exactly why you always come prepared with answers and make sure youโre always on time. you know his tricks far too well. no matter how charming his smile is, how sweetly he talks, how funny and relaxed he seemsโฆ itโs just one of his many masks. karina really was right about him being some kind of psychopath.
everyone else, unfortunately, loves the new professor. they talk about his fun classes, how nice he is, and how cool it is that heโs such a professional teaching them new techniques. some of your peers even linger after lectures just to chat with him. meanwhile, you sit there thinking that your older ex should seriously consider enrolling in acting instead of photography, because the performance heโs putting on deserves ample shiny awards proudly displayed on a goddamn mantlepiece.
the whole thing has turned into some twisted cat-and-mouse game. he teases, pushes, and provokes. you glare, don't bite back, and refuse to give him the reaction he clearly wants. despite all of that, he always finds his sneaky ways toย make your life a little more miserable.
here and there, he calls you to his desk after class for absolutely no reason. โyou should consider approaching a different lens for your next project,โ like this couldnโt have easily been written in a single email. or heโll start explaining camera settings you already know perfectly well, dragging the conversation out while the rest of the class disappears into the hallway.
and god forbid you see him outside the classroom. the moment you notice him walking down the hallway, you immediately pull a perfect one-eighty and walk in the opposite direction because you hate this man so fucking much, you refuse to breathe the same air as him.
whatโs more upsetting is that you canโt even tell anyone. because if karina and yeji ever found out that your toxic ex-boyfriend was now your professor, they wouldnโt hesitate for a second before throwing a chair at him.
what you donโt know, however, is that he requested this university job partly because of you. actually, not partly at all, he knew exactly what he was doing. even when you were still together, he knew where you studied and what major you were in, just like you knew about his photography work. of course, teaching also gave him the chance to try something different in his career. and what better opportunity than this? his unbelievably beautiful ex-girlfriend just so happened to be one of his students, completely unplanned.
and it doesnโt stop there, oh no, everything is just starting.
jeongin begins to notice a pattern, which honestly isnโt hard to miss when during class yunho asks another question. probably ten hands rise into the air, but he still chooses you. your friend leans closer to your ear and whispers, โyou must be his favorite~โ
you stare at the board like you want to burn it down, alongside mister pretty devil himself, who of course, happens to wear clothes that fit his figure perfectly, fuck him honestly. โif i was his favorite, do you think iโd be studying camera obscura in this much detail?โ
not to mention the way he addresses you with that smooth voice, softly calling you, โmiss (name).โ the moment you hear it, itโs game over. you have to respond with โyes, professor,โ or โyes, sir,โ like some twisted academic roleplay you never signed up for. it makes you want to vomit, bleach both your eyes and your trachea. you hate his guts so much. he has always liked being in control, and now he has it again, at least within the walls of this campus. outside of it, however, he has absolutely none.
when it comes to homework and assignments, everyone else receives short feedback, brief but explanatory enough to understand their mistakes, things like: โgood compositionโ or, โnice lightingโ and even, โif you try a black and white effect, it might work better.โ
your feedback, on the other hand, is practically a full essay. it could probably qualify as a documentary script because he covers everything, even the tiniest details. he has a ridiculously keen eye for things, which apparently also makes him a professional at being a complete jerk who picks on you for absolutely no reason.
โyour framingโฆ well, itโs technically correct,โ he muses, tapping the printed photo with his finger exactly where he seems most dissatisfied, โbut technically correct isnโt the same as emotionally effective.โ
you want to throw your camera at him and shove the lens straight down his throat, as the class sits there admiring him. โwow, professor jeong gives such thoughtful feedback.โ
it also happens that heโs constantly spammed with emails from students asking if their work is passable or what more theyย can do to improve their visuals, so eventually he announces loudly, โif anyone needs extra help, my office hours are wednesday and thursday afternoon.โ
later that same day, only you receive an email: โyour project concept has potential. come to discuss it.โ
you go, of course, because you care about the grade. knocking on the door to his office, and he lets you in, acting like the two of you are complete strangers. the entire conversation stays professional, purely academic, every word measured, but the tension makes your heartbeat faster. after ten painfully long minutes, you finally stand to leave, and just as your hand reaches the door, he says, that same smile on his face, โdonโt sabotage your own work out of stubbornness.โ
almost slamming the door behind you, but you need to have self-control and not let him know that you are slowly losing your cool.
it goes without saying that the girls in the course absolutely adore him. some of them simp for him, always giggling and gossiping. โthe way he looked at me todayโฆ he said he is single, so do you think i have a chance?โ or โheโs literally the most handsome professor here, why isnโt my boyfriend like him?โ
you almost choke hearing that, because you know the other version of him. the one who used to kiss apologies into your neck after fights. the one whose hands knew every point of your body andwho knew you better than you knew yourself. fingers that always seemed to know exactly where to press, where toโฆ why are you even thinking about that?
during one of his lectures, yunho suddenly says something that makes your stomach twist.
โphotography is about obsession. you need to want the subject more than anything else. you have to focus on it completely if you want to capture the perfect shot.โ
you freeze, eyes widening slightly at his words, because you know exactly how obsessive he can be. yunho glances at you, that smug little smile appears again, and he continues the lecture as if nothing happened.
itโs almost nightfall when the young professor arrived home. he dropped onto the couch, leaving his bag on the floor beside it, his head falling back against the cushions as he stretched his legs over the small wooden table and stretched his arms up above his head.
he exhaled once, then again, tapping his thigh with his fingers in the quiet that filled the apartment. the silence didnโt last long before a small laugh slipped past his lips. he closed his eyes, and of course, you appeared in his mind again. you were constantly there, living somewhere between his thoughts and his heart, occupying space you had no right to anymore.
werenโt you just adorable? each and every time you walked into class, you were dressed better than everyone else, always prepared and looking at him with that sneer that no one else seemed to notice. not even your deskmate, the one he sometimes caught himself glaring at out of pure irritation and jealousy, though he knew jeongin wasnโt any real threat.
you were his muse, his fallen angel, the pliable doll he had once controlled so carefully until two other puppets, your dear best friends, stepped in and cut the marionette strings, ruining the entire show. you had been so kind-hearted and obedient, so sweet and perfectly made for himโฆ but everything had ended so quickly.
yunho knew exactly how to push your buttons; it was too easy for him. he watched every little reaction, the glares you tried to hide behind forced politeness. he fed on it more than he probably should have. still obsessed with you and completely unable to let go, hiding it well enough behind the role of a professor.ย
you were his one weakness, the sensitive gap between two ribs guarding the heart he had, the one thing that made the control he prided himself on slip through his fingers. he had never stopped loving you, at least not in his own twisted way. goddamnit, you looked like an absolute doll today. the dress, the way your hair fell over your shoulders, the gloss on your lips. were you going on a date with someone? with who? when? where? normally he would have known already. the thought made his jaw tighten slightly, tongue pushing the inside of his cheek. if it wasnโt for the university schedule taking up so much of his time lately, he would have kept better track of things. he hoped you werenโt going on a date with anyone.
reaching for his phone, unlocking it as he opened one of the many accounts he used. your instagram appeared on the screen, and even though your profile was private, that had never really stopped him. the pretty much convincing fake account had been accepted months ago and you had never questioned it. he doesnโt just have one fake account, there are several, each with a different purpose: one follows you, the second follows your friends, the third follows men who comment on your photos.
his thumb scrolled slowly through the posts, stopping at one in particular.
you standing by the ocean with goldensunlight catching your skin, wearing that stupidly beautiful dress that he bought. the same vacation he had surprised you with, and the irony was that he had been the one holding the camera when those pictures were taken, and then his scrolling stopped when he saw you had a story posted.
you sitting across from someone in a restaurant, a glass in your hand, smiling. the caption tagged someoneโฆ jaemin? the quiet apartment suddenly didnโt feel so quiet anymore. yunho stared at the screen a little longer than necessary, his fingers tightening slightly around the phone. he decided to do his research, and within minutes, he knew jaeminโs major, his other social media, his schedule and which classes he attends.
โso you were going on dates now, huh?โ his hand ran slowly across his face before he leaned back against the couch again, letting out a low breath that almost sounded like a mocking laugh. he shouldnโt care, and whatโs left of his sanity knew that, but something in his chest twisted like a scalding hot knife. the truth was simple, and it irritated him more than anything else.
his home still has traces of you. your favorite mug still in the kitchen, a sweater you forgot draped over a chair, the perfume bottle you left behind on the bathroom counter. he hasnโt moved them at all, so when passing them heโll sometimes pause, observing your belongings like theyโre priceless artifacts he forever wants to keep.
a drawer in his desk contains a perfectly organized stack of polaroids. shots he took of you while you were dating, containing multiple domestic situations of you laughing on the beach, asleep on his shoulder and drooling, you looking annoyed while he teased you endlessly, you wearing his hoodieโฆ thereโs a lot, some even nudes taken during private moments when you trusted him. nothing is displayed openly, but preserved with a date written on the back, sometimes a short note, things like mine or xoxo.
as a photographer, he justifies it to himself as art. in his mind those photos were the purest versions of you, deleting them would feel like destroying masterpieces. the man doesnโt see anything wrong with it. they were taken with consent back then, and the memories belong to him, so he never questions keeping them.
though, admittedly, yunho still adds to the collection with printed screenshots from your instagram stories. blurry shots of you crossing campus, a candid photo of you mid-laughter taken from far away during a university event. he keeps a hidden folder on his computer, where inside are hundreds of photos and videos, not just from when you dated, but also recent ones.
sometimes he records his lectures for teaching review, as the university demands, and in private, heโll rewind parts where you speak. listening again, and again, and again, so he can get off with his dick in hand, trying to chase his high from being turned on by watching you argue with him in class. she still looks at me the same wayโฆ anger is better than indifference. your hatred is still attention, and attention for men like him is oxygen.
