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@dadgotfat
Dad’s always been a heavyset guy, but after being tabbed as the next Santa in our local holiday parade, he started actively gaining as much weight as possible to better “look the part.” He's now up 40 lbs (and counting) and keeps bragging to his buds that unlike past Santas, he won’t need padding since he “comes by the extra stuffing naturally.”
After leaving Dad at home with my feeder boyfriend for a month while on a business trip, Dad was looking noticeably thicker once I got back.
Dad & I have been showering together to save water (or something...)
Sleep study fatty
With all the pounds my buddy Jeff has been piling on, I'm surprised it took him this long to join the CPAP club.
Since I reintroduced Dad to weed, he's become a total pothead.
In this new sedentary lifestyle, we spend most weekends together at Dad's taking bong rips, ordering loads of takeout, and teasing each other over how fat we're both getting.
PERVYBIG
Dad’s shirts aren’t leaving much to the imagination these days. Even less so after he fully sweats through them. 👀
Whenever I hang out at Dad's place, he always makes an excessive number of appetizers for us to munch on. After I eat a few, Dad always ends up eating the rest "so they don't go to waste!"
Dad was in denial about how fat he’s gotten until he arrived at his annual work conference and couldn’t squeeze into any of his suits.
"Thank god there was a big & tall store less than a mile from the hotel," Dad told me later. "Can you believe your old man is rocking 4XLT shirts and 58-inch slacks now?!"
I'm proud of Dad for finally putting himself out there and going on a bunch of dinner dates. When we met up the other day to catch up, though, I was taken aback by how much thicker he’s looking.
"Some of my dates have told me I look 'different' than in my pictures,” Dad was telling me. “I asked my most recent date to elaborate and he said, as gently as possible, that I might want to consider updating my body type on the app from 'Husky' to 'Fat'!!! Can you believe it?” Dad laughed. “I know I’ve put on a little weight recently from eating out a lot, and I noticed my dates have started calling me ‘big guy,’ but surely I’m not 'FAT'… right?”
After a night of heavy drinking, nothing beats a sauna session with Dad to sweat out the booze!
My fraternity brother started getting fat as he stress ate his way through grad school but his weight gain completely spiraled out of control when he began working a sedentary desk job.
“I figured I’d end up as a fat guy eventually, but I never thought I’d be pushing 350 pounds one year into my career...” he confessed.
Dads belly is almost at his knees 🤩
When Dad showed up to his birthday brunch buffet wearing his work uniform, I asked why he didn't wear something more comfortable.
"That would’ve been nice, but nothing else fits,” he huffed, buttons straining against his belly. “I’m just hoping I can make it through brunch without losing a button!”
When Dad finally got on the big boy dating apps, he was surprised by how many matches he was getting.
"If I knew this many men are into fat old guys with flabby tits, I would've let myself go a lot sooner," he admitted.
No one loves a cruise more than Dad, though he complained the pool chairs “aren’t as sturdy these days.”
Sure, Dad.
To say thanks for treating him to countless buffets and fast food trips this summer, my buddy surprised me with a free "Fat Boy Car Wash.”
"Feel free to inspect the damage since it's basically your fault I'm this fat now," he said with a grin after stripping down to his boxers.
Dad loves having a big belly but he’s still getting used to his new physical limitations.
Five minutes into today's stroll around the lake, Dad needed to take a break, already sweaty and out-of-breath.
“Can you believe your old man used to run several half marathons a year?” Dad asked between labored breaths. “These days I’m too fat to walk a 5K,” he laughed, gazing down at his gut with pride.
Would love to be stuck next to this guy on a long flight 😍👀
We arrived at the airport extra early so Dad had time to fill up the tank before our long flight. Now, stuffed full of Whataburger, Panda Express, and Cinnabon, Dad’s snoozing away until it’s time to board.
