i feel safe in the 5am light

i know the lyrics to every bastille song fight me abt it

[mothermara]

remember to bury the dead with a phone, everyone. these days the ferry terminal at the river styx wants you to download a fucking app

[cydie]

that was messed up

and iliya's reaction broke me the most actually

[cydie]

there's no doubting that we care about each other as people first. brother or lover aside

i think we'll always have something that only we know

and it's just a large bank of heartache

[cydie]

can't explain the way i feel about you

like

we were connected in another life

like

is this what real unexplainable chemistry feels like?

like

we're not meant to be in this life. we met in the wrong timeline

like

I know you're not for me, but i feel something there that makes me so sad

like

we helped each other in this life in ways the other doesn't realise

but we both know that we are not meant to be each other's endgame

and our friendship remains something strangely poignant and familiar

like we understand each other

the individual connections i share with people are so so unique

this one just makes me so sad

yet i cannot quite pinpoint why

happy when we're together but

something tugs at my heart when i spend time alone with you

a sadness somehow

we talk sometimes. rarely, but sometimes

we just have a special link, complicated

[cydie]

holy shit

thinking about being in a relationship where im unhappy and married with children is TERRIFYING

the amount the woman loses when giving her youth and her body

i need to be with a man who can handle me when im scared

[cydie]

NAHHH NO WAY MARIUS AND Q GET TOGETHER BC MARIUS WAS SO WRONG FOR WHAT HE DID

[fairycosmos]

girl help i'm turning 30 in a few days and i've done fuck all with my life

fuck all is a classic 30 year old thing to do. youre right on track

[cydie]

nah minho was so wrong for that cos Marius LITERALLY was fucking with them

like

nah ofc she's gonna freak out

[thistoowillpasss]

[thistoowillpasss]

[thistoowillpasss]

[thistoowillpasss]

[kittykittyredcat]

[despazito]

It's actually super unethical to keep a peeve as a pet

[cydie]

sobbed for the last few hours because i just

i don't even know how to put it into words

no i don't feel bad for not being more capable

but I do feel bad for not being able to do more for my mother

which is why im getting a licence

and why im trying to build

and I mean

i just don't see how feasible it would be to live together

considering how when you live with someone you do lose a level of autonomy

idk how else to make it all work

i just

wish i could do more

[cydie]

11:30am wake up - dream man

dreamt about my dream man and then he was also previously married and I think had a kid or no he wouldn't

but he took care of me, he put me on his amex, he had an apartment in this speakeasy type restaurant , he was sure of himself and kept me stable. i could literally just give up operating and he'd be able to keep me alive

omfg wtf

[cydie]

cannot describe the immense guilt i feel towards my parents for many many reasons

geum myeong's emotions towards her parents that entire show was just

it hit a place i didnt realise a show would be able to hit

[cydie]

honestly this has gone on long enough

if he wants to be friends it will have to come from him being a mature person

if I stay in this stalemate of a situation for much longer, we have to start calling it self harm

you cannot force somebody to meet you where you are

and that goes both ways bc I would rather address this and move on

unfortunately I cannot meet him where he is

so if naturally our paths diverge, I wish you all the best always bc I will always have love for all the people in my life past and present xx

[cydie]

the cs6 adobe suite is a 600 dollar license as of may 2026. i can create and generate to endless bounds, this program is infinitely talented.

yet i'm stuck trying to figure out how to crop my fucking vector

[cydie]

is this Apothecary Diaries

[cydie]

whoa

the king is a pos :/ what a dog wtf