he studies those images and compares them to how you look in class now. noticing the differences in the way you dress, how you glare at him and refuse to look at him too longโฆ she pretends she doesnโt belong to me anymore.
also your old professor who retired? yunho knew her; she was a well-known photographer in seoul, a colleague of his whose exhibitions he had attended more than once over the years. during a gallery event, the two of them talked for a while, as she casually mentioned that she would be retiring soon and that the university needed someone to take her place. then she also mentioned that one of her best students would be graduating soon. the way she spoke about that student caught yunhoโs attention immediately. the woman even pulled out her phone, scrolling through photos from one of the class exhibitions before zooming in on a familiar face โ yours.
the elder woman happily explained how talented you were, the potential you had and how you were easily one of her favorites.
that was when he applied to the university, under her recommendation.
yunho finally stood from the couch and walked toward his bedroom. he opened the drawer of his bedside table, reaching inside until his fingers brushed against a familiar photograph: a polaroid from two years ago.
you were laughing in it, leaning slightly toward a cake with him beside you on your 22nd birthday. the faint lipstick mark you had playfully pressed onto the corner of the photo was still there, and he ran his thumb slowly over it. he just stared at it, placing the polaroid carefully on the nightstand beside his phone and the nightlamp. when he finally lay down under the covers, the photograph remained within reach, the faint outline of your smile visible in the dim light.
he closed his eyes, hoping, as he drifted toward sleep, that maybe tonight you would appear in his dreams.
fridays are always a godsend, especially after sitting through a lecture with the devil the day before. anything feels better after that, especially when youโre out for lunch with jaemin. sunlight spilling through the windows, soft chatter around you, and for the first time in a while you feel at ease. he insisted on paying, of course, saying something about how you โdeserve to be spoiled properly,โ and honestlyโฆ you didnโt argue.
he knows what you like. not in a suffocating way that feels like heโs memorized you without permission. but in a very gentle and attentive way.
โare you free tomorrow?โ he asks, stealing a bite of your cake like itโs his.
โi wish,โ you sigh. โi have to attend a birthday party with my parents.โ
โmm,โ he hums, pretending to think, though the smile on his lips gives him away. โguess iโll have to reschedule my very important plan of kidnapping you for the evening.โ
you chuckle softly, taking another bite of the sweet treat. โyouโre not funny.โ
โiโm hilarious,โ he corrects you, lifting his index finger. โyouโre just in denial.โ
rolling your eyes, but you canโt hide the smile that appears on your face. the thing you really liked about jaemin was how sweet-talking and funny he was, knowing what to say at any given moment. he has this mischievous side, but he was also very loving and attractive.ย
โi was going to ask you to come over,โ he adds more quietly, almost shy beneath the teasing. โbutโฆ another time.โ
that makes you pause, because he doesnโt push or corner you. more so, never demands you to be with him and cancel any plans you have already made with someone else. itโs like an option, not an expectation. thereโs no hidden trap set ahead of time for you to fall into.
โmaybe next weekend?โ you echo, that playful tone came as you asked him, looking at him for a moment, and then down at the already finished cake. and thatโs enough for him. his bright and boyish grin returns instantly, like he didnโt just make your heart skip.
โsee? progress. next thing you know, youโll admit you like me.โ
โdonโt get ahead of yourself,โ you warn, pointing your fork at him.
โtoo late, i already did.โ
โjaeminโโ
โwhat?โ he leans in slightly, eyes sparkling with that same mischievousness. โyou gonna hit me?โ
you narrow your eyes. โif you keep talking, maybe.โ
he gasps dramatically, pretending to be scared for his life, โnot the man-hater queen threatening violence again.โ
โi am not a man-hater!โ
โyou are when it comes to me.โ
โyouโre annoying.โ
โand who is paying the bill?โ
that shuts you up completely. instead of teasing you more, he just smiles, playfully winking at you, letting you have that moment.
after lunch, he insists on walking you to the mall so you can meet up with karina and yeji. itโs not far, twenty minutes at most, but he acts like itโs a whole event, a met gala of sorts, and you should be escorted like the princess you are. you walk side by side, hands brushing at first, then naturally finding each other, fingers lacing together. the weather is warm for the autumn season. leaves crunch when people pass by, cars hum in the distance, and for a while, you forget about yunho and about everything.
jaemin talks about random things like how he and jeno tried to summon ghosts as kids, jokes about what he saw online, and somehow, youโre laughing again without having to worry or trying to come up with excuses or reasons of how you can be so happy when something else gives you joy? he looks at you with adoration in his eyes and thatโs what makes you feel safe.
when you reach the mall, he slows down, not letting go of your hand immediately. he lingers for a second, like he wants to say something else, then just smiles.
โhave fun, man-hater queen.โ
โthank you, cake thief.โ
he laughs, finally letting go but not before leaving a quick, soft kiss on your cheek. โtext me when you get home,โ he says, and you nod, a little stunned by this bold yet sweet gesture. he walks off with a smile, and your best friends are already waiting for you inside at the usual meeting spot.ย
the moment karina spots you, sheโs already sprinting, grabbing yeji by the wrist and dragging her along like sheโs on a mission. itโs been weeks since you last saw each other, university has been kicking all of your asses, and you didnโt realize how much you needed this until now.
โ(name), babe, how are you? you donโt know how much we missed you,โ karina squeals, letting go of yeji just to throw her arms around you in a near-death hug. you laugh, breath knocked out of you for a second before hugging her back.ย
โi missed you, too,โ you manage, and then yeji is right there, pulling you into her own hug, softer but just as tight. โand you donโt know what i have to tell you.โ
โjaemin?โ they ask in unison, already cocking their brows up.
โhow did you know?โ
yeji nodded her head towards the glass storefront behind you. โwe can literally see you from outside.โ
โhe walked you here, didnโt he?โ karina snorts and you donโt even deny it. thatโs enough to send both of them into giggles as they hook their arms through yours, dragging you further into the mall.
the next hour follows itโs rhythm. gossip, teasing, overlapping conversations, with you telling them about jaemin and the date earlier, how attentive he is without being overbearing. sometimes you catch yourself thinking you donโt deserve someone like that. someone so patient and sweet, but karina shuts that down immediately, while yeji nods along, reminding you that the bare minimum just feels extraordinary after what youโve been through.
what you donโt tell themโฆ is everything else. you donโt mention yunho, not a single word leaves your mouth. it sits somewhere in the back of your mind, tucked away like it doesnโt even exist. they deserve to know, you know they do, but you donโt even know where to start, or how theyโd react. andโฆ youโre not ready for that, to lose them, so you stay quiet. maybe sometimes silence is the solution.
you move from store to store, bags slowly piling up in your hands. makeup is a priority, youโre running low, and soon enough, youโre standing in front of rows of lipsticks, testing shades against your skin. just for a second in your peripheral vision, you catch a tall figure, standing a few meters away. you turn your head, and nothing. you blink, frowning slightly. thatโsโฆ weird. you couldโve sworn someone was there.
โ(name), come here, we found the new face masks,โ yeji pops up out of nowhere, grabbing your arm and pulling you along before you can think about it too much. โtheyโre not even that expensive like everyone says.โ
letting yourself be dragged away as the rest of the day passes in a blur of chatter and shopping bags. trying on clothes and spending money like you were the granddaughter of a very wealthy ceo. maybe in a past life you were rich, because right now, money seems to disappear the second it touches your hands.ย
by the time you finally sit down for coffee, you take a slow sip of your ice-cold drink, letting the sweetness settle on your tongue as you listen to karina and yeji talk. your social battery was starting to fade, and you were also running out of things to gossip about, content on just listening instead of talking.
for a moment, everything is fine as it should be, until you get that feeling again, like someoneโs watching. you glance up, eyes scanning the space around you, but everything looks normal. people talking, walking, laughing, nothing out of placeโฆ. you shift slightly in your seat, fingers tightening around your cup. probably your brain is messing up with you after the tiring day you had.
the day started on like that โ him following, and you being completely unaware.
he saw you earlier and was there during the whole date. he doesnโt hate jaemin even if jealousy spikes, but he quickly calms himself down. the younger man is just a temporary placeholder, a distraction you picked up because you didnโt know what else to do with the space yunho left behind. his tongue presses briefly against the inside of his cheek, a habit surfacing whenever irritation starts to settle in. he already knows what to order; heโs been here beforeโฆ with you. at this restaurant, same table across the room, known for its delicate pasta and overly sweet desserts you always claimed you wouldnโt finish.
itโs wrong, not because youโre laughing and enjoying yourself, but because itโs not with him.ย
he watches the way jaemin leans in when he talks, how quickly he smiles, casually reaching for your plate, how comfortable he acts like heโs already earned a place he doesnโt deserve. jaemin doesnโt notice the smaller things like the shift in your posture, the way your fingers tighten around your fork when youโre thinking too much, the way your eyes drift when your mind starts wandering. he sees whatโs in front of him, nothing more.
yunho sees everything.
he doesnโt need to chase you. he never will. you come back on your own. anger, frustration, curiosity, it doesnโt matter what drives you, it always leads back to him. because no one else will ever know how to handle you the way he does. he doesnโt want a version of you thatโs easy. he wants the one who pushes and bites back to keep the spark alive.
you think you hate him, he can see it in your eyes. hatred means you still care; you react because you are affected. indifference would be a problem. but youโre not indifferent, just confused, pretending not to see whatโs already there. he missed you. not just your voice, your presence, or your body. he missed this, the way you draw him in without even trying, like a moth to a flame.
he could have walked up to you right now. say your name to strike up a conversation as your professor. what a coincidence, right? you and he in the same place, at the same time, ordering the same food. your expression would drastically change; he knows exactly what it would look like. heโs imagined it enough times, but he doesnโt move.
he doesnโt rush things anymore, learning that the hard way. you need to feel like you have space and the freedom to choose. so he waits, and thatโs fine, yunho understands. after all, youโre already hisโฆ you just havenโt admitted it to yourself yet.
it was getting late, and when you finally said goodbye to your friends, heโs already on the move. you donโt seem to notice how he chooses the same subway train, standing where the reflection in the window does the work for him, watching you through the blur of the passing lights and shadows.
youโre on your phone for a while, and by the movement of your fingers, you are scrolling through instagram or tiktok. then you are staring ahead, you always get like this when your energy runs out. he knows the exact moment your thoughts start drifting and when exhaustion takes over.
someone dares to look at you for too long. yunho burns holes with bloodshot eyes as the stranger looks away. the train slows at your stop, and you step out. he follows by matching your speed, always out of sight. footsteps always a few seconds behind, stops when you stop. heโs walked this path more times than youโd ever guess. yunhoโs gaze moves over everything on the street: the corners, people walking and the cars passing by, the distance between you and anything that could get too close.
you reach your building and pause for a second, opening your purse for your keys. heโs already stopped, waiting for you to step inside. the door closes behind you, as he stays where he is. his eyes lift, scanning the building, counting without thinking how long it would take to reach your floorโฆ it should be one minute and twenty-three seconds.
he waits a little longer, enough to see the second light flicker in your bedroom. itโs the same every night with him walking you back home. what if you hadnโt come back alone? what if some creep had followed you? that wouldnโt have ended well, not for them.
his shoulders finally relax as he turns away. to anyone else, that would be the end of it. just a random man on the streetโฆ even if his home is in the opposite direction, thirty-five minutes away. hands sliding into his pockets, the quiet jingle of metal breaks the silence with each step. a small cluster of keys, shifting against each other, and one tucked among them does not belong to him. his thumb brushes over it absentmindedly; it has always been there.
yunho still has a key to your place. sometimes he visits when youโre not there, and he always knows when that is. why does he do it? even the divine beings donโt seem interested in answering that, and they donโt want to interfere either. what is he doing in your apartment? nothing, he goes there when he wants to rest. he doesnโt move things around or leave signs. he just sits on your couch and enjoys the atmosphere you created.
your bedroom door stays open, so he doesnโt need to enter to know if anything has changed. heโs like a ghost, maybe a poltergeist, one that doesn't haunt by moving objects but stealing them instead.ย
he opens drawers sometimes. the most familiar one is always the same โ the drawer with your underwear. never takes anything new or expensive, always the ones at the bottom. old pairs, the pieces you donโt think about anymore, and you wouldnโt even notice are missing.
itโs proximity, a way for him to be close to you, or for you to be close to him.ย
in the living room, thereโs a plush toy you never threw away. he gave it to you when you celebrated your six-month anniversary. it still sits in its place, untouched and harmless-looking. except it isnโt. inside it, carefully hidden where no one would think to look, is a small camera. he watches from time to time, when he needs to. nothing invasive, just enough for him to see you when youโre home.
someone has to make sure you get home safe, even if you donโt know it, and if it has to be him, then so be it.ย
your father had a lot of friends, and it just so happened that your family was invited to mr. kimโs 50th birthday, an anniversary celebrated in a rather grand and luxurious way. honestly, it felt more like a wedding than a birthdayโฆ but either way, it was still an occasion for drinking. people of notoriety greeted each other left and right, laughter and chatter filling the air, until the man of the hour finally made his entrance, the one who had every right to celebrate until the very last drop and bite were gone.
โif this isnโt my one and only goddaughter?โ it should probably be mentioned that this kind and ridiculously rich man was your godfather. no blood relation, but he had always been like an uncle to you. the affluent oneย who spoiled you endlessly as a child, giving you everything you wanted, because clearly your parents failed to treat you like the princess you deserved to be.
โhappy birthday, uncle minseok!โ you said, stepping forward to hug him, genuinely happy to see him. the gifts were still left by the entrance, but you always had your own little privileges. โthis is for you, i hope you like itโฆ even if you are getting old.โ
inside the small wrapped bag was a simple package of marshmallows, as your mother immediately noticed, lightly tapping your shoulder. โ(name), this is inappropriate.โ
โcalm down,โ minseok laughed warmly, taking the bag from your hands without a second thought. โshe knows exactly what to give someone.โ he glanced at you with a grin, because this candy has become very significant during the years, something small but from the heart. โthank you, my dear. youโll get the second piece of cake.โ
the evening continued with drinks being passed around, conversations flowing about business, and whatever gossip caught your ear. at some point, your godfather rested a hand on your shoulder, โcome, thereโs someone i want you to meet,โ he said casually, guiding you through the crowd. โa very dear friend of mine, and an excellent photographer. you might learn a thing or two.โ
you didnโt think much of it at first, nodding as you followed along, heels clicking softly against the polished floor, your drink still in hand. this would be just another introduction for you to smile at a stranger. this would hopefully be someone you could form a connection with to help you in the future when you do decide to pursue a career, but just like that, everything in your body turned upside down. your entire world tilted and your pulse quickened, because of course it had to be him.
dressed like absolute sin in a suit that made it painfully obvious he knew exactly what he was doing. professional and put togetherโฆ but unlike on campus, where he toned it down by being casual and relatable to young people your age, here amongst people closer to his age and high calibre, he wasnโt holding back. the clothes fit him perfectly, outlining his frame in a way that makes you force yourself not to react โ masking your expression into something neutral that doesn't scream what the hell are you doing here.
โyunho,โ minseok called out, catching his attention. โah, perfect timing, indeed. i want you to meet someone.โ
yunho turned, and for a split second, his eyes met yours. there it was, that familiar recognition, gone just as quickly as it appeared. his own expression of shock smoothed out instantly, slipping into that same composed mask you had grown to despise.
โthis is my goddaughter, (name),โ minseok continued proudly, squeezing your shoulders by the exposed skin your dress created. โsheโs studying photography as well.โ
you swallowed and played along, like you were meeting him for the very first time. as if you didnโt know the way his hands felt, or how his voice sounded when it wasnโt calm and controlled, the way he used to look at you when no one else was aroundโฆ as if you hadnโt let him take your virginity.ย
โitโs a pleasure to meet you,โ you said, offering your hand with a polite smile that stung like acid to hold. his gaze lingered for just a moment too long before he took it. warm and bigger than yours, soft too, just like it always has been, perfectly made to fit.
โthe pleasure is all mine, miss (name),โ yunho replied, smiling at you, and god, you hate how natural he makes it sound, like youโre nothing more than a stranger heโs just been introduced to. but of course, he doesnโt stop there. the pad of his thumb brushes lightly against your knuckles before he lets go.
it wasnโt awkward, more likeโฆ unsettling in a way that made your skin itch. it wasnโt just that you saw him every week at the university, no, now he was here too, at an event where you were supposed to have fun, not stand there thinking of at least five different ways to get away with his murder. your godfather, completely unaware of the tension, patted your shoulder before turning to yunho. โiโll leave her in your care, and (name), you might want to take some photos now that itโs still not too crowded. have fun, kiddos.โ
and just like that, minseok walked away, leaving you alone with the man you hated the most.
your blood started boiling like molten lava almost instantly. the fake smile dropped the second his back disappeared into the crowd, your nails digging into your palms as you inhaled slowly through your nose and you stared at yunho with pure and undisguised hatred.
"you know it's not very polite to stare." he was fixing something on the camera, or looking at photos, you didn't know, but you knew one thing, and that was that you hated him. โso, how is your project going? did you fix what i told you to?โย
you stiffen for a split second, your smile tightening as you look at him, because of course he would say that here, of all places, since he just couldnโt resist torturing outside campus.
โi wasnโt aware this was a consultation,โ you reply sweetly, but your tone carries that hostile warning of a bark that tells him you are about to bite like an angry dog.
โold habits,โ he hummed softly, deleting a few blurred pictures.
โyeah?โ you shot back, one eyebrow rising, โthen maybe you should work on dropping a few of them.โ
โthat explains a lot.โ the way he calmly answers makes you want to punch him.
โexplains what exactly? you enjoying your little performance? youโre very convincing, iโll give you that.โ
โi donโt know what you mean,โ he says lightly, though the way he looks at you says the exact opposite. liar. something about the way youโre talking back instead of ignoring him, clearly tells him one thing โ you havenโt moved on completely.
โyou still get worked up so easily,โ murmuring almost to himself, but loud enough for you to hear.
โyou still talk too much,โ you snapped, and he took a step closer, enough to close some of the distance, his presence more noticeable and intimidating, and you sometimes forget how tall he actually is.
a small smile tugged at his lips because, truth be told, he was enjoying this far too much. his eyes were scanning your face, studying every reaction of the grimace you tried so hard to hide. you scoffed, crossing your arms, tapping your freshly done nails against your skin, irritation written all over, and for a moment neither of you spoke. the noise of the party faded into the background as the tension stretched like silk almost pulled to the point of tearing between you.
then yunho exhaled softly, removing the camera strap from his head, he closed the lens cap and put it back in the small bag, leaving it on the desk he evidently used for work here.
โwhat about we take a walk?โ yunho suddenly suggests, tone light, sounding harmless and innocent. โtalk a few things out. it seems like you have a lot to say.โ
you should have said no. you shouldโve walked straight back to your parents while ignoring him like youโve been fighting tooth and nail to do, but somehowโฆ you didnโt. maybe it was the tone of his voice, coaxing you with the way he said it like a suggestion, not a command, even though it somehow felt like one. or maybe it was just him, knowing exactly what to say, with just the right intonation for invitation.
โfine,โ you muttered, big mistake.
he guided you through the venue, away from the main crowd and toward a quieter part of the hotel where the noise began to dullย and the lights softened because fewer people meant fewer distractions. now itโs just you and him, the way heโs been craving and aching for.
then he stopped.
reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a pack of cigarettes. you frowned slightly as he pulled out a cigarette, placing it between his lips before lighting it and exhaling slowly, white smoke curling between the two of you before dissipating into the air.ย
โyouโre smoking again?โย
โyouโre staring again.โ
โiโm judging,โ you correct. โi thought you quit.โ
โi did,โ he agrees, โfor you.โ
then he takes another drag, eyes never leaving yours, but you know you were the main reason, if not the only one, for him to quit. you hated the smell and the taste that transferred once you shared a kiss. or two. or dozenโฆ neither of you ever bothered to count.
โstress does things, work, lifeโฆ you find ways to relieve the tension,โ he continues after a moment, carefully choosing every word to get a reaction out of you. he shares just enough, mentioning that the workload and the pressure made him go back to this bad habit, skimming over the real reason without ever actually saying it โ the break up. of course, he wouldnโt admit that to you. he never gives you the full truth, only carefully selected pieces.ย
and as he speaks, you find yourself checking him out. you feel steel heavy shame that you are, but you canโt help it. he looksโฆ good. no, thatโs an understatement. dressed like he stepped out of some magazine, a black coat draped over his broad shoulders, a clean white button-up tucked neatly under a fitted black vest, finished off with a loosely worn black satin tie. as much as you want to deny it, to lie to yourself, roll your eyesโฆ you canโt. when it comes to jeong yunho, all bets are off, because heโs so fucking hot.
yunho stubs out the cigarette, pressing it into the ashtray beside him. youโre both sitting on the edge of a small staircase, tucked away from most of the guests, the noise of the party distant like background static.
then, without much thought, he shrugs off his coat and throws it over his shoulder. the movement is simple, but it draws your attention to his rolled sleeves, exposing his slim but defined forearms, his veins faintly visible under the skin. his cords of muscle hold subtle tension that make it really goddamn difficult not to look. it gives him this quiet intensity, composed on the surface but never fully restrained underneath. a wildfire raging beneath a perfectly composed surface.
you really try to look away, only to realize something else, that you didnโt bring a jacket. youโre wearing a short black dress, feminine shoulders bare, the evening air cooler than you expected. it hadnโt mattered before since you wonโt stay outside the venue all night, and yet before you can even think about it properly, warmth settles around you.ย
snapping out of your thoughts, your gaze shifts downward to see his coat now draped around your shoulders. when you look up, yunho is already adjusting his sleeves again, completely unfazed, like the gesture means nothing at all.ย
โso,โ he says casually, sitting down beside you on the staircase, spreading his legs slightly as he leans back on one hand, the other idly flipping his metal lighter open and closed, โgraduating soon, right? any plans career-wise?โ
it catches you off guard. you almost scoff, because wasnโt he the one who suggested this, the one who said you had a lot to say. the truth is, you donโt, at least not to him. now heโs the one guiding the conversation somewhereโฆ normal. like so normal that youโre not sitting next to your ex, who is actively messing with your head.
โiโm planning to try abroad.โ
โwhere?โ
โiโm not going to tell you,โ you glance at him, narrowing your eyes slightly. โdonโt want you suddenly becoming my coworker.โ
that earns a chuckle from him. โyou really think iโd follow you that far?โ
you donโt answer, because youโre not entirely sure he wouldnโt. he makes it very clear that he is not talking about your career. the silence settles again, but it doesnโt feel empty. it feels intentional, as if heโs waiting for the exact right moment to put the puzzle piece into place.
you shift slightly on the step, exhaling through your nose, trying to ignore how aware you are of him sitting so close beside you. the party noise is distant now, blurred into nothing. now itโs just the two of you, tucked away in a space that suddenly feels too smallโฆ then he speaks again.
โare you seeing someone right now?โ
your eyes flick to him immediately, but you donโt give him the satisfaction of a proper answer. โnone of your business.โ
no reaction at first, just the soft click of his lighter opening again. the small flame appears, disappears, and flickers back to life as he plays with it absentmindedly. itโs almost hypnotic, the rhythm of it: small flame, bigger flame, gone again. heโs buying time, or making you sit in discomfort a little longer than necessary. you stare at it longer than you should, trying to steady yourself. itโs stupid, but it gives your eyes somewhere else to go and your mind something else to focus on.
he exhales quietly, then the lighter closes with a soft snap, and he looks at you.
โjaemin, right?โ he says like heโs commenting on the weather. โhe seems like a nice guy, but doesnโt seem like your type.โ
everything in you stops, freezes like youโve just touched a block of ice. your entire body goes still for half a second too long andyour expression betrays you before you can even think to control it. itโs shock at first, then disbelief, because you never told him a name, or anything of the sort. never even showed signs of you being involved with someone else.
your mind starts racing immediately โ how does he know that? how long has he known? what else does he know?
only a few people know youโve been seeing jaemin, and yes, you do post stories with him just like you do with the other people you trust, people who wouldnโtโฆ your fingers tighten unconsciously around the fabric of his coat still resting on your shoulders.
โhow do you know that?โ your voice comes out lower than you intended. yunho tilts his head slightly, observing a reaction he already predicted, since just confirmed something he was quietly testing. a faint smirk pulls at his lips, he shrugs, leaning back on one hand as his gaze stays fixed on you.
โyouโre the campus's new hotshot couple,โ lies, obvious lies. you know it, he knows it, but the confidence in his voice makes it sound real. rumors, gossip, students talking, maybe someone exaggerating something they saw, but nothing that should have him perfectly informed with a name.
you donโt even realize your grip has tightened until the fabric of his coat shifts slightly under your fingers.
โrelax, iโm not interfering.โ but his tone says otherwise, โyou can date whoever you want.โ
you can't because you are mine.
yunho doesnโt move away while talking; he closes the distance slowly instead, testing exactly how far youโll let him go before you stop him. knee brushing yours, nudging you teasingly, he doesnโt break eye contact, and doesnโt give you space to believe or question anything. because the way he says it doesnโt sound like permission, it sounds like ownership heโs pretending not to enforce.
โyou lost the right to care about who i see a long time ago.โย
oh?ย
amused by how youโre trying so hard to stand your ground, trembling just beneath the surface. itโs beautiful like that, so unfiltered and honest. arenโt you the prettiest little angel when youโre angry? when youโre fighting him, resisting him, convincing yourself youโve moved on. itโs almost impressive, and adorable. your will is always too big for your own good, too loud to stay buried, always insisting things should go your way, even when reality bends differently once he is in the picture.
heโs memorizing it all over again with the way your breath changes when he gets too close, the way you refuse to look away even when it would be easier. your eyes are the most dangerous part of you, he decides. theyโre full of everything at once โ malice, frustration, sadness you pretend isnโt there, excitement you refuse to acknowledge. a fire that burns brighter than the weak flicker of the lighter between his fingers earlier. a fire that could bring him to his knees if he let it.
but he wonโt, he knows how to protect himself.
he knows you better than anyone else ever has. better than those two annoying best friends of yours, than jeongin, better than jaemin, even your parents. better than the version of yourself you try to present to the world.ย
yunho doesnโt need to chase because he knows your anger will bring you to him. he doesnโt need to beg, either. not when pulling the right strings of your nervous system is far more satisfying, watching you unravel and logic slipping away piece by piece until all thatโs left is emotion, exactly how he wants you. he doesnโt need you rational, he needs you emotional. to destabilize you until youโre reacting instead of analyzing, feeling instead of understanding, until youโre his again in everything but name.
your thoughts slow, your focus breaks, you start reacting instead of thinkingโฆ just like he planned.
itโs sudden when it happens, you grab his collar, and before he can even fully process it, you pull him in and kiss him. not what people would call romantic, itโs out of pure spite and the need to shut him up. itโs messy, all teeth and frustration and months of things left unsaid. itโs the words i hate you pressed into his mouth like a punishment.ย
yunho doesnโt take control immediately. he lets you bite his lip and put all that frustration finally into something tangible, lets you pretend this is just about physically shutting him up. yunho lets you have your moment of control, an illusion of victory, because he can feel youโre not over himโฆ should the fact that he isnโt over you either be good or bad news?
only then does he finally respond, when your breath catches in that familiar way, something in him snaps as he kisses you back. the taste is noticeably bitter, ashy, and slightly stale. a trace of smoke still clings to him, dry against your tongue with that faint chemical edge, following the chemical romance between you that has no clear answer or reaction to this day, only that it is intense.
his lips part slightly against yours, the movement slow, testing. he deepens the kiss, blurring the line between hesitation and intent, one hand sliding up to your neck, fingers resting there, guiding rather than forcing. he pulls you closer, and the way your breath stutters in the gorgeous column of your throat, the way your body reacts to his body without thinking, tells him everything he needs to know.
then, just as suddenly, he stops. not pulling away completely, neither of you really wants to break it, but heโs the one who finally pulls back first. youโre left staring at each other, chests inviting air in and out in hurried paces to catch your breaths.
โyou look at me like you hate meโฆโ and doesnโt seem like you want to stop, though. โbut you always looked at me like that.โ
thereโs something in his expression, satisfaction, like your reaction alone is enough. your breathing is uneven, lips slightly parted, and you hate how aware you are of him again: how close he is and how familiar it feels. your lipstick is slightly smudged, some of it transferred onto him, and the sight alone makes something twist in your stomach.
because you want more, but you donโt want to want him.
this is wrong on so many levels, kissing your ex out of nowhere, yet your body remembers him far too well, as it responds far too much. itโs frustrating, confusing, and addicting in a way you wish it wasnโt. what are you even supposed to do now?
โthis isnโt a good placeโฆโ he says after a moment, glancing briefly toward the direction of the party before looking back at you. โโฆunless you want an audience.โ
and suddenly it feels like the decision is yours, except it isnโt. because the way he looks at you says he already knows what youโll choose.
by the time you are fully recovered his hand is already around yours, fingers lacing, as his grip doesnโt loosen, not once, he already knows you wonโt pull away. he starts walking and youโre just following along without questioning it.
away from the crowd, into the quieter parts of the hotel, the lobby is nearly empty, the noise fading behind you as he moves straight for the elevators. he presses the button, and as if perfectly timed, the doors slide open to an empty cabin.
you step inside, and the moment the doors close behind you, the space feels smaller and tighter. mirrors line the walls, reflecting everything from every angle. no matter where you look, itโs him first and only then, you.
yunho and mirrors are a dangerous combination, because he doesnโt just want to feel you, he wants to watch you feel him and memorise the way you submit to his touch each and every time he manages to catch you. standing behind you, his taller frame hovering close, his chest warm against your back even if he doesnโt fully press himself in. still, if you lean back even slightly, he knows he has you.
his lips brush your shoulder, not quite a kiss, more like a promise of one. he makes you aware of everything โ your breathing, the expression on your pretty face, how close you really are to him. one hand slides low, brushing your thigh right where the hem of your dress ends, while the other rises to your face. his soft fingers tilt your chin upward. he doesnโt need to do much to make you go insane; his voice does most of the work, not his body.
โall that attitude, and look at you now,โ murmuring right next to your ear. the hand resting on your thigh doesnโt move further, and somehow you react more to what almost happens than to what actually does. as if hypnotized, trying to hold onto some sense of control, but itโs slipping fast, because your eyes betray you again. โis that really how someone looks when they want me gone?โ
he doesnโt think of himself as a freak about it. he just likes watching, prefers you vulnerable like this. his eyes never leave your reflection, taking in the way your lips part, your lashes flutter, the way you try to close your eyes against how overwhelming it feels.
โdonโt close your eyes, doll.โ his voice is low, slightly rougher, his fingers tightening just a little on your jaw. you forgot how much you loved being called that, and how much it didn't help your attempts at resistance. โi want you to see what iโm doing to you.โ
the hand on your leg slips beneath your dress until it finds the soft fabric of your panties, and youโre already so wet. his fingers press against you through the material, enough to make your breath hitch while moving in a slow and controlled rhythm as you squirm in result. your back arches finally pressing into him, and he exhales softly against your ear, completely obsessed with the sight of you falling apart in front of him.
โy-yunโโ his name halfway leaves your lips in a soft whine, breaking into something breathier when he moves just right. he loves the way you say his name like it belongs in your mouth, and believe it or not, itโs already tattooed on your skin with invisible ink.
โkeep looking.โ his thumb brushes over your bottom lip, guiding your attention back to the mirror. your thighs tremble, and your hands clutch at his forearm. the way your body reacts instantly, the way he has literal heart eyes when you make that sound again, his dick pulsating at the sight as he leans down slightly, lips grazing the shell of your ear. โsee how pretty you look like this?โ
you move without thinking, pressing back against him, your legs drawing closer together as if it might help, when his name slips from your lips again, your eyes glossy, barely staying open like he told you to, he smiles faintly against your skin.ย
โgood girl.โ but being good doesnโt mean you get everything. if anything, it means the opposite, because heโs making you want it first. you feel it before you can think about it. he could push you further, make you admit things, but he knows you wonโt, not yet.
a soft ding breaks through the moment. his gaze flicks up toward the numbers, 10th floor.ย
the doors are about to open, the risk of someone being there and catching youโฆ and just like that, he stops. he withdraws, leaving you aching, breath uneven, your body still caught in the aftermath of something unfinished. the doors slide open, and thankfully, no oneโs there. the hallway is empty; most guests are still downstairs celebrating, others are already asleep. not that he would care muchโฆ or maybe he would. yunho has never liked sharing or the idea of anyone else seeing what he considers his.
he reaches toward you again, and for a second you thinkโฆ but no. his hand slips into the coat youโre still wearing, pulling out the key card from the inner pocket.
โcome on, angelโฆ we donโt have all night.โ all night. you donโt even know what time it is. your purse is still downstairs, abandoned at the table with your parents, your phone out of reach, โneed help walking?โย
he asks, and that more than anything, pulls you back to reality. because when you glance at the mirror again, you finally see yourself properly. flushed and out of breath. your dress is slightly ridden up, your lips parted, your entire body still buzzing with heat that hasnโt gone anywhere. fuck. youโre left standing there, completely worked up, and heโs the only one who can do anything about it.
you know this is wrong, but your body isnโt listening. the empty hallway was your chance to leave, yet your feet never moved. you should have walked away, right then and thereโฆ so why didnโt you? zoning out and staring into the void of nothingness, thinking how no one can even compare and you hate that itโs still him who makes you lose your sanity. with yunho, it was never just attraction and maybe thatโs the problem. you hate him. you hate this. you hate that you donโt hate it enough.
telling yourself you still have a choice, only that you donโt. because somehow, without realizing it, youโre already following him to his room. the door closes behind you with a quiet click that feels louder than it should, and suddenly you donโt move.
you donโt sit. you just stand there, near the edge of the bed, fingers fidgeting with the ends of the sleeves, pulling the fabric over your hands as if it might calm you somehow. your breathing still hasnโt settled, your body is still carrying everything from moments ago.
he moves further into the room as if you being here is expected and inevitable. his hand reaches up to his collar, his eyes donโt leave you, though, not once. fingers hooking under the knot of his tie, loosening it slowly, sliding it from around his neck, the fabric slipping through his fingers before he lets it hang loosely in his hand. he stands there too, looking at your posture, and the way you havenโt dared to sit or do anything at all.
his lips twitch slightly when your fingers pause for half a second, then continue. you donโt dare to talk, you donโt trust your voice right now. he takes a step closer, then another, slowly closing the space between you until it feels suffocating again, and youโre aware of him in the same way you were in the elevator.
โtake a seat,โ he says softly, โyou donโt have to stand there like that,โ and you obey.ย
you sit right at the edge of the bed, back straight, still clutching the sleeves, as yunho watches you for a moment longer. then, without breaking eye contact, he lowers himself not onto the bed, but down, kneeling in front of you.
it shouldnโt feel the way it does, as if he were praying to his goddess for a blessing of a lifetime. it should be unsettling, he chose this position for a reason; he wants to be right here, close enough to see every reaction you try to hide. his hands rest lightly against your legs at first, thumbs caressing the flesh as you tense, but donโt pull away.ย
โdo you knowโฆโ fingers sliding slightly higher, tracing and craving, then thereโs a pause. โhow hard it was not to think about you?โ not crossing any line too fast, he continued, eyes fixed on your face, โto see you every week, and pretend we are just strangers?โ
his razor sharp gaze softens for what you can barely count a millisecond, before it shifts back to its sinister depths, something that looks a little too close to obsession.
โshould i? or are you going to pretend you donโt want this?โ
beneath the dress, fingers slipping under the fabric as he hooks into your waistband and starts to pull it down. you are leaning in just slightly, giving him the access heโs already taken. thatโs all the permission he needs. the delicate lace follows, sliding down until it pools at your feet, as you gently kick them fully aside with the help of your heels.
"last chance to leave, angel... say or do something if you want me to stop.โ
holding himself back, and itโs taking more effort than he wants to admit. his gaze drags over you, taking in every detail like heโs been starved of it.
you look the same. no, you like you never left him at all.
his jaw tightens faintly because god, he missed you. no matter how much time passed or how many distractions he surrounded himself with, nothing and no one helped. they didnโt look right or feel right, they simply werenโt you.
you changed, of course you did. your hair, your style, the perfume, even the way you carry yourself now, like youโve grown into something that bites back.
but he sees through it: you are just a little sheep wearing the wolfโs head.
and he is the wolf wearing a sheepโs clothing.
something restless stirring beneath his skin, the way it creeps in, settles deep, refuses to leave. heโs been stuck on a feeling, just can't stop, once ain't enough.
his thumb presses just a little firmer, grounding himself, because he might actually lose that thin thread of control heโs still pretending to have.
โi hate you.โ you say but your legs part for him. his head tilts at that, tongue pressing into his cheek, amused, your defiance only entertains him more. donโt mind him then, as he eases you back, gaze heavy on you, his hands slide firmly to your thighs, guiding you then lifting your legs to settle over his shoulders.ย
he looks at you like heโs about to show you what heaven feels like when its most precious and divine being finally falls from grace.
yunho loves teasing you with his words almost as much as he loves tasting you. his tongue dives in, relentless at first, exploring every twitching nerve that seems to remember him all to well, then deeper, faster and harder. he pushes in and out like heโs trying to swallow you whole, sliding in and out with perfect rhythm.
โbabydoll, youโre so sweet,โ he groans, licking and sucking, eyes rolling back when he finally tastes you. you're addicting. he laps up your juices, swirling his tongue on your clit. โdid you save all this for me?โ
his hands grip your thighs, holding you open, pressing you closer as he devours you like a meal he canโt get enough of. every moan, quiet or loud, drives him further to the sinful gates of temptation. he buries his face in you, lips and tongue hungry, mouth wet, making sure every inch of you is tasted.
โlook at you, trembling for meโฆโ he whispers, nibbling at your inner thigh between laps of your cunt. heโs relentless with the words, praising every tiny quiver, โthatโs it, youโre such a good girl, letting me do this.โ
god, your pussyโs perfect. canโt believe this is all his to play with after a whole year of craving you. the way he grins while teasing you, making you feel like youโre both the most desirable and most obedient thing in the world.ย
โyou like it when i talk to you like this, hm? gonna make you scream my name before i even touch you properly,โ he teases, tongue pushing deeper, fingers brushing where you couldn't even reach. every compliment and filthy line makes your body shake more, your pussy grip tighter around nothing, dripping just from his mouth and words.
he mixes praise and filth, so youโre caught between feeling worshiped and utterly used. the combination makes you desperate and completely under his control. by the time he lifts his head, cheeks wet, lips shiny with your slick, because he knows exactly what heโs done to you โ and he isnโt done yet.
โmmhโฆ yunhoโโ your back arches, hips rising to meet him despite yourself. youโre dripping, trembling, completely lost to the sloppy sounds of his tongue. he groans, deep in his throat, enjoying the taste of you. he doesnโt rush when he devours and dominates your senses. โfuck, you are soโฆ hahhโโ
your legs are clamping around his head as your hands tug his hair, gosh itโs still so soft to the touch. your chest heaving, voice hoarse from moaning, and yunho finally lifts his head, grinning at the mess he made glistening on his lips. wiping his mouth slowly, chuckling, because heโs left you begging without even doing too much.
โmmhm,โ diving back in as his fingers brushing against your clit while his tongue plunges deeper. he just keeps going โ tongue flicking, fingers circling, whispering filthy praises with every movement. โthatโs it, thatโs my good girlโฆ come on, let it all out for me.โ
your walls clench and your pussy gushes over his tongue, spurting uncontrollably as your legs tremble and your back arches off the surface. yunho groans, licking up every drop, smiling like the maniac he is, โgod, youโre insaneโฆ look at you squirting for me.โ
he doesnโt stop, still moving, coaxing out every last drop, praising you with every breath he takes. his thoughts are full of you, and soon enough, you will be full of him. โmine, you are only mineโฆ keep coming for me, angel.โ
youโve never felt so ruined and so completely at his mercy.
โi should leave you like this,โ he adds, quieter, more to himself than to you. the idea actually tempts him, letting you feel exactly how easy it is for him to get you like this. โsend you back downstairs all pretty, like nothing happenedโฆโ a soft exhale followed, โ...but you wouldnโt make it far.โ
pulling back, but his fingers keep toying with your clit, and youโre already so sensitive from that alone. he talks dirty in that manic and possessive way of his, murmuring about how heโll keep you in the dress and the heels, since you canโt spend the night with himโฆ no matter how much he wants you to.
he eases your legs off his shoulders, standing up with a slow stretch, but before he can even undress, he steps back in between your shaky legs, looking down at you with that same secretive, almost warm smile. maybe itโs love, maybe itโs lust, if not both. his index finger and thumb catch your chin, tilting your face up so you have no choice but to look at him, especially when you were trying so hard not to. how cute.
โdrop the act, dollface,โ he growled, his fingers slide down, big palm spreading around your throat, squeezing to cut off that long-awaited breath you wanted to take, watching you closely, eyes fixed on your lips as they start to quiver with every subtle tightening of his grip. โor do i need to remind you who you belong to?โ
one moment heโs choking you, the next, heโs already stripped from the waist down, preparing you to take him.
lying on your back on the bed, with him hovering above you, one long finger slides inside you, immediately feeling how tight and slick you are as he starts to move. he watches closely, eyes fixed on the way your face twists with undeniable pleasure, all while his own cock pulses hot against your leg. a second finger slips in beside the first, and you feel the stretch right away. your walls clenching around him, creaming over his knuckles as small, broken sounds leave your throat, half cough, half whine, still trying to catch the breath he stole from you.
โthere it isโฆ i was waiting for that.โ and by that, he means you being ready to take him. his thumb drags over the tip of his throbbing cock, stroking himself a few slow times, and your gaze drops โ was he always this big? youโre not even sure how youโre supposed to take itโฆ how you managed before. heโs thick, lining up at your soaked entrance, pushing your walls to their limit before heโs even halfway in, your cunt already molding around his size.
missionary is always a gamble with him, because you never know which version youโre going to get: the gentle one, the mean one, the jealous oneโฆ there are options, but youโre never the one choosing. this time, he is a meanie. a creature of extreme sadism.
all you can do beneath him is squirm and cry, clinging helplessly to every inch of him he gives you, heavy as he presses in, hitting places your own fingers could never reach. he grunts softly, hips pulling back again because youโre still not full of him, not yet. he has to carve the shape of himself into your insides, and claim you properly, like he always will.
maybe youโre already close, just from the way he moves. shallow at first, his pelvis dragging sinfully against you, making your writhing body jolt upwards on the bed. he switches between soft and controlled thrusts to slow and grinding circles, anything to ease you and help your body relax, make you greedy enough to take him deeper.
โis that all you do, cry?โ yunho hisses under his breath, lips brushing wet against your ear as your nails dig into his shoulders. his cock presses right against your most sensitive spot, pulling a loud moan from you, and you think itโs too deep already, when he is not even that deep. โbabydoll, be a good girl for me and take every inch, yeah? no, donโt cry nowโฆ you can handle it, because youโre mineโฆ my pretty girl.โ
your eyes sting, tears slipping free, smudging your makeup a bit. itโs been so long since you had any sexual intercourse, a whole year. you didnโt even do anything more than a few careless kisses and make out sessions with jaemin, nothing that even comes close to tonightโs carnal ravaging.
you need yunho. not just inside you, you need him under your skin, running through your dna. you hate his guts, you do, but god, he fucks you so well you can feel him in your guts.
the tears fall, catching the light like silver, as if tiny diamonds slip down your cheeks as he stretches you open again.
his fingers lace with yours, pinning your hands against the mattress as he hisses filthy praises into your ear. your sensitive cunt takes every devastating thrust, each one pulling out those wet and sloppy sounds, the kind that make you want to scream again and again until your vocal cords tear apart and you lose your voice for days as a reminder of what yunho is doing to do you. what he will always do to you. the way his cock drives fully into you sends that overwhelming urge through your quivering body, threatening to make you come undone, youโre not even sure if you want to. itโs a sensation so intense, such painfully good pressure building with nowhere to go.
youโre so cockdrunk itโs insane. you always thought you were in control, always told yourself he wasnโt a good person, but the dick was too good to let go. he fits too perfectly, like he was made just for you.
โscream for me, doll,โ he groans, that husky tone rolling off his tongue and straight through you, pulling a helpless whimper from your lips. his brown eyes flick over your face, taking in every desperate expression like heโs committing it to memory, because watching you fall apart is his favorite part. his pre-cum leaves a messy ring at the base of his cock, trailing down the inside of your thighs, and maybe if he werenโt so consumed by you, heโd comment on just how desperate you look.
โyu-yunhoโ!โ his name tears from your throat as it echoes through the room. his hips snap into yours without mercy, hard enough to leave bruises. your back lifts off the bed, arching into the overwhelming rush flooding your body. you praise and beg for him, pushing him further into ecstasy as he presses you back down every time you move too much.
โyou think anyone else could handle you like this?โ yunho coos, his pace picking up, thrusts growing faster and faster, until your thighs start to numb. โthink anyone could love you the way i do?โ
โyunho, pleaseโฆ ahhโโ you hear yourself, like youโre outside your own body and have lost control of even your own voice. all you can feel is your nails digging into his back, your body tightening around him as you suddenly break, soaking him, your release spilling over his cock. and still his eyes stay on you, he adores your face more than anything else. itโs almost as if your reactions to the pleasure only he can give you appeal more to him than the sex itself.
โyou say you hate me, but i bet you were just mad at me, yeah?โ
but youโre too stubborn to admit that, refusing to give him even that much satisfaction. you close your eyes, trying to reclaim some dominance over him, but he only chuckles, bringing his hips to a stop at the fading edge of his own release.
thatโs what makes your eyes snap open, staring up at him. โwhyโd youโ?โ
โi asked you a question, angel,โ he sneers. one hand drifts down to your clit, rubbing slow, agonizing circles that pull a helpless whine from your throat, your head tosses back.
โp-please, yuโ i canโt, iโโ but your legs stay wrapped tight around his waist, pulling him closer, deeper, your heels pressing cold against the heat of his body.
his other hand moves, this time settling around your throat. at first, itโs loose, enough pressure to make you notice. then it tightens as he watches everything: from the way your lips part, to how your chest struggles to rise. completely focused on how dependent you become on him for air. forcing eye contact, watching you go from stubborn to needy, leaning in close to whisper instead of raising his voice.ย
โtell me if itโs too muchโฆ go on.โ with every small twitch or squirm, it only makes his grip tighten more, restricting your breathing while muttering praise after praise. what a fucking sadistic psychopath. โso pretty like thisโฆcan barely breathe and still taking me so well.โ
pushing your limits on purpose, to remind you exactly whoโs in control. he feels the way you start to struggle, your body begins to give, and only then does his grip loosen.
air rushes back into your lungs all at once, burning on the way in. your chest stutters, breaths coming out broken and uneven instead of steady. your vision blurs, tears slipping freely now, and you donโt even realize youโre shaking until he notices it first. his hand doesnโt leave your throat. it stays there, fingers still curved around it, no longer squeezing, just resting.
โthere you go, babydoll,โ his voice drops, softer now, but no less heavy. โbreathe.โ
but heโs watching you too closely for it to feel like kindness. his thumb drags slowly over the spot he pressed into, feeling the rapid flutter of your pulse beneath his touch. your lips part, pulling in air that still doesnโt feel like enough, as another broken sound slips out of you.
it does something to him. you like this, glassy-eyed and trembling, wants him to hold onto this exact version of you for as long as he can. then, without warning, he leans in. his lips press against yours. itโs not an apology, far from it. a kiss that lingers just long enough to steal the breath you just fought to get back, a quiet reminder of how easily he can take it and when he pulls away, thereโs the faintest hint of a smile, because heโd do it again.
โshh, donโt cryโฆ you know i take care of whatโs mine.โ still too dizzy to think about anything but breathing and kissing, your legs are thrown over his broad shoulders, his hands pushing them closer to your head to get the angle just right. he watches himself slide between your folds, then looks down at you like heโs never seen anything more beautiful.
you glance down to where your bodies meet, even if every instinct tells you to pull away, but thereโs nowhere to go. every movement hits heavier, deeper; your body canโt tell the difference between pleasure and pressure anymore. he drags himself all the way out at a torturously slow pace, only to push back in just as cruelly.
"s-shitโฆ donโt move,โ he groans, thrusting into you, when he finally decides to snap his hips, his pelvis pressed against yours. his fingers find your sensitive clit again, rubbing it fast to get you to cum again, throwing his head back as he thrusts one last time, before shooting his load into your aching cunt. spurts of warm cum fill your insides while you wither beneath him, all hot and sweaty, not even processing the mess both of you made under the clean bedsheets.
his cock was pulsing so hard you could feel it bulging through your tummy, filling you to the brim as you milk him dry. his palm presses flat against your lower stomach, and he actually smirks when he feels and sees the faint movement beneath, occasionally shifting his hand lower or higher just to make you lose focus mid-thought.
โyou fell that, doll?โ
do you feel how deep my love runs for you?
yunho looks at you like heโs completely gone, someone who operates on obsession, trying to imprint himself into every part of you, leave something behind that no one else could ever do. heโs smug about it too, of course he is. he just won in life, like out of everything in the world, he got you. fuck, wishing he had his camera right now, just to capture this exact moment. you look unreal beneath him, divine even dressed in black, an angel dragged down just for him.
his voice softens, murmuring sweet nothings under his breath as he leans in, pressing slow kisses to your cheeks, your temple, the bridge of your nose. gentler now, calming you down after everything he just put you through. a quick peck lands on your lips, lingering just a little longer than it needs to.
finally, yunho pulls out, watching closely as a small trace of him drips from you. his fingers follow immediately, sinking to keep it all in. then he pulls you up, arms wrapping around you, holding you tight against his chest, lips pressing into your hair, breathing you in like he doesnโt get enough of you, even now.
the aftercare is minimal, because it has to be. he lets you rest for a few minutes, helps you steady yourself, maybe guides you to the bathroom, helps you fix your clothes and makeup, and put your panties back on, while he dresses himself again as if nothing happened. and only now, that youโre about to leave, does he decide to act sweet.ย
โyou good, need anything else?โ
โiโll manage, thank you very much, asshole.โ
you smile through your teeth, already turning, only to wobble slightly in your heels. gee, wonder why, like you just didn't have some mindblowing sex. making your way out, youโre glowing, thereโs no other word for it. a little wrecked, sure, a little unsteady, but shining brighter than the stars in the sky.ย
he doesnโt close the door right away, waits until you step into the elevator, as the doors slide shut and youโre out of sight. only then does he finally close it, the click echoing a little too loud in the empty room. he leans back for a second, alone with himself, because yeah, heโs an asshole, he knows that.
but youโll always come back to him, and heโll always come back to you.
having big gaps between classes was something you enjoyed, but sometimes hated. just like you hate everything about him. from the smug smirk that pulls at the corner of his mouth to how his fingers are inside your mouth, making you gag and be disgusted by the way he does such things like he owns you โ he doesnโt.
heโs your ex, the one youโve tried so hard to forget: the sound of his voice, the way he felt under your skin. now his lips are back on your neck, sucking, kissing, leaving marks youโll have to cover the second you walk out of his office once heโs done fucking you on his desk. you feel his thumb press against your throat, taking his time, teasing you in ways you swore you would never let him do that again, claiming you like he never left.
trying to tell him, no but your body keeps telling him yes.
you should be disappointed in yourself, letting him pull you off track like this, letting him take control when you know better. yet, with every touch and mark sends heat racing through you, clouding your mind until you can barely remember why you hate him so much. is it because he wasnโt who you thought he wasโฆ or because you still feel something for him? hating him is easier than admitting you never stopped wanting him.ย
you donโt want to care; you want to despise him for what he did and for who he is. but thatโs slipping away when your legs wrap around his waist, pulling him closer, eyes roll back when he slides inside of you, filling you completely, making you forget everything else. you want to resist, hold onto the anger, but you canโt. not when heโs deep inside, hitting all the spots that make you arch and gasp, his name falls from your lips even when you swore youโd never let it happen again.ย
โy-yunho... faster!โ you choke out, hands clawing at his back, desperate and needy, but of course, he doesnโt give in that easily. yunho only slows down, teasing you, lips curling into that infuriating grin against your skin.ย
โangel, i told you to be quiet, didnโt i?โ he murmurs, voice low and slightly mocking, โso impatient, as always. good things come when you obeyโฆ and wait.โย
you are tired of waiting and being toyed with, and if heโs going to take his sweet time, then youโll make sure he regrets it. your nails dig into his shoulders, even through his shirt, hard enough to strain the fabric and leave marks far more lasting than the lipstick stain on that secret polaroid sitting on his nightstand.ย
"stop being such a dick and fuck me already!" you hate him, you repeat it to yourself over and over, until his breath is hot against your neck and his hands are gripping your hips as if heโll never let go.
and just like that, he snaps, relentless now, giving you exactly what you begged for.
his pace quickens, the plastic creaks underneath, each thrust pushing you closer to that edge, all you can think about is him, all you can feel is him. the hate melts away, replaced by a pleasure so overwhelming it almost hurts. you are so full, burning hot by how he uses your body as a canvas to paint you all white with no drops going to waste. purity and innocence, those words donโt exist for you anymore, as they are replaced with sin and punishment.
โthatโs it, pretty. feels good, yeah?โ he knows exactly how the two of you collide, like youโre at war with each other. itโs rough, as it drags your pride and self-respect straight through the dirt. the relationship is so damn dysfunctional, but yunho knows you better than anyone else. you donโt even realize how much he thrives on this, how easily you let him take control. he loves you like this: soft and bratty, vulnerable and entirely his.ย
you hope, no, you pray, that the good thing he promised finally comes, because you canโt take much more of this. when it hits, it crashes through you at the same time as him, your cries muffled against his shoulder, your chest rising and falling as all that tension finally spills out. he will take care of you, he will always look out for you because you are his most adored and precious doll, his favorite thing to hold and ruin.
a few minutes later, after heโs helped clean you up with a towel from one of the cabinets he keeps just for these getaways. you zip your pants back up, still feeling the lingering warmth between your thighs. you just hope your panties are enough to keep things from showing through. shitโฆ you shouldโve worn the black jeans.
โi only came here to give you mine and jeonginโs project, not to get creampied.โ
โbaby, you know you donโt have to do anything,โ he says, spinning lazily in his chair. one hand clicks the mouse as he scrolls through whatever just came into his email. โyouโre my favorite student, you pass without lifting a finger. your friend, on the other handโฆ needs to learn how to use photoshop.โ
โyeah, butโฆโ
โbut what?โ he glances up at you from the computer, that same knowing look settling back in. โyou missed me?โ
ah, your eyes betray you again. you missed him, no matter how much your ego tries to argue otherwise. after what happened at the hotel two months agoโฆ yeah, that was all it took for both of you to realize you canโt stay away from each other. and maybe youโll regret it one day, but not now. youโve already decided to keep it hidden from karina and yeji. as for jaeminโฆ yeah, heโs nice. heโs always been, but thatโs all he is now, nice. you made sure you stayed friends, nothing more, and nothing less.
so you leave yunhoโs office, of course not before kissing him goodbye, not that it matters much when heโll be at your place later anyway. โdonโt forget weโre watching spiderman~โ like you could forget, you know the entire plot by heart at this point.
youโre wearing a sweater thatโs way too big for you, one you casually told your friends you found at a thrift store. sure, if that store was called yunhoโs apartment. thankfully, no one suspects a thing, not even your two best friends, because if they didโฆ it would be over, and youโre not ready to lose them, but the heart wants what it wants.
later, you meet jeongin at the campus cafรฉ, sitting across from him like you didnโt just leave your professorโs office in a completely different state than you entered it.
โinnie, thank you for ordering for me too.โ you smile, taking a sip of your drink, lookingโฆ brighter than usual, too happy for someone with a four-hour gap between classes.ย
โyeah, no problem,โ he says, watching you for a second longer than usual. โalso, are youโฆ okay? i donโt know, you just seem different lately after things ended with jaemin.โ
you blink, caught off guard. โhuh, am i?โ a small shrug follows. โi donโt knowโฆ i guess i just decided to focus on myself for a while, not on men.โ
โwellโฆ whatever it is, it suits you,โ he mutters, still a little unsure. โohโ by the way, what did professor jeong say about the project?โ
โhe said weโve got max points secured,โ you shrug lightly. โand that youโve improved your photoshop skills.โ
โreally?โ jeongin perks up, grinning. โwell, donโt mind me if i skip next week then.โ
the first part is true, the second isnโt. you can lie to everyone else, but not to yunho. itโs harmless. not everyone needs to know everything about you, not even the people closest to you. so here you are back with your toxic ex, because being stuck on a feeling means being stuck on him. if anyone found out, theyโd probably kill him firstโฆ and then you.
he knows exactly what you risk every time you come back to him. this was never a temporary game, something that could end just because you decided it should. to him, itโs an inevitable cycle. he doesnโt see himself as someone you return to; in his mind, you never truly left in the first place.
he would give you everything without hesitation. tear the world apart for you, piece by piece, if thatโs what it takes to keep you where he wants. but he would ruin you just as easily, because to him, being broken by his hands is still better than letting anyone else touch what he was already his.
yunho is a monster creeping in your heart. a wolf in sheepโs clothing, the kind of character no one expects to be the villain. he isnโt some bad habit; he is an addiction with no cure, letting him consume you, until thereโs barely a line left between where you end and he begins. you chose to stay, considering no one plays the role better than you do. this version of yourself that looks put together, untouchable, and guardedโฆ while slowly giving everything away to the one person who knows exactly how to take it.
you didnโt fall for a good man โ you fell for the one who learned how to look like one. you keep calling it love, even when itโs nowhere close, because you canโt tell the difference anymore. and if this is what love is supposed to feel likeโฆ you donโt want to be saved from it.
ยฉ KISSSAN do not copy, repost or modify my work.
thank you phoebe ( @tinyfixon ) for doing a beta read and being an amazing editor! i love you so much and i hope mingi is going to propose to you soon <3
he was the only older guy you had ever dated, and you swore you would never do this to yourself again. two years of love, obsession, and control are gone, or at least, thatโs what you thought.
some people donโt let go or move on โ he never did. so why does he walk back into your life like nothing ever happened... this time, as your professor?
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( ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ) ๐๐๐ป๐ต๐ผ ๐ ๐ณ๐ฒ๐บ!๐ฟ๐ฒ๐ฎ๐ฑ๐ฒ๐ฟ. ๐ฃฒโ sfw +++ suggestive. he holds onto stolen moments with you like a fantasy, one he dreams of turning real, without having to hide you from the world.
water, earth, fire, and airโฆ long ago, the four nations lived together in harmony. then, everything changed when the fire nation attacked. only the avatar, master of all four elements, could stop them, but when the world needed him most, he vanished. a hundred years passed when you and your brother discovered the new avatar, an airbender named san. even though his airbending skills are great, he has a lot to learn before he's ready to save anyone, but you believe san can save the world.
what he canโt save you from, what no one actually can, is the future fire lord โ YUNHO, who always finds his way back to you in secret, of course. he canโt afford to be discovered in enemy territory. if anyone found out the crown prince was hiding among them, it wouldnโt end well for anyone. unlike the man heโs meant to become, he will never be like his father. heโs too soft for that, dangerous in other ways. yunho is easy smiles, blissful laughter, and a teasing streak that drives you insane.
you werenโt supposed to sneak away tonight. a secluded back street, tucked behind the noise of a bustling city at night. leaving quietly, unnoticed by your brother and the avatar, just for a few minutes with the man whoโs come to mean far too much. your back presses against the wall, his hand braced beside your head as he leans in. thereโs light spilling from nearby lanterns, but nothing shines brighter than the fire in his eyes: that spark that was meant for warmth, not destruction.
โi missed you, yโknowโฆโ he murmurs, gaze flickering from your eyes to your lips, then back again. the first rule yunho ever learned was that fire consumed, the second was that it obeyed. so why every time he touched you did it feel like he was the one being burned? โbut you always slip through my fingers, hm?โ
his hand comes up to your face, large and gentle as it cups your cheek. it was so warm, in contrast to your colder skin, making you melt into his touch. you missed him more than you should, as your own hand rises a little hesitantly, before pressing against his chest, right over his heart. itโs racing abruptly, his fire flickers because thatโs the only thing heโs never been able to control, not around you at least, when it comes to feeling things rather deeply.
โyunhoโฆโ is all you manage, the warning weak even to your own ears. you canโt stay long, both of you know that. if your brother or the avatar notices your absence, they canโt risk losing you, but yunho would risk everything for you, for one kiss or one more day watching you from across the tea shop. one more night where youโre not just a dream he canโt hold onto.
โwhat?โ he tilts his head, lips hovering slowly over yours, close enough that you can feel his breath. you shouldnโt even be here at all, but as his thumb brushes your lower lip, you're barely finding a reason why you cannot stay. โyouโre the one who came to me.โ
his smile is brief, almost triumphant, when he closes the distance.
itโs not gentle, it starts slow, heโs savoring it, like heโs been starving and doesnโt want to rush the first taste, but it deepens quickly, heat building between you. your fingers curl into his clothes, pulling him closer, while his hand slides from your cheek to your waist, holding you tight.
your elements clash and blend all at once โ fire against water, roughness against softness. you kiss him like the world isnโt waiting to tear you apart, and when he finally gives in, the teasing falls away. your fingers curl into his collar, tugging him down as your lips part, and the kiss shifts from soft to hungry, slow turns to lingering. your breaths mix, your movements syncing, tongues brushing in a rhythm that feels like you are close to losing control.
a quiet sound escapes you, and yunho loves it. you can feel it in the way he deepens the kiss, the way he tilts your head just right, and how he gives you everything all at once after making you wait for it. his fire flares, heat blooming between you as if even his bending canโt stay out of this. your fingers brush his jaw, his neck, grounding yourself in him before you drown completely.
eventually, breathing becomes a problem, and so he pulls back, but his lips still brush yours, unwilling to let go completely.
โsee?โ he murmurs, teasing you before he steals one last quick kiss. โworth the risk.โ
you hug him, head pressing against his chest, letting the sound of his heartbeat calm you down. you should leave, but your hands tighten their grip instead. his arms wrap around you fully, pulling you closer until thereโs no space left to doubt anything at all.
โjust one more minute,โ you whisper, like you donโt already know he would give you eternity if you asked softly enough. and yunho holds you tighter, as if one night more in your arms is the only peace heโs ever needed. you are still his secret, a fantasy made real in stolen hours. he should tell the world, and risk it all, take you by his side, where no one could hide you from him again, but that would mean burning everything down.
for now, he chooses this instead, because when it comes to you, itโs all or nothing.
SAN gets off the thought of his pretty and sweet girlfriend being fucked and ruined by his best friend, WOOYOUNG.
hiding from you in the bathroom, when it's the middle of the night, while you are sleeping under his covers. you don't know that he jerks off more often now, because fuck, he can't stop imagining it. diamond-like tears in your eyes, spilling down on your soft cheeks, as his best friend takes control over your body.
san knows exactly how wooyoung'd tease you, how heโd push your buttons, and pull reactions out of you that your boyfriend himself can't... gosh, the idea of you coming apart under someone elseโs hands makes something twist in his chest.
images clear as day flash of you being fucked dumb, and crying out two names, when you are being devilishly stretched out for the very first time by another man's cock. while san's going to be fisting his, watching, helpless and aroused all at once, torn between wanting to stop it and wanting to join.
thinking about you being stuffed full of his best friend's cum, and before he knows it, your boyfriend cums in his hand, white drops falling on the floor. heart racing like it's going to run away on its own, breathing heavily, and itโs not even the act itself that gets him โ itโs you.
because when he crawls back into bed beside you, all clean, slipping an arm around your waist and pressing his face into your hair, he looks like the kind of man anyone would trust without question. but beneath that softness is a mind that doesnโt rest, having fantasies he locks away behind sweet smiles and soft touches.
kissing your shoulder as if he isnโt hiding a thousand twisted thoughts behind closed eyes, as if perfection hasnโt learned how to wear love like a mask. san wonders how long he can resist sending wooyoung a risky text to come over tonight.
your husband, YUNHO, pouted as you placed your son in his lap, because for some reason the little bundle of joy always cries when he is in his fatherโs arms, while you are somewhere else for not even five minutesโฆ mama canโt even go to the bathroom if the baby is not attached to her hip.
โhoney, no,โ you smile, sitting next to him and putting your head on his shoulder while you gently tickle your sonโs tummy, โhe loves you, okay? heโs justโฆ attached to me right now.โ the baby immediately curls into your side, gripping your sleeve, wanting to pull you closer or for you to cuddle him instead of this grown unknown man that looks like a giant tree from one of the cartoons that plays on the tv.
โattached is an understatement.โ
โheโll grow out of it.โ you kiss yuhnoโs cheek, nuzzling more into his warmth when the pure possessive rage hits your son when you kiss his dad, seeing how you give your attention to someone else and squawks, like a warning shot. the baby language is all about doing faces and just mouthing things, little pop-pop sounds that come out of him, as yunho understands one thing that is: stay away from mama.
yunho groans, bouncing him lightly. โthatโs actually insaneโฆ where does he get that possessiveness from?โ
you stare at yunho, raising your eyebrow, and he looks at you, blinking, then his ears turn bright red from embarrassment, because hmm, you wonder from where and from who your son got so much personality even if he hasnโt learned to talk yet?
โokay fine, maybe from me.โ
but at one point, you just wanted to go to the kitchen for a bit and got up when both boysโ puppy eyes shot at you the second you took one step toward leaving. because what do you mean you are leaving them to attend the human needs to hydrate your body, and maybe grab something to eat... how can you leave them alone? this is not good parenting behaviour, you shouldn't leave your children unattended since your husband is a man-child.
โwhere are you going?โ
โto get water?โ
โokay, butโฆ are you coming back?โ
โyunho, the kitchen is five meters away.โ
โyeah, but still...โ
in the meantime, your son giggles, arms wrapping around his dadโs neck, squealing every time yunho spins him in the air. the dadโs face is just as bright, cheeks hurting from grinning, whispering baby gibberish, and when you come back, he lights up like a dog whose owner just returned from a two-month trip.
โthere she is,โ he murmurs proudly, cooing softly at his son, holding him high like heโs a giggling basketball. โmy beautiful wife and your mother, the love of my lifeโฆ ow, little man, donโt grip my finger that tightโโ
your son literally beams at you, same puppy eyes, arms out, tiny hands clutching air like yeah, give me to mama. the sunshine is only ten months old, but grows more attached every day, and more clingy to the woman he considers the centre of his tiny universe. and when he looks at his dad, his mouth is a tiny pout, looking so done with yunho.
the baby melts against you, tiny yawns sneaking in as he drifts toward sleep in your arms, and your husband justโฆ watches. heart practically exploding, because even if the little sunshine clearly has you wrapped around his chubby finger, he knows that deep down, he loves him too, it's justโฆ he loves you more, and honestly, yunho canโt even be mad about it, as he leans down to kiss the top of his son's head, "sweet dreams, baby